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Disposal
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Many Christmases ago A bought me a huge and I mean ENORMOUS dildo as a joke present. I've just unpacked it and really have no idea what to do with it...quiet at the back.....I can't just put it in the recycling, can I?
Suggestions welcome. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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For my 30th birthday my friends bought me a huuuuuuge rubber dildo taking the loss about how I like big dicks. It stinks of rubber and now it's in my bedside drawer along with hairspray and a lighter. My weapons of choice should an intruder ever break in, hairspray and lighter to the face for home made flame thrower and massive 18 inch long thick rubber dildo to club someone with. |
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"For my 30th birthday my friends bought me a huuuuuuge rubber dildo taking the loss about how I like big dicks. It stinks of rubber and now it's in my bedside drawer along with hairspray and a lighter. My weapons of choice should an intruder ever break in, hairspray and lighter to the face for home made flame thrower and massive 18 inch long thick rubber dildo to club someone with. "
I like that idea, I might keep it in the car as self defence. |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
Why didn't you lose it in the move?
Complain to the removal company that they gave you a box with someone else's stuff. You need to put other things in a box and return to them to find the rightful owner.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"For my 30th birthday my friends bought me a huuuuuuge rubber dildo taking the loss about how I like big dicks. It stinks of rubber and now it's in my bedside drawer along with hairspray and a lighter. My weapons of choice should an intruder ever break in, hairspray and lighter to the face for home made flame thrower and massive 18 inch long thick rubber dildo to club someone with. "
This made me laugh, I pity the poor person who breaks in |
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"Someone bought me a GIANT dildo and I just threw it in the bin in the street. At night when there was zero chance of being caught with said GIANT black dildo in the shape of a gun!! "
So DG what size was it? ......Giant? |
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"Why didn't you lose it in the move?
Complain to the removal company that they gave you a box with someone else's stuff. You need to put other things in a box and return to them to find the rightful owner.
"
Devious and cunning....I like it! |
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"Chuck it in someone else's recycling.
I might do that.
which neighbours don't u like? Just leave it right at the top of their pile of recycling. lol"
Only just moved in, we aren't sufficiently fed up with any of them yet |
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"WI raffle?
That or I was thinking of donating it to Help the Aged.
Disguise it in a tin of biscuits or something."
There is no tin of biscuits large enough. Maybe I could incorporate it into a showstopper bake a la Great British Bake Off........what would Paul and Mary say? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"For my 30th birthday my friends bought me a huuuuuuge rubber dildo taking the loss about how I like big dicks. It stinks of rubber and now it's in my bedside drawer along with hairspray and a lighter. My weapons of choice should an intruder ever break in, hairspray and lighter to the face for home made flame thrower and massive 18 inch long thick rubber dildo to club someone with.
I like that idea, I might keep it in the car as self defence. "
I would definitely keep it as a self defence weapon, it would give someone a hefty smack plus you won't get into trouble with police because you haven't taken a weapon (knife/baseball bat) with you with the intention to use it. |
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"For my 30th birthday my friends bought me a huuuuuuge rubber dildo taking the loss about how I like big dicks. It stinks of rubber and now it's in my bedside drawer along with hairspray and a lighter. My weapons of choice should an intruder ever break in, hairspray and lighter to the face for home made flame thrower and massive 18 inch long thick rubber dildo to club someone with.
I like that idea, I might keep it in the car as self defence.
I would definitely keep it as a self defence weapon, it would give someone a hefty smack plus you won't get into trouble with police because you haven't taken a weapon (knife/baseball bat) with you with the intention to use it. "
My thoughts exactly although I'm not sure how I'd explain it to my mum |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"WI raffle?
That or I was thinking of donating it to Help the Aged.
Disguise it in a tin of biscuits or something.
There is no tin of biscuits large enough. Maybe I could incorporate it into a showstopper bake a la Great British Bake Off........what would Paul and Mary say? "
That's a lot of cake!
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"Someone bought me a GIANT dildo and I just threw it in the bin in the street. At night when there was zero chance of being caught with said GIANT black dildo in the shape of a gun!!
