FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > are some single women responsible..
are some single women responsible..
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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For the attitudes for single guys and their perception of what fab is really about... I have recently read a status of a single female saying but not to quote exactly " out on the piss will be blasted so won't know who I am or who I'm with"
What do you others think about this attitude? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Her body, her choice.
Why do you want us to judge her?"
I am not judging anyone just saying why single guys get impression that fab is just about getting their rocks off! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Her body, her choice.
Why do you want us to judge her?
I am not judging anyone just saying why single guys get impression that fab is just about getting their rocks off!"
There seem to be many people who have a very fixed idea that their perception of Fab is the true character of the site. Some will say 'this is a sex site don't write a f**king essay' or 'no message ping pong' whilst others say 'no one liners, women want to get to know someone before they meet them' etc... For some, fab is about getting rocks off and for others it is a dating site. To each their own. I suppose you just need to make sure that those you chat to understand why you are here and don't worry what others do. |
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By *ugby 123Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
"Her body, her choice.
Why do you want us to judge her?
I am not judging anyone just saying why single guys get impression that fab is just about getting their rocks off!"
But isn't it? Why do you think anyone joins? We joined to meet people for sex |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Her body, her choice.
Why do you want us to judge her?
I am not judging anyone just saying why single guys get impression that fab is just about getting their rocks off!
There seem to be many people who have a very fixed idea that their perception of Fab is the true character of the site. Some will say 'this is a sex site don't write a f**king essay' or 'no message ping pong' whilst others say 'no one liners, women want to get to know someone before they meet them' etc... For some, fab is about getting rocks off and for others it is a dating site. To each their own. I suppose you just need to make sure that those you chat to understand why you are here and don't worry what others do."
I am seriously sticking up for the genuine single men who are on here looking for more than just a one off.. and not the flipping fly by nights who have a profile for a day or two hoping to get a quick fumble because they are in the mood or are on a weekend away with the boys.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I imagine that many of the women who post the spontaneous 'ready for a shag now' posts are also men! I dread to think how many men/women chats on here are, unwittingly, men/men chats.., |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I imagine that many of the women who post the spontaneous 'ready for a shag now' posts are also men! I dread to think how many men/women chats on here are, unwittingly, men/men chats..,"
Very true there are quiet a few men pretending to be women or couples , a usual give away is being on the site and no photo verification or meet verification yet they have been on here for over a year.
Though if a woman wants to post or make a profile. It up to them what they write or say. Same goes for us blokes |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Her body, her choice.
Why do you want us to judge her?
I am not judging anyone just saying why single guys get impression that fab is just about getting their rocks off!"
For some it is. ....is that not allowed? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I imagine that many of the women who post the spontaneous 'ready for a shag now' posts are also men! I dread to think how many men/women chats on here are, unwittingly, men/men chats..,"
Oh because women couldn't possibly just want sex now. .. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There's already a poor perception of promiscuous people in general. Especially of women, because they're just sluts to be used who will fuck anything kind of attitude.
This attitude comes from men who don't really know any promiscuous women that well, or have been cheated on by a 'slut' and now degrade those women to deal with that, or are just old fashioned or something idk.
Whatever it is these people won't change their attitude until they really get to know actual people, and treat women like actual people. They are likely to have confirmation bias and only see stuff that confirms what 'these women' are like. The media also doesn't help with this either and has forced women to hide their sexuality away so that being a sexual woman isn't ormal unless it's to make money...kind of fucked up but that's how it is.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"There's already a poor perception of promiscuous people in general. Especially of women, because they're just sluts to be used who will fuck anything kind of attitude.
This attitude comes from men who don't really know any promiscuous women that well, or have been cheated on by a 'slut' and now degrade those women to deal with that, or are just old fashioned or something idk.
Whatever it is these people won't change their attitude until they really get to know actual people, and treat women like actual people. They are likely to have confirmation bias and only see stuff that confirms what 'these women' are like. The media also doesn't help with this either and has forced women to hide their sexuality away so that being a sexual woman isn't ormal unless it's to make money...kind of fucked up but that's how it is.
