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Do's and dont's at the works Christmas party
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Stick to beer, in my experience at the point of moving to spirits is when the wheels come completely off. One minute you're talking shop with the HR manager and the next your trousers are around you ankles and you are singing bawdy rugby songs to the girl in accounts that started a week ago.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Dont call naked bar and try and strip/molest the bosses wife.
Dont leave the guy with 200+ tinder dates alone with you partner
Do not piss in the port decanter at the table |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Oh, and subtly cock block if you know a workmate will wake up filled with regret following a dodgy pull. They won't thank you at the time but will love you for it when they sober up."
This |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My colleague last year found that telling his boss that she is an uptight and generally hated bitch, and then going on to tell the department head that he only promoted the uptight and generally hated bitch, was because he used to fuck her... made it difficult for my colleague to get a promotion he was due 
Apparently being honest doesn't help your career |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Do place your cock on the Secretary's shoulder like one of the lads did at ours last year,and then watch it all go off like a group of casuals at a footie match |
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There was the year when I was being made redundant from the nice little charity I worked at and we had an new Chief Exec who used to be a banker. I thought I'd take the opportunity to let him know how I felt.
At the Xmas party I publicly upbraided him in front of the staff:
"Who the fuck do you think you are, coming in here with yr MBA and a bleeding heart, thinking you understand an organisation like this?!"
Rant rant.
Went home, felt better. I had nothing to lose and get it off my chest.
Next day, I get a call offering me a job... I'm like... ohhh, I'll have to go back and see him... |
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By *dwalu2Couple
over a year ago
Bristol |
"Oh, and subtly cock block if you know a workmate will wake up filled with regret following a dodgy pull. They won't thank you at the time but will love you for it when they sober up."
Good advice for all boozy office get togethers, not just at Christmas! |
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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago
harrow |
Well....don't get pissed before you get there...done for the last 8 years
Don't try and sneak in a 1l bottle of vodka
Don't tell an intern that when you are looking at her boobs that your are, and there nice, then cock your head and say you arse ain't half bad either
Don't get so pissed you don't remember leaving the club after the party, or getting back to hotel or throwing up outside a window in hotel but miss have sick dripping down it and then wake up half naked cold and feeling like shit
Dont leave your mate at a venue because he is to pissed to get on the coach
I would never do these things |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Dont do what a lady from work did last year...
Dont bring a trampy bipolar female with issues with alcohol...it was like watching a slow motion train wreck all night...bouncing from guy to guy. She went from grinding against the boss on the dancefloor (in front of his wife) to trying to wank off one of the guys in the bar..she threw up the entire length of the bus and the flat on camp that a load of guys had shared...opening the door tonthe duty officer in nothing but a short t shirt the next day. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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On a night out with work I ate garlic mushrooms and only had one glass of wine at this point .I stood up to excuse myself,as didn't feel good .But ended up vomiting all over the table .
I went home but next shift at work my boss laughed as she said she did the same once .
Never ever had garlic mushrooms again .  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Pre-arrange something much better that you sneak away to at an early point. You'll be fresher and enjoy it more, in anticipation that your do is just the warm up to the real thing later. "
Now there's a good idea |
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"Don't show your boss your knickers !
Yep !!!!
 "
Oh you've just reminded me of the time I flashed my boobs to my former line manager - not normally something that would bother me too much but he is a devout Muslim It took him a while to speak to me again |
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