So DG what size was it? ......Giant? "
Probably about 12 inches... in diameter!
About a foot and a half long with a trigger!! Only a bloke would buy such a monstrously HUGE dildo! |
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By *uby0000Woman
over a year ago
hertfordshire |
many years ago I bagged mine up in a closed bag to go to the dump my hubby got the wrong bag and took it to our local charity shop!!!! next day they were closed often wonder why lol
go to the dump and askthem which bin to put them in hehe |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Just got an advert through the door for the local Church jumble sale
I'll send it up to you then.....problem solved!"
Just send it straight to the Vicar - cut out the middle man. I'll PM the address |
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"Someone bought me a GIANT dildo and I just threw it in the bin in the street. At night when there was zero chance of being caught with said GIANT black dildo in the shape of a gun!!
So DG what size was it? ......Giant?
Probably about 12 inches... in diameter!
About a foot and a half long with a trigger!! Only a bloke would buy such a monstrously HUGE dildo! "
I'm thinking the person who bought it should use it |
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"many years ago I bagged mine up in a closed bag to go to the dump my hubby got the wrong bag and took it to our local charity shop!!!! next day they were closed often wonder why lol
go to the dump and askthem which bin to put them in hehe"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Someone bought me a GIANT dildo and I just threw it in the bin in the street. At night when there was zero chance of being caught with said GIANT black dildo in the shape of a gun!!
So DG what size was it? ......Giant?
Probably about 12 inches... in diameter!
About a foot and a half long with a trigger!! Only a bloke would buy such a monstrously HUGE dildo! "
Why would they even MAKE that?!? |
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"Just got an advert through the door for the local Church jumble sale
I'll send it up to you then.....problem solved!
Just send it straight to the Vicar - cut out the middle man. I'll PM the address "
It would give him something to put under his cassock |
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By *edMan
over a year ago
cambridgeshire |
"Many Christmases ago A bought me a huge and I mean ENORMOUS dildo as a joke present. I've just unpacked it and really have no idea what to do with it...quiet at the back.....I can't just put it in the recycling, can I?
Suggestions welcome."
Paint it green and chuck it in someone's vegetable patch |
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"Many Christmases ago A bought me a huge and I mean ENORMOUS dildo as a joke present. I've just unpacked it and really have no idea what to do with it...quiet at the back.....I can't just put it in the recycling, can I?
Suggestions welcome.
Paint it green and chuck it in someone's vegetable patch"
Is that a hideous euphemism? |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Someone bought me a GIANT dildo and I just threw it in the bin in the street. At night when there was zero chance of being caught with said GIANT black dildo in the shape of a gun!!
So DG what size was it? ......Giant?
Probably about 12 inches... in diameter!
About a foot and a half long with a trigger!! Only a bloke would buy such a monstrously HUGE dildo!
Why would they even MAKE that?!?"
I have a friend who makes them... you can get even bigger ones. |
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My little old lady friend™ caused ructions at the post office when she was shipping off a pressie to a friend.
LOLF was asked if the package contained electrical items, which is did.
When asked, for security reasons, what was in the package my little old lady friend replied:
"It's sex toys, since you asked."
She's 73 years young.
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Someone bought me a GIANT dildo and I just threw it in the bin in the street. At night when there was zero chance of being caught with said GIANT black dildo in the shape of a gun!!
So DG what size was it? ......Giant?
Probably about 12 inches... in diameter!
About a foot and a half long with a trigger!! Only a bloke would buy such a monstrously HUGE dildo!
Why would they even MAKE that?!?
I have a friend who makes them... you can get even bigger ones."
Yes, but why? |
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By *ty31Man
over a year ago
NW London |
Some suggestions;
Threaten to use it on the next person who sends you a rude message on here.
Take up baseball
Go trick or treating this halloween and take it as your trick
Paint it white, add a nose and some eyes- one snowman without the snow |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Just got an advert through the door for the local Church jumble sale
I'll send it up to you then.....problem solved!
