FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > D.I.V.O.R.C.E.
D.I.V.O.R.C.E.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Apparently approximately 48% of UK marriages end in Divorce....
The average time a marriage lasts before divorce is around 11-1/2 years......
3 billion quid gets spent every year on the trapping of marriages ceremonies which ultimately end in divorce....
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By *LCCCouple
over a year ago
Cambridge |
"Wonder how many of those can be attributed to Fab  "
From the singles or the couples? I would wager that the average swinging marriage lasts longer than the average vanilla one. |
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By *exysuzi and Mr.SCouple
over a year ago
CONISTON .Stoke Suburbia. Staffs. BARMOUTH. The Lakes (Monthly) |
"Wonder how many of those can be attributed to Fab
From the singles or the couples? I would wager that the average swinging marriage lasts longer than the average vanilla one. "
We would counter wager that, we have been married 31 years before we started swinging xxxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"That means 52% end in death! Which would u prefer?
Depends on the manner of death,,,,
Bludgeoned by cock seems a reasonable option.... "
Yeh smothered by a pussy sounds a good way to go too! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Wonder how many of those can be attributed to Fab
From the singles or the couples? I would wager that the average swinging marriage lasts longer than the average vanilla one. "
Second that. 4 studies concluded that over half of vanilla marriages suffer some form of cheating and a separate study showed that the ratio of sex to arguments is the leading predictor of marital success - swingers have advantages in both those areas so it stands to reason. |
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By *LCCCouple
over a year ago
Cambridge |
"Wonder how many of those can be attributed to Fab
From the singles or the couples? I would wager that the average swinging marriage lasts longer than the average vanilla one.
We would counter wager that, we have been married 31 years before we started swinging xxxx"
And you think that you are now more likely to get divorced than before? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm getting divorced and we had a couples profile on here. He still needed a single 1 too though. Sadly I didn't know about that 1. Anyway plenty more men to play with..  marriage lasted 3 years half of that he spent on here telling everyone how single he was. Now we are both on here as singles! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm getting divorced and we had a couples profile on here. He still needed a single 1 too though. Sadly I didn't know about that 1. Anyway plenty more men to play with.. marriage lasted 3 years half of that he spent on here telling everyone how single he was. Now we are both on here as singles! "
If and when I settle down I'll either leave, have a joint couples profile or have a couple + a single profile each |
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By *exysuzi and Mr.SCouple
over a year ago
CONISTON .Stoke Suburbia. Staffs. BARMOUTH. The Lakes (Monthly) |
"Wonder how many of those can be attributed to Fab
From the singles or the couples? I would wager that the average swinging marriage lasts longer than the average vanilla one.
We would counter wager that, we have been married 31 years before we started swinging xxxx
And you think that you are now more likely to get divorced than before?"
Absolutely not.....We are lucky I guess, we both have the same outlook on life, swinging is just yet another chapter in our lives..... 2 years swinging now and our marriage remains the same... secure and madly, deeply in love xxxxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm getting divorced and we had a couples profile on here. He still needed a single 1 too though. Sadly I didn't know about that 1. Anyway plenty more men to play with.. marriage lasted 3 years half of that he spent on here telling everyone how single he was. Now we are both on here as singles!
If and when I settle down I'll either leave, have a joint couples profile or have a couple + a single profile each"
Well that kinda covers all the options doesn't it? |
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"Apparently approximately 48% of UK marriages end in Divorce....
The average time a marriage lasts before divorce is around 11-1/2 years......
3 billion quid gets spent every year on the trapping of marriages ceremonies which ultimately end in divorce....
"
So the moral is dont get married! Lol |
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By *LCCCouple
over a year ago
Cambridge |
"Wonder how many of those can be attributed to Fab
From the singles or the couples? I would wager that the average swinging marriage lasts longer than the average vanilla one.
We would counter wager that, we have been married 31 years before we started swinging xxxx
And you think that you are now more likely to get divorced than before?
