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the Autistic gardener
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Austistic people tend to have good Artistic ideas and are perfectionists so ideal gardeners
i don't like his red hair though"
Autistic people tend to be very good at channelling large amounts of focus into particular subjects and endeavours, so as a result tend to be very creative and work well in things like art, music, design and similar fields, a big problem though is that this narrow focus tends to leave autistic people lacking in more subtle abilities like social interaction, which can lead to loneliness and isolation. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Austistic people tend to have good Artistic ideas and are perfectionists so ideal gardeners
i don't like his red hair though"
That's right they are usually gifted in being artistic and same here I don't like the red hair either. |
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By *uby0000 OP Woman
over a year ago
hertfordshire |
"Austistic people tend to have good Artistic ideas and are perfectionists so ideal gardeners
i don't like his red hair though
Autistic people tend to be very good at channelling large amounts of focus into particular subjects and endeavours, so as a result tend to be very creative and work well in things like art, music, design and similar fields, a big problem though is that this narrow focus tends to leave autistic people lacking in more subtle abilities like social interaction, which can lead to loneliness and isolation."
true ... my daughter has Aspergers syndrome and has never mixed well they see things in black and white
in their eyes we complicate things |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Aspergers syndrome is a very strange mental state to live with, your life seems to swing wildy between rainbows of creativity and black clouds of loneliness. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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...And the animals/insects will all live harmoniously in that hotel without trying to eat each other or anything at all.
It still looks pretty cool I guess though. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Austistic people tend to have good Artistic ideas and are perfectionists so ideal gardeners
i don't like his red hair though
Autistic people tend to be very good at channelling large amounts of focus into particular subjects and endeavours, so as a result tend to be very creative and work well in things like art, music, design and similar fields, a big problem though is that this narrow focus tends to leave autistic people lacking in more subtle abilities like social interaction, which can lead to loneliness and isolation.
true ... my daughter has Aspergers syndrome and has never mixed well they see things in black and white
in their eyes we complicate things "
2/4 of my children are being assessed for ASD... It's heartbreaking and hard for us all...so glad that people are finding positives in autism |
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By *uby0000 OP Woman
over a year ago
hertfordshire |
"Austistic people tend to have good Artistic ideas and are perfectionists so ideal gardeners
i don't like his red hair though
Autistic people tend to be very good at channelling large amounts of focus into particular subjects and endeavours, so as a result tend to be very creative and work well in things like art, music, design and similar fields, a big problem though is that this narrow focus tends to leave autistic people lacking in more subtle abilities like social interaction, which can lead to loneliness and isolation.
true ... my daughter has Aspergers syndrome and has never mixed well they see things in black and white
in their eyes we complicate things
2/4 of my children are being assessed for ASD... It's heartbreaking and hard for us all...so glad that people are finding positives in autism"
take all the help you are offered this bloke shows they can succeed |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"on channel 4 now gives a real insight into Autism"
My sons are Autistic, this programme only gives an insight into this Autistic person, not Autism in general, there are some familiar traits in all, but every Autistic person I`ve ever met is different, it is such a broad spectrum. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Austistic people tend to have good Artistic ideas and are perfectionists so ideal gardeners
i don't like his red hair though
Autistic people tend to be very good at channelling large amounts of focus into particular subjects and endeavours, so as a result tend to be very creative and work well in things like art, music, design and similar fields, a big problem though is that this narrow focus tends to leave autistic people lacking in more subtle abilities like social interaction, which can lead to loneliness and isolation.
true ... my daughter has Aspergers syndrome and has never mixed well they see things in black and white
in their eyes we complicate things
2/4 of my children are being assessed for ASD... It's heartbreaking and hard for us all...so glad that people are finding positives in autism"
I`ve been through that process, if you need to talk about it send me a message, genuine invite. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Totally agree. My 5 year old son is ASD and this is only a little insight into autism. "
That was the problem with the film `Rain Man¬, good film and made me aware of Autism, but people think everyone is a Raymond Babbit, people try to cheer you up by saying things like, " you might have a little Mozart", like they are all geniuses in the making. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Austistic people tend to have good Artistic ideas and are perfectionists so ideal gardeners
i don't like his red hair though
Autistic people tend to be very good at channelling large amounts of focus into particular subjects and endeavours, so as a result tend to be very creative and work well in things like art, music, design and similar fields, a big problem though is that this narrow focus tends to leave autistic people lacking in more subtle abilities like social interaction, which can lead to loneliness and isolation.
true ... my daughter has Aspergers syndrome and has never mixed well they see things in black and white
in their eyes we complicate things "
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Aspergers syndrome is a very strange mental state to live with, your life seems to swing wildy between rainbows of creativity and black clouds of loneliness."