Just send it straight to the Vicar - cut out the middle man. I'll PM the address
It would give him something to put under his cassock "
Aye new film being made 'Carry on up the Cassock' |
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"My little old lady friend™ caused ructions at the post office when she was shipping off a pressie to a friend.
LOLF was asked if the package contained electrical items, which is did.
When asked, for security reasons, what was in the package my little old lady friend replied:
"It's sex toys, since you asked."
She's 73 years young.
"
Being closer to 73 than 23 I am heartened by that. I think I said before little old ladies are only little old ladies on the outside, on the inside they're 30 year old ravers |
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"Someone bought me a GIANT dildo and I just threw it in the bin in the street. At night when there was zero chance of being caught with said GIANT black dildo in the shape of a gun!!
So DG what size was it? ......Giant?
Probably about 12 inches... in diameter!
About a foot and a half long with a trigger!! Only a bloke would buy such a monstrously HUGE dildo!
Why would they even MAKE that?!?
I have a friend who makes them... you can get even bigger ones.
Yes, but why?"
For a joke gift |
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"Someone bought me a GIANT dildo and I just threw it in the bin in the street. At night when there was zero chance of being caught with said GIANT black dildo in the shape of a gun!!
So DG what size was it? ......Giant?
Probably about 12 inches... in diameter!
About a foot and a half long with a trigger!! Only a bloke would buy such a monstrously HUGE dildo!
Why would they even MAKE that?!?
I have a friend who makes them... you can get even bigger ones.
Yes, but why?"
Yeah this!!
I wish I'd kept a photo of it. Beyond ridiculous! |
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True story. The giant dildo and assorted accessories were laying on the floor while we ponde_ed on their fate when somebody knocked on the door........cue hasty shoving of said apparatus into a suitcase |
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"True story. The giant dildo and assorted accessories were laying on the floor while we ponde_ed on their fate when somebody knocked on the door........cue hasty shoving of said apparatus into a suitcase "
Save one for when the Jehovah Witnesses come knocking and answer the door with it in your hand.
(other religious people are available) |
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"True story. The giant dildo and assorted accessories were laying on the floor while we ponde_ed on their fate when somebody knocked on the door........cue hasty shoving of said apparatus into a suitcase
Save one for when the Jehovah Witnesses come knocking and answer the door with it in your hand.
(other religious people are available) "
Tempting, very tempting. |
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By *ty31Man
over a year ago
NW London |
I once got asked by a mate's girlfriend to take some rubbish bags down to the tip whilst they were moving house. We called in to the dump on the way to drop the van back off, I took out the first bag and the bloke asked us if it had anything electrical inside. As I was about to answer the bag split open and her old "little friend" fell out at our feet. She was pretty mortified to say the least.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"True story. The giant dildo and assorted accessories were laying on the floor while we ponde_ed on their fate when somebody knocked on the door........cue hasty shoving of said apparatus into a suitcase "
Send it on a long holiday |
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"I once got asked by a mate's girlfriend to take some rubbish bags down to the tip whilst they were moving house. We called in to the dump on the way to drop the van back off, I took out the first bag and the bloke asked us if it had anything electrical inside. As I was about to answer the bag split open and her old "little friend" fell out at our feet. She was pretty mortified to say the least...."
Eek. I heard tell that a plane made an emergency landing because a woman's vibrator was buzzing in her bag and they thought it was a bomb. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Many Christmases ago A bought me a huge and I mean ENORMOUS dildo as a joke present. I've just unpacked it and really have no idea what to do with it...quiet at the back.....I can't just put it in the recycling, can I?
Suggestions welcome."
Joke present. Mmmm hhmmmm |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Chuck it in someone else's recycling.
I might do that.
which neighbours don't u like? Just leave it right at the top of their pile of recycling. lol
Only just moved in, we aren't sufficiently fed up with any of them yet "
Give it time....... |
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"Many Christmases ago A bought me a huge and I mean ENORMOUS dildo as a joke present. I've just unpacked it and really have no idea what to do with it...quiet at the back.....I can't just put it in the recycling, can I?
Suggestions welcome.
