FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Do you sometimes judge
Do you sometimes judge
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Many of us use the forums and chatrooms, everyone doesnt get on with everyone (no issues with that)
Do you judge people on forums posts and chatroom chats. Or are you a give everyone a chance.
I admit I have and been proved wrong before
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
I judge very few people based on forum posts - but some have such strong opinions, often such as I find offensive, distasteful or rude, that it's sometimes impossible not to.
I've formed many an opinion though over the years and pleased to say that upon meeting in person that I've usually made a sound assessment and that people are as pleasant as they come across on here.
I'm sure I've been judged on my posts on many an occasion - and that's fine.
A |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes, I'm human.
I also like to give people a chance so update my assessment from time to time.
"
Seems like a very fair appraisal to me... Like to think I'm the same. |
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Not really being judgmental as such if you decide you will not enjoy someone's company, because of their _iews...
People temper their post on these things anyways, cause they mostly want to be liked...
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes I do, not overtly bad but some comments off certain members when those Ched Evans threads were doing the rounds I kind of formed a few opinions of people from there.
Them there's others where I read something they've said and find myself nodding in agreement.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I judge every post by what is written. It doesn't mean I make solid conclusions based on that judgment about a person's personality. People can be very different in person |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't judge them on their forum posts.
Iv judged with private mails though and instinct. Always proven to be right.
I like to judge people at face value and once you have spoke/met.
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It's can be hard to portray yourself through the written word sometimes and you can come across as aggressive or a complete fool without being either of those things. I try not to judge as we all have our little quirks |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
Forum Mod |
Yes I do but making judgments based on whats shown to you isn't a bad thing
If ive made a judgment it doesn't mean its always a negative one and as time goes on that judgment may change  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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That's the difficulty with words - even with lots of smileys.
There is no tone of voice
No body language
No eye contact
Although at times the words used leave nothing to work out generally you can have an idea of the posters intention once you see their general way in the forum. |
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everyone judges all the time. Its the actions they take based on the judgments that can sometimes cause issues.
On the forums yo form ideas of people or at least the people they advertise themselves as. Personally i form opinions but i am happy to have those opinions altered by meeting or talking to them more personally. |
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I'm not sure I judge so to speak, but I do think you can tell quite a lot about how people behave, how they treat other people, how much self respect they have, how smart they are... you can generally get a feel for someone by what they write either on forums or in private messages.
It's human nature to make a call on how that comes over to you. How else do you decide on whether you want to go that step further and meet someone?
Maybe it is judging but there is a difference between using your judgement and being judgemental. Your instincts are rarely wrong.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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i'm constantly judging and forming opinions, i'm not rigid in these _iews. People adapt/learn/grow and develop and so my opinions of people may change with this as the individuals change
I will admit that first impressions do for the most part stick but i have had total changes of heart on people too.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes I do. And I'm not convinced by people who say different. There are a handful of forumites that I would love to meet because there personalities massively interest me. It stands to reason that there also some I would actively avoid.
That said it's a small number and In the main I'm indifferent and in the main i would only judge after meeting in person. I've been told more than once I'm not what people expect and my forum persona while true to who I am is only one part of me and I suspect that's true for many of us |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Judged you all as Deviant sexy perverts untill proven otherwise.
Some people do get judged as doofuses direct from the start though as they are that ignorant and abhorrent it's hard not to. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes I do. And I'm not convinced by people who say different. There are a handful of forumites that I would love to meet because there personalities massively interest me. It stands to reason that there also some I would actively avoid.
That said it's a small number and In the main I'm indifferent and in the main i would only judge after meeting in person. I've been told more than once I'm not what people expect and my forum persona while true to who I am is only one part of me and I suspect that's true for many of us"
Even those i dislike/clash with id still be polite too should we were in a room together.. Although with a written word i may come across as a complete tool (insert stronger word if necessary) in some circumstances, i dont believe it does not make me a nasty person, just opinionated. I think im perfectly pleasant and believe others can be also, we just have conflicting _iews but being an adult i'm sure most will have some kind of mutual ground. So id embrace the opportunity to meet some characters from here |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Many of us use the forums and chatrooms, everyone doesnt get on with everyone (no issues with that)
Do you judge people on forums posts and chatroom chats. Or are you a give everyone a chance.
I admit I have and been proved wrong before
"
I judged you and vice versus - it's nice to have an opinon shows some form of intelligence |
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Well I say differently...
I don't judge... Not at all on the superficial...
Making a considered decision about another is different...
"Judgement" is a work usually reserved to mean "snap judgement".
If we're playing the semantics game the yes we all judge. But out of the playground we all know what judgement really means...
It's your different.... Im going to bully and persecute the shit out of you till you conform... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Yes I do. And I'm not convinced by people who say different. There are a handful of forumites that I would love to meet because there personalities massively interest me. It stands to reason that there also some I would actively avoid.