Absolutely not.....We are lucky I guess, we both have the same outlook on life, swinging is just yet another chapter in our lives..... 2 years swinging now and our marriage remains the same... secure and madly, deeply in love xxxxx"
So why would you counter the wager then? Remember we are talking about generalities, and averages here rather than individual examples, but I think that if a marriage is strong enough to talk about things such as swinging, its probably going to last longer than a marriage that isn't strong enough to even discuss it.
The post that I quote was how many divorces are attributable to fab. I can imagine that a lot of the "single" profiles are, as people have mentioned about, some are just pretending to be single, which would obviously cause a problem once it gets found out. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm getting divorced and we had a couples profile on here. He still needed a single 1 too though. Sadly I didn't know about that 1. Anyway plenty more men to play with.. marriage lasted 3 years half of that he spent on here telling everyone how single he was. Now we are both on here as singles!
If and when I settle down I'll either leave, have a joint couples profile or have a couple + a single profile each
Well that kinda covers all the options doesn't it? "
What I'm saying is my partner will know what ever I am doing! |
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"We were together 20 years, married for 6 before divorce. Now we are both on here - me as single & him as a couple.
If he'd had any sense he could've had his cake......."
And a bloody lovely cake it is, I wouldn't mind eating a slice or two myself, I bet it has cream filling as well.
Love you |
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By *LCCCouple
over a year ago
Cambridge |
"I'm getting divorced and we had a couples profile on here. He still needed a single 1 too though. Sadly I didn't know about that 1. Anyway plenty more men to play with.. marriage lasted 3 years half of that he spent on here telling everyone how single he was. Now we are both on here as singles! "
what a muppet. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Because Swingers don't ever cheat and don't get divorced.  "
I must have missed the post where someone said that. It must have gotten lost between the post by the woman who said her husband had a secret singles profile on here while they were married and the one who said her divorce was better than her wedding.
-Courtney |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Because Swingers don't ever cheat and don't get divorced.
I must have missed the post where someone said that. It must have gotten lost between the post by the woman who said her husband had a secret singles profile on here while they were married and the one who said her divorce was better than her wedding.
-Courtney"
It was there,between the lines.
I was forced to divorce my husband. He could have had his cake and eat it if he wasn't so paranoid about me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Because Swingers don't ever cheat and don't get divorced.
I must have missed the post where someone said that. It must have gotten lost between the post by the woman who said her husband had a secret singles profile on here while they were married and the one who said her divorce was better than her wedding.
-Courtney
It was there,between the lines.
"
It wasn't, some people just don't get the concept of probability. The only things that have been mentioned are swingers should have a lower divorce rate, as in less than 48% (i.e. not 0%) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Because Swingers don't ever cheat and don't get divorced.
I must have missed the post where someone said that. It must have gotten lost between the post by the woman who said her husband had a secret singles profile on here while they were married and the one who said her divorce was better than her wedding.
-Courtney
It was there,between the lines.
I was forced to divorce my husband. He could have had his cake and eat it if he wasn't so paranoid about me. "
See, I generally disagree with this. I saw people saying that they think couples on fab are less likely to get divorced, for various reasons. I don't think it is fair to take such a tempered statement and say that, between the lines, it means something absolute.
It would be fair to disagree with them, and I've seen many posts saying they think fab couples are more likely to get divorced (though not on this thread). I just don't think it's fair to take a person's post(s) and turn it into a straw man argument in one sentence.
-Courtney |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Loved my divorce
Sooooo much better than my wedding "
Oh yes,divorce is so much fun,so satisfying.Once is just never enough.I've had two already,anyone care to join me for a third?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Wonder how many of those can be attributed to Fab "
Given the number of site users, far far less than 1%.
There may well be other marriages which could have ended in divorce which have not because of sites like this. Although it's not a popular view, arguably there are some relationships where sex with others as an outlet is a positive thing. If the alternative was a full blown affair with a friend or someone from work, for example. There are relationships where one person quietly does their thing, the other does theirs, they are not proper "swingers" but they are happy and in love. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Wonder how many of those can be attributed to Fab
From the singles or the couples? I would wager that the average swinging marriage lasts longer than the average vanilla one. "
I don't think swinging matters
I think if your happy and love your husband/wife you will work through any problems you have, if your marriage fails I honestly think it will so whether your a swingers or not |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Wonder how many of those can be attributed to Fab
From the singles or the couples? I would wager that the average swinging marriage lasts longer than the average vanilla one.
