FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > I'm NOT in love...

I'm NOT in love...

By *oward1978 OP Man over a year ago

Rotherham

There's been a lot of talk of true love and being in love here on the forums of late. I was just curious to know if there's actually anyone out there who has NEVER been in love. Or are there people who didn't truly find love until they were older? It seems to me that most seem to find it when they're really young.

I'll admit I never have. I've never even been close. It's also probably helped to screw me up a little as I would love to find it. Am I just a bit of a freak or are there others like me out there? I firmly believe there's many true loves out there, somewhere for each and every one of us. Is it just a case of getting lucky? The right place at the right time.

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By *lashheartMan over a year ago

shrewsbury

So don't forget it..

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By *iewMan over a year ago
Forum Mod

Angus & Findhorn

I haven't

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Nope. Never had the heart stopping brain fuddling 'wow, I'd die for you' kind of love I've heard about.

I don't think I could cope actually. All a bit intense for me.

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By *lashheartMan over a year ago

shrewsbury

Sensible answer though is I thought I was but now I'm not so sure.

So possibly never.

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By *icecouple561Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

"There's been a lot of talk of true love and being in love here on the forums of late. I was just curious to know if there's actually anyone out there who has NEVER been in love. Or are there people who didn't truly find love until they were older? It seems to me that most seem to find it when they're really young.

I will start by asking you what you feel true love is.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

You just have not met the one yet .... When you do you so will know it xx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I have found it once and naively believed love could conquer all but alas it doesn't and I had my heart broken. Very wary of letting it happen again hence why fab works well for me x

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By *tarbeckCouple over a year ago

york

I met steve on a blind date , iwas set up by my sister and didnt know he would be there . I hated it but was smitten with him by the end of the night and we have been together ever since , i suppose we were just lucky

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By *sianmale89Man over a year ago

Stockport

last time I loved a girl like that it was over 5 years ago OP.....needless to say my achilles heel when falling for a girl when I was younger was their beautiful looks/long hair (yes I was a bit shallow at times but as I got older the way they treated me as in kindness etc played a factor too)..

what can I say it used to hit me hard and strong I even wrote a girl a letter once when I was in school like a foolish little boy

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I've never been in love, but finally told the OH that I loved him on Friday.

It was worth the wait to say it truthfully

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By *oward1978 OP Man over a year ago

Rotherham

I will start by asking you what you feel true love is."

I don't think anyone truly knows. We all have our own definition of that word. Love is just a four letter word. I guess like everyone else who's found love for the first time, I'll know it when I feel it. I always imagine it's like finding someone who totally compliments you in every way. Like the missing piece of you. A piece that you didn't even know was missing. A person who you love more than you love yourself. A person that when they're not there has the effect of making you feel like something is missing from your body, like your heart isn't whole until they return to you.

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By *oward1978 OP Man over a year ago

Rotherham

"Nope. Never had the heart stopping brain fuddling 'wow, I'd die for you' kind of love I've heard about.

I don't think I could cope actually. All a bit intense for me. "

Same here. Never had that. I really feel I'm missing out on something

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By *iewMan over a year ago
Forum Mod

Angus & Findhorn

[Removed by poster at 22/11/15 14:22:57]

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By *iewMan over a year ago
Forum Mod

Angus & Findhorn

I don't seek it, I have no need for it, no desire for it and I feel free of it.

I do enjoy watching others who are so happy with each other, I find it moving.

I also find it so sad if I see a couple in a restaurant who look so unhappy, disconnected from each other and they can't even think of things to say.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I will start by asking you what you feel true love is.

I knew you would come up with an awesome answer

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I will start by asking you what you feel true love is.

I knew you would come up with an awesome answer

"
meant to be a smiley face

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"So don't forget it.."

10cc ??

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By *oward1978 OP Man over a year ago

Rotherham

"I don't seek it, I have no need for it, no desire for it and I feel free of it.

I do enjoy watching others who are so happy with each other, I find it moving.

I also find it so sad if I see a couple in a restaurant who look so unhappy, disconnected from each other and they can't even think of things to say.

