What's the most embarrassing things your kids have done to you.
When callum was about four it was the middle of winter and the health visitor came round, he was playing upstairs and I called him down, he entered the room wearing nothing but a vest asking if he could have a piece of dry bed because he was hungry 
Then when he was about fourteen he used to go to the video shop all the while and got friendly with the guy in there, he came home one day and said the guy wanted to go out on a date with me, he'd only bloody took a photo of me down and told him I was single. Never went in there again.
I had/have a posh friend and when her little girl was a out four she had a new baby, when at the checkout in the supermarket my friend asked her not to do something and she did no more than run to the front of the shop, curl up in a ball shouting don't beat me mummy |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I remember being on a Thames boat trip with my oldest son, we passed a sewage works and it stunk to high heaven, and he said at the top of his voice, " ugh Dad, somebody farted", he was only about 5 at the time, some people laughed, including me.   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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a couple of years ago we were on a shopping trip to Chester and we were waiting to cross a busy road....My son (aged 7 at the time) spotted a dwarf on the other side of the road and pointed straight at him and said 'look mum, that man's only as tall as me' and burst out laughing!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I remember when my daughter was about 5 I was having a new kitchen fitted so had the work men in, she came downstairs with one of the old Dr whites sanitary towels over her face with the loops hooked over each ear, when I asked her what she was doing she said she was a doctor |
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We were at the local swimming pool about 6 months ago and my son who's 4 and I were in the jacuzzi pool part and he piped up really loud.. 'Why is everyone farting in here?'
Also when he was little we were in tesco and he pointed at a very tall black lady with a massive Afro and shouted DADDY.. I was in hysterics! The lady in question looked a bit alarmed tho! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My oldest girl was in the supermarket with me in the pet food aisle buying dog food and she shouted at the top of her voice "not dog food sandwiches again". A little old lady looked at me as if I were the devil |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We were at the local swimming pool about 6 months ago and my son who's 4 and I were in the jacuzzi pool part and he piped up really loud.. 'Why is everyone farting in here?'
Also when he was little we were in tesco and he pointed at a very tall black lady with a massive Afro and shouted DADDY.. I was in hysterics! The lady in question looked a bit alarmed tho! "
My daughter said "Daddy" when she saw the actor Whitaker on TV. What was alarming is that Daddy and I were very much married and we all lived together. |
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The other half got me a mug, which is covered in rainbows, castles and clouds and it has a unicorn on it.
Was having dinner the other day with said mug and my daughter (6&half) leans over and reads the lettering...
"I want... a... fucking unicorn?"
Sharp intake of breath around the room. That's a very rude word, that's an adult word, don't every let anyone at school or granny or granddad hear you say that...
"What," asks my daughter, "Like twat?"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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In a restaraunt on holiday, one of our little cherubs emptied all the salt over the table,kicked his younger brother and was generally a pain in the arse. (think he was about 8 ish) So told him off and said he would not be allowed a pudding. To which he replied, and at the top of his voice... "You are a child abuser. I suppose I should be grateful that youre not dragging me to the car to beat me with that big stick that you keep in the boot. Im still covered in bruises from the last time!"
And the place was packed! I just wanted the ground to open up!
Needless to say, Ive never beaten him with a stick....but could have happily throttled him with my bare hands.
xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Was in the supermarket with my eldest after school just grabbing a few bits, he was 6 at the time. We walked straight past the booze aisle and towards the back of the shop. Son stops in his tracks and yells "mummy, what day is it?" I tell him it's Tuesday and ask why. "Because you've gone past the wine mummy and you usually can't cope by the weekend!" |
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By *ikeC81Man
over a year ago
harrow |
"In a restaraunt on holiday, one of our little cherubs emptied all the salt over the table,kicked his younger brother and was generally a pain in the arse. (think he was about 8 ish) So told him off and said he would not be allowed a pudding. To which he replied, and at the top of his voice... "You are a child abuser. I suppose I should be grateful that youre not dragging me to the car to beat me with that big stick that you keep in the boot. Im still covered in bruises from the last time!"
And the place was packed! I just wanted the ground to open up!
Needless to say, Ive never beaten him with a stick....but could have happily throttled him with my bare hands.
xx"
Has just pissed my self sniggering in the office |
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"[Removed by poster at 16/09/15 16:35:11]"
My 5 year old was being interviewed by a social worker and police officer (about something that had happened at school) and to relax him, the social worker asked him to draw a picture of her. Once done she said "oh that's lovely what's this bit?" - "your earrings!" he replied.... And this bit?.... "Your moustache...."
Thanks son...
D |
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I was once shopping with one of my daughters who was only about 3 at the time, we were served by an Asian lady who was sporting a Bindi - my daughter pointed at it and said "that ;day has a poorly head" - the said lady didn't know what she on about…. and then the penny dropped, thankfully, she recognised the innocence of a 3 year old!
I just looked at the floor, waiting for it to open |
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