I don't think swinging matters
I think if your happy and love your husband/wife you will work through any problems you have, if your marriage fails I honestly think it will so whether your a swingers or not "
I agree with this
-Courtney |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You said
From the singles or the couples? I would wager that the average swinging marriage lasts longer than the average vanilla one.
My point is that,although a lot of people cheat in non swinging relationships,being swingers wouldn't make you any less likely to divorce. I don't think sex is the main reason for people to divorce. Swingers have other problems too,and some still cheat. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Wonder how many of those can be attributed to Fab
From the singles or the couples? I would wager that the average swinging marriage lasts longer than the average vanilla one.
I don't think swinging matters
I think if your happy and love your husband/wife you will work through any problems you have, if your marriage fails I honestly think it will so whether your a swingers or not
I agree with this
-Courtney"
This is what I was trying to say. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Wonder how many of those can be attributed to Fab
From the singles or the couples? I would wager that the average swinging marriage lasts longer than the average vanilla one.
I don't think swinging matters
I think if your happy and love your husband/wife you will work through any problems you have, if your marriage fails I honestly think it will so whether your a swingers or not
I agree with this
-Courtney
This is what I was trying to say. "
I do think a lot of people come into this thinking it will save their failing marriage though, in my experience it very rarely does
My ex husband left me for a women we used to meet through swinging but we wasn't really happy anyway
I honestly think if your in a loving relationship your wouldnt throw that away for somebody you met through swinging
Swinging couples who cheat, and yes it happens I get a lot of mail from male half's of couples wanting to meet me alone without their wife knowing, are doing this for the wrong reason and the type who's marriage is mostly likely to fail
Swinging does not always being people closer together |
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By *LCCCouple
over a year ago
Cambridge |
"You said
From the singles or the couples? I would wager that the average swinging marriage lasts longer than the average vanilla one.
My point is that,although a lot of people cheat in non swinging relationships,being swingers wouldn't make you any less likely to divorce. I don't think sex is the main reason for people to divorce. Swingers have other problems too,and some still cheat. "
I never said it was about cheating though. You are making that assumption. Since my wife and I have started swinging our communication has improved, we are more open and honest with each other about our feelings etc. And I think that generally speaking, marriages with better communication last longer.
You seem to be talking about specific marriages, when the thread is about Average length or marriages.
I see other people have said it wont make a difference, but I think its highly unlikely that there would be no difference at all in average marriage length between the two groups. Statistics dont tend to work that way. It would also depend on sample sizes too. Obviously there are a lot more vanilla people in the U.K. than ethically non-monogamous people, so that would have an effect too. With a smaller sample size, idividual deviations will have a greater effect. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You said
From the singles or the couples? I would wager that the average swinging marriage lasts longer than the average vanilla one.
My point is that,although a lot of people cheat in non swinging relationships,being swingers wouldn't make you any less likely to divorce. I don't think sex is the main reason for people to divorce. Swingers have other problems too,and some still cheat.
I never said it was about cheating though. You are making that assumption. Since my wife and I have started swinging our communication has improved, we are more open and honest with each other about our feelings etc. And I think that generally speaking, marriages with better communication last longer.
You seem to be talking about specific marriages, when the thread is about Average length or marriages.
I see other people have said it wont make a difference, but I think its highly unlikely that there would be no difference at all in average marriage length between the two groups. Statistics dont tend to work that way. It would also depend on sample sizes too. Obviously there are a lot more vanilla people in the U.K. than ethically non-monogamous people, so that would have an effect too. With a smaller sample size, idividual deviations will have a greater effect."
I'm not talking about specific marriages,I'm saying that I don't think a relationship will survive longer just because they are swingers. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You said
From the singles or the couples? I would wager that the average swinging marriage lasts longer than the average vanilla one.