I'm always very envious of loved up couples. Though it is nice to see.

I'm not actively seeking it. I honestly don't think that's the best way to find it. I'm waiting for fate to intervene. It's just that time's ticking on that's all. I need fate to pull it's finger out!

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By *iewMan over a year ago
Forum Mod

Angus & Findhorn

"I don't seek it, I have no need for it, no desire for it and I feel free of it.

I do enjoy watching others who are so happy with each other, I find it moving.

I also find it so sad if I see a couple in a restaurant who look so unhappy, disconnected from each other and they can't even think of things to say.

I'm always very envious of loved up couples. Though it is nice to see.

well I hope you find it one day and are blissfully happy with whoever you meet

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By *oward1978 OP Man over a year ago

Rotherham

I will start by asking you what you feel true love is.

I knew you would come up with an awesome answer

meant to be a smiley face

Awww thank you

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sensible answer though is I thought I was but now I'm not so sure.

So possibly never.

I'd put myself in this category too.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I will start by asking you what you feel true love is.

I like the word 'bond', far more accurate, understood and provable. Unfortunately, the word 'love' gets abused by the people who use it to try and rationalise some very stupid decisions, thus tainting it for the rest of us.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I've never been in love and at the age I am now, know that it will never happen. No big deal to be honest, at least everything I have is mine and I wouldn't have to lose it in a divorce court. Yes I've had relationships but more because I was lonely and wanted something I saw others having, now I am not that bothered about being on my own.

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By *icecouple561Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

I will start by asking you what you feel true love is.

I agree with you that everyone has a different definition of love and I suppose the first challenge is finding someone who defines it in a similar way. I'm lucky I found true love in my mind twenties but I don't think I knew it at the time I think it's taken years of building on a basis of mutual respect and understanding.

I hope you find your true love

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By *lashheartMan over a year ago

shrewsbury

"So don't forget it..

10cc ??"

Yep.

It's just a silly phase I'm going though

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I have never been in love

I've only ever had one relationship in all my life and I never loved him, I got pregnant by him not long after we met and by the time I realised he wasn't the guy I wanted to be with it was to late I was pregnant and stuck with him

never had a relationship before I met him and not had another since we split about 8 year ago now

so no ive never been in love

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I don't seek it, I have no need for it, no desire for it and I feel free of it.

I do enjoy watching others who are so happy with each other, I find it moving.

I also find it so sad if I see a couple in a restaurant who look so unhappy, disconnected from each other and they can't even think of things to say.

Whilst I was working at KFC a few years ago, a couple came in and they hated each other so much, they sat opposite sides of the building and hurled scathing abuse at each other

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By *aisyDoandDaisyDontWoman over a year ago

little old town of Reading!

"I have found it once and naively believed love could conquer all but alas it doesn't and I had my heart broken. Very wary of letting it happen again hence why fab works well for me x"

Same here... Part of me would love to feel like that for someone again. The other part ... The scared and hurt part, never wants to, because I don't think I could bear to go through that pain ever again. I often wish I had never been that happy. You don't know what you are missing if you never had it in the first place, kind of thing.

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By *icecouple561Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

"I don't seek it, I have no need for it, no desire for it and I feel free of it.

I do enjoy watching others who are so happy with each other, I find it moving.

I also find it so sad if I see a couple in a restaurant who look so unhappy, disconnected from each other and they can't even think of things to say.

Sometimes though they really, really love each other but have had a monumental row on the way and the restaurant has their number so they can't not turn up for their dinner reservation. A friend told me this, it's never happened to us obviously

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I dunno..I'd like to find someone who's as disconnected from the world as I feel...thats not me being depressive or anything..I just live in my own head a lot. The strongest feeling of love is possibly from pets I've had/have...I'd assume if/when I have children this would be the same(obviously magnified tenfold).

hope that makes sense..

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By *aisyDoandDaisyDontWoman over a year ago

little old town of Reading!

Ooh that was a bit of a depressing answer! Sorry everyone for bringing the mood down!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"So don't forget it..

