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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Never works for me, always drink too much and fall asleep!  "
A d*unk person can't give proper consent, so I'm not ok with having sex with a d*unk person. |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
Not for me. Since starting this I have had one man get d*unk really rapidly and in my bed (one of the reasons I don't accommodate any more). I couldn't throw him out and it was bloody awful.
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"Never works for me, always drink too much and fall asleep!
A d*unk person can't give proper consent, so I'm not ok with having sex with a d*unk person."
even in a secure long term relationship where you know each other intimately ?
or where 'earlier on' you were both all over each other the one of you had that little night cap..? |
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"Never works for me, always drink too much and fall asleep!
A d*unk person can't give proper consent, so I'm not ok with having sex with a d*unk person."
So you've never had sex after a few drinks with any of your partners?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Never works for me, always drink too much and fall asleep!
A d*unk person can't give proper consent, so I'm not ok with having sex with a d*unk person.
even in a secure long term relationship where you know each other intimately ?
or where 'earlier on' you were both all over each other the one of you had that little night cap..? "
None of my long term partners drink, so I've not had to make that decision.
I doubt it though, unless I had a specific consensual non-consent arrangement in place as part of a BDSM arrangement. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Never works for me, always drink too much and fall asleep!
A d*unk person can't give proper consent, so I'm not ok with having sex with a d*unk person.
So you've never had sex after a few drinks with any of your partners?
"
Not since I was about 19, no. |
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"Never works for me, always drink too much and fall asleep!
A d*unk person can't give proper consent, so I'm not ok with having sex with a d*unk person.
So you've never had sex after a few drinks with any of your partners?
Not since I was about 19, no."
Fair enough. |
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"Never works for me, always drink too much and fall asleep!
A d*unk person can't give proper consent, so I'm not ok with having sex with a d*unk person.
even in a secure long term relationship where you know each other intimately ?
or where 'earlier on' you were both all over each other the one of you had that little night cap..?
None of my long term partners drink, so I've not had to make that decision.
I doubt it though, unless I had a specific consensual non-consent arrangement in place as part of a BDSM arrangement."
signed in triplicate and witnessed by a third party..?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Never works for me, always drink too much and fall asleep!
A d*unk person can't give proper consent, so I'm not ok with having sex with a d*unk person.
even in a secure long term relationship where you know each other intimately ?
or where 'earlier on' you were both all over each other the one of you had that little night cap..?
None of my long term partners drink, so I've not had to make that decision.
I doubt it though, unless I had a specific consensual non-consent arrangement in place as part of a BDSM arrangement.
signed in triplicate and witnessed by a third party..?
"
Clearly not, no.
But unless unconsensual sex has been negotiated in advance, then it's just not something I want to do. |
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"Never works for me, always drink too much and fall asleep!
A d*unk person can't give proper consent, so I'm not ok with having sex with a d*unk person.
even in a secure long term relationship where you know each other intimately ?
or where 'earlier on' you were both all over each other the one of you had that little night cap..?
None of my long term partners drink, so I've not had to make that decision.
I doubt it though, unless I had a specific consensual non-consent arrangement in place as part of a BDSM arrangement.
signed in triplicate and witnessed by a third party..?
Clearly not, no.
But unless unconsensual sex has been negotiated in advance, then it's just not something I want to do."
You make sex sound so clinical. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
You make sex sound so clinical. "
Because I care that my partners are fully coherent and are both agreeing to and enjoying sex?
I guess I'm ok with sounding clinical then. |
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"Never works for me, always drink too much and fall asleep!
A d*unk person can't give proper consent, so I'm not ok with having sex with a d*unk person.
even in a secure long term relationship where you know each other intimately ?
or where 'earlier on' you were both all over each other the one of you had that little night cap..?
None of my long term partners drink, so I've not had to make that decision.
I doubt it though, unless I had a specific consensual non-consent arrangement in place as part of a BDSM arrangement.
signed in triplicate and witnessed by a third party..?
Clearly not, no.
But unless unconsensual sex has been negotiated in advance, then it's just not something I want to do."
my previous comment was sort of tongue in cheek but it does seem like it inhibits any spontaneity within a relationship where two people are already past the shall we stage..
respect thats your position..
also as we all know there are various stages of 'd*unkenness' from the slightly tiddly to the no idea whats going on etc.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Never works for me, always drink too much and fall asleep!