My point is that,although a lot of people cheat in non swinging relationships,being swingers wouldn't make you any less likely to divorce. I don't think sex is the main reason for people to divorce. Swingers have other problems too,and some still cheat.
I never said it was about cheating though. You are making that assumption. Since my wife and I have started swinging our communication has improved, we are more open and honest with each other about our feelings etc. And I think that generally speaking, marriages with better communication last longer.
You seem to be talking about specific marriages, when the thread is about Average length or marriages.
I see other people have said it wont make a difference, but I think its highly unlikely that there would be no difference at all in average marriage length between the two groups. Statistics dont tend to work that way. It would also depend on sample sizes too. Obviously there are a lot more vanilla people in the U.K. than ethically non-monogamous people, so that would have an effect too. With a smaller sample size, idividual deviations will have a greater effect."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I never said it was about cheating though. You are making that assumption. Since my wife and I have started swinging our communication has improved, we are more open and honest with each other about our feelings etc. And I think that generally speaking, marriages with better communication last longer.
You seem to be talking about specific marriages, when the thread is about Average length or marriages.
I see other people have said it wont make a difference, but I think its highly unlikely that there would be no difference at all in average marriage length between the two groups. Statistics dont tend to work that way. It would also depend on sample sizes too. Obviously there are a lot more vanilla people in the U.K. than ethically non-monogamous people, so that would have an effect too. With a smaller sample size, idividual deviations will have a greater effect."
Can I just say...the term "ethically non-monogamous people" made me laugh really hard. Thank you for that
-Courtney |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I never said it was about cheating though. You are making that assumption. Since my wife and I have started swinging our communication has improved, we are more open and honest with each other about our feelings etc. And I think that generally speaking, marriages with better communication last longer.
You seem to be talking about specific marriages, when the thread is about Average length or marriages.
I see other people have said it wont make a difference, but I think its highly unlikely that there would be no difference at all in average marriage length between the two groups. Statistics dont tend to work that way. It would also depend on sample sizes too. Obviously there are a lot more vanilla people in the U.K. than ethically non-monogamous people, so that would have an effect too. With a smaller sample size, idividual deviations will have a greater effect.
Can I just say...the term "ethically non-monogamous people" made me laugh really hard. Thank you for that
-Courtney"
ENP for short, I like that term a lot more than 'the lifestyle', we're not in the lifestyle, we're ENP |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"That means 52% end in death! Which would u prefer?
Depends on the manner of death,,,,
Bludgeoned by cock seems a reasonable option.... "
i cld do with a good blugeoning hahaha |
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"Loved my divorce
Sooooo much better than my wedding
Oh yes,divorce is so much fun,so satisfying.Once is just never enough.I've had two already,anyone care to join me for a third? "
I wouldn't want to meet just to prepare for a future divorce but, if the way you handle an ice cream is any indication of how you might handle other things, I'd definitely want to meet you to see what else you can lick. |
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By *LCCCouple
over a year ago
Cambridge |
"I never said it was about cheating though. You are making that assumption. Since my wife and I have started swinging our communication has improved, we are more open and honest with each other about our feelings etc. And I think that generally speaking, marriages with better communication last longer.
You seem to be talking about specific marriages, when the thread is about Average length or marriages.
I see other people have said it wont make a difference, but I think its highly unlikely that there would be no difference at all in average marriage length between the two groups. Statistics dont tend to work that way. It would also depend on sample sizes too. Obviously there are a lot more vanilla people in the U.K. than ethically non-monogamous people, so that would have an effect too. With a smaller sample size, idividual deviations will have a greater effect.
Can I just say...the term "ethically non-monogamous people" made me laugh really hard. Thank you for that
-Courtney"
Thanks, I'm here all week!
Ethically non-monogamous covers swingers, poly, open relationships etc. etc. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I never said it was about cheating though. You are making that assumption. Since my wife and I have started swinging our communication has improved, we are more open and honest with each other about our feelings etc. And I think that generally speaking, marriages with better communication last longer.