Joke present. Mmmm hhmmmm "
honest |
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"Chuck it in someone else's recycling.
I might do that.
which neighbours don't u like? Just leave it right at the top of their pile of recycling. lol
Only just moved in, we aren't sufficiently fed up with any of them yet
Give it time....... "
More a case of giving them time I feel |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Chuck it in someone else's recycling.
I might do that.
which neighbours don't u like? Just leave it right at the top of their pile of recycling. lol
Only just moved in, we aren't sufficiently fed up with any of them yet
Give it time.......
More a case of giving them time I feel "
Just don't make too much noise when you're, ahem, "at home". |
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Plenty of threads from first time male anal virgins - they'll soon loosen up with it. And starting big means you never look back (seeing your rear split in two is a disincentive). It could soon be snapped up, if promoted properly. |
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"Chuck it in someone else's recycling.
I might do that.
which neighbours don't u like? Just leave it right at the top of their pile of recycling. lol
Only just moved in, we aren't sufficiently fed up with any of them yet
Give it time.......
More a case of giving them time I feel
Just don't make too much noise when you're, ahem, "at home". "
Who? Moi, the very epitomy of silent when Mr N takes a leather paddle to my bottom |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Chuck it in someone else's recycling.
I might do that.
which neighbours don't u like? Just leave it right at the top of their pile of recycling. lol
Only just moved in, we aren't sufficiently fed up with any of them yet
Give it time.......
More a case of giving them time I feel "
Thinking about it, when you move somewhere new don't you invite the neighbours round and exchange gifts to get to know them?
Perfect opportunity to get rid of something, if you know what I mean. |
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"Plenty of threads from first time male anal virgins - they'll soon loosen up with it. And starting big means you never look back (seeing your rear split in two is a disincentive). It could soon be snapped up, if promoted properly."
You're right! I should be viewing this as an opportunity not a problem |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Chuck it in someone else's recycling.
I might do that.
which neighbours don't u like? Just leave it right at the top of their pile of recycling. lol
Only just moved in, we aren't sufficiently fed up with any of them yet
Give it time.......
More a case of giving them time I feel
Just don't make too much noise when you're, ahem, "at home".
Who? Moi, the very epitomy of silent when Mr N takes a leather paddle to my bottom "
Gulps...... |
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"Chuck it in someone else's recycling.
I might do that.
which neighbours don't u like? Just leave it right at the top of their pile of recycling. lol
Only just moved in, we aren't sufficiently fed up with any of them yet
Give it time.......
More a case of giving them time I feel
Thinking about it, when you move somewhere new don't you invite the neighbours round and exchange gifts to get to know them?
Perfect opportunity to get rid of something, if you know what I mean. "
Dear Lord! I'm trying to give them the right impression not the correct one |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If you want i could have a chat with the lads on site and see if they can put it through a chipper for you how many of us does it need to be carried away |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Chuck it in someone else's recycling.
I might do that.
which neighbours don't u like? Just leave it right at the top of their pile of recycling. lol
Only just moved in, we aren't sufficiently fed up with any of them yet
Give it time.......
More a case of giving them time I feel
Thinking about it, when you move somewhere new don't you invite the neighbours round and exchange gifts to get to know them?
Perfect opportunity to get rid of something, if you know what I mean.
Dear Lord! I'm trying to give them the right impression not the correct one "
Reminds of when the mother of an ex girlfriend found her vibratory.
The embarrassed ex tried explain that it could be used to massage the back.
"Oh God no" said mum innocently and without thinking, "I could never use it on my back"
Much mirth ensued... |
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By *edMan
over a year ago
cambridgeshire |
"Many Christmases ago A bought me a huge and I mean ENORMOUS dildo as a joke present. I've just unpacked it and really have no idea what to do with it...quiet at the back.....I can't just put it in the recycling, can I?
Suggestions welcome.
Paint it green and chuck it in someone's vegetable patch
Is that a hideous euphemism? "
Ummm yes, but only because I thought of it as I pressed send
So, congrats, your mind is like mine. People that know me would sorry for you lol |
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"I've had my toothbrush buzzing as my bag went round the conveyor belt in the airport. I made a proper show of getting it out my case.