10cc ??

Yep.

It's just a silly phase I'm going though "

Ba ba ba ba ba ba

That was my very first slow dance, showing my age

thought I was in love with him, but at 17 it was just a silly crush. Did however fall in love at 25 and it was reciprocated, never had it since sadly.

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By *oward1978 OP Man over a year ago

Rotherham

"I've never been in love and at the age I am now, know that it will never happen. No big deal to be honest, at least everything I have is mine and I wouldn't have to lose it in a divorce court. Yes I've had relationships but more because I was lonely and wanted something I saw others having, now I am not that bothered about being on my own."

I'd like to think it's never too late but I too have had similar thoughts. You do begin to wonder if it's just not meant to be. But I sometimes feel like my hearts going to explode. I have so much love to give. I just want to share it with someone before I go insane!

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By *icecouple561Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

"I dunno..I'd like to find someone who's as disconnected from the world as I feel...thats not me being depressive or anything..I just live in my own head a lot. The strongest feeling of love is possibly from pets I've had/have...I'd assume if/when I have children this would be the same(obviously magnified tenfold).

hope that makes sense.."

It makes absolute sense to me. I think the love for pets is grossly underestimated.

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By *oward1978 OP Man over a year ago

Rotherham

"Sensible answer though is I thought I was but now I'm not so sure.

So possibly never.

I'd put myself in this category too."

I imagine there's a lot of people like this. Thought they had it. Lost it. And then realise they didn't have it all.

Better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all? Hmmm maybe not.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

hope that makes sense..

It makes absolute sense to me. I think the love for pets is grossly underestimated."

I love my dogs more than my family the only people who come before my dogs are my children every body else takes a back seat

my dogs are the only things that love me unconditionally and are always happy to see me, nobody else has even given me that

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By *oward1978 OP Man over a year ago

Rotherham

"Ooh that was a bit of a depressing answer! Sorry everyone for bringing the mood down!

I know exactly what you meant. It was a good answer...though slightly depressing

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Eeee... yes & no. My only proper relationship occurred when I had depression & PTSD problems and my ex girlfriend had depression, anxiety & alcohol issues. We did love each other, but it sometimes felt like quite a desperate love - as in, that was the only thing that could fix us - and we were both too weak to really support each other.

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By *oward1978 OP Man over a year ago

Rotherham

hope that makes sense..

It makes absolute sense to me. I think the love for pets is grossly underestimated.

I love my dogs more than my family the only people who come before my dogs are my children every body else takes a back seat

my dogs are the only things that love me unconditionally and are always happy to see me, nobody else has even given me that

It's a (slightly depressing) fact that I loved my cat way more than I've ever loved a woman.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I don't seek it, I have no need for it, no desire for it and I feel free of it.

I do enjoy watching others who are so happy with each other, I find it moving.

I also find it so sad if I see a couple in a restaurant who look so unhappy, disconnected from each other and they can't even think of things to say.

Whilst I was working at KFC a few years ago, a couple came in and they hated each other so much, they sat opposite sides of the building and hurled scathing abuse at each other"

Yet they came in together

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By *aisyDoandDaisyDontWoman over a year ago

little old town of Reading!

"Ooh that was a bit of a depressing answer! Sorry everyone for bringing the mood down!

I know exactly what you meant. It was a good answer...though slightly depressing

Aww thank you

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

hope that makes sense..

It makes absolute sense to me. I think the love for pets is grossly underestimated.

I love my dogs more than my family the only people who come before my dogs are my children every body else takes a back seat

my dogs are the only things that love me unconditionally and are always happy to see me, nobody else has even given me that

It's a (slightly depressing) fact that I loved my cat way more than I've ever loved a woman."

It's not

partners come and go

pets are loyal for ever

when I've had a shit day at work my labrador always cheers me up, I walk in a the love he gives as he greets me would put a smile on anybody face, after if wrestled him off and calmed him down I always feel happy

no man has never made me feel like that, when I was married and I'd had a shit day at work I'd just walk into abuse, give me a dog over that anyday

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

My sister has had bf all her life Howi, I'd rather be single than having to go through heartache she has for everyone bar this recent one. And he isn't her true love!