You seem to be talking about specific marriages, when the thread is about Average length or marriages.
I see other people have said it wont make a difference, but I think its highly unlikely that there would be no difference at all in average marriage length between the two groups. Statistics dont tend to work that way. It would also depend on sample sizes too. Obviously there are a lot more vanilla people in the U.K. than ethically non-monogamous people, so that would have an effect too. With a smaller sample size, idividual deviations will have a greater effect.
Can I just say...the term "ethically non-monogamous people" made me laugh really hard. Thank you for that
-Courtney
Thanks, I'm here all week!
Ethically non-monogamous covers swingers, poly, open relationships etc. etc."
Thanks for the clarification, i'll inform the dictionary editors |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"100% of my marriages ended in divorce "
I think that's why a lot of people are to quick to get married now days, because getting out of it is very easy |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"100% of my marriages ended in divorce
I think that's why a lot of people are to quick to get married now days, because getting out of it is very easy "
People aren't that quick to get married, actually. Marriage rates are falling in noticeable amounts.
Studies in the uk note that in 2012 14% of brides were under the age of 25 compared with 76% in the late 1960s. There has also been an overall decline in marriages beginning in the 1970s. (source: Office for National Statistics, ons.gov.uk)
-Courtney |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Apparently approximately 48% of UK marriages end in Divorce....
The average time a marriage lasts before divorce is around 11-1/2 years......
3 billion quid gets spent every year on the trapping of marriages ceremonies which ultimately end in divorce....
"
I love stats. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Apparently approximately 48% of UK marriages end in Divorce....
The average time a marriage lasts before divorce is around 11-1/2 years......
3 billion quid gets spent every year on the trapping of marriages ceremonies which ultimately end in divorce....
I love stats. "
Yep although apparently if you prefix a Stat with the word estimate or approximately..... anything is permissible ..... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Wonder how many of those can be attributed to Fab
Given the number of site users, far far less than 1%.
There may well be other marriages which could have ended in divorce which have not because of sites like this. Although it's not a popular view, arguably there are some relationships where sex with others as an outlet is a positive thing. If the alternative was a full blown affair with a friend or someone from work, for example. There are relationships where one person quietly does their thing, the other does theirs, they are not proper "swingers" but they are happy and in love. "
Cheating can end marriages.
Cheating can save marriages. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I was engaged for 11 years but luckily didn't marry him so saved money from both the wedding and divorce.
When I marry cin it'll be so expensive he won't be able to afford to divorce me. Lol."
 Thank god your not marrying me for my money as at this rate I won't have any lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Loved my divorce
Sooooo much better than my wedding
Oh yes,divorce is so much fun,so satisfying.Once is just never enough.I've had two already,anyone care to join me for a third?
I wouldn't want to meet just to prepare for a future divorce but, if the way you handle an ice cream is any indication of how you might handle other things, I'd definitely want to meet you to see what else you can lick. "
Well,I'm not sure exactly what caused two spouses to boot me out of the door so unceremoniously but I'm pretty sure it wasn't any lack of lingual skills.  |
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"Apparently the average cost of a wedding is approximately £25K......  "
Yep, my daughter spent that on her wedding three years ago, not including her £3,500 dress that I bought. She only had 50 people for the wedding breakfast and about 150 for the evening reception. Guests had to pay for their own drinks after a certain time.
Compare that to my wedding which cost about £1,500. 600 guests, three pastors that gave their service for free, family friends. Food and cake provided by family and friends. Hall provided by friends decorated by family. My dress £120, £60 of that was for the material, the mum of my husbands friend made it plus the eight bridesmaids dresses at £30 each. My parents paid for the cars, imported non alcoholic wine from Israel, not like today when you can buy it in Asda. Vegetarian options in-laws paid for the booze.
It was a celebration. Invite was mainly word of mouth, the more the merrier.
If I marry again, Ben has talked about it, will probably take a half day flexi and pop down to the registry office and have a pub lunch. No fuss or frills. |
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"Getting divorced was the best thing ever..