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"Aspergers syndrome is a very strange mental state to live with, your life seems to swing wildy between rainbows of creativity and black clouds of loneliness."
Are you an Aspie? I think you've been asked before. I don't relate to that statement. It can't be strange for an Aspie. It's normal. It's everyone else that's strange - hence the inpaired theory of mind. My son is high functioning ASC and his life doesn't swing between peaks and troughs like a neuro-typical person does. He coasts through life on a boring (to me) plateau most of the time. |
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By *uby0000 OP Woman
over a year ago
hertfordshire |
"Aspergers syndrome is a very strange mental state to live with, your life seems to swing wildy between rainbows of creativity and black clouds of loneliness.
Are you an Aspie? I think you've been asked before. I don't relate to that statement. It can't be strange for an Aspie. It's normal. It's everyone else that's strange - hence the inpaired theory of mind. My son is high functioning ASC and his life doesn't swing between peaks and troughs like a neuro-typical person does. He coasts through life on a boring (to me) plateau most of the time. "
unfortunately depression can occur in a lot of adults with Aspergers |
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By *ommy26.Man
over a year ago
Sheffield |
I am part of a youth forum and we go out to residential properties and do some gardening with a wide range of children and their needs, I find it helps the individuals within the garden to relax and explore the textures and smells, |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Big up to all parents out there with children and young people, wherever they are on the spectrum. I have fam with Autism. Also worked in a centre for 7 years, with children and yp with mainly Autism. The best years of my life. We may have only had 3 children in or up to 9. The amount of planning that went into this was huge. We had laughter, tears, joy, fun, followed by tantrums, sleepless nights, black eyes, bruised arms, broken limbs, (staff), a unique insight into their world. What I most remember was the individual personality of each child, and parents who were at breaking point, due to the long waiting lists for services.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Aspergers syndrome is a very strange mental state to live with, your life seems to swing wildy between rainbows of creativity and black clouds of loneliness.
Are you an Aspie? I think you've been asked before. I don't relate to that statement. It can't be strange for an Aspie. It's normal. It's everyone else that's strange - hence the inpaired theory of mind. My son is high functioning ASC and his life doesn't swing between peaks and troughs like a neuro-typical person does. He coasts through life on a boring (to me) plateau most of the time. "
I may as well be honest, yes, unfortunately I am an Aspergers sufferer. I can't speak for everyone with my experiences with the condition, but its something I've always regretted having. The eccentricities that come with it some people find fascinating, but it seems the majority find us creepy, weird or even intimidating. |
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By *eavenNhellCouple
over a year ago
carrbrook stalybridge |
For those with children displaying any symptoms on the autistic spectrum we found ADDERS.org to be realy usefull lots of folk going through the same thing all helping and supporting each other |
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"Aspergers syndrome is a very strange mental state to live with, your life seems to swing wildy between rainbows of creativity and black clouds of loneliness.
Are you an Aspie? I think you've been asked before. I don't relate to that statement. It can't be strange for an Aspie. It's normal. It's everyone else
that's strange - hence the inpaired
theory of mind. My son is high
functioning ASC and his life doesn't
swing between peaks and troughs like
a neuro-typical person does. He coasts Brightonthrough life on a boring (to me)
plateau most of the time.
I may as well be honest, yes,
unfortunately I am an Aspergers
sufferer. I can't speak for everyone with
my experiences with the condition, but
its something I've always regretted
having. The eccentricities that come
with it some people find fascinating, but mit seems the majority find us creepy,
weird or even intimidating."