You know you can get "special" attachments for them right? "
For your toothbrush?!!
Wtf? Why would someone even think of that?! |
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"Many Christmases ago A bought me a huge and I mean ENORMOUS dildo as a joke present. I've just unpacked it and really have no idea what to do with it...quiet at the back.....I can't just put it in the recycling, can I?
Suggestions welcome.
Paint it green and chuck it in someone's vegetable patch
Is that a hideous euphemism?
Ummm yes, but only because I thought of it as I pressed send
So, congrats, your mind is like mine. People that know me would sorry for you lol"
Lol I find it all very amusing |
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"I've had my toothbrush buzzing as my bag went round the conveyor belt in the airport. I made a proper show of getting it out my case.
You know you can get "special" attachments for them right?
For your toothbrush?!!
Wtf? Why would someone even think of that?! "
Yes, for your toothbrush. If you don't want to use the same toothbrush for both purposes simply use your partners for the "special" attachment, it's the least they can do |
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By *ezebelWoman
over a year ago
North of The Wall - youll need your vest |
"For my 30th birthday my friends bought me a huuuuuuge rubber dildo taking the loss about how I like big dicks. It stinks of rubber and now it's in my bedside drawer along with hairspray and a lighter. My weapons of choice should an intruder ever break in, hairspray and lighter to the face for home made flame thrower and massive 18 inch long thick rubber dildo to club someone with. "
And I genuinely have just snorted coffee up my nose reading that |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"attach something to the tip and use it as a back scratcher
But whose back should I scratch? The size of this thing I could reach the bloke at the end of the street "
Well that's one way to get to know the new neighbours. |
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By *b586Couple
over a year ago
pemberton twp |
Toss it into a friends car as a joke.
Leave it on public transpirtation.
Great coffee table conversation piece- set on a friends table during a party, of corse.
I love everyone else's suggestions. |
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"Toss it into a friends car as a joke.
Leave it on public transpirtation.
Great coffee table conversation piece- set on a friends table during a party, of corse.
I love everyone else's suggestions. "
|
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"Toss it into a friends car as a joke.
Leave it on public transpirtation.
Great coffee table conversation piece- set on a friends table during a party, of corse.
I love everyone else's suggestions. "
Oh that's a fabulous idea... the story would be even better if it was brought back to you via the CCTV! |
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"Toss it into a friends car as a joke.
Leave it on public transpirtation.
Great coffee table conversation piece- set on a friends table during a party, of corse.
I love everyone else's suggestions.
Oh that's a fabulous idea... the story would be even better if it was brought back to you via the CCTV! "
Boomerang dildo |
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"Toss it into a friends car as a joke.
Leave it on public transpirtation.
Great coffee table conversation piece- set on a friends table during a party, of corse.
I love everyone else's suggestions.
Oh that's a fabulous idea... the story would be even better if it was brought back to you via the CCTV!
Boomerang dildo "
You have to do it!!
How funny would that be! Lost property anyone
Anyone?!! |
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"Toss it into a friends car as a joke.
Leave it on public transpirtation.
Great coffee table conversation piece- set on a friends table during a party, of corse.
I love everyone else's suggestions.
Oh that's a fabulous idea... the story would be even better if it was brought back to you via the CCTV!
Boomerang dildo
You have to do it!!
How funny would that be! Lost property anyone
Anyone?!! "
No, just NO. We all know the footage would end up on YouTube and Facebook |
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"Haven't you got rid of it yet?
"
No it's in a suitcase with some other ill thought out purchases of the sex toy kind and a couple of dodgy videos. It'll stay in this loft now and probably be found by our inc_edulous off spring after we die. . I can imagine their faces. |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Haven't you got rid of it yet?
No it's in a suitcase with some other ill thought out purchases of the sex toy kind and a couple of dodgy videos. It'll stay in this loft now and probably be found by our inc_edulous off spring after we die. . I can imagine their faces."