"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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And many genuine single men want nothing more than one offs....as do many genuine single females and many genuine couples. How does not wanting more than NSA make anyone less genuine? |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
First question: No, they aren't.
Second question: It's not how I choose to have fun but it's up to them.
Even if what these women post leads men to have a poor attitude towards them, I don't see why it should affect their _iew of anyone else or the site.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"First question: No, they aren't.
Second question: It's not how I choose to have fun but it's up to them.
Even if what these women post leads men to have a poor attitude towards them, I don't see why it should affect their _iew of anyone else or the site.
But don't you think it does some how tard fab as just a sex fest?
"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I agree we all want attention but my thead was on about just one off.sex "
As long as both involved are happy with that, what's the problem?
Fab isn't a dating site. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"First question: No, they aren't.
Second question: It's not how I choose to have fun but it's up to them.
Even if what these women post leads men to have a poor attitude towards them, I don't see why it should affect their _iew of anyone else or the site.
But don't you think it does some how tard fab as just a sex fest?
"
Many guys join up to sex sites with this attitude before they join, that's why we keep seeing women moaning about the shit messages they get on here.
One guy i've been flirting with for a while now thinks i'm a sure thing and a slag since he found out i'm on here but before that i was a different person in his eyes. Sad as fuck really, i'm still the same person just his attitude has changed now.
This site doesn't promote that attitude, it's how society treats sexually liberated women on the whole.
If anything that womans status will attract predators rather than misogynists, and that's scaryier to me tbh. But some women get off on being vulnerable so that's her thing. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm not here looking for a fwb,it's nice when you find one but not imperative for me. I don't do impulse meets though,so if someone wants here and now they will be disappointed,or find someone who does. There are loads of people having one off meets. I suspect that happens at parties and clubs too. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I agree we all want attention but my thead was on about just one off.sex what's this site for?"
It was on about attitude to the site and how you present yourself to people x |
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By *ugby 123Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
"My point is that single guys get slaughtered for being on here and being false and not genuine when the majority are xx"
Sorry but that isn't what you said in your first and subsequent posts....it was more that women who are on here for sex with others are giving men the wrong impression.
Looking for sex and having it on a swinging site is normal, whether you meet a person once or more than once. |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
"My point is that single guys get slaughtered for being on here and being false and not genuine when the majority are xx"
Do you think slagging off a few women who do things you don't like will make that better? |
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"I agree we all want attention but my thead was on about just one off.sex what's this site for?
It was on about attitude to the site and how you present yourself to people x"
but we all present our selves differently, you do things hour way let others do it there way. There is no right or wrong way |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I do actually find her status scary personally and makes her vulnerable to predators, but that might be her thing? She might be sub or into being used or into all sorts we're not into that's all.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"For the attitudes for single guys and their perception of what fab is really about... I have recently read a status of a single female saying but not to quote exactly " out on the piss will be blasted so won't know who I am or who I'm with"
What do you others think about this attitude? "
I think she was attention seeking. My own opinion of what fab is about is exactly that my own opinion.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I use it to get my rocks off. I want sex. I'll get sex.
I like cock shots and fancy a fuck messages.
Makes it soooo much easier if all cards are on the table. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"My point is that single guys get slaughtered for being on here and being false and not genuine when the majority are xx
Do you think slagging off a few women who do things you don't like will make that better?"
I am not "shagging" just "quoting" and highlight why some single men will get the impression that this site is just a free for all come and get me my legs are open!!!! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"My point is that single guys get slaughtered for being on here and being false and not genuine when the majority are xx
Do you think slagging off a few women who do things you don't like will make that better?"
I am not "slaging" just "quoting" and highlight why some single men will get the impression that this site is just a free for all come and get me my legs are open!!!! |
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"For the attitudes for single guys and their perception of what fab is really about... I have recently read a status of a single female saying but not to quote exactly " out on the piss will be blasted so won't know who I am or who I'm with"
What do you others think about this attitude? "
No.
Just like it's not a man's fault if he is beaten up.
Or a dog's fault if it is isn't given food.
Everybody's attitude is their own responsibility.
If men are only coming across that type of female then maybe they should fish from a bigger pond.