A d*unk person can't give proper consent, so I'm not ok with having sex with a d*unk person.
even in a secure long term relationship where you know each other intimately ?
or where 'earlier on' you were both all over each other the one of you had that little night cap..?
None of my long term partners drink, so I've not had to make that decision.
I doubt it though, unless I had a specific consensual non-consent arrangement in place as part of a BDSM arrangement.
signed in triplicate and witnessed by a third party..?
Clearly not, no.
But unless unconsensual sex has been negotiated in advance, then it's just not something I want to do.
my previous comment was sort of tongue in cheek but it does seem like it inhibits any spontaneity within a relationship where two people are already past the shall we stage..
respect thats your position..
also as we all know there are various stages of 'd*unkenness' from the slightly tiddly to the no idea whats going on etc.."
That's absolutely fair.
I don't really drink, so one drink and I don't feel in control of myself.
My partners are the same. Therefore I wouldn't like to assume that they were happy having sex if they weren't quite thinking straight.
With someone new, I wouldn't have sex if they'd been drinking. Because I don't know if they are like me - and unable to consent properly after a d*unk - or if they are someone who would happily drink ten pints and still know their name. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Never works for me, always drink too much and fall asleep!
A d*unk person can't give proper consent, so I'm not ok with having sex with a d*unk person.
even in a secure long term relationship where you know each other intimately ?
or where 'earlier on' you were both all over each other the one of you had that little night cap..?
None of my long term partners drink, so I've not had to make that decision.
I doubt it though, unless I had a specific consensual non-consent arrangement in place as part of a BDSM arrangement.
signed in triplicate and witnessed by a third party..?
Clearly not, no.
But unless unconsensual sex has been negotiated in advance, then it's just not something I want to do."
Unconsensual sex by negotiation? Isn't that consent.
Yer not pissed are yer?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Unconsensual sex by negotiation? Isn't that consent.
Yer not pissed are yer?
"
CNC or consensual non-consent is a specify activity within the kink world. Yeah it has a dumb name, but I don't have the energy to start the campaign to change it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"d*unk - or if they are someone who would happily drink ten pints and still know their name."
Interesting point.
Are they d*unk though if they can still remember their name?
Or remember they left the pizza in the taxi and stroll out, more than adequately, to retrieve it? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The legal position is clear that a d*unk person cannot consent to sex. It has mainly been discussed in the situation of rape of a woman when the d*unkeness of the men was not taken into account as a defence.
The factual issues in regard to what is too d*unk to consent as far as I know I have not been looked into. As there are no time boundaries to prosecution of sexual offences any 'd*unken fun' at any time in the past may be potentially prosecutable if the partner says they were too d*unk to consent. Someone mentioned earlier about newly weds and that early relationship wildness. The relationship between the parties is no defence i.e. husband and wife, boyfriend and girlfriend is no defence to rape. Although I am only commentatng from general reading and a criminal lawyer would be able to give a better view of the law. But a clearly discussed consent absent of drink drugs and pressure is required. Hence Wasp's protocol may be the way forward. But certainly it seems wise to avoid d*unken fun and hope noone holds past d*unken fun against you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"d*unk - or if they are someone who would happily drink ten pints and still know their name.
Interesting point.
Are they d*unk though if they can still remember their name?
Or remember they left the pizza in the taxi and stroll out, more than adequately, to retrieve it? "
Oooo controversial. Appeal is soon in that case isn't it? |
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I don't really drink anyway but I think one or two to relax you is ok. I couldn't think of anything worse than having sex d*unk. I see no fun in that at all. I like to be fully aware of what I'm doing and want to savour the moment. |
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"
You make sex sound so clinical.
Because I care that my partners are fully coherent and are both agreeing to and enjoying sex?
I guess I'm ok with sounding clinical then."
Whatever works for you. I care too but perhaps just show it differently. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Personally won't do it for the aforementioned consent reason and agree if someone is wasted they are not at their most attractive, tipsy is good though as long as they are coherent and making sound decisions.. the lack of inhibitions can lead too some great experiences. |
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though I do drink on my meets 
