FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Help! It won't go hard: Windows 10
Help! It won't go hard: Windows 10
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
I turn to Fab for sex to help with my frustrations in life. I sometimes find a laugh on the forum helps too (although sometimes I wound up and experience a whole different set of frustrations).
I do know that when I ask for help, though, someone will usually come forward and provide that help.
I beg for such help now.
I have spent the morning turning my work laptop on and off. That's all I can do. The Windows 10 screen comes up, the cursor moves around but it won't go 'hard' in the password box so that I can type in the password.
The mouse is connected by a cable. The tracker pad also moves the cursor. The cursor never gets 'hard' however nice or horrible I am to it.
I'm stuck. I can't get in to do anything like take away Windows 10. It just keeps me on the blue password page with that bloody window.
Frustrated beyond belief. Who want's sex?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sex is a good way of dealing with computer issues.
When i'm talking to the helpline guy from Mumbai he says "turn it off and on again"
I do
Computers still not working.
I then launch it out of the window and say to the guy from Mumbai "you can go now, i'm going off to have sex"
I do the same when i'm not at work |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Sex is a good way of dealing with computer issues.
When i'm talking to the helpline guy from Mumbai he says "turn it off and on again"
I do
Computers still not working.
I then launch it out of the window and say to the guy from Mumbai "you can go now, i'm going off to have sex"
I do the same when i'm not at work"
I haven't launched it out of the Windows yet. 
I haven't tried Mumbai either.
Sex seems to be only option left.
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Mine is working perfectly and didn't take long to install at all.  "
Thanks for that helpful comment, Lib! You haven't even offered sex as a solution.
I'm letting the battery die now as I can't think of anything else to do.
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"I find the following helps:
Turn computer off.
Turn it in again.
Does it work now?
If yes, have sex.
If no, shout at it loudly, then have sex."
The yes option for sex wasn't possible.
The no and shouting loudly has taken place but so far no sex.
I just want it to go hard.
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"I've still not upgraded my laptop to windows 10. Don't think I will now after reading this. "
Our IT department at work suggested we didn't do it on our personal computers. The upgrade is valid for a year so they told us to wait. Kinda glad about that.
Sorry Lickety... defo give up and have sex. That'll be far more satisfying and if you're doing it right you shouldn't break any windows.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You could just use it as a power brick for your vibrator now?
How do I do that? That would help drain the battery.
"
Connect them together and turn it on (I'm led to believe vibrators are charged via USB these days). |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The best way to switch off a malfunctioning computer is with a sledgehammer
Then have raunchy, dirty, filthy, debased sex
Then get in the car and go to PC World |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"You could just use it as a power brick for your vibrator now?
How do I do that? That would help drain the battery.
Connect them together and turn it on (I'm led to believe vibrators are charged via USB these days)."
You're right! I was given a wand for my birthday. It's never run out so I've never charged it (I don't really use it).
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"In my professional opinion as a computer user.... its fooked.... you need to seek help from those who have the power.
Good luck "
So your professional opinion doesn't recommend the sex option?
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"The best way to switch off a malfunctioning computer is with a sledgehammer
Then have raunchy, dirty, filthy, debased sex
Then get in the car and go to PC World"
Just so that I am clear... do I have sex before going to PC World or do I have sex at PC World? Following Lib!'s advice, do I leave the wand charging when I take it to PC World?
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Did you have sex with the computer.. if it's an older model it can take a while for it to go hard ..  "
I suppose it is old for a computer as it's almost three. Isn't the blue screen the same as a blue pill for it?
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Has it worked ok on Windows 10 before Lickety? Or was this after/whilst upgrading? Pc world do a shag and replace service atm."
Shag and replace? Hmmm. I fear I may have no option.
It worked ok last week with Windows 10 installed. I did turn off the notify the world of everything you are doing option. Do you think it's punishing me because I sought some privacy?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Try the tab key
That didn't work either. The cursor lets me drag the pretty picture screen down so I've done that so that the blue screen and that window isn't mocking me."
Have you tried typing the password, even if you don't think you have a hard on? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Lucky who gets a shag lol
But yeah you can still log in by using the tab key top left as you press it you will see the text box gets highlighted on log in screen, then type some letters. |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Try the tab key
That didn't work either. The cursor lets me drag the pretty picture screen down so I've done that so that the blue screen and that window isn't mocking me.
