I've just been told that people might not want to meet with us because we aren't a real couple, and this has got me thinking, why not? I know some may cite that it's not a stable relationship, for example.
We describe ourself as friends with benefits because that's what we are. To us, a fuck buddy is someone you give a booty call to, and then goes away again until the next time.
Mr is one of my closest friends - we talk a few times a day, we spend time together without having sex, we give each other birthday/Christmas presents, we can talk to each other about anything and are always there for each other. And the sex is fantastic.
Is it just that he's married that makes us appear less stable? What about those in the same position where both parties are single?
And are they less stable than those real couples who also play separately?
Interested on people's thoughts. Although I'd appreciate no comments about his marital status, this is a question about FBs/FWBs. Thanks. |
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"We will keep away from commenting about marital status, however how can you be a member of two couples?"
We're listed here as a couple, there's no FWB option. We're friends with benefits, that's how we describe ourselves |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It wouldn't be ideal for us as its the dynamic of playing with couples who are in a committed exclusive relationship that we look for. That way we are enjoying ourselves with people who are in the same situation as us, equal grounding so to speak if that makes sense ? We may consider fwb's depending on circumstances but would ideally like to meet with other married/long term couples. |
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"It wouldn't be ideal for us as its the dynamic of playing with couples who are in a committed exclusive relationship that we look for. That way we are enjoying ourselves with people who are in the same situation as us, equal grounding so to speak if that makes sense ? We may consider fwb's depending on circumstances but would ideally like to meet with other married/long term couples."
Yes that does, thank you  |
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By *eithoWoman
over a year ago
Chatham |
I meet couples but when I do mainly seek those who have their house in order. I would meet FWBs as long as it's all above board.
For example, I don't want texts trying to get a 121 meet with me behind the other partner's back, an issue that seems more prevalent in couples who lack robust commitment to each other.
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We met a fwb couple socially to get to know them. A day later we got a text from the guy asking us to meet him alone. This put us off straightaway. We became really close friends with the woman.
We won't meet guys or women who say they have a fb that could join us.
If the fb/fwb couple had a joint profile on here stating they only play together then we might meet them.
A big part of swinging for us is getting to know the people we meet in hope of developing a genuine friendship for future meets. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We will keep away from commenting about marital status, however how can you be a member of two couples?
We're listed here as a couple, there's no FWB option. We're friends with benefits, that's how we describe ourselves"
How you describe yourselves is your choice and if you are happy with that well that is cool.
We were merely replying to your comments about real couples and why others may not see you as a real couple.
Regards. |
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i personally dont see the harm in fwb's couperling up as a couple and playing as a couple to meet other couples
however my main concern is the many that do, but dont know the other partys preferences whilst meeting others.
As nothing worse than a couple that ruin a great meet all because they dont know the other person properly
I have no intention of speaking of the marital status some may like it some may not do.
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"We met a fwb couple socially to get to know them. A day later we got a text from the guy asking us to meet him alone. This put us off straightaway. We became really close friends with the woman.
We won't meet guys or women who say they have a fb that could join us.
If the fb/fwb couple had a joint profile on here stating they only play together then we might meet them.
A big part of swinging for us is getting to know the people we meet in hope of developing a genuine friendship for future meets."
That does seem to be an issue. We do state that we play separately as well as together, and we are both aware of all meets. We're both active on the profile, not just one of us.
Ideally we would like to meet a few couples that we can be friends with and have regular fun with. But it will take us some time to build up those friendships |
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Hi, for us the difficulty with fab couples who are fuck buddies and one (or both) have a partner of spouce in the background is the issue of reliability. We have made arrangements to meet such couples but then they have cancelled last minute because the attatched half of the couple hasnt been able to sneak off as expected. Its not a case of questioning peoples morals or commitment to each other, simply a case of wanting to ensure our limited playtime isn't wasted. |
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I had several dire experiences whereby the actual real married Partner appeared
On the first occasion I was actually hidden inside a wardrobe!
Second occasion I was slapped in the street and followed home by the wife
So for me it's a no go totally
I'm not up for humiliating myself |
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"We will keep away from commenting about marital status, however how can you be a member of two couples?
We're listed here as a couple, there's no FWB option. We're friends with benefits, that's how we describe ourselves
How you describe yourselves is your choice and if you are happy with that well that is cool.
We were merely replying to your comments about real couples and why others may not see you as a real couple.
Regards."