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By *oward1978 OP Man over a year ago

Rotherham

hope that makes sense..

It makes absolute sense to me. I think the love for pets is grossly underestimated.

I love my dogs more than my family the only people who come before my dogs are my children every body else takes a back seat

my dogs are the only things that love me unconditionally and are always happy to see me, nobody else has even given me that

It's a (slightly depressing) fact that I loved my cat way more than I've ever loved a woman.

It's not

partners come and go

pets are loyal for ever

no man has never made me feel like that, when I was married and I'd had a shit day at work I'd just walk into abuse, give me a dog over that anyday

I understand totally what you're saying. They do love you unconditionally.

You should be able to find a guy who does that and more for you too. I don't think that's beyond the realms of possibility. That's not too much to ask. You may even get lucky and find yourself one who can even lick his own balls as well

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

though I've just watched the little prince(and wanted to phone my nanna!..she's not in lol)..sweet animated film about love and childhood.(yes theres a thread i've made on it..as usual nobody replies to my film/tv ravings lol)

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By *carlet_heavenWoman over a year ago

somewhere in the sticks

My take on true love is that you'll put that person's happiness & welfare above your own whether or not you're in a relationship with them (still or at the time).

Everyone's perception of love is different, but I believe you must be capable of loving another and being loved yourself at the same time in order to experience it.

Its essence is as much about yourself as meeting the right person for you.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

hope that makes sense..

It makes absolute sense to me. I think the love for pets is grossly underestimated.

I love my dogs more than my family the only people who come before my dogs are my children every body else takes a back seat

my dogs are the only things that love me unconditionally and are always happy to see me, nobody else has even given me that

It's a (slightly depressing) fact that I loved my cat way more than I've ever loved a woman.

It's not

partners come and go

pets are loyal for ever

no man has never made me feel like that, when I was married and I'd had a shit day at work I'd just walk into abuse, give me a dog over that anyday

I understand totally what you're saying. They do love you unconditionally.

I wouldnt ber licking my balls if I had NN's fanny to lick...unconditional licking..well..unless its fishy..then I'll use a nose clothespeg

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By *oward1978 OP Man over a year ago

Rotherham

My sister has had bf all her life Howi, I'd rather be single than having to go through heartache she has for everyone bar this recent one. And he isn't her true love! "

That's it. I'm an all or nothing kind of guy. I'm not interested in just going through the motions. You see a lot of people who seem to just like pretending they're in love. Like if they try hard enough it may happen. I agree with you. I couldn't be doing with the heartache and the ball ache. I'm holding out for the big one.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

hope that makes sense..

It makes absolute sense to me. I think the love for pets is grossly underestimated.

I love my dogs more than my family the only people who come before my dogs are my children every body else takes a back seat

my dogs are the only things that love me unconditionally and are always happy to see me, nobody else has even given me that

It's a (slightly depressing) fact that I loved my cat way more than I've ever loved a woman.

It's not

partners come and go

pets are loyal for ever

no man has never made me feel like that, when I was married and I'd had a shit day at work I'd just walk into abuse, give me a dog over that anyday

I understand totally what you're saying. They do love you unconditionally.

I wouldnt ber licking my balls if I had NN's fanny to lick...unconditional licking..well..unless its fishy..then I'll use a nose clothespeg

fishy? it smells like a kipper factory down there

best bring two pegs

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

hope that makes sense..

It makes absolute sense to me. I think the love for pets is grossly underestimated.

I love my dogs more than my family the only people who come before my dogs are my children every body else takes a back seat

my dogs are the only things that love me unconditionally and are always happy to see me, nobody else has even given me that

It's a (slightly depressing) fact that I loved my cat way more than I've ever loved a woman.

It's not

partners come and go

pets are loyal for ever

no man has never made me feel like that, when I was married and I'd had a shit day at work I'd just walk into abuse, give me a dog over that anyday

I understand totally what you're saying. They do love you unconditionally.