Have you tried typing the password, even if you don't think you have a hard on?"
That was the first thing I did. I would never make it feel inadequate or like it wasn't trying. I used a mixture of light and hard strokes but nothing happened. Should I have shown it my tits?
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Lucky who gets a shag lol
But yeah you can still log in by using the tab key top left as you press it you will see the text box gets highlighted on log in screen, then type some letters."
It didn't work. Nothing happened.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Lucky who gets a shag lol
But yeah you can still log in by using the tab key top left as you press it you will see the text box gets highlighted on log in screen, then type some letters.
It didn't work. Nothing happened.
"
You can also try pressing the f8 key as windows is opening then a boot menu appears, use the arrows key and select last known good configuration. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Try the tab key
That didn't work either. The cursor lets me drag the pretty picture screen down so I've done that so that the blue screen and that window isn't mocking me.
Have you tried typing the password, even if you don't think you have a hard on?
That was the first thing I did. I would never make it feel inadequate or like it wasn't trying. I used a mixture of light and hard strokes but nothing happened. Should I have shown it my tits?
"
Maybe use your tits to give it a good bashing. |
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By *smCouple
over a year ago
Liskeard |
"Start it up in safe mode???
A swinger not being safe 
It's playing with my wand now. Should I have put a condom on the wand? "
Depends so you an anti virus installed?
Have you tried taking the battery out as a hard reset, make it wait for a while, in anticipation before inserting it again?
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"Lucky who gets a shag lol
But yeah you can still log in by using the tab key top left as you press it you will see the text box gets highlighted on log in screen, then type some letters.
It didn't work. Nothing happened.
You can also try pressing the f8 key as windows is opening then a boot menu appears, use the arrows key and select last known good configuration."
Run it in safe mode as above f8 on load up |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Lucky who gets a shag lol
But yeah you can still log in by using the tab key top left as you press it you will see the text box gets highlighted on log in screen, then type some letters.
It didn't work. Nothing happened.
You can also try pressing the f8 key as windows is opening then a boot menu appears, use the arrows key and select last known good configuration."
That didn't work either. I have pressed all the keys I can think to press.
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Start it up in safe mode???
A swinger not being safe
It's playing with my wand now. Should I have put a condom on the wand?
Depends so you an anti virus installed?
Have you tried taking the battery out as a hard reset, make it wait for a while, in anticipation before inserting it again?
"
I can't get the battery out. I am using my wand to drain the battery to get to a hard reset.
Once it has drained I might just let it wait. It's left me unfulfilled all day.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Lucky who gets a shag lol
But yeah you can still log in by using the tab key top left as you press it you will see the text box gets highlighted on log in screen, then type some letters.
It didn't work. Nothing happened.
You can also try pressing the f8 key as windows is opening then a boot menu appears, use the arrows key and select last known good configuration.
That didn't work either. I have pressed all the keys I can think to press.
"
There are about 10 options also on that menu, try them and as well. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I turn to Fab for sex to help with my frustrations in life. I sometimes find a laugh on the forum helps too (although sometimes I wound up and experience a whole different set of frustrations).
I do know that when I ask for help, though, someone will usually come forward and provide that help.
I beg for such help now.
I have spent the morning turning my work laptop on and off. That's all I can do. The Windows 10 screen comes up, the cursor moves around but it won't go 'hard' in the password box so that I can type in the password.
The mouse is connected by a cable. The tracker pad also moves the cursor. The cursor never gets 'hard' however nice or horrible I am to it.
I'm stuck. I can't get in to do anything like take away Windows 10. It just keeps me on the blue password page with that bloody window.
Frustrated beyond belief. Who want's sex?
"
Press f8 start in safe mode the use restore
Then when that fails press f8 and use last know good configuration
|
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Lucky who gets a shag lol
But yeah you can still log in by using the tab key top left as you press it you will see the text box gets highlighted on log in screen, then type some letters.
It didn't work. Nothing happened.
You can also try pressing the f8 key as windows is opening then a boot menu appears, use the arrows key and select last known good configuration.
That didn't work either. I have pressed all the keys I can think to press.
There are about 10 options also on that menu, try them and as well."
It's not going to any menus. I press keys and it resolutely remains on the blue password screen with the Windows window. The only thing it is letting me do is switch it on and off and toggle between the pretty picture screen and the password screen.
|
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"Start it up in safe mode???
