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A loved one farting :(
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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How do you cope knowing, having heard, having smelled a loved one farting. Maybe the love of you life? Does it _educe the love you have for them? How can something so smelly come from someone so beautiful you think?!?!?
I can barely got of the farct that all human beings do it  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How do you cope knowing, having heard, having smelled a loved one farting. Maybe the love of you life? Does it _educe the love you have for them? How can something so smelly come from someone so beautiful you think?!?!?
I can barely got of the farct that all human beings do it "
Weird as it sounds, I feel very similarly about this. I've thought about it many a time, and I think it may actually be down to me, in that I can idealise people so much, that I neglect to think about their standard, human habits, and as a result, even such simple human things such as farting can shatter those illusions I've put so much love into.
My advice would be, learn to accept that nobody's perfect, and true love comes with accepting someone as a whole, real world package.
...unless of course, we're talking flying face farts, anyone who does that never really loved you anyway  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Oh for the love of god if you can't fart in front of a love one or whatever!! Better out then in that's what I say!!
It's like shitting in a public toilet why is it so frowned upon?! Everyone has to do it!! (However a use the disabled now and again if I have a bad bowel problem!) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yeah. I'm filing my divorce papers at lunch. 
-Courtney"
After drinking pints of I presume cider, I reckon Marc probably filed his first thing this morning   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Oh for the love of god if you can't fart in front of a love one or whatever!! Better out then in that's what I say!!
It's like shitting in a public toilet why is it so frowned upon?! Everyone has to do it!! (However a use the disabled now and again if I have a bad bowel problem!) "
Why would you use a disabled toilet if you have bowel problems? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Oh for the love of god if you can't fart in front of a love one or whatever!! Better out then in that's what I say!!
It's like shitting in a public toilet why is it so frowned upon?! Everyone has to do it!! (However a use the disabled now and again if I have a bad bowel problem!)
Why would you use a disabled toilet if you have bowel problems?"
To be quite open and honest about it, it stinks and well quite loud at times, the hand dryer doesn't always cut it! DISCLAIMER: I only use them if their quite and no one about |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yeah. I'm filing my divorce papers at lunch.
-Courtney
After drinking pints of I presume cider, I reckon Marc probably filed his first thing this morning "
 Be quiet you! Divorce is a personal thing.
-Courtney |
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It's just a fart. Nothing to get upset about. There's worse things in life.
Would it be wrong (weird) for someone to say they quite like the idea of a woman farting?...Yes, I thought so. Just thought I'd ask the question  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's just a fart. Nothing to get upset about. There's worse things in life.
Would it be wrong (weird) for someone to say they quite like the idea of a woman farting?...Yes, I thought so. Just thought I'd ask the question "
I love the fact you are so quirky about things  |
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"It's a natural thing
I fart, you fart, we all fart.
Just light a match.
Now if a woman farted when I was giving her oral, that'd be different"
I did that once... not deliberately but it was funny |
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"It's just a fart. Nothing to get upset about. There's worse things in life.
Would it be wrong (weird) for someone to say they quite like the idea of a woman farting?...Yes, I thought so. Just thought I'd ask the question
I love the fact you are so quirky about things "
Thank you Miss I  Quirky eh?! I think other people may use different words to describe my 'interests'! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's a natural thing
I fart, you fart, we all fart.
Just light a match.
Now if a woman farted when I was giving her oral, that'd be different
I did that once... not deliberately but it was funny "
For you. Probably not who was giving.
Although, I'm guessing you were really relaxed and it happened.
I've been close when getting oral.
Not done it yet.*touch wood* |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My husband once did one so bad that my instinct was to call him a Fucking prick!! Hardly grounds for divorce, but inc_edibly close! It's now my default thing to say when they are bad.
I do find it amusing that people are uptight about things like farting though. |
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Really?
Wow!
I don't care about that stuff. If I love someone I love someone. I don't think bodily functions are a deal breaker. I'm not saying come in and have a shit while I'm in the bath but if you've gotta go then you've gotta go.
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"It's a natural thing
I fart, you fart, we all fart.
Just light a match.
Now if a woman farted when I was giving her oral, that'd be different
I did that once... not deliberately but it was funny
For you. Probably not who was giving.
Although, I'm guessing you were really relaxed and it happened.
I've been close when getting oral.
Not done it yet.*touch wood*"
He found it funny too xD |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Really?
Wow!
I don't care about that stuff. If I love someone I love someone. I don't think bodily functions are a deal breaker. I'm not saying come in and have a shit while I'm in the bath but if you've gotta go then you've gotta go.
"
I don't care, either. I was being facetious.
-Courtney |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's a natural thing
I fart, you fart, we all fart.
Just light a match.
Now if a woman farted when I was giving her oral, that'd be different
I did that once... not deliberately but it was funny
For you. Probably not who was giving.
Although, I'm guessing you were really relaxed and it happened.
I've been close when getting oral.
Not done it yet.*touch wood*
He found it funny too xD "
tbh, I probably would've too.
And I'd plot my revenge for sure |
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"Really?
Wow!
I don't care about that stuff. If I love someone I love someone. I don't think bodily functions are a deal breaker. I'm not saying come in and have a shit while I'm in the bath but if you've gotta go then you've gotta go.
I don't care, either. I was being facetious.
-Courtney"
I know... I was answering the OP! |
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"It's a natural thing
I fart, you fart, we all fart.
Just light a match.