I wouldnt ber licking my balls if I had NN's fanny to lick...unconditional licking..well..unless its fishy..then I'll use a nose clothespeg

fishy? it smells like a kipper factory down there

best bring two pegs

new profile name coming up

kipperlicker

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By *icecouple561Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

My sister has had bf all her life Howi, I'd rather be single than having to go through heartache she has for everyone bar this recent one. And he isn't her true love!

Do you think you'll know immediately? I know some people do.

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By *aucy tiggerWoman over a year ago

Back where I belong

"Nope. Never had the heart stopping brain fuddling 'wow, I'd die for you' kind of love I've heard about.

I don't think I could cope actually. All a bit intense for me.

Same here. Never had that. I really feel I'm missing out on something

I was married for almost 30 years and loved my husband, but I have recently fallen, hook, line and sinker and its so different from the first time - this is more intense and hurts like hell. But I wouldn't change it.

Love comes on many different forms and guises. And sometimes you may not even realise it!

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By *oward1978 OP Man over a year ago

Rotherham

My sister has had bf all her life Howi, I'd rather be single than having to go through heartache she has for everyone bar this recent one. And he isn't her true love!

Do you think you'll know immediately? I know some people do."

I don't know about immediately but I don't think it would take me too long to work out if we were truly compatible or not.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I don't seek it, I have no need for it, no desire for it and I feel free of it.

I do enjoy watching others who are so happy with each other, I find it moving.

I also find it so sad if I see a couple in a restaurant who look so unhappy, disconnected from each other and they can't even think of things to say.

I'm always very envious of loved up couples. Though it is nice to see.

Its something that will happen when you least expect. A chance meeting, a simple look will be all it takes.

I met my wife somewhere we'd both been a million times, she walked past me & from the look in her eyes, I knew there was something there. Over the course of a week, I'd pass her in the street, that look still in her eyes so, eventually, I parked my truck & jumped out, asked for her number & the rest is history! I couldnt imagine life without her.

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By *risky_MareWoman over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"I don't seek it, I have no need for it, no desire for it and I feel free of it.

I do enjoy watching others who are so happy with each other, I find it moving.

I also find it so sad if I see a couple in a restaurant who look so unhappy, disconnected from each other and they can't even think of things to say.

I'm always very envious of loved up couples. Though it is nice to see.

Its something that will happen when you least expect. A chance meeting, a simple look will be all it takes.

Aw how sweet!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

My sister has had bf all her life Howi, I'd rather be single than having to go through heartache she has for everyone bar this recent one. And he isn't her true love!

Do you think you'll know immediately? I know some people do."

I did 20 years ago and it's exactly the same feeling now (with the same person)

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Been there... Done that... Got ripped to shreds each time

I'm afraid it's turned me into a bitter old cynic who thinks he'll never find it again... And with that attitude it'll probably be a self fulfilling prophecy

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I don't seek it, I have no need for it, no desire for it and I feel free of it.

I do enjoy watching others who are so happy with each other, I find it moving.

I also find it so sad if I see a couple in a restaurant who look so unhappy, disconnected from each other and they can't even think of things to say.

That was me and my ex when he decided to woo me back,after he realised he had lost me. I thought I loved him,I still don't know if I did,but I didn't want to be sitting there pretending to be happy.

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By *sianmale89Man over a year ago

Stockport

"Been there... Done that... Got ripped to shreds each time

I'm afraid it's turned me into a bitter old cynic who thinks he'll never find it again... And with that attitude it'll probably be a self fulfilling prophecy

shit happens in life, if you get with some one again and have a relationship then good on you...

if not then fuck it life is what it is just focus on you're own survival and you're families too, so you go to sleep by yourself and don't have some one to wake up to in the morning to make you smile?

far more bigger worries in life at times mate.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Once. Still am.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I think it's right place at right time! By the age of 17 I had been in love twice....full on fallen in love and at such a young age nobody thought my boyfriend and I would last as I was only 16 but 19 years later we are more in love than ever!! Xx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Once, and still love him dearly, just situation means it's a no go x

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