A swinger not being safe
It's playing with my wand now. Should I have put a condom on the wand?
Depends so you an anti virus installed?
Have you tried taking the battery out as a hard reset, make it wait for a while, in anticipation before inserting it again?
"
I use this method. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Lucky who gets a shag lol
But yeah you can still log in by using the tab key top left as you press it you will see the text box gets highlighted on log in screen, then type some letters.
It didn't work. Nothing happened.
You can also try pressing the f8 key as windows is opening then a boot menu appears, use the arrows key and select last known good configuration.
That didn't work either. I have pressed all the keys I can think to press.
There are about 10 options also on that menu, try them and as well.
It's not going to any menus. I press keys and it resolutely remains on the blue password screen with the Windows window. The only thing it is letting me do is switch it on and off and toggle between the pretty picture screen and the password screen.
"
You do f8 when it is booting up before password screen
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Lucky who gets a shag lol
But yeah you can still log in by using the tab key top left as you press it you will see the text box gets highlighted on log in screen, then type some letters.
It didn't work. Nothing happened.
You can also try pressing the f8 key as windows is opening then a boot menu appears, use the arrows key and select last known good configuration.
That didn't work either. I have pressed all the keys I can think to press.
There are about 10 options also on that menu, try them and as well.
It's not going to any menus. I press keys and it resolutely remains on the blue password screen with the Windows window. The only thing it is letting me do is switch it on and off and toggle between the pretty picture screen and the password screen.
"
I see so did you press the f8 key about 10 times immediately as windows starts?. |
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crikey!!! looks like this is not an uncommon problem  and is a whole load of bother to sort
Do you have a USB keyboard you can plug in to one of the USB ports on the laptop?
Try unplugging and leaving out the usb mouse... switch off everything... and then power up again.
|
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Lucky who gets a shag lol
But yeah you can still log in by using the tab key top left as you press it you will see the text box gets highlighted on log in screen, then type some letters.
It didn't work. Nothing happened.
You can also try pressing the f8 key as windows is opening then a boot menu appears, use the arrows key and select last known good configuration.
That didn't work either. I have pressed all the keys I can think to press.
There are about 10 options also on that menu, try them and as well.
It's not going to any menus. I press keys and it resolutely remains on the blue password screen with the Windows window. The only thing it is letting me do is switch it on and off and toggle between the pretty picture screen and the password screen.
I see so did you press the f8 key about 10 times immediately as windows starts?."
Yep! Nothing happens.
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"The best way to switch off a malfunctioning computer is with a sledgehammer
Then have raunchy, dirty, filthy, debased sex
Then get in the car and go to PC World
Just so that I am clear... do I have sex before going to PC World or do I have sex at PC World? Following Lib!'s advice, do I leave the wand charging when I take it to PC World?
"
Why not have sex AT PC World. That way if you put in a good performance they might give you a managers special |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"crikey!!! looks like this is not an uncommon problem and is a whole load of bother to sort
Do you have a USB keyboard you can plug in to one of the USB ports on the laptop?
Try unplugging and leaving out the usb mouse... switch off everything... and then power up again.
"
I don't have a USB keyboard. I might be able to get one from a neighbour.
I did try taking out the USB mouse and using the track pad and it was the same.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have my serious head on now.......
Did the PC come with a Windows Recovery Disk?
If so, insert disk, switch off, switch on, PC should boot from Recovery Disk
Maybe |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If you don't have a recovery disk (some manufacturers prompt you to make one when you first use the PC), get one from a mate
the disk, not a shag, we are past the shagging stage now |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Lucky who gets a shag lol
But yeah you can still log in by using the tab key top left as you press it you will see the text box gets highlighted on log in screen, then type some letters.
It didn't work. Nothing happened.
You can also try pressing the f8 key as windows is opening then a boot menu appears, use the arrows key and select last known good configuration.
That didn't work either. I have pressed all the keys I can think to press.
There are about 10 options also on that menu, try them and as well.
It's not going to any menus. I press keys and it resolutely remains on the blue password screen with the Windows window. The only thing it is letting me do is switch it on and off and toggle between the pretty picture screen and the password screen.
I see so did you press the f8 key about 10 times immediately as windows starts?.
Yep! Nothing happens.