It's not accurate to say people 'suffer' from it. It's a condition not an illness. I've never heard of anyone with ASC regretting that fact they have it simply because they have that impairment of mind. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Austistic people tend to have good Artistic ideas and are perfectionists so ideal gardeners
i don't like his red hair though
Autistic people tend to be very good at channelling large amounts of focus into particular subjects and endeavours, so as a result tend to be very creative and work well in things like art, music, design and similar fields, a big problem though is that this narrow focus tends to leave autistic people lacking in more subtle abilities like social interaction, which can lead to loneliness and isolation.
true ... my daughter has Aspergers syndrome and has never mixed well they see things in black and white
in their eyes we complicate things
2/4 of my children are being assessed for ASD... It's heartbreaking and hard for us all...so glad that people are finding positives in autism"
My son is 4 and has just been diagnosed if you need a chat just message me xxxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I really loved there garden and would pay them to come and do my own . Alan Gardener had lovely red nails to go with his red hair looked a bit like a punk. He is very different in his outlook I liked that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Aspergers syndrome is a very strange mental state to live with, your life seems to swing wildy between rainbows of creativity and black clouds of loneliness.
Are you an Aspie? I think you've been asked before. I don't relate to that statement. It can't be strange for an Aspie. It's normal. It's everyone else
that's strange - hence the inpaired
theory of mind. My son is high
functioning ASC and his life doesn't
swing between peaks and troughs like
a neuro-typical person does. He coasts Brightonthrough life on a boring (to me)
plateau most of the time.
I may as well be honest, yes,
unfortunately I am an Aspergers
sufferer. I can't speak for everyone with
my experiences with the condition, but
its something I've always regretted
having. The eccentricities that come
with it some people find fascinating, but mit seems the majority find us creepy,
weird or even intimidating.
It's not accurate to say people 'suffer' from it. It's a condition not an illness. I've never heard of anyone with ASC regretting that fact they have it simply because they have that impairment of mind. "
some might say that they suffer because some people view them as having an impaired mind rather than being different and gifted. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Aspergers syndrome is a very strange mental state to live with, your life seems to swing wildy between rainbows of creativity and black clouds of loneliness.
Are you an Aspie? I think you've been asked before. I don't relate to that statement. It can't be strange for an Aspie. It's normal. It's everyone else
that's strange - hence the inpaired
theory of mind. My son is high
functioning ASC and his life doesn't
swing between peaks and troughs like
a neuro-typical person does. He coasts Brightonthrough life on a boring (to me)
plateau most of the time.
I may as well be honest, yes,
unfortunately I am an Aspergers
sufferer. I can't speak for everyone with
my experiences with the condition, but
its something I've always regretted
having. The eccentricities that come
with it some people find fascinating, but mit seems the majority find us creepy,
weird or even intimidating.
It's not accurate to say people 'suffer' from it. It's a condition not an illness. I've never heard of anyone with ASC regretting that fact they have it simply because they have that impairment of mind. "
As I mentioned, I can only refer to my personal experiences, but as Paula said, it's not so much the condition itself, but rather the issues that arise from it such as social isolation, alienation and exclusion that cause the problems. I'm sure many Aspergers sufferers have gone on to live full and happy lives in spite of their eccentricities, perhaps as a result of the support they've received, the people they've been fortunate enough to have as friends and relations, or pursuing some avenue in life which favoured their uniqueness, but personally I've found much of my life a struggle up to this point, and have had to overcome a great deal of emotional and personal problems throughout. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Aspergers syndrome is a very strange mental state to live with, your life seems to swing wildy between rainbows of creativity and black clouds of loneliness.
Are you an Aspie? I think you've been asked before. I don't relate to that statement. It can't be strange for an Aspie. It's normal. It's everyone else
that's strange - hence the inpaired
theory of mind. My son is high
functioning ASC and his life doesn't
swing between peaks and troughs like
a neuro-typical person does. He coasts Brightonthrough life on a boring (to me)
plateau most of the time.
I may as well be honest, yes,
unfortunately I am an Aspergers
sufferer. I can't speak for everyone with
my experiences with the condition, but
its something I've always regretted
having. The eccentricities that come
with it some people find fascinating, but mit seems the majority find us creepy,
weird or even intimidating.
It's not accurate to say people 'suffer' from it. It's a condition not an illness. I've never heard of anyone with ASC regretting that fact they have it simply because they have that impairment of mind.
As I mentioned, I can only refer to my personal experiences, but as Paula said, it's not so much the condition itself, but rather the issues that arise from it such as social isolation, alienation and exclusion that cause the problems. I'm sure many Aspergers sufferers have gone on to live full and happy lives in spite of their eccentricities, perhaps as a result of the support they've received, the people they've been fortunate enough to have as friends and relations, or pursuing some avenue in life which favoured their uniqueness, but personally I've found much of my life a struggle up to this point, and have had to overcome a great deal of emotional and personal problems throughout."
