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How to deal with break up
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By *ust1fb OP Man
over a year ago
leeds |
Hi guys I have just broke up with my partner of ten years. Am really struggling to deal with it as I loved her very much. Any words of advice.
Please don't take piss am really feeling down atm. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I will its not a problem of going to a club I can manage that"
I went back to check the name of the club, as in today's times  and yep....but noticed it was a veri for a couple so prior to your split.
Maybe go for a nice walk. As I'm not sure a swinging forum will find you the answers....but hey, never say never. |
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Was in your shoes 10 months ago, and every one said time will heal and it didn't seem possible, but I hurt less now than I did do seems time really is a great healer.... All I would say is try not to jump from frying pan into the fire.... It's too easy to look for a replacement, be kind to yourself, and cry.... Better out than in..... And that's not a phrase I tend to use on fab!!! ?? |
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By *ust1fb OP Man
over a year ago
leeds |
"I will its not a problem of going to a club I can manage that
I went back to check the name of the club, as in today's times and yep....but noticed it was a veri for a couple so prior to your split.
Maybe go for a nice walk. As I'm not sure a swinging forum will find you the answers....but hey, never say never."
Should we call u inspector clusoe .... not every one is a liar thankx xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"dignity at all costs"
^^^^^ this
Find something you love doing, not something you did with your ex, but something you can do alone, be good to yourself and kind to your spirit, things will get better  |
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By *ust1fb OP Man
over a year ago
leeds |
"dignity at all costs
^^^^^ this
Find something you love doing, not something you did with your ex, but something you can do alone, be good to yourself and kind to your spirit, things will get better "
A wank comes to mind lol
Yes will try thankx mate |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"dignity at all costs
^^^^^ this
Find something you love doing, not something you did with your ex, but something you can do alone, be good to yourself and kind to your spirit, things will get better
A wank comes to mind lol
Yes will try thankx mate"
Hey, what ever gets you through my man  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I will its not a problem of going to a club I can manage that
I went back to check the name of the club, as in today's times and yep....but noticed it was a veri for a couple so prior to your split.
Maybe go for a nice walk. As I'm not sure a swinging forum will find you the answers....but hey, never say never.
Should we call u inspector clusoe .... not every one is a liar thankx xx"
I never assumed you were lying about being newly single. Just that 2 weeks and 3 veris...I was a little unsure as to where the upset was coming from. But hey whats ten years after 2 weeks on fab as a single Jim and I'm sure all is forgotten. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Was in your shoes 10 months ago, and every one said time will heal and it didn't seem possible, but I hurt less now than I did do seems time really is a great healer.... All I would say is try not to jump from frying pan into the fire.... It's too easy to look for a replacement, be kind to yourself, and cry.... Better out than in..... And that's not a phrase I tend to use on fab!!! ??"
/\ what she said.
I'm addition.....gin. Gin helps a lot. |
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Lots of things will be changing in your life. Don't beat yourself up on the days you get maudlin, your allowed to grieve, but also remember that you have to move forward and not stay in a time warp.
I know nothing about whether children are involved or whether it was amicable or not it when your having a good day sit and right a list of things you would like to do, could be big things or small, maybe a new hobby.
Some people don't like to do stuff as a singleton as they think some things are couple based but I don't think that is necessarily so. You could go on a holiday either on your own or with a group.
Good luck |
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be around people ..... go to places where there are shit loads of people and strike up a conversation with as many of them as you can. you can't beat positive human interaction with people you've never met before for making you feel valued again. hanging out with existing friends is all well and good but they'll naturally try to say the right thing out of compassion and it won't help in the short term. i'm not saying ditch your mates though as they are still important. going to gigs is usually a good place. |
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By *ust1fb OP Man
over a year ago
leeds |
"be around people ..... go to places where there are shit loads of people and strike up a conversation with as many of them as you can. you can't beat positive human interaction with people you've never met before for making you feel valued again. hanging out with existing friends is all well and good but they'll naturally try to say the right thing out of compassion and it won't help in the short term. i'm not saying ditch your mates though as they are still important. going to gigs is usually a good place."
Thanks that s a good idea |
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Allow yourself to feel shit then put effort into things that make you feel good. Like spending time with mates.
Don't drown your sorrows with booze, that only makes things feel worse.
And time really does make all the difference  |
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By *ust1fb OP Man
over a year ago
leeds |
"Allow yourself to feel shit then put effort into things that make you feel good. Like spending time with mates.
Don't drown your sorrows with booze, that only makes things feel worse.
And time really does make all the difference "
Thank you xx |
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By *irceWoman
over a year ago
Gloucester |
"Hi guys I have just broke up with my partner of ten years. Am really struggling to deal with it as I loved her very much. Any words of advice.
Please don't take piss am really feeling down atm."
Look up the phases of grief and understand its journey, one door closes and another opens, time for change go give it your all |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Find something new to try of learn. Pick up s guitar & play, some pencils & draw, a camera & head out into the hills. Mix a fun new hobby with being around your friends & family. But also allow some time for grief, tears & sadness. Don't bury your feelings but don't let them engulf you either. Thoughts with you!