Happily single "
I grieved for years when my marriage ended even though I filed for divorce. He made me wait five years but the 49 year old me still remembered the joy of the 20 year old me on her wedding day.
Six years after the divorce, 12 years after I walked out, still have moments. We're about to become grandparents, an event we should be sharing together, the first event we've not shared even after I left. We've travelled together to see the kids at uni, sat proudly together at graduations, I've had his mum for Christmas...All ended when my new partner moved in. I'm now a desperate slut apparently. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Getting divorced was the best thing ever..
Happily single
I grieved for years when my marriage ended even though I filed for divorce. He made me wait five years but the 49 year old me still remembered the joy of the 20 year old me on her wedding day.
Six years after the divorce, 12 years after I walked out, still have moments. We're about to become grandparents, an event we should be sharing together, the first event we've not shared even after I left. We've travelled together to see the kids at uni, sat proudly together at graduations, I've had his mum for Christmas...All ended when my new partner moved in. I'm now a desperate slut apparently. "
That must hurt. Did he ever meet someone else or is he still single? |
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Lots of reasons why marriages end.
Infidelity is one, but if you look at the stats there are many more.
Getting married too quickly is another. Loss of individual identity, domestic violence (sadly), money, lack of communication is a huge one, but so is simply falling out of love.
Not all divorce is acrimonious sometimes people can just have drifted apart.
As for swingers being less prone to divorce, I doubt there are any actual figures to back that up.
I'd never say I need a man (or a woman) as a reason for getting married.
I got married and I'm still married for the simplest of reasons I love my spouse. |
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"Getting divorced was the best thing ever..
Happily single
I grieved for years when my marriage ended even though I filed for divorce. He made me wait five years but the 49 year old me still remembered the joy of the 20 year old me on her wedding day.
Six years after the divorce, 12 years after I walked out, still have moments. We're about to become grandparents, an event we should be sharing together, the first event we've not shared even after I left. We've travelled together to see the kids at uni, sat proudly together at graduations, I've had his mum for Christmas...All ended when my new partner moved in. I'm now a desperate slut apparently.
That must hurt. Did he ever meet someone else or is he still single?"
It did hurt, still does, especially as our daughter had the twins today 
Used to introduce me as his wife his family used to ask if we're divorced as he never told them it was finalised.
In 13 years he's not dated. Wish he would, he's basically a good man. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Getting divorced was the best thing ever..
Happily single
I grieved for years when my marriage ended even though I filed for divorce. He made me wait five years but the 49 year old me still remembered the joy of the 20 year old me on her wedding day.
Six years after the divorce, 12 years after I walked out, still have moments. We're about to become grandparents, an event we should be sharing together, the first event we've not shared even after I left. We've travelled together to see the kids at uni, sat proudly together at graduations, I've had his mum for Christmas...All ended when my new partner moved in. I'm now a desperate slut apparently.
That must hurt. Did he ever meet someone else or is he still single?
It did hurt, still does, especially as our daughter had the twins today
Used to introduce me as his wife his family used to ask if we're divorced as he never told them it was finalised.
In 13 years he's not dated. Wish he would, he's basically a good man."
Awwww congrats Granny! I was wondering when they were due. x |
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"Getting divorced was the best thing ever..
Happily single
I grieved for years when my marriage ended even though I filed for divorce. He made me wait five years but the 49 year old me still remembered the joy of the 20 year old me on her wedding day.
Six years after the divorce, 12 years after I walked out, still have moments. We're about to become grandparents, an event we should be sharing together, the first event we've not shared even after I left. We've travelled together to see the kids at uni, sat proudly together at graduations, I've had his mum for Christmas...All ended when my new partner moved in. I'm now a desperate slut apparently.
That must hurt. Did he ever meet someone else or is he still single?
It did hurt, still does, especially as our daughter had the twins today
Used to introduce me as his wife his family used to ask if we're divorced as he never told them it was finalised.
In 13 years he's not dated. Wish he would, he's basically a good man.
Awwww congrats Granny! I was wondering when they were due. x "
Can't wait to see them |
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