I wasn't trying to be rude, just trying to answer your question about being part of more than one couple. If there were a FWB option rather than couple when creating a profile, we would have selected that option. That's why the first line of our profile states we're FWB so that if anyone isn't interested they don't have to read further. |
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By *iewMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Angus & Findhorn |
I have read in the past the FWB couple are SOMETIMES perceived as one member ( usually male ) exploiting the other ( usually female ) to get meets, they see it easier if a female is on their arm
and that the female is hoping for more in the context of love/relationship and going along in the hope it deepens into that.
as I said, I have read that being said. There may or may not be any substance to that.
good luck, you strike me as a very honest poster on these forums  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Whilst some people won't see it as a problem, others will. We guess that is the way of the world.
We choose not to see fuck buddies. We like to have the sort of conversations with others that long term couples can share, not couples who just meet up for the benefits/fun bit. Some people are here just for sex, some to socialise with likeminded people. We have nothing against any type of buddies whatsoever, just not our thing.
We hope you understand our take on things. |
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"Hi, for us the difficulty with fab couples who are fuck buddies and one (or both) have a partner of spouce in the background is the issue of reliability. We have made arrangements to meet such couples but then they have cancelled last minute because the attatched half of the couple hasnt been able to sneak off as expected. Its not a case of questioning peoples morals or commitment to each other, simply a case of wanting to ensure our limited playtime isn't wasted."
I understand that completely. We also have the issue that if he gets a rare evening free we don't want to waste it, so when we get let down by others it's very disappointing. |
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"I have read in the past the FWB couple are SOMETIMES perceived as one member ( usually male ) exploiting the other ( usually female ) to get meets, they see it easier if a female is on their arm
and that the female is hoping for more in the context of love/relationship and going along in the hope it deepens into that.
as I said, I have read that being said. There may or may not be any substance to that.
good luck, you strike me as a very honest poster on these forums "
Thanks View.
I can see how that could happen. I'm very lucky in that Mr introduced me to all this (we joined the site together), with the caveat that anything I don't want to do, we don't. The only thing so far that we've both said no to is fisting, lol! |
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By *iewMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Angus & Findhorn |
"I have read in the past the FWB couple are SOMETIMES perceived as one member ( usually male ) exploiting the other ( usually female ) to get meets, they see it easier if a female is on their arm
and that the female is hoping for more in the context of love/relationship and going along in the hope it deepens into that.
as I said, I have read that being said. There may or may not be any substance to that.
good luck, you strike me as a very honest poster on these forums
Thanks View.
I can see how that could happen. I'm very lucky in that Mr introduced me to all this (we joined the site together), with the caveat that anything I don't want to do, we don't. The only thing so far that we've both said no to is fisting, lol! "
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"Whilst some people won't see it as a problem, others will. We guess that is the way of the world.
We choose not to see fuck buddies. We like to have the sort of conversations with others that long term couples can share, not couples who just meet up for the benefits/fun bit. Some people are here just for sex, some to socialise with likeminded people. We have nothing against any type of buddies whatsoever, just not our thing.
We hope you understand our take on things."
Absolutely, it's why I raised the question, to find out what people think. For you it's about having similar life experiences, I get that |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We will keep away from commenting about marital status, however how can you be a member of two couples?
We're listed here as a couple, there's no FWB option. We're friends with benefits, that's how we describe ourselves
How you describe yourselves is your choice and if you are happy with that well that is cool.
We were merely replying to your comments about real couples and why others may not see you as a real couple.
Regards.
I wasn't trying to be rude, just trying to answer your question about being part of more than one couple. If there were a FWB option rather than couple when creating a profile, we would have selected that option. That's why the first line of our profile states we're FWB so that if anyone isn't interested they don't have to read further. "
We didn't see you as being rude whatsoever, just asking questions and answering them in a reasonable way.
We hope you understand that we have no intentions of rudeness either.
Take care. |
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"We will keep away from commenting about marital status, however how can you be a member of two couples?
We're listed here as a couple, there's no FWB option. We're friends with benefits, that's how we describe ourselves
How you describe yourselves is your choice and if you are happy with that well that is cool.
We were merely replying to your comments about real couples and why others may not see you as a real couple.
Regards.
I wasn't trying to be rude, just trying to answer your question about being part of more than one couple. If there were a FWB option rather than couple when creating a profile, we would have selected that option. That's why the first line of our profile states we're FWB so that if anyone isn't interested they don't have to read further.
We didn't see you as being rude whatsoever, just asking questions and answering them in a reasonable way.
We hope you understand that we have no intentions of rudeness either.
Take care."
Absolutely, and thanks for your insight |
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