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Pun Jokes

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By *onConformistLikeU OP   Man  over a year ago

Chorley

Did you hear about the communist napkin?

It joined the serviette union.

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By *yrdwomanWoman  over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

I don't think that strictly counts as a pun.

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By *hyllyphyllyMan  over a year ago

Bradford

If you can imaging Tim Vine saying it, then it counts

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Did you hear about the communist napkin?

It joined the serviette union. "

That's an amazing joke!!! God I love shit jokes

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By *onConformistLikeU OP   Man  over a year ago

Chorley

I was wondering why the ball kept getting bigger and bigger, then it hit me.

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By *vbride1963TV/TS  over a year ago

E.K . Glasgow

My blind girlfriend said I had the biggest pnis she'd ever felt , I said your pulling my leg

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

A woman goes into a bar and asks for a double entendre ...so the barman gives her one !

Yes not a pun but who cares

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I was going to tell a sodium and hydrogen pun. But NaH.

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By *ikki ShooterTV/TS  over a year ago

Epsom


"I was going to tell a sodium and hydrogen pun. But NaH. "

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By *ranny-CrumpetWoman  over a year ago

The Town by The Cross

I'm reading a book on Anti Gravity. Just can't put it down.............

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

This afternoon a 3 year old has been charged by the Police for resisting a rest.

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By *inaTitzTV/TS  over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

The other week I saw a comedian doing Christmas cracker jokes. It was painful. Only Tim Vine could have carried those off.

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By *onConformistLikeU OP   Man  over a year ago

Chorley

I wasn't going to tell a gay joke, butt fuck it.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

My mate tried to chat up a hotty in a pub last night hoping for some chemistry. He didn't get a reaction.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Bridge by ours closed for two hours today just because somebody left a ball of wool on it... Police thought it could have been a potential jumper

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

a roman walks into a pub and holds up two fingers.

"5 pints bar keep" he says.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Sorry that wasn't a pun but it was the best I could do (

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

a higgs boson walks into a church.

"you cannot come in here" says the priest.

"but without me there can be no mass" replies the boson.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Does Sean Connery like herbs? Only partially

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By *onyneMan  over a year ago

Newcastle

A newspaper reporter wrote his ten best pun headlines to see if any got printed...

but no pun in ten did

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"A newspaper reporter wrote his ten best pun headlines to see if any got printed...

but no pun in ten did"

ow that was physically painful.

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By *onyneMan  over a year ago

Newcastle


"A newspaper reporter wrote his ten best pun headlines to see if any got printed...

but no pun in ten did

ow that was physically painful.

"

I know...that's why it's so good!

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By *hyllyphyllyMan  over a year ago

Bradford


"Bridge by ours closed for two hours today just because somebody left a ball of wool on it... Police thought it could have been a potential jumper "

My favourite one so far

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I got kicked out of the swimming pool last week... The breaststroke wasnt what I thought it'll be

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

All these should go to the old jokes home

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

And in other news Prince William is in hospital with multiple bullet wounds, after joining army manoeuvres and the troops were ordered to "Fire At Will".

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Jonathon Ross got arrested today for nicking a food mixer from asda.

He told the police. " it was a whisk he was willing to take "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I like pun jokes but not ones about nazis. They're just not reich. Anne Frankly I don't care for them.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

2 blondes walk into a building

thought one of them would have seen it

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I was doing 50 in a 30 zone when a policeman stepped into the rd with his had outstretched

He was never going to be strong enough!!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

My mate overdosed on indigestion medicine

I can't believe Gav is gon

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By *illymint45Man  over a year ago

Cheshire

2 parrots sat on a perch, one turned to the other and said can you smell fish?

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By *illymint45Man  over a year ago

Cheshire

Dropped a piano down a mineshaft and got a flat minor

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By *hyandtwistedCouple  over a year ago

loughborough

What's a Yankee?

Same as a quickie but a guy can do it alone.

More a riddle than pun but it will do

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Why did the girl thought the cook was mean?

She saw him beating eggs and whipping cream!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

This has been a great lol thanks jokers. sorry I haven't got any to hand

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By *onConformistLikeU OP   Man  over a year ago

Chorley

I tried BDSM, Necrophilia and Bestiality until I realised I was flogging a dead horse.

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By *illymint45Man  over a year ago

Cheshire

Why do elephants paint there balls red?

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By *illymint45Man  over a year ago

Cheshire

So they can hide in cherry trees

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By *illymint45Man  over a year ago

Cheshire

What's the loudest sound in the jungle?

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By *illymint45Man  over a year ago

Cheshire

A giraffe eating cherries

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