I was diagnosed with non-evident asperger traits a couple of years back. It explained a lot. 'Suffer' is exactly the right word.
I think maybe as its a spectrum disorder people with just a touch of it suffer the most as those with more can seem quite happy to be alone in life. We crave companionship but can come across as closed off so find it hard to attract people. This leads to the crippling loneliness caused by lack of intimate relationships.
I myself find it easy to connect with people emotionally but I can come off weird if I'm having a low confidence day which makes it difficult for them to connect with me. Thats how it feels anyway.
'Creepy' was an interesting choice of word. Have you got the intense stare as well?
Social interaction is of course difficult. Even here on the Fab I find it difficult with women being a nightmare to figure out 
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Aspergers syndrome is a very strange mental state to live with, your life seems to swing wildy between rainbows of creativity and black clouds of loneliness."
I'm an aspie and you've summed up my lived experience perfectly. I also happen to be a gardener by trade  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I was diagnosed with non-evident asperger traits a couple of years back. It explained a lot. 'Suffer' is exactly the right word."
I often think that its not (always) so much the condition itself we suffer with, but rather the results of how society views us and our different way of thinking. Humans are social beings, and yet we often struggle with social interaction, not because we're stupid or unpleasant, but we simply don't 'get' so much of what makes others tick.
An analogy I use is its a bit like breathing and blinking, you don't know HOW you do these things, you just do - socialising to an Aspergers person, at least as I see it, is like having to be taught those automatic things.
"We crave companionship but can come across as closed off so find it hard to attract people. This leads to the crippling loneliness caused by lack of intimate relationships."
I understand fully what you mean, personally I find my emotions swing between me being as cold and detached as a robot, to feeling such a longing for someone that it's as though I'd gladly tear my heart from my own chest and fall to my knees bleeding if I could just live long enough to see her take it from my bloody hands and say she loves me too (yes that morbidly sweet scene is another very aspie thing to describe).
"I myself find it easy to connect with people emotionally but I can come off weird if I'm having a low confidence day which makes it difficult for them to connect with me. Thats how it feels anyway."
You say 'low confidence day', have you ever had times in your life when you were the opposite, and managed to have an entire group of strangers hanging off your every word? If so, how did you feel?
"'Creepy' was an interesting choice of word. Have you got the intense stare as well?"
Yep, read my verifications...people who like me describe my eyes as 'striking', those who don't 'psychotic/murderous' and similar. Almost every meet I've had commented on them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Aspergers syndrome is a very strange mental state to live with, your life seems to swing wildy between rainbows of creativity and black clouds of loneliness.
I'm an aspie and you've summed up my lived experience perfectly. I also happen to be a gardener by trade "
I'm glad you say that, if anything, at least it means other Aspies understand each other! 
You know that Aspergers is supposedly a lot rarer in women than men? Daryl Hannah is a suffer too they say. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Aspergers syndrome is a very strange mental state to live with, your life seems to swing wildy between rainbows of creativity and black clouds of loneliness.
I'm an aspie and you've summed up my lived experience perfectly. I also happen to be a gardener by trade
I'm glad you say that, if anything, at least it means other Aspies understand each other!
You know that Aspergers is supposedly a lot rarer in women than men? Daryl Hannah is a suffer too they say."
I think actually it's just as common but harder to detect. Women seem to develop masking mechanisms much more successfully than men, whether that's due to innate gender differences or social conditioning is up for debate. I can 'pass' for 'normal' and nobody would suspect a thing.x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Aspergers syndrome is a very strange mental state to live with, your life seems to swing wildy between rainbows of creativity and black clouds of loneliness.
I'm an aspie and you've summed up my lived experience perfectly. I also happen to be a gardener by trade
I'm glad you say that, if anything, at least it means other Aspies understand each other!
You know that Aspergers is supposedly a lot rarer in women than men? Daryl Hannah is a suffer too they say.
I think actually it's just as common but harder to detect. Women seem to develop masking mechanisms much more successfully than men, whether that's due to innate gender differences or social conditioning is up for debate. I can 'pass' for 'normal' and nobody would suspect a thing.x"
Either that or guys just don't get women anyway  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I understand fully what you mean, personally I find my emotions swing between me being as cold and detached as a robot, to feeling such a longing for someone that it's as though I'd gladly tear my heart from my own chest and fall to my knees bleeding if I could just live long enough to see her take it from my bloody hands and say she loves me too (yes that morbidly sweet scene is another very aspie thing to describe)."