That said it's a small number and In the main I'm indifferent and in the main i would only judge after meeting in person. I've been told more than once I'm not what people expect and my forum persona while true to who I am is only one part of me and I suspect that's true for many of us
Even those i dislike/clash with id still be polite too should we were in a room together.. Although with a written word i may come across as a complete tool (insert stronger word if necessary) in some circumstances, i dont believe it does not make me a nasty person, just opinionated. I think im perfectly pleasant and believe others can be also, we just have conflicting _iews but being an adult i'm sure most will have some kind of mutual ground. So id embrace the opportunity to meet some characters from here "
in person its easier to smile and be polite its what I do.  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Many of us use the forums and chatrooms, everyone doesnt get on with everyone (no issues with that)
Do you judge people on forums posts and chatroom chats. Or are you a give everyone a chance.
I admit I have and been proved wrong before
I judged you and vice versus - it's nice to have an opinon shows some form of intelligence "
tru |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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sometimes. But then sometimes I play Devils advocate also...
Ultimately it depends on whether I'm interested in the person or not. And if im not, then it goes straight over my heart  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I try not to judge people by what they write in forums but I occasionally do, it's hard to get a full picture of someone based purely on what they have written, I'm sure many people are very different to how I may think they are. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
in person its easier to smile and be polite its what I do. "
Same here, id much rather respect someone who will just be polite say things to my face or just stay out of the way than someone who makes jibes and speaks behind my back.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Well I say differently...
I don't judge... Not at all on the superficial...
Making a considered decision about another is different...
"Judgement" is a work usually reserved to mean "snap judgement".
If we're playing the semantics game the yes we all judge. But out of the playground we all know what judgement really means...
It's your different.... Im going to bully and persecute the shit out of you till you conform..."
 |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"
in person its easier to smile and be polite its what I do.
Same here, id much rather respect someone who will just be polite say things to my face or just stay out of the way than someone who makes jibes and speaks behind my back.
"
thats the issue I will say it to their faces but a big social isn't the place. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"That's the difficulty with words - even with lots of smileys.
There is no tone of voice
No body language
No eye contact
"
This.
I am bloody annoying in person. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think its a difficult thing not to do. The internet brings out the best and the worst in people, usually at the same time and the forums focus our opinions and usually oppose them against each other, its not a good mix! I try and give people the benefit of the doubt as I'd hope the same to be done in return. I wouldn't 'judge' a person until I've met them. That being said though sometimes peoples actions and words online are far too obvious |
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I have learned from mistakes elsewhere in the past, so don't rush to judge. With age I've also learned a lot from people who are very different from me, so tend to be drawn to people both alike and with alternative perspectives and personalities.
You can't also trust that what others say is truthful or not just written for impact.
I'm fairly sure that the people I like in the forums are fairly true to my expectations, but are likely much more interesting in person.
What we don't have here is anything other than one dimensional text, so we can't pick up the non verbal stuff that you would in the flesh - it's a limitation of all written short text in forums. |
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I get a gut instinct about someone on a first encounter, but I keep my cards close to my chest and never write someone off from the get go.
Some people can surprise you, in good and bad ways....
The way someone acts in public can be the total opposite of how they are behind closed doors...as this site shows  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I get a gut instinct about someone on a first encounter, but I keep my cards close to my chest and never write someone off from the get go.
Some people can surprise you, in good and bad ways....
The way someone acts in public can be the total opposite of how they are behind closed doors...as this site shows "
this |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes...I cant help but form impressions of people from their posts. There are a number of regular posters to the forum, some I secretly think are ace and quite a few I find hilarious, and there are others I cant help thinking what a douche. So yeah guess that constitutes judging  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Well I say differently...
I don't judge... Not at all on the superficial...
Making a considered decision about another is different...
"Judgement" is a work usually reserved to mean "snap judgement".
If we're playing the semantics game the yes we all judge. But out of the playground we all know what judgement really means...
It's your different.... Im going to bully and persecute the shit out of you till you conform..."
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Everyone judges. I don't see why people think it's a bad thing, unless of course it means they think their own opinion rules the world.
I judge each post. But I'm not stupid enough to think that one or a hundred posts gives a true picture of a poster. Everyone is cool in their own way. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Many of us use the forums and chatrooms, everyone doesnt get on with everyone (no issues with that)
Do you judge people on forums posts and chatroom chats. Or are you a give everyone a chance.
I admit I have and been proved wrong before
"
Id say anyone who says they have never judged is a liar. Its human nature |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Many of us use the forums and chatrooms, everyone doesnt get on with everyone (no issues with that)
Do you judge people on forums posts and chatroom chats. Or are you a give everyone a chance.