Ever thought that men come here because that exactly the kind of woman they are looking for ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sounds exactly what Chrissie Hyndes said today. 
"
I'm going to expand on this one a bit, and yes it's a very controversial thing to say, But do you think that by the status that this woman had posted, and the fact that she'll be unlikely be in a condition to make a rational choice is not inviting trouble for herself ?
I'm definitely not saying that women should dress moderately and act demure, not go out and have a good time, but is she leaving herself vulnerable to potential abuse ?
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"My point is that single guys get slaughtered for being on here and being false and not genuine when the majority are xx
Do you think slagging off a few women who do things you don't like will make that better?
I am not "slaging" just "quoting" and highlight why some single men will get the impression that this site is just a free for all come and get me my legs are open!!!!"
You ARE being judgemental because it's a woman.
That IS what this site is for. Most women here have a relaxed attitude to sex.
Mind you.... every now and then a woman hating woman pops up.
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"Sounds exactly what Chrissie Hyndes said today.
I'm going to expand on this one a bit, and yes it's a very controversial thing to say, But do you think that by the status that this woman had posted, and the fact that she'll be unlikely be in a condition to make a rational choice is not inviting trouble for herself ?
I'm definitely not saying that women should dress moderately and act demure, not go out and have a good time, but is she leaving herself vulnerable to potential abuse ?
"
My concern was for her advertising that she is going to be over drinking too.
What ever.. any bloke worth his salt would turn his nose up at this kind of behaviour anyway .... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sounds exactly what Chrissie Hyndes said today.
I'm going to expand on this one a bit, and yes it's a very controversial thing to say, But do you think that by the status that this woman had posted, and the fact that she'll be unlikely be in a condition to make a rational choice is not inviting trouble for herself ?
I'm definitely not saying that women should dress moderately and act demure, not go out and have a good time, but is she leaving herself vulnerable to potential abuse ?
My concern was for her advertising that she is going to be over drinking too.
What ever.. any bloke worth his salt would turn his nose up at this kind of behaviour anyway ...."
Unfortunately there are many men who aren't worth even a grain of salt 
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My point is that single guys get slaughtered for being on here and being false and not genuine when the majority are xx
Do you think slagging off a few women who do things you don't like will make that better?
I am not "slaging" just "quoting" and highlight why some single men will get the impression that this site is just a free for all come and get me my legs are open!!!!"
But haven't you just described a good gangbang?
As others have said, this site is for people with different ways of playing. Some want quick hot fun, and others want a close personal friendship.
I don't agree with getting so pissed you can't take care of yourself.
But hey, that's happening all the bloody time in vanilla world!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I use it to get my rocks off. I want sex. I'll get sex.
I like cock shots and fancy a fuck messages.
Makes it soooo much easier if all cards are on the table. "
Couldn't agree more |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
"My point is that single guys get slaughtered for being on here and being false and not genuine when the majority are xx
Do you think slagging off a few women who do things you don't like will make that better?
I am not "slaging" just "quoting" and highlight why some single men will get the impression that this site is just a free for all come and get me my legs are open!!!!"
Keep telling yourself that. |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
Oh and yes, anyone getting so d*unk they don't know what they are doing is putting themselves in a vulnerable position.
However, she's an adult so it's up to her to make her own decisions and deal with the consequences.
If I were to worry about everyone making choices that put them at risk, I'd be constantly in a state of panic.
Instead, I'll live my life and let these women live theirs, without feeling the need to judge them or bitch about them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There are women on the site advertising themselves in a much different way to how the OP described. If men choose to ignore those women it's nobodies fault but their own. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Oh and yes, anyone getting so d*unk they don't know what they are doing is putting themselves in a vulnerable position.
However, she's an adult so it's up to her to make her own decisions and deal with the consequences.
If I were to worry about everyone making choices that put them at risk, I'd be constantly in a state of panic.
Instead, I'll live my life and let these women live theirs, without feeling the need to judge them or bitch about them."
