when i was 20-21 i was with a woman for couple of years till she broke it off. first love and all that so i thought the gutted feeling would pass. and yea it did. bumped inti her mum about 3 years ago who invited me round and her dog had just had pups which my mum has one of. now and then i arrange with my ex to go out walking the dogs and have quiet drink etc and ive fell big time for her again but dont know if to say anything and lose not seeing her at all but keep what we have. its 18 years after we first dated by the way. sorry fot long story |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Are you both single? If yes be honest how you feel but say you don't want to lose her friendship. If either of you aren't single, personally, I wouldn't go there as it will be too messy! Good luck x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"when i was 20-21 i was with a woman for couple of years till she broke it off. first love and all that so i thought the gutted feeling would pass. and yea it did. bumped inti her mum about 3 years ago who invited me round and her dog had just had pups which my mum has one of. now and then i arrange with my ex to go out walking the dogs and have quiet drink etc and ive fell big time for her again but dont know if to say anything and lose not seeing her at all but keep what we have. its 18 years after we first dated by the way. sorry fot long story"
You haven't mentioned her present relationship status...... is she single ?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"yes she is single. shes had loads of dates and short term things but always tells me no one fits the bill and moans about herself."
What was her reason for splitting with you all those years ago.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If it was me I'd show my hand and say what I feel. Wouldn't be too mushy tho...and say you want to be friends even if she doesn't want to go there. I love my ex...wife..still married but not together now for four years. ...she knows how I feel tho it will never happen..but I have always felt she made the wrong decision...and tho I respect that I have always left the door adjar. |
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By *-elleWoman
over a year ago
Romford |
Your both single, so no harm in telling her you enjoy her company and that when you are both free that you'd like to spend more time with her, no pressure to make decisions if it's right it will happen naturally as you both have sexual history.
All I would say is a person evolves over 18yrs, so your both that little bit more mature. Get to know her as a woman now, and she will get to see the man. Enjoy. |
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"yes she is single. shes had loads of dates and short term things but always tells me no one fits the bill and moans about herself.
What was her reason for splitting with you all those years ago.... "
i was bit of a tool tbh. go to football get pissed and ruin sunday plans etc |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"yes she is single. shes had loads of dates and short term things but always tells me no one fits the bill and moans about herself.
What was her reason for splitting with you all those years ago....
i was bit of a tool tbh. go to football get pissed and ruin sunday plans etc"
at 21 you were still young and daft |
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"Are you both single? If yes be honest how you feel but say you don't want to lose her friendship. If either of you aren't single, personally, I wouldn't go there as it will be too messy! Good luck x"
Agree  |
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"yes she is single. shes had loads of dates and short term things but always tells me no one fits the bill and moans about herself.
What was her reason for splitting with you all those years ago....
i was bit of a tool tbh. go to football get pissed and ruin sunday plans etc
at 21 you were still young and daft "
was still getting over losing my dad aswell but yea. youre bang on with what you said. now im just old and daft |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"yes she is single. shes had loads of dates and short term things but always tells me no one fits the bill and moans about herself.
What was her reason for splitting with you all those years ago....
i was bit of a tool tbh. go to football get pissed and ruin sunday plans etc
at 21 you were still young and daft
was still getting over losing my dad aswell but yea. youre bang on with what you said. now im just old and daft"
maybe a grown up chat with her then |
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oh well, finally managed to see her for good talk today and tell her how i feel. shame tho as she just wants to be friends. least she still wants to keep how things are though and not cut off all ties. i can cope with that though as rather have her as a friend than not in my life at all. she said she knew anyway after id said something about "a woman i like" ages ago and clicked i meant her. onwards and upwards though i guess |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"oh well, finally managed to see her for good talk today and tell her how i feel. shame tho as she just wants to be friends. least she still wants to keep how things are though and not cut off all ties. i can cope with that though as rather have her as a friend than not in my life at all. she said she knew anyway after id said something about "a woman i like" ages ago and clicked i meant her. onwards and upwards though i guess"
At least it's off you're chest and you know 
And she still wants to be mates |
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"oh well, finally managed to see her for good talk today and tell her how i feel. shame tho as she just wants to be friends. least she still wants to keep how things are though and not cut off all ties. i can cope with that though as rather have her as a friend than not in my life at all. she said she knew anyway after id said something about "a woman i like" ages ago and clicked i meant her. onwards and upwards though i guess
At least it's off you're chest and you know
And she still wants to be mates "
and she did say never say never, but asked me to not put pressure on her. . ive waited 20 years so whats a bit longer eh lol |
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"Tell her, she could be thinking the exact same, prob not a good idea to tell her you asked a gang of swinger strangers for advice tho.
Good luck pal, hope it goes well"
just postedvon thread that i have got to tell her today and its a no go im afraid  |
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"oh well, finally managed to see her for good talk today and tell her how i feel. shame tho as she just wants to be friends. least she still wants to keep how things are though and not cut off all ties. i can cope with that though as rather have her as a friend than not in my life at all. she said she knew anyway after id said something about "a woman i like" ages ago and clicked i meant her. onwards and upwards though i guess"
Bad luck OP, though since that is the case, a clean break, and trying to move on, might be better for you in the long run. You'll never find your soulmate if she prefers to keep you dangling.
Mr ddc |
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"oh well, finally managed to see her for good talk today and tell her how i feel. shame tho as she just wants to be friends. least she still wants to keep how things are though and not cut off all ties. i can cope with that though as rather have her as a friend than not in my life at all. she said she knew anyway after id said something about "a woman i like" ages ago and clicked i meant her. nonwards and upwards though i guess
Bad luck OP, though since that is the case, a clean break, and trying to move on, might be better for you in the long run. You'll never find your soulmate if she prefers to keep you dangling.
Mr ddc"
get what youre saying, and to be fair i dont see her that often now anyway. hence why its taken so long from first post to this update. hard tho cus went 15-16 years not seeing her and always thought about her during that time |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"oh well, finally managed to see her for good talk today and tell her how i feel. shame tho as she just wants to be friends. least she still wants to keep how things are though and not cut off all ties. i can cope with that though as rather have her as a friend than not in my life at all. she said she knew anyway after id said something about "a woman i like" ages ago and clicked i meant her. onwards and upwards though i guess
At least it's off you're chest and you know
And she still wants to be mates
and she did say never say never, but asked me to not put pressure on her. . ive waited 20 years so whats a bit longer eh lol"
I waited 20 years to get back with my first true love, it's worth the wait |
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By *evaquitCouple
over a year ago
Catthorpe |
You have to say something. I'd rather be without and move on then to have feelings for someone and they're not reciprocated, better to know then waste time, imo. I'm not one for the "friend zone", that's just me.
Him |
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"oh well, finally managed to see her for good talk today and tell her how i feel. shame tho as she just wants to be friends. least she still wants to keep how things are though and not cut off all ties. i can cope with that though as rather have her as a friend than not in my life at all. she said she knew anyway after id said something about "a woman i like" ages ago and clicked i meant her. monwards and upwards though i guess
At least it's off you're chest and you know
And she still wants to be mates
and she did say never say never, but asked me to not put pressure on her. . ive waited 20 years so whats a bit longer eh lol
I waited 20 years to get back with my first true love, it's worth the wait "
thanks for that. i may reduce contact but never stop hoping |
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