It's worth keeping just for that reason. Perhaps leave them a little note that will leave them pondering.
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"Haven't you got rid of it yet?
No it's in a suitcase with some other ill thought out purchases of the sex toy kind and a couple of dodgy videos. It'll stay in this loft now and probably be found by our inc_edulous off spring after we die. . I can imagine their faces.
It's worth keeping just for that reason. Perhaps leave them a little note that will leave them pondering.
"
What with that, our "private" photo album and collection of bondage gear, spanking equipment and dressing up box I think they'll be pondering for quite some time |
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"Haven't you got rid of it yet?
No it's in a suitcase with some other ill thought out purchases of the sex toy kind and a couple of dodgy videos. It'll stay in this loft now and probably be found by our inc_edulous off spring after we die. . I can imagine their faces.
It's worth keeping just for that reason. Perhaps leave them a little note that will leave them pondering.
What with that, our "private" photo album and collection of bondage gear, spanking equipment and dressing up box I think they'll be pondering for quite some time "
I'd skip the pics... there are some things you can't unsee but I'm totally with Lickety... if you won't leave it on the bus, leave it somewhere super random, like the bottom of the chest freezer. |
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"Haven't you got rid of it yet?
No it's in a suitcase with some other ill thought out purchases of the sex toy kind and a couple of dodgy videos. It'll stay in this loft now and probably be found by our inc_edulous off spring after we die. . I can imagine their faces.
It's worth keeping just for that reason. Perhaps leave them a little note that will leave them pondering.
What with that, our "private" photo album and collection of bondage gear, spanking equipment and dressing up box I think they'll be pondering for quite some time
I'd skip the pics... there are some things you can't unsee but I'm totally with Lickety... if you won't leave it on the bus, leave it somewhere super random, like the bottom of the chest freezer. "
On the grounds that I have no idea when I'm going to die or according to some, if, would you be my sex picture buddy? On hearing the sad news of my demise you nip round, smash the hard drive on my pc and lap top, destroy the framed photos and the pictures in the album, I'll do the same for you. |
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"Haven't you got rid of it yet?
No it's in a suitcase with some other ill thought out purchases of the sex toy kind and a couple of dodgy videos. It'll stay in this loft now and probably be found by our inc_edulous off spring after we die. . I can imagine their faces.
It's worth keeping just for that reason. Perhaps leave them a little note that will leave them pondering.
What with that, our "private" photo album and collection of bondage gear, spanking equipment and dressing up box I think they'll be pondering for quite some time
I'd skip the pics... there are some things you can't unsee but I'm totally with Lickety... if you won't leave it on the bus, leave it somewhere super random, like the bottom of the chest freezer.
On the grounds that I have no idea when I'm going to die or according to some, if, would you be my sex picture buddy? On hearing the sad news of my demise you nip round, smash the hard drive on my pc and lap top, destroy the framed photos and the pictures in the album, I'll do the same for you. "
Do I look stupid? My brother already has keys and strict instructions written in my book of death. |
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"Haven't you got rid of it yet?
No it's in a suitcase with some other ill thought out purchases of the sex toy kind and a couple of dodgy videos. It'll stay in this loft now and probably be found by our inc_edulous off spring after we die. . I can imagine their faces.
It's worth keeping just for that reason. Perhaps leave them a little note that will leave them pondering.
What with that, our "private" photo album and collection of bondage gear, spanking equipment and dressing up box I think they'll be pondering for quite some time
I'd skip the pics... there are some things you can't unsee but I'm totally with Lickety... if you won't leave it on the bus, leave it somewhere super random, like the bottom of the chest freezer.
On the grounds that I have no idea when I'm going to die or according to some, if, would you be my sex picture buddy? On hearing the sad news of my demise you nip round, smash the hard drive on my pc and lap top, destroy the framed photos and the pictures in the album, I'll do the same for you.
Do I look stupid? My brother already has keys and strict instructions written in my book of death. "
In answer to your first question, I couldn't possibly say . You're a wise woman DG a wise woman. |
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"Haven't you got rid of it yet?