Mr J |
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try forget about her and just say to yourself it's never going to happen enough times till it sinks in eventually as painful as it might be...
in the end you will see yourself that it's over for whichever reason it finished then you will be sore and down for a time then eventually you will move on, try not to dwell on it too much OP..
hope this some what helped even though it's not the best off advice OP. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi guys I have just broke up with my partner of ten years. Am really struggling to deal with it as I loved her very much. Any words of advice.
Please don't take piss am really feeling down atm."
good luck. it's not something i've dealt with well in the past. |
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"It's a fucking pain"
have you tried keeping yourself busy be it from work, hobbies etc as that can take you're mind off it be for a few hours a day..
try talk to you're family members too or friends and clear you're mind mate, all the best. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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OK I literally just read the first post so dont know the ins and outs but it's a tough one as I think every individual deals with break ups differently. One thing worth remembering is that its better to be single than be in a one way relationship, which by the sounds of the things would be the case for you. Remember that although you love her, you deserve someone that will love and respect you back hope you find a way to deal with this OP good luck |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If you have close friends, they're always a win.
The free time you spent with your ex, use for something else.
Puppies, kittens, any animal really. They've helped me through a few break ups.
Video games have also helped.
I used to write a lot too.
But not in a while.
Hope at least one works for you. |
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By *ust1fb OP Man
over a year ago
leeds |
"Hi guys I have just broke up with my partner of ten years. Am really struggling to deal with it as I loved her very much. Any words of advice.
Please don't take piss am really feeling down atm.
Look up the phases of grief and understand its journey, one door closes and another opens, time for change go give it your all "
Thank you xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Feel for you going through same wife wanted out after 13 years of marriage I have six kids too!
She has moved on to tinder shagging 2_0 up on me already so no respect for anyone's feelings. It hurts but life moves on be yourself enjoy life for you and if it happens it happens don't let your ex ruin your life x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi guys I have just broke up with my partner of ten years. Am really struggling to deal with it as I loved her very much. Any words of advice.
Please don't take piss am really feeling down atm."
Ten years is a long time, my friend. They often say that if a friendship can last ten years, it would last a lifetime.
Try to see that this is what's best for both of you, rather than staying together dishonestly. And appreciate how good the last decade was for you.
And as a matter of fact, you can consider yourself wealthy, because when you're gradually ready to move on, you'll have wisdom and experience of such a long term commitment to take with you, and if there's one thing women appreciate in a man, it's maturity. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi guys I have just broke up with my partner of ten years. Am really struggling to deal with it as I loved her very much. Any words of advice.
Please don't take piss am really feeling down atm."
Well for a start I think I would be not looking for sex as a temporary relief as you will just cause your body and mind to be less in Union which will cause lots of issues. Obviously nobody knows what has occurred between you and your partner but after 10 years it will hurt a bit but get back in touch with yourself and do things in your own way and you might quite like the 'you' that you get back in touch with
I hope it all works out for you but please don't make yourself look needy,not many find that attractive. |
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By *dluv2Man
over a year ago
glasgow |
Bluntly "fuck her move on" if it's broke it will always be broke, millions of new adventures to be had in life. Do what people do here have wild sexual encounters try some fantasys and explore what having fun is all aboub. Plenty of good people here that will help keep your mind busy |
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By *assie48Woman
over a year ago
Stoke-on-Trent |
Just keep ur head held high I was in this situation two years ago but don't rush into anything else get ur head clear first wen my ex left he left his kids behind who weren't mine so I had that to contend with also all the lies him and his new partner were telling people about me |
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By *ust1fb OP Man
over a year ago
leeds |
A couple of years down the line I am in a better place I am still single .
I appreciate all the kind words you guys gave me thank you very much .
God bless you all you were there in my bad times xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"A couple of years down the line I am in a better place I am still single .
I appreciate all the kind words you guys gave me thank you very much .
God bless you all you were there in my bad times xxx"
Glad to hear you're in a better place
As devastating as it must have been - its not the end of the world |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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When it's hard, remember why you broke up. As time passes the grief will fade but so will the memory of why you left. It's important that you remember this elsethere will be a constant temptation to go back. Splitting up is genuinely like a death - the person may not be dead but in a way they are to you. Whatever made you split, you were together 10 years and that's gonna include a lot of happy memories. No need to dismiss them, they were and are real - just as the sad ones that made you split are too.
Time is a healer- and it may take a long time but if you stick with it you will get there.
Mr |
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By *ust1fb OP Man
over a year ago
leeds |
"When it's hard, remember why you broke up. As time passes the grief will fade but so will the memory of why you left. It's important that you remember this elsethere will be a constant temptation to go back. Splitting up is genuinely like a death - the person may not be dead but in a way they are to you. Whatever made you split, you were together 10 years and that's gonna include a lot of happy memories. No need to dismiss them, they were and are real - just as the sad ones that made you split are too.
Time is a healer- and it may take a long time but if you stick with it you will get there.
Mr"
So true thanks for that I was thee a few weeks ago |
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