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Tips on keeping safe
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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So I'm in my new flat as a single woman and this is the first time in 38 (39 on wed) years I've ever lived on my own. I'm feeling ready to get back into the swing of things but I'm after tips on keeping myself safe in my flat when inviting meets round.
I'm not planning on meeting anyone here before I've meet them on mutual territory in a public place but has anyone got any other advice please xxx |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Make sure you let a friend know who you are meeting and to check in every so often...I'm sure though your resident ghost would put the willies up the men who it thought was bad...  "
Hehehe now I didn't think of that  |
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I use gut instinct, I would never invite anyone I had a tiniest weeny doubt about.
I much prefer meeting at home as it would be much easier to get out than a locked hotel room.
First meets someone always knows there coming and jay will ring me.
But to be honest I work on the fact if someone wants to rape and murder me they can do it anywhere
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I have first meets in a busy coffee shop so we can both suss each other out and if either wants to back out its easier - I always say no thanks face to face. I never say why, just that I'm not feeling a spark or lust and that's what I need.
First play meets are never at my house - if they turn into a different personality when naked I don't want them knowing where I live. I prefer first play meets to be at a hotel or club and am happy to split the cost.
I always tell my safety friend where I'm going, what time to start worrying/turn up with a baseball bat if I haven't called and also his name and username etc. I know some women who leave a note prominently in their home saying all that stuff and others who use a fab friend.
Remember that it's all optional and you can always say no. If someone is insisting that they don't want to play by your rules don't get bullied or pressured into doing things differently. Just be pleasant but firm and walk away.
One guy I'd met a few times thought he could control who else I met so he got the goodbye. Stick to your guns and stay safe. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Weapons,lots of concealed weapons in easily accessible places. You may be a terrible shot, but the euphoria of pulling out a .45 from between your ass cheeks and blasting holes all over the ceiling whilst screaming like a banshee is far better than experiencing all those horrid things that dirty dawg wanted to do.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" Weapons,lots of concealed weapons in easily accessible places. You may be a terrible shot, but the euphoria of pulling out a .45 from between your ass cheeks and blasting holes all over the ceiling whilst screaming like a banshee is far better than experiencing all those horrid things that dirty dawg wanted to do. "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm yet to invite someone round to my flat for a meet, but if I was going to, it'd be someone I already knew and not a single man.
Also, I'd let Andrew - my fwb - know who was coming round and what time I expected them to leave by. He's my "safety bitch", and regardless of who I meet off here I let him know who I'm with and where I am and when I go out and when I come home. He drives and I don't, so if I get in a dangerous situation or stranded somewhere, I can ring him to come and get me.  |
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"always leave full details of who your meeting with someone you trust. If in doubt don't risk it.
"
This is the best advice.
I told my freind,'I am bringing LovesFaceSitting who lives in London to my flat. If he kills you know where to find him. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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safe call - someone who will check in with you if you don't check in with them.
Leave real name, mobile number and car reg of person you are meeting with your safe caller... if nothing else it will give police clues if you go missing  |
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"I'm yet to invite someone round to my flat for a meet, but if I was going to, it'd be someone I already knew and not a single man.
Also, I'd let Andrew - my fwb - know who was coming round and what time I expected them to leave by. He's my "safety bitch", and regardless of who I meet off here I let him know who I'm with and where I am and when I go out and when I come home. He drives and I don't, so if I get in a dangerous situation or stranded somewhere, I can ring him to come and get me. "
My friend says she takes her mobile to bed in case someone dangerous breaks in.
I smile.
Like they'll wait for you to phone someone, I say.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"always leave full details of who your meeting with someone you trust. If in doubt don't risk it.
This is the best advice.
I told my freind,'I am bringing LovesFaceSitting who lives in London to my flat. If he kills you know where to find him. "
Darn...knew there was something about that girl "ballbustingskullcrusherthighs"...let her know I'm sending my medical bill to her in can't accommodate or travel land. |
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"safe call - someone who will check in with you if you don't check in with them.