No it's in a suitcase with some other ill thought out purchases of the sex toy kind and a couple of dodgy videos. It'll stay in this loft now and probably be found by our inc_edulous off spring after we die. . I can imagine their faces.
It's worth keeping just for that reason. Perhaps leave them a little note that will leave them pondering.
What with that, our "private" photo album and collection of bondage gear, spanking equipment and dressing up box I think they'll be pondering for quite some time
I'd skip the pics... there are some things you can't unsee but I'm totally with Lickety... if you won't leave it on the bus, leave it somewhere super random, like the bottom of the chest freezer.
On the grounds that I have no idea when I'm going to die or according to some, if, would you be my sex picture buddy? On hearing the sad news of my demise you nip round, smash the hard drive on my pc and lap top, destroy the framed photos and the pictures in the album, I'll do the same for you.
Do I look stupid? My brother already has keys and strict instructions written in my book of death.
In answer to your first question, I couldn't possibly say . You're a wise woman DG a wise woman."
If you lived closer I'd surely do it for you. Actually I wonder if there's a business in there somewhere. I mean how many of us would rather our families didn't have to find that shit?! |
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"Haven't you got rid of it yet?
No it's in a suitcase with some other ill thought out purchases of the sex toy kind and a couple of dodgy videos. It'll stay in this loft now and probably be found by our inc_edulous off spring after we die. . I can imagine their faces.
It's worth keeping just for that reason. Perhaps leave them a little note that will leave them pondering.
What with that, our "private" photo album and collection of bondage gear, spanking equipment and dressing up box I think they'll be pondering for quite some time
I'd skip the pics... there are some things you can't unsee but I'm totally with Lickety... if you won't leave it on the bus, leave it somewhere super random, like the bottom of the chest freezer.
On the grounds that I have no idea when I'm going to die or according to some, if, would you be my sex picture buddy? On hearing the sad news of my demise you nip round, smash the hard drive on my pc and lap top, destroy the framed photos and the pictures in the album, I'll do the same for you.
Do I look stupid? My brother already has keys and strict instructions written in my book of death.
In answer to your first question, I couldn't possibly say . You're a wise woman DG a wise woman.
If you lived closer I'd surely do it for you. Actually I wonder if there's a business in there somewhere. I mean how many of us would rather our families didn't have to find that shit?! "
Thank you
Yes there is, go on Dragons Den. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Haven't you got rid of it yet?
No it's in a suitcase with some other ill thought out purchases of the sex toy kind and a couple of dodgy videos. It'll stay in this loft now and probably be found by our inc_edulous off spring after we die. . I can imagine their faces.
It's worth keeping just for that reason. Perhaps leave them a little note that will leave them pondering.
What with that, our "private" photo album and collection of bondage gear, spanking equipment and dressing up box I think they'll be pondering for quite some time
I'd skip the pics... there are some things you can't unsee but I'm totally with Lickety... if you won't leave it on the bus, leave it somewhere super random, like the bottom of the chest freezer.
On the grounds that I have no idea when I'm going to die or according to some, if, would you be my sex picture buddy? On hearing the sad news of my demise you nip round, smash the hard drive on my pc and lap top, destroy the framed photos and the pictures in the album, I'll do the same for you.
Do I look stupid? My brother already has keys and strict instructions written in my book of death.
In answer to your first question, I couldn't possibly say . You're a wise woman DG a wise woman.
If you lived closer I'd surely do it for you. Actually I wonder if there's a business in there somewhere. I mean how many of us would rather our families didn't have to find that shit?!
Thank you
Yes there is, go on Dragons Den. "
And for that reason, I'm in!!!!!!
|
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By *edMan
over a year ago
cambridgeshire |
"Many Christmases ago A bought me a huge and I mean ENORMOUS dildo as a joke present. I've just unpacked it and really have no idea what to do with it...quiet at the back.....I can't just put it in the recycling, can I?
Suggestions welcome.
Paint it green and chuck it in someone's vegetable patch
Is that a hideous euphemism?