No one is being nasty and bitching here is more of a concern and people's perspective of what fab is about! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Surely fab is about whatever you want it to be about? If a woman goes out to get wasted and fuck then that is entirely her choice (as is her health and safety). Wether you are here to NSA screw around, find love, swing with a partner or go behind a partner's back; everyone has a story.
The only rules of swinging we get to write are our own.
V x
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Everyone on here knows their own agenda. There is no wrong or right way. People are over 18 on this site and therefore are responsible for how they represent themselves and how they conduct their swinging hobby.
It doesn't matter how fab is perceived by others. We only have to concern ourselves with how we deal with others, we will get those who swing in a similar way as we do and those who do it differently.
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Do you think guys join here all respectable then see a status like that and think 'ahhhh fuck it, lets just try to shag everyone!!!'?
Guys have their own minds and will join for their own reason, like everyone. When i joined i joined because i wanted sex....lots of it, and i got it!!
SOME guys will join here thinking its an easy way to get sex....they soon learn lol
Just because this woman put a status up saying she was getting wasted doesnt mean she is the reason men think this is instashag, the fact we all want sex is the reason some men think this is instashag lol |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Surely fab is about whatever you want it to be about? If a woman goes out to get wasted and fuck then that is entirely her choice (as is her health and safety). Wether you are here to NSA screw around, find love, swing with a partner or go behind a partner's back; everyone has a story.
The only rules of swinging we get to write are our own.
V x
"
I agree but my thread was about how single guys can perceive the site just a free for all when single women post status' like that and then they get a hard time for being on here. |
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"For the attitudes for single guys and their perception of what fab is really about... I have recently read a status of a single female saying but not to quote exactly " out on the piss will be blasted so won't know who I am or who I'm with"
What do you others think about this attitude? "
I think it's a fairly dangerous attitude to have unless you are with people who will make sure that you don't get in harm's way.
Drinking so much that you don't know who you are is daft, it's bad for your health, puts you in compromising positions and makes you do really, really stupid things. I feel that way if it's a man or a woman doing it.
Any man who thinks that a woman who says this is representative of all women doesn't know many women and if he allows himself to form an attitude about a web site from it he's in for a surprise when he gets here. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Oh and yes, anyone getting so d*unk they don't know what they are doing is putting themselves in a vulnerable position.
However, she's an adult so it's up to her to make her own decisions and deal with the consequences.
If I were to worry about everyone making choices that put them at risk, I'd be constantly in a state of panic.
Instead, I'll live my life and let these women live theirs, without feeling the need to judge them or bitch about them.
No one is being nasty and bitching here is more of a concern and people's perspective of what fab is about!"
Do you think that the men who see statuses like hers and think all women are like that would already have that opinion of women before they joined the site? There are men here who don't judge every woman on the site by a others. I don't think all men are desperate senders of one liners because I get them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes she's leaving herself vulnerable and yes it's a stupid choice but it's her choice.
I would suggest she's probably too wasted to arrange a meet anyway. and I would hope any self respecting guy wouldn't go near...
As to whether her _iew is having an impact on some men's attitude of thinking this is a guaranteed fuck shop... no I doubt it is.
Like iconic says everyone swings differently and the way we act brings us the ones who do it similar to ourselves.
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By *igSuki81Man
over a year ago
Retirement Village |
I think i get your point OP but i'd say tale from fab what you want.
Everyone on here will have a slightly different perception of what fab is & there are those who just want a one off shag with anyone they can get their hands on first.
That isn't your way OP which is fine so stick to that and dont fret about the rest.  |
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By *arry247Couple
over a year ago
Wakefield |
"For the attitudes for single guys and their perception of what fab is really about... I have recently read a status of a single female saying but not to quote exactly " out on the piss will be blasted so won't know who I am or who I'm with"
What do you others think about this attitude? "
We don't think about it. As someone once said "At this point lets all remember that swingers are meant to be the most open minded, non judgmental people there are too, so shall we ?? "
We are here to meet people with the _iew to having enjoyable NSA sex.
We are not looking to make long term friends if we happen to on the way that is a bonus.
This is not a dating site or a marriage agency but a swingers site which for the last 30 years we have been doing it means meeting people to have sex with them pure and simple. |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
"Oh and yes, anyone getting so d*unk they don't know what they are doing is putting themselves in a vulnerable position.
