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Inappropriate questions at the dinner table
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When we were very little my sister (aged about four) asked in the middle of Sunday lunch "what's a homosexual?"
I (aged about six) apparently instantly answered, without skipping a beat "it's a man who tries to make another man pregnant".
This apparently satisfied younger sibling's enquiry and only left my poor mum and dad wondering how I had gleaned my, slight skewed information.
Out of the mouths of babes and children  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"When we were very little my sister (aged about four) asked in the middle of Sunday lunch "what's a homosexual?"
I (aged about six) apparently instantly answered, without skipping a beat "it's a man who tries to make another man pregnant".
Awesome. I love what kids come out with.
This apparently satisfied younger sibling's enquiry and only left my poor mum and dad wondering how I had gleaned my, slight skewed information.
Out of the mouths of babes and children "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My brother came out a couple of months before Christmas a good few years ago, and I invited him and his partner to dinner the day before New Years, we were sitting around having a lovely time when my sister piped up and said "so do you play on the same team" every one gave her daggers and you could feel the rage welling up as my brother was just about to go mental, she must have realised what she said and said "sorry I'll re phrase that, didn't you two meet at football?" No one could eat after that, she's not the sharpest tool in the box my sister lol |
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Was not at the dinner table a young boy about 9 he was in our hotel we had seen him a few times with this couple i asked were is mum and dad were as we had spoken and shared a few drinks at the bar like you do on holiday.
Little lad said it,s not his proper dad is proper dad was at home he just called this man dad on holiday to make his mum happy then he said my proper dad says he,s a cunt young children dont lie |
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By *etLikeMan
over a year ago
most fundamental aspects |
Just yesterday at the Christmas dinner table of friends' I was asked about my "new woman". I had to be diplomatic in my answer; preferring to say "oh it's nothing too serious" rather than "yeah, I'm taking her to her first swingers' club" |
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I was outed by the other half's fuckwit brother at the outlaw's Xmas dinner some years ago.
Her mother choked on her food, her father was like, "What do you mean, he dances at both ends of the ballroom?!"
I wanted the ground to swallow me up... And the other half...?
She told her brother to STFU, that he didn't know what he was talking about and it had nothing to do with him.
:o |
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The night before my wedding my nearly 4 yr old told all my family & friends in a very quiet hotel restaurant that my hairy fairy had fallen off & pointed to his nether regions. My mother in laws face was a picture |
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My son just comes out with stuff and doesn't care has no concept of what's a good topic of conversation .
On his 21st was out for a family meal and he worked in an elderly care home and went into great detail about what they do when they walk in on the residents masterbating
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Was in an Indian restaurant once and overheard a family ordering their meal on a nearby table. There was a young lad on their table and he said loudly..."Mom are we having some of those condoms again?"
The mom quickly jumped in and said...."No dear they are called popadoms!" |
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By *olgateMan
over a year ago
on the road to nowhere in particular |
My partner at the time was asked by an elderly relative if she would ever consider having an affair?
"Potential mother in laws dinner table is not the best place to discuss this topic " was the reply
C... |
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Over Xmas dinner our 4 year old son asked my sisters boyfriend if he was trying to make her pregnant on the sofa the previous night, as they were making a lot of noise!
Cue a choking fit from the poor guy as he had been mid-swallow of a mouthful of turkey!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My sister in law asked me how much Christmas bonus I got? 
Anyone top that?
Oh, I never answered the question."
hey I wouldn't see that as an inappropriate question but is that one of your ginger pubes in my ice cream  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Was in an Indian restaurant once and overheard a family ordering their meal on a nearby table. There was a young lad on their table and he said loudly..."Mom are we having some of those condoms again?"
The mom quickly jumped in and said...."No dear they are called popadoms!""
Mom? |
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By *olgateMan
over a year ago
on the road to nowhere in particular |
"Was in an Indian restaurant once and overheard a family ordering their meal on a nearby table. There was a young lad on their table and he said loudly..."Mom are we having some of those condoms again?"
The mom quickly jumped in and said...."No dear they are called popadoms!"
Mom? "
that was my thought too |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I was at an ex girlfriends wedding (with my then current gf) the groom was an old school chum of mine.
The brides mother...in front of us all and several of her relatives genuinely asked if I was taking the bride on holiday again that summer...... Seriously! A few of the older Aunts didn't half give some strange looks... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Was in an Indian restaurant once and overheard a family ordering their meal on a nearby table. There was a young lad on their table and he said loudly..."Mom are we having some of those condoms again?"
The mom quickly jumped in and said...."No dear they are called popadoms!"
Mom? that was my thought too "
Whats wrong with that, I say mom? Or am I being dispy again like normal  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Horrid Americanism
It's mum over here, the only transatlantic saying permissible is ma and only if you are from Liverpool
C..."
Haha, ok, but I still say mom or mum depends who I'm talking too lol |
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"Was in an Indian restaurant once and overheard a family ordering their meal on a nearby table. There was a young lad on their table and he said loudly..."Mom are we having some of those condoms again?"
The mom quickly jumped in and said...."No dear they are called popadoms!"
Mom? that was my thought too
Whats wrong with that, I say mom? Or am I being dispy again like normal "
Nothing wrong with mom, it was a young kid who said it. He just got mixed up with the word condom and popadom, most people in the restaurant laughed when he said it. |
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"Horrid Americanism
It's mum over here, the only transatlantic saying permissible is ma and only if you are from Liverpool
C...
Haha, ok, but I still say mom or mum depends who I'm talking too lol "
Most people I know around the cannock area say mom, never thought of it as an Americanism?  |
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By *lighty1Woman
over a year ago
You Dont Need to Know, right now |
My neighbour used to boast that her son's car had a 'virile' roof.
Vinyl roof. For those who can't remember, they were black plastic roofs on any other coloured car.
I'll get my coat.  |
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"At the end of Christmas dinner one year my Mum said "I'll clear up and you all go dogging."
your mum sounds like fun.  "
She was wonderful 
At the time I said "I'm not sure you're supposed to say that". So she said "Why?" and I said "I'm not sure but I think it's something unsavoury."
My Dad then said "It's to do with people meeting up outside to have sex." To which my Mum said "How on earth do you know that???"
He'd read about it of course.
What she's meant was whilst she tidied up we should all go out with the dogs for a good dog walk |
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"Horrid Americanism
It's mum over here, the only transatlantic saying permissible is ma and only if you are from Liverpool
C..."
what a load of bollocks, mom,mam have been localised to certain areas long before we had Americanisms.
My dad said mom all his life and I'm sure he never got it from the americans  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Mom, Mum. In this part of Wales we say Mam just saying. I'll get my coat "
Nothing wrong with how it's pronounced around the country, but in literature, here anyway, it's normally spelt "mum", sorry just being being anal I guess....ooh Mrs |
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