Ummm yes, but only because I thought of it as I pressed send
So, congrats, your mind is like mine. People that know me would sorry for you lol
Lol I find it all very amusing "
Just thought... Vegetable snatch |
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"Haven't you got rid of it yet?
No it's in a suitcase with some other ill thought out purchases of the sex toy kind and a couple of dodgy videos. It'll stay in this loft now and probably be found by our inc_edulous off spring after we die. . I can imagine their faces.
It's worth keeping just for that reason. Perhaps leave them a little note that will leave them pondering.
What with that, our "private" photo album and collection of bondage gear, spanking equipment and dressing up box I think they'll be pondering for quite some time
I'd skip the pics... there are some things you can't unsee but I'm totally with Lickety... if you won't leave it on the bus, leave it somewhere super random, like the bottom of the chest freezer.
On the grounds that I have no idea when I'm going to die or according to some, if, would you be my sex picture buddy? On hearing the sad news of my demise you nip round, smash the hard drive on my pc and lap top, destroy the framed photos and the pictures in the album, I'll do the same for you.
Do I look stupid? My brother already has keys and strict instructions written in my book of death.
In answer to your first question, I couldn't possibly say . You're a wise woman DG a wise woman.
If you lived closer I'd surely do it for you. Actually I wonder if there's a business in there somewhere. I mean how many of us would rather our families didn't have to find that shit?!
Thank you
Yes there is, go on Dragons Den.
And for that reason, I'm in!!!!!!
"
You might want to rephrase that |
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"Many Christmases ago A bought me a huge and I mean ENORMOUS dildo as a joke present. I've just unpacked it and really have no idea what to do with it...quiet at the back.....I can't just put it in the recycling, can I?
Suggestions welcome.
Paint it green and chuck it in someone's vegetable patch
Is that a hideous euphemism?
Ummm yes, but only because I thought of it as I pressed send
So, congrats, your mind is like mine. People that know me would sorry for you lol
Lol I find it all very amusing
Just thought... Vegetable snatch "
|
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|
By *edMan
over a year ago
cambridgeshire |
"Many Christmases ago A bought me a huge and I mean ENORMOUS dildo as a joke present. I've just unpacked it and really have no idea what to do with it...quiet at the back.....I can't just put it in the recycling, can I?
Suggestions welcome.
Paint it green and chuck it in someone's vegetable patch
Is that a hideous euphemism?
Ummm yes, but only because I thought of it as I pressed send
So, congrats, your mind is like mine. People that know me would sorry for you lol
Lol I find it all very amusing
Just thought... Vegetable snatch
"
Seriously (no... Really..) Thank you for one of the most entertaining posts on here in ages and ages x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Haven't you got rid of it yet?
No it's in a suitcase with some other ill thought out purchases of the sex toy kind and a couple of dodgy videos. It'll stay in this loft now and probably be found by our inc_edulous off spring after we die. . I can imagine their faces.
It's worth keeping just for that reason. Perhaps leave them a little note that will leave them pondering.
What with that, our "private" photo album and collection of bondage gear, spanking equipment and dressing up box I think they'll be pondering for quite some time
I'd skip the pics... there are some things you can't unsee but I'm totally with Lickety... if you won't leave it on the bus, leave it somewhere super random, like the bottom of the chest freezer.
On the grounds that I have no idea when I'm going to die or according to some, if, would you be my sex picture buddy? On hearing the sad news of my demise you nip round, smash the hard drive on my pc and lap top, destroy the framed photos and the pictures in the album, I'll do the same for you.
Do I look stupid? My brother already has keys and strict instructions written in my book of death.
In answer to your first question, I couldn't possibly say . You're a wise woman DG a wise woman.
If you lived closer I'd surely do it for you. Actually I wonder if there's a business in there somewhere. I mean how many of us would rather our families didn't have to find that shit?!
Thank you
Yes there is, go on Dragons Den.
And for that reason, I'm in!!!!!!
You might want to rephrase that "
My dad was on Dragons Den with a hold all and a shotgun.
Peter Jones asked about his business plan and dad replied "it's very simple Peter, put all the money in the bag". |
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