Leave real name, mobile number and car reg of person you are meeting with your safe caller... if nothing else it will give police clues if you go missing "
If someone I met took my car number and relayed it to their friend I'd wouldn't be happy.
It's almost like a name and address.
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I don't think it's any more dangerous meeting someone from here than it is meeting a stranger in any other way.
For safety.....
1. You need a lot of common sense.
2. You need a 'feel' for people. The best sociopaths are pretty clever at evasion though.
3. Don't let the horn or how pretty he is over ride your sense of judgement.
4. If he is over pushy, overtly vulgar/sexual/touchy/creepy/slimy or you don't think you could punch his lights out in a full on fight don't go anywhere with him.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"or you don't think you could punch his lights out in a full on fight don't go anywhere with him.
"
but this means i have to write off the big muscly types that could throw me about the bedroom  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Remember your self esteem is never lower than when you fuck someone cos you didn't have the nerve to say no thanks and carry it through.
You can get by without men. Stick to the good ones. "
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"or you don't think you could punch his lights out in a full on fight don't go anywhere with him.
but this means i have to write off the big muscly types that could throw me about the bedroom "
Uhhhhhhhh yeahhhhhhh well.... you know.... there's always one worth taking the risk for  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"safe call - someone who will check in with you if you don't check in with them.
Leave real name, mobile number and car reg of person you are meeting with your safe caller... if nothing else it will give police clues if you go missing
If someone I met took my car number and relayed it to their friend I'd wouldn't be happy.
It's almost like a name and address.
"
erm... exactly |
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Live streaming your meets is about the safest.
Gut instinct - meet for fun on the second, third, whatever the meet, when you feel safe.
Neighbors may be of help too. Even if it's just letting them see your partners.
As others say, have friends who keep in contact and who know who you're meeting. Having a trace of it on fab is no bad thing.
You can record someone's car reg without having to make it very obvious. A text message to your friend or yourself keeps it linked to the meet.
Avoid those who don't really want to socialize much but go straight to sex. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't think it's any more dangerous meeting someone from here than it is meeting a stranger in any other way.
For safety.....
1. You need a lot of common sense.
2. You need a 'feel' for people. The best sociopaths are pretty clever at evasion though.
3. Don't let the horn or how pretty he is over ride your sense of judgement.
4. If he is over pushy, overtly vulgar/sexual/touchy/creepy/slimy or you don't think you could punch his lights out in a full on fight don't go anywhere with him.
"
Spot on granny c. You are always taking a risk. No bigger a risk than meeting a guy in a pub while out with your girlie mates. Use your own judgement and common sense. And keep focussed. Dont drink too much as that will let your guard down. Have a friend know as much as you can share with them. But at the same time enjoy yourself. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Hi boys n girls thank you for all your advice all excellent n taken on board
I bit the cheery tonight n had my first meet in my new flat think he was more scared then me lol
Here to many more fun but safe play dates xxx
Oh n if anyone wants to join me a townhouse let me know as that's my next cherry xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Like others have said, always have a social first before doing the deed, that way you can be absolutely sure you want to have sex with the guy. Main causes of violent acts towards women come from feelings of rejection, dented ego etc so be sure you actually want sex before inviting him to your home.
Gut instinct usually helps you suss out if someone's a bit dodgy. Tell a friend that you're having someone over, call them or take a call in front of the guy so he's well aware someone knows you have him in your home.
As for concealing weapons around your house, don't do that! If you hit an intruder with a baseball bat or stabbed someone in your bedroom even in self defence they'll do you for it, you're allowed to use reasonable force but taking a weapon to bed with the intention to use it would land you in trouble. In a bedroom you'd have to think of things that normally live in a bedroom but can double as a weapon, some large heavy decorative candle sticks holders, hairspray and a lighter so you can make your own DIY flamethrower (lighter would already be in your room to light your candles) |
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