I admit I have and been proved wrong before
"
In my opinion you can only make up your mind about someone having met them face to face, not everyone can convey themselves online like they do in real life |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You shouldn't judge anyone because your own standards are always different to somebody else's."
totally agree we all have dif ideas oppions just cos we dont like something someone says does doesnt mean its wrong we just have dif tastes x
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"You shouldn't judge anyone because your own standards are always different to somebody else's."
everyone makes judgnents. I had to or I would have ended up in hospital recently longer
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Making judgements about situations and being judgemental about people are different things.
Most my judgements have been right lol"
Maybe he will surprise you. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Making judgements about situations and being judgemental about people are different things.
Most my judgements have been right lol
Maybe he will surprise you."
who? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Making judgements about situations and being judgemental about people are different things.
Most my judgements have been right lol
Maybe he will surprise you.
who?"
The person you are to stubborn to text |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Making judgements about situations and being judgemental about people are different things.
Most my judgements have been right lol
Maybe he will surprise you.
who?
The person you are to stubborn to text"
not got the persons number. Phone died  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Making judgements about situations and being judgemental about people are different things.
Most my judgements have been right lol
Maybe he will surprise you.
who?
The person you are to stubborn to text
not got the persons number. Phone died "
I bet he's still got your number, hope he gets in touch then . |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Making judgements about situations and being judgemental about people are different things.
Most my judgements have been right lol
Maybe he will surprise you.
who?
The person you are to stubborn to text
not got the persons number. Phone died
I bet he's still got your number, hope he gets in touch then ."
fuck knows lol.............. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Many of us use the forums and chatrooms, everyone doesnt get on with everyone (no issues with that)
Do you judge people on forums posts and chatroom chats. Or are you a give everyone a chance.
I admit I have and been proved wrong before
"
yes I do judge but I would change my mind in the right circumstances |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Many of us use the forums and chatrooms, everyone doesnt get on with everyone (no issues with that)
Do you judge people on forums posts and chatroom chats. Or are you a give everyone a chance.
I admit I have and been proved wrong before
yes I do judge but I would change my mind in the right circumstances "
Would they change your mind or you notice it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Everyone Judges.
Your mind has to first ACCEPT or REJECT that person before it can PROCESS that person and reach a decision, be it positive or negative.
It CANNOT do that without Judging.
You cannot control that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Everyone Judges.
Your mind has to first ACCEPT or REJECT that person before it can PROCESS that person and reach a decision, be it positive or negative.
It CANNOT do that without Judging.
You cannot control that."
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"Everyone Judges.
Your mind has to first ACCEPT or REJECT that person before it can PROCESS that person and reach a decision, be it positive or negative.
It CANNOT do that without Judging.
You cannot control that.
"
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"Do you judge people on forums posts and chatroom chats. Or are you a give everyone a chance.
"
I regularly find myself being judgemental, I think it is part of human nature, but I do consider it a fault and am a much harsher judge of myself.
On the positive side I regularly see posts from other people on here where they come across as extremely liberal, tolerant, friendly, inclusive and non-judgemental. Then there are the inspiring posts by people who have survived amazing hardships and are an inspiration to us all.
Whenever I see these posts, I like to judge, because it makes me feel positive about the human race.
Mr ddc |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
everyone judges......
be that from the person you see with the shortest skirt in a city centre on a saturday night.... to the person who wears a onesie going out of a supermarket/local offie,
anyway who doesn't is tell porkies...
but that can be different from being judgemental..... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I went to a social once and someone wouldn't talk to me based in something I posted in here
I tend not to judge based on forums posts unless its an extreme opinion as I have found most on here are totally different in real life |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Do you judge people on forums posts and chatroom chats. Or are you a give everyone a chance.
I regularly find myself being judgemental, I think it is part of human nature, but I do consider it a fault and am a much harsher judge of myself.
On the positive side I regularly see posts from other people on here where they come across as extremely liberal, tolerant, friendly, inclusive and non-judgemental. Then there are the inspiring posts by people who have survived amazing hardships and are an inspiration to us all.
Whenever I see these posts, I like to judge, because it makes me feel positive about the human race.
Mr ddc"
I'm a harsher critic of myself than I am of anyone else. I do judge, it only becomes a fault when it is being judgemental. I'm usually proved right though |
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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago
South West London / Surrey |
We all judge and make assumptions about people whether we want to admit it or not. It doesn't always have to be in a negative way.
Yes I do make assumptions about people from their posts. Sometimes I change my mind over time and others not.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think I'm guilty of this, there's some posters that pretty much always get a roll of the eyes from me. But if that's their opinions and make me feel that way then I think that may be a valid judgement. |
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I make judgments about people all of the time but I'm well rounded and self aware enough to understand my motivation behind such judgements. So some will be set in stone but most will flex and develop as I get to know someone.
Not all judgements you make about people are bad - I make judgements on people's positive attributes as well ad the negative.
Sometimes I'm a dick on here - sometimes I'm a dick in real life. It's the joy of being human 
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