Is it just me or are people my age all just too damaged by there past to be honest and have a proper relationship ?
Why do people string you along knowing full well they don't feel the same as you ?
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"I been single all my life and enjoying it so don't got a past with a woman, keep it casual sex "
I find casual sex gets boring after a short while , much prefer the closeness of a loving relationship. |
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By *iewMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Angus & Findhorn |
"I guess people but I'm only interested in women so thats my experience.
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Having read a lot of the forums over many years, there is certainly a lot of hurt out there. People may have trust issues and rather hold back as they are unsure who they can trust.
Not excusing the people who do manipulate and will lie but i do think they will be in the minority, behind the hurt and vulnerable |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"nothing to do with monogamy , its to do with people being honest about there feelings
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Oh ok. Feelings are confusing and change all the time. Sometimes i'm well into a guy and next minute i have no interest in bothering with him. No idea why this happens either. |
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"but in saying that, I do also think people confuse infatuation/attention/NSA/forum stroking with genuine feelings......"
Not really sure what you mean by that?
Whats happened with me is nothing to do with this site /infatuation or forum stroking whatever that is . |
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By *iewMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Angus & Findhorn |
"but in saying that, I do also think people confuse infatuation/attention/NSA/forum stroking with genuine feelings......
Not really sure what you mean by that?
Whats happened with me is nothing to do with this site /infatuation or forum stroking whatever that is ."
I never said the above was about you, I don't know you or your situation... I am speaking to the general question in your OP.
if you want feedback on your situation, give us the detail so we have context |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"nothing to do with monogamy , its to do with people being honest about there feelings
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It's difficult to comment, as it sounds like you've been hurt - but we don't know the whole story. For me, honesty is first and foremost at all times. If you don't have that , you have no basis for a relationship. Some people though, don't know how they feel - so they're not meaning to be dishonest. They just find feelings etc difficult. That can be for any number of reasons. |
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"Yes. All 41 year olds are damaged.
Best let my 40 year old partner know so that he can prepare for the coming of his next birthday."
I detect a hint of sarcasm there ...... in hindsight it does sound like a crap way of phrasing the question! |
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"nothing to do with monogamy , its to do with people being honest about there feelings
It's difficult to comment, as it sounds like you've been hurt - but we don't know the whole story. For me, honesty is first and foremost at all times. If you don't have that , you have no basis for a relationship. Some people though, don't know how they feel - so they're not meaning to be dishonest
. They just find feelings etc difficult. That can be for any number of reasons. "
I get where your coming from , i guess i just hate the fact that I pride myself on being totally honest about my feelings and the favour isn't returned , seems people think nothing of playing games without thinking about how it may hurt somebody .
Dating sucks ! |
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To be fair, this is not the first site I would think of if I was looking for relationship advise. Most people on here were already in a strong relationship before they joined, or are not looking for one |
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"Is it just me or are people my age all just too damaged by there past to be honest and have a proper relationship ?
Why do people string you along knowing full well they don't feel the same as you ?
"
Not everyone is damaged but I do think that we are inclined to think that our normality is everyone else's too.
I'm lucky in that I have survived relatively emotionally unscathed from the hurly burly of my life and tend to think that everyone will have.
People have many reasons for stringing others along, sometimes they are so low on self esteem themselves that they find it difficult to believe that anyone could love them. |
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"To be fair, this is not the first site I would think of if I was looking for relationship advise. Most people on here were already in a strong relationship before they joined, or are not looking for one "
Surely that makes it a very good place to come for advice! |
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