Now if a woman farted when I was giving her oral, that'd be different
I did that once... not deliberately but it was funny
For you. Probably not who was giving.
Although, I'm guessing you were really relaxed and it happened.
I've been close when getting oral.
Not done it yet.*touch wood*
He found it funny too xD
tbh, I probably would've too.
And I'd plot my revenge for sure "
He got his revenge by pushing me down a muddy hill... but really the only person it affected was him because his mum made him do the washing while she ran me a hot bath 
The moral of the story... I have no idea but it was all pretty funny |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"It's a natural thing
I fart, you fart, we all fart.
Just light a match.
Now if a woman farted when I was giving her oral, that'd be different
I did that once... not deliberately but it was funny
For you. Probably not who was giving.
Although, I'm guessing you were really relaxed and it happened.
I've been close when getting oral.
Not done it yet.*touch wood*
He found it funny too xD
tbh, I probably would've too.
And I'd plot my revenge for sure
He got his revenge by pushing me down a muddy hill... but really the only person it affected was him because his mum made him do the washing while she ran me a hot bath
The moral of the story... I have no idea but it was all pretty funny "
That's just mean. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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What follows is a link to an apt, and highly amusing video that you will enjoy. Please copy and paste it into the address bar of your favorite web browser.
https://youtu.be/S_YDmIq0cyg
And enjoy. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I like to wait untill we're all snug, then fart on their leg and you get that 'parrrrrp' sound
Best pray you dont leave a little brown butterfly on their thigh though |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I accidentally farted on my partner when I laughed during spooning. He said he'd never be able to look at me the same way. 
It's natural and can't be avoided, I only ask he leaves the room to do it when it smells like his guts are dying. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You should embrace the situation and have a farting competition, you never know you may have fun and win too "
Sounds like the duelling farts skit family guy did!
But the loser could end up need fresh undies lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Well we all do it and some more than others due to medical conditions such as I B S and a like but it can't be helped.
If someone feels comfortable in a relationship a fart should not cause a problem lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My ex loved one would walk ahead of me in an empty Asda aisle and fart. Unaware,I would walk through a mist of rotting flesh/bad eggs and almost throw up. By this time he had disappea_ed around the end of the aisle,leaving me with the evidence for people coming up behind me to point the finger at.
I would like to add that my little poofs rarely smell. I think it's because I drink a lot of tea and don't eat a lot of meat. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My ex loved one would walk ahead of me in an empty Asda aisle and fart. Unaware,I would walk through a mist of rotting flesh/bad eggs and almost throw up. By this time he had disappea_ed around the end of the aisle,leaving me with the evidence for people coming up behind me to point the finger at.
I would like to add that my little poofs rarely smell. I think it's because I drink a lot of tea and don't eat a lot of meat. "
Ahh, the old 'gas claymore'
Wise man.....
And does tea filter farts?...I'd love if it did.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My ex loved one would walk ahead of me in an empty Asda aisle and fart. Unaware,I would walk through a mist of rotting flesh/bad eggs and almost throw up. By this time he had disappea_ed around the end of the aisle,leaving me with the evidence for people coming up behind me to point the finger at.
I would like to add that my little poofs rarely smell. I think it's because I drink a lot of tea and don't eat a lot of meat.
Ahh, the old 'gas claymore'
Wise man.....
And does tea filter farts?...I'd love if it did...."
I think tea produces wind but not of the smelly kind. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My ex never heard me fart, I always left the room, I suppose it was the way I was bough up, as a child we would get a slap if we farted in public, we was told to go and do it privately and that's something I've always done, my ex used to think I was nuts when I'd go to the bathroom every time I broke wind but its just something I've always done because I was made to from a very young age |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How do you cope knowing, having heard, having smelled a loved one farting. Maybe the love of you life? Does it _educe the love you have for them? How can something so smelly come from someone so beautiful you think?!?!?
I can barely got of the farct that all human beings do it "
We both roll about laughing at each others anal trumpeting. The louder the funnier. If it stinks waft it at them. The look on their face if its unexpected is funnier still |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Och we can fart, burp and throw up in front of each other. Not all at the same time though. And we don't make a regular occurrance of it. But we are human. We eat curry. Sometimes they just sneak out.
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When I met my partner he had never farted in front of anyone, soon brought him down to my level and he wins the farting competions.
Would draw the line at farting on a first date though, to me its just a sign of being comfortable around someone |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Really?
Wow!
I don't care about that stuff. If I love someone I love someone. I don't think bodily functions are a deal breaker. I'm not saying come in and have a shit while I'm in the bath but if you've gotta go then you've gotta go.
"
Same here! Except I have been through the having someone coming in and having a shit while I'm in the bath while in a 1 toilet household Hooray for the downstairs toilet |
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"My ex never heard me fart, I always left the room, I suppose it was the way I was bough up, as a child we would get a slap if we farted in public, we was told to go and do it privately and that's something I've always done, my ex used to think I was nuts when I'd go to the bathroom every time I broke wind but its just something I've always done because I was made to from a very young age "
Yep that sounds like me. To this day I try not to fart in front of others.
Him |
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"How do you cope knowing, having heard, having smelled a loved one farting. Maybe the love of you life? Does it _educe the love you have for them? How can something so smelly come from someone so beautiful you think?!?!?
I can barely got of the farct that all human beings do it "
It's best to fall in love with the a actual person rather than a sanitised ideal |
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You're a sensitive soul aren't you? 
Doll x