However, she's an adult so it's up to her to make her own decisions and deal with the consequences.
If I were to worry about everyone making choices that put them at risk, I'd be constantly in a state of panic.
Instead, I'll live my life and let these women live theirs, without feeling the need to judge them or bitch about them.
No one is being nasty and bitching here is more of a concern and people's perspective of what fab is about!"
And you aren't being judgemental of these women at all.
I see guys posting about being wasted too but you don't seem concerned about their safety.
Trying to use the actions of a few women, (who are doing nothing at all wrong anyway), as a reason to blame them for the attitudes of those men with really, really low opinions of women, is really clutching at straws.
Those poor, poor men who are confused and lead into disrespectful attitudes by a tiny number of women (irresponsible, shameless hussies!)...
There are far more women here that don't behave like that, and those men who think this place is free-hookers-r-us arrive with that notion, so no, I still don't think it's the women here that make men think like that.
Do we have a name for a female white knight yet? |
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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago
South West London / Surrey |
"For the attitudes for single guys and their perception of what fab is really about... I have recently read a status of a single female saying but not to quote exactly " out on the piss will be blasted so won't know who I am or who I'm with"
What do you others think about this attitude? "
People want different things from the site and swinging in general. No one is right or wrong how they go about things or what they want.
I think that there are too many people that try and force the 'correct way' (or what they see at correct) onto others.
If we come across those that want different things, or we dont like their attitude we move along. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I imagine that many of the women who post the spontaneous 'ready for a shag now' posts are also men! I dread to think how many men/women chats on here are, unwittingly, men/men chats..,
Oh because women couldn't possibly just want sex now. .."
?? Erm no, because there are plenty of men masquerading as women and using that tack.
Good god, there is no need to look for slurs where they don't exist. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"For the attitudes for single guys and their perception of what fab is really about... I have recently read a status of a single female saying but not to quote exactly " out on the piss will be blasted so won't know who I am or who I'm with"
What do you others think about this attitude? "
I think you are making a mistake by implying a generalisation about single guys. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Do you think maybe we generalise too much on here?"
Honestly, yes.
Not everyone, of course, but on several threads I have seen people quote one or two examples and use them to assume that they apply universally.
One of my favourite quotations is the brilliant paradox: "All generalisations are wrong". |
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"For the attitudes for single guys and their perception of what fab is really about... I have recently read a status of a single female saying but not to quote exactly " out on the piss will be blasted so won't know who I am or who I'm with"
What do you others think about this attitude? "
. From reading the status , it may be that she is just having a night out with friends , enjoying herself , and sex does not come into the equation. It would be interesting to know how old she is.
.As I am always busy and drive a lot drinking us very low in my liat of priorities . However I also accept that different people enjoy themselves in different ways .
I would be more concerned about the health issues and the impact on my liver. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"For the attitudes for single guys and their perception of what fab is really about... I have recently read a status of a single female saying but not to quote exactly " out on the piss will be blasted so won't know who I am or who I'm with"
What do you others think about this attitude? . From reading the status , it may be that she is just having a night out with friends , enjoying herself , and sex does not come into the equation. It would be interesting to know how old she is.
.As I am always busy and drive a lot drinking us very low in my liat of priorities . However I also accept that different people enjoy themselves in different ways .
I would be more concerned about the health issues and the impact on my liver."
And you are implying she goes out and gets d*unk on a regular basis by your response. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Do you think maybe we generalise too much on here?
Honestly, yes.
Not everyone, of course, but on several threads I have seen people quote one or two examples and use them to assume that they apply universally.
One of my favourite quotations is the brilliant paradox: "All generalisations are wrong"."
Spot on that Paradox. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Do you think maybe we generalise too much on here?"
Generalise & speculate way too much but I think that's the norm for a forum.
Also applies to my work enviroment |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Just because one or several women say such things, its not to say that all women here do. Men can understand that.
Stupidity can not be rationalised, irrespective of gender..
IMO xo"
What a great reply very intelligent 10 out of ten and a gold star. |
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