"
Yes not good, not sure what else it could be there. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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and a message to all you other fabbers out there......always make a recovery disk for this very reason. Your PC is set up to try and boot from a disk before it boots from a hard drive for this very reason
Herendeth this lesson |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"I have my serious head on now.......
Did the PC come with a Windows Recovery Disk?
If so, insert disk, switch off, switch on, PC should boot from Recovery Disk
Maybe"
It doesn't have a disk drive. It's all cloudy! |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"crikey!!! looks like this is not an uncommon problem and is a whole load of bother to sort
Do you have a USB keyboard you can plug in to one of the USB ports on the laptop?
Try unplugging and leaving out the usb mouse... switch off everything... and then power up again.
"
That didn't work either.
On the plus side I have the Yo Yo Ma Proms on the help soothe me.
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Hold ctl + alt + del, as I do you doggie style at the window then launch it out the window as you climax. 
Then claim it on your insurance "
I can see my claim form now: Broken window as I tried to launch Windows 10.
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Do you get the password box on the screen?
If so, in the bottom right corner, do you have an icon which looks a bit like a lock showing 3 o'clock?
If you do, click on this icon and then click 'on screen keyboard'
If you can login, then at least you can try restoring your computer back to a previous day when it all worked |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Do you get the password box on the screen?
If so, in the bottom right corner, do you have an icon which looks a bit like a lock showing 3 o'clock?
If you do, click on this icon and then click 'on screen keyboard'
If you can login, then at least you can try restoring your computer back to a previous day when it all worked "
I have got that icon. I tried clicking on all of the icons. Nothing happened. I seem to be stuck as I can't login by any method.
I'm draining the battery as a last desperate measure. If that fails I'll take it to PC World tomorrow.
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"
I have got that icon. I tried clicking on all of the icons. Nothing happened. I seem to be stuck as I can't login by any method.
I'm draining the battery as a last desperate measure. If that fails I'll take it to PC World tomorrow.
"
It does sound like either a driver issue or a hardware probably, your only hope is probably a USB keyboard, to get you logged in initially |
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"Lib! wins.
The wand drained the battery and now it has a screen. I still can't login yet but it is doing that configuring Windows update thing.
The wand really is magic."
Sounds promising, fingers crossed  |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Lib! wins.
The wand drained the battery and now it has a screen. I still can't login yet but it is doing that configuring Windows update thing.
The wand really is magic.
Sounds promising, fingers crossed "
I'm in!
I suppose I'd better do some work now before it changes it's mind.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Did you do the upgrade manually or did it say ready to upgrade
Could be a driver issue but if said ready itself then it's generally got the drivers already,
As said, sage mode, finger the on button until you turn it off
Refinger the on button to turn it back on, then press F8 repeatedly (if it starts to beep each time you press it stop, it's not accepting any more inputs)
Let it boot and you should get the safe mode, safe mode with networking screen,last known configuration should be at the bottom |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Did you do the upgrade manually or did it say ready to upgrade
Could be a driver issue but if said ready itself then it's generally got the drivers already,
As said, sage mode, finger the on button until you turn it off
Refinger the on button to turn it back on, then press F8 repeatedly (if it starts to beep each time you press it stop, it's not accepting any more inputs)
Let it boot and you should get the safe mode, safe mode with networking screen,last known configuration should be at the bottom "
Wow just like sex, everyone has sorted, packed up and left by the time get there, glad it's sorted |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Look at your keyboard and make sure the function key is not on
Failing that what computer is it
Acer Aspire V5."
same as mine I have given up on Qin 10 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I turn to Fab for sex to help with my frustrations in life. I sometimes find a laugh on the forum helps too (although sometimes I wound up and experience a whole different set of frustrations).
I do know that when I ask for help, though, someone will usually come forward and provide that help.
I beg for such help now.
I have spent the morning turning my work laptop on and off. That's all I can do. The Windows 10 screen comes up, the cursor moves around but it won't go 'hard' in the password box so that I can type in the password.
The mouse is connected by a cable. The tracker pad also moves the cursor. The cursor never gets 'hard' however nice or horrible I am to it.
I'm stuck. I can't get in to do anything like take away Windows 10. It just keeps me on the blue password page with that bloody window.
Frustrated beyond belief. Who want's sex?
"
My sister usually threatens her laptop with throwing it out the window or saying shell smash it with a hammer. If that doesn't work go find sex |
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"
Sounds promising, fingers crossed
I'm in!