Haha yeah I have had the exact same thoughts!
"You say 'low confidence day', have you ever had times in your life when you were the opposite, and managed to have an entire group of strangers hanging off your every word? If so, how did you feel?"
I can have the opposite as long as I'm very comfortable in my environment and the people in it. In my last fulltime job I was described as charasmatic and was the funny one in the office. Its a great feeling. A negative life event can cause longterm differences in how I come across though. I've rarely been able to fully relax and be myself with new people or in pubs and places with crowds but that may be more to do with social anxiety.
"Yep, read my verifications...people who like me describe my eyes as 'striking', those who don't 'psychotic/murderous' and similar. Almost every meet I've had commented on them."
What colour are your eyes? Mine are kinda pale blue so you can imagine how piercing they can seem. I had a thousand yard stare by age 14 
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think actually it's just as common but harder to detect. Women seem to develop masking mechanisms much more successfully than men, whether that's due to innate gender differences or social conditioning is up for debate. I can 'pass' for 'normal' and nobody would suspect a thing.x"
I read that it is likely due to social factors. For instance women are accepted into groups of people a lot more readily than men are.
Also my own observation is that it can be compared to shyness with the opposite sex fairly easily. A shy woman in a club will still have men hitting on her raising her confidence and if she is up for it can easily get a guy to go home with her.
Compare that to being a shy guy when its guys that are, generally, expected to always make the first move.
Then add that to being blind to any flirty looks that may come your way.
Women have a far easier time within society than men in my observations. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think actually it's just as common but harder to detect. Women seem to develop masking mechanisms much more successfully than men, whether that's due to innate gender differences or social conditioning is up for debate. I can 'pass' for 'normal' and nobody would suspect a thing.x
I read that it is likely due to social factors. For instance women are accepted into groups of people a lot more readily than men are.
Also my own observation is that it can be compared to shyness with the opposite sex fairly easily. A shy woman in a club will still have men hitting on her raising her confidence and if she is up for it can easily get a guy to go home with her.
Compare that to being a shy guy when its guys that are, generally, expected to always make the first move.
Then add that to being blind to any flirty looks that may come your way.
Women have a far easier time within society than men in my observations."
Well actually I believe the opposite to be true. As a small child I was taught that as a girl I must be compliant, pleasing and polite at all times. It was my job to put others at ease and to never cause a fuss. My brother had no such expectations hoisted upon him, as being a male he was permitted to be unusual, odd, lacking in social skills, quirky. He was 'forgiven' if you like, whereas I was not. I have learned to mask but only because I was forced to quash my true nature in order to comply with the very limited and specific female role society had chosen for me. As adults guess who has more self confidence and higher self-esteem? Yes, the one who was allowed to be themselves as a child. It has not been easy. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Well actually I believe the opposite to be true. As a small child I was taught that as a girl I must be compliant, pleasing and polite at all times. It was my job to put others at ease and to never cause a fuss. My brother had no such expectations hoisted upon him, as being a male he was permitted to be unusual, odd, lacking in social skills, quirky. He was 'forgiven' if you like, whereas I was not. I have learned to mask but only because I was forced to quash my true nature in order to comply with the very limited and specific female role society had chosen for me. As adults guess who has more self confidence and higher self-esteem? Yes, the one who was allowed to be themselves as a child. It has not been easy."
I'd disagree, throughout my childhood and teens, I was constantly mocked for being weird, always isolated and when forced into group work, relegated to be amongst the other misfits. Plenty of girls though, regardless of their schoolyard status in terms of looks or personality had far fewer issues fitting in, had groups of friends, boyfriends etc. That's something I think so many girls take from granted, males are so genetically predisposed to seek YOU out, that'll they'll often forgive you for unusual qualities that would lead a guy into the kind of outcast status that I so often found myself in.
I remember once having a discussion with a girl, who was of the belief that guys and girls are largely treated the same in society, to which I asked her, out of her male and female friends, which had the most singles? You guessed it - MALES.
Life is an uphill struggle for a man to prove himself and his worth, to find where he fits in, imagine how hard that is when your mind works in a way so many in society find alien, and you can see why Autistic males often have such a rough ride. |
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