Have real concern about a younger male work colleague.
Workroom banter over heard few guys joking about this guy saying he was pay £300 per session with escorts.
Did not join in, but senced something was not right.
Got to know this guy, then discreetly asked him, who was open and honest went on to say that due to still living at home had to do it fron hotel away trips to.
Initially not knowing his debt problems I warned him to be cautious.
Only for him a weeks later informing me that his bank has called him in. Understands that he is the architect of own problems but says just can,t help himself.
Addiction habit comes to mind.
Only wish i,d learnt of his activities earlier ... he has real problems.
I, ve told him he won,t be able to do it by himself and needs to accept he has a problem.
Fortunately he is not in a relationship or has children so it is only him affected. Though no doubt it will be devastating news ti his mother..... I,ve offered to be with him or talk to his mother on his behalf should he decide to do so..
Any suggestions please....
He is actually a nice guy...not sure how else I can help.Such a shame.
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By *oodmessMan
over a year ago
yumsville |
Counselling and tell him to print off all his bank statements showing where he has withdrawn money to pay for these types of services. Tell him to do it for the entire year and highlight the debits in yellow marker - with asterisks?
It may be able to relate the regularity and amount on paper he is actually spending right in front of him |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Refer him to stepchange and let them do what they're trained to do.
A"
Debt and addiction won't be solved by you talking to his mother. He needs to learn to fix this himself or he will go back there.
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"Refer him to stepchange and let them do what they're trained to do.
A
Debt and addiction won't be solved by you talking to his mother. He needs to learn to fix this himself or he will go back there.
" yes your right i,m sure that will be the case.
It needs a joined up approach and himself accepting the problem.
Though with out anyone close to him who he can trust and confide in its going to be tough self guidance.
Prior to this I would never of guessed some one of his looks, age and confidence could be a victim of this.
It make me fearfull how many more are out there.. |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"Refer him to stepchange and let them do what they're trained to do.
A
Debt and addiction won't be solved by you talking to his mother. He needs to learn to fix this himself or he will go back there.
yes your right i,m sure that will be the case.
It needs a joined up approach and himself accepting the problem.
Though with out anyone close to him who he can trust and confide in its going to be tough self guidance.
Prior to this I would never of guessed some one of his looks, age and confidence could be a victim of this.
It make me fearfull how many more are out there.."
Debt is difficult to admit. For drugs and alcohol, possibly even sex addiction, people will accept disease. For debt we're just feckless.
It is possible to recover but my experience is that being bailed out is not the answer. You have to do the work and feel that change.
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"Refer him to stepchange and let them do what they're trained to do.
A
Debt and addiction won't be solved by you talking to his mother. He needs to learn to fix this himself or he will go back there.
yes your right i,m sure that will be the case.
It needs a joined up approach and himself accepting the problem.
Though with out anyone close to him who he can trust and confide in its going to be tough self guidance.
Prior to this I would never of guessed some one of his looks, age and confidence could be a victim of this.
It make me fearfull how many more are out there..
Debt is difficult to admit. For drugs and alcohol, possibly even sex addiction, people will accept disease. For debt we're just feckless.
It is possible to recover but my experience is that being bailed out is not the answer. You have to do the work and feel that change.
" yes he has have a good look at himself and answer some tough questions.
Odd though get the impression although an addiction, out of alcohol, drugs, gambling, stigma wise is probabley the hardest to admit to. Yet out of the rest it is though ' warped' the most natural basic need.
Strange. |
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I suppose the reason i,ve taken pity on him is because when I was growing up the internet was in its infantsy.
Young men now with easy access and exsposure to certain websites for working girls it so convenient.
Along with the amonymity it provides I wonder whether I, as a young guy could of succumb to this fate?? |
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