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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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How I wake up.
Brain: C'mon you midget, you need to reach the lock to open the door.
Body: Okay, lets wake up. And just stand by the door.
Brain: Fuck it, lets go back to bed.
Body: You muppet.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How I wake up.
Brain: C'mon you midget, you need to reach the lock to open the door.
Body: Okay, lets wake up. And just stand by the door.
Brain: Fuck it, lets go back to bed.
Body: You muppet.
"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"how I wake up:
Brain: Come on, wake up!
Body: I don't want to move.
Bladder: OMG I SO NEED TO PEE!!
"
Brain: Come on, wake up!
Body: I don't want to move.
Dick: This is Sparta
Bladder: OMG I SO NEED TO PEE!!
Brain: Oh fuck I need to arch my pee into the toilet. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"how I wake up:
Brain: Come on, wake up!
Body: I don't want to move.
Bladder: OMG I SO NEED TO PEE!!
Brain: Come on, wake up!
Body: I don't want to move.
Dick: This is Sparta
Bladder: OMG I SO NEED TO PEE!!
Brain: Oh fuck I need to arch my pee into the toilet. "
Oooh tricky one!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"how I wake up:
Brain: Come on, wake up!
Body: I don't want to move.
Bladder: OMG I SO NEED TO PEE!!
Brain: Come on, wake up!
Body: I don't want to move.
Dick: This is Sparta
Bladder: OMG I SO NEED TO PEE!!
Brain: Oh fuck I need to arch my pee into the toilet.
Oooh tricky one!! "
Lucky enough I was good at Trigonometry at school I would say it's a peace of piss but that's stating the obvious |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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How I wake up.
Brain. I can hear kids,ignore them they might go away.
Body. Get the fuck off me dogs!
Brain. Quick,hide your face before they lick it.
Body. I need tea.
Bladder. Oh no you don't. |
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"how I wake up:
Brain: Come on, wake up!
Body: I don't want to move.
Bladder: OMG I SO NEED TO PEE!!
Brain: Come on, wake up!
Body: I don't want to move.
Dick: This is Sparta
Bladder: OMG I SO NEED TO PEE!!
Brain: Oh fuck I need to arch my pee into the toilet.
Oooh tricky one!!
Lucky enough I was good at Trigonometry at school I would say it's a peace of piss but that's stating the obvious "
my answer is to jump in the shower and let the shower hide the fact i'm peeing too
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My awakening routine. (In order of priority)
My cock: doing pushups against the duvet.
My brain: thinks it's Sunday...(everyday).
My body: blood deprived due to the pushups. Them Open one eye to assess if I'm home or should be asking for coffee?
Then the alarm goes off and all that changes.
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