"
Which, ironically, is what I shout when we're having sex 
There comes a point in the life of every computer when one has to decide whether or not the stuff you have on there is worth having the spotty teenager in PC World looking at your foo-foo pics 
Mr ddc |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Did you do the upgrade manually or did it say ready to upgrade
Could be a driver issue but if said ready itself then it's generally got the drivers already,
As said, sage mode, finger the on button until you turn it off
Refinger the on button to turn it back on, then press F8 repeatedly (if it starts to beep each time you press it stop, it's not accepting any more inputs)
Let it boot and you should get the safe mode, safe mode with networking screen,last known configuration should be at the bottom
Wow just like sex, everyone has sorted, packed up and left by the time get there, glad it's sorted"
Thank you anyway. You may have helped a lurker who is experiencing a similar issue.
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"
Sounds promising, fingers crossed
I'm in!
Which, ironically, is what I shout when we're having sex
There comes a point in the life of every computer when one has to decide whether or not the stuff you have on there is worth having the spotty teenager in PC World looking at your foo-foo pics
Mr ddc"
What sort of computer do you think it is? My computer has no such images. Ever! The only really embarrassing (and extremely rude) thing is the password, which just won't let me change it however often I try. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Switch of computer. Wait a few sec, switch on again, at the same push non stop button F3, it should take you for black scree called boot manager, you will see there option like restore point, choose run Windows in normal mode or emergency. |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Switch of computer. Wait a few sec, switch on again, at the same push non stop button F3, it should take you for black scree called boot manager, you will see there option like restore point, choose run Windows in normal mode or emergency. "
Thanks.
It's all working again now. I hope it works again tomorrow.
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"so much trouble already
id so rip it out and go back to the other operating system than have to put up with another problem "
I am considering that but will then need to start another help thread.  |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
" The only really embarrassing (and extremely rude) thing is the password, which just won't let me change it however often I try.
Greetings, fellow cuntychops! "
Don't give it away. It won't let me change it.
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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago
Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else |
" The only really embarrassing (and extremely rude) thing is the password, which just won't let me change it however often I try.
Greetings, fellow cuntychops!
Don't give it away. It won't let me change it.
"
That's why I didn't include the mandatory two digits....
Soul of discretion, me... |
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just incase that you decide to revert back
If you’ve upgraded a PC to Windows 10 — not performed a clean install, but an upgrade — you’ll have an easy option that lets you revert to the last version of Windows. To access this, open the Start menu and select Settings. Click the “Update & security” icon and select “Recovery.”
You should see a “Go back to Windows 7? or “Go back to Windows 8.1? option. Click the Get started button to get rid of your Windows 10 install and restore your previous Windows install. Microsoft will ask you why you want to go back.
If it’s been over a month — or if you’ve run the DIsk cleanup tool and removed the “Previous Windows installations” files or deleted the C:\Windows.old folder by hand — you’ll no longer see this option. Windows 10 appears to automatically remove the old Windows installation files after a month to free up space. |
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By *icketysplits OP Woman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"just incase that you decide to revert back
If you’ve upgraded a PC to Windows 10 — not performed a clean install, but an upgrade — you’ll have an easy option that lets you revert to the last version of Windows. To access this, open the Start menu and select Settings. Click the “Update & security” icon and select “Recovery.”
You should see a “Go back to Windows 7? or “Go back to Windows 8.1? option. Click the Get started button to get rid of your Windows 10 install and restore your previous Windows install. Microsoft will ask you why you want to go back.
If it’s been over a month — or if you’ve run the DIsk cleanup tool and removed the “Previous Windows installations” files or deleted the C:\Windows.old folder by hand — you’ll no longer see this option. Windows 10 appears to automatically remove the old Windows installation files after a month to free up space."
Thanks. I'll have a look tomorrow.
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"There comes a point in the life of every computer when one has to decide whether or not the stuff you have on there is worth having the spotty teenager in PC World looking at your foo-foo pics
Mr ddc
What sort of computer do you think it is? My computer has no such images. Ever! The only really embarrassing (and extremely rude) thing is the password, which just won't let me change it however often I try."
Pfft!
That's not what the nice chap from Nigeria told me - and he promised to share them if I lent him my credit card details...
Mind you, he's not infallible, he was wrong about me winning that lottery 
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