FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > why is age of the man a problem for most women?
why is age of the man a problem for most women?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Maybe they are looking at your profile. Many women look in stealth mode, stops the "you looked at my profile, want to fuck?" messages. "
exactly why I stay in stealth mode |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I doubt it's about your age and many women/couples _iew in stealth mode, You wouldn't know if they looked or not.
P.S. ALL single blokes struggle. I'm lucky to get one visible _iew per week. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Many women immediately reject an older man even without looking at his profile! "
They can't see your age to reject you for it without looking...you just can't see that they have...
But if they're uninterested in someone of your age then they're entitled to that opinion and choice |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Maybe they are looking at your profile. Many women look in stealth mode, stops the "you looked at my profile, want to fuck?" messages. "
I thought that worked  |
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"Many women immediately reject an older man even without looking at his profile! "
Because they can...if you're out of their age range don't be surprised! in fact...if you're out of their age range you may well be wasting your effort and their time by sending that message. |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"Many women immediately reject an older man even without looking at his profile! "
Not true, young man, not true at all!
I love older guys but it is not the age that attracts me primarily, it is their profile and confidence.
Don't give up! 
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Well for me i couldn't have an much older man as it would kind of be like shagging my dad. :-/ and young men do have young men bodies which are nice and firm.
I bet you would go for a young fit body over an older one? ! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Many women immediately reject an older man even without looking at his profile! "
Strangely enough many 18 - 25 year olds write
"Many women immediately reject an younger man even without looking at his profile! "
Bottom line is same advice as everyone else gets, quality of profile and pictures are at least as important as the quality of the first message. go on a wander of other men's profiles, check out the quality of those that have many verifications then go back and look at your own. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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sorry, you did ask, but for me just seeing your age would instantly have me know i wouldn't be attracted to you.
in fact most guys over 40 don't get a look in from me, i just don't find them attractive any more. used to when i was a teenager but more used to guys my own age or younger for the past 15 years now. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Many women immediately reject an older man even without looking at his profile! "
its not a problem some like older some dnt do you like Any women? If you got 300 messages a day would you be more choosy and delete those you had little interest in now you had more choice? blah  |
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"Many women immediately reject an older man even without looking at his profile! "
A lot of men send messages to women out side of there age preferences so I guess they should expect there message to be rejected
Age is just one of the things women on here reject men for, its called choice so don't take it personally
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Many women immediately reject an older man even without looking at his profile! "
regardless of your age OP, your profile isnt really that impressive.
there are other ways to meet women, why not try a social(as in the organised socials) or a club.
like anything on fab, if you find it a struggle.....try having some off site encounters..you may be surprised when people meet you in person. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Maybe they are looking at your profile. Many women look in stealth mode, stops the "you looked at my profile, want to fuck?" messages.
exactly why I stay in stealth mode"
Yeah, me too. |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"Many women immediately reject an older man even without looking at his profile!
regardless of your age OP, your profile isnt really that impressive.
there are other ways to meet women, why not try a social(as in the organised socials) or a club.
like anything on fab, if you find it a struggle.....try having some off site encounters..you may be surprised when people meet you in person."
Well said |
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I am young at heart and to be honest I'm not very inclined to meet guys older than my husband, who is 54. They remind me of my dad and in some cases smell like him. Men also seem to slip into advanced middle age earlier than I do. Sorry over 55s. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What is this stealth mode that is spoken of????"
Hide yourself when perving others profiles and pictures, you won't show on who looked at their profile |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You've got 25 as your minimum age range but do you seriously think a 25 year old woman wants to meet a 66 year old man?
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some do..but theyre usually fakes lol |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
"Many women immediately reject an older man even without looking at his profile! "
You're very close to the age of my dad, so yes, I'd see your age and not read your profile.
It's up to me who I meet and I don't have to explain or justify my preferences.
There are a few 50-somethings I will/would meet but 60+ is just not my thing.
Yes, it's about the connection but it's also about physical attraction. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldnt want someone the same age as my dad or potentially having a heart attack on me! Lol"
Lol. I'm outta this thread before i say what else i wanted to say.
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I think age is the ops issue potentially if he never gets direct feedback.
Target people who have your age in their age preference statement, otherwise you're going to waste your time.
If you know you're out of their interest range then they probably wont check your profile out.
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I can understand the reasoning for
some comments on this thread.
Though as a lot of young guys prefer older ladies I do feel the younger ladies are missing out here.
Many times if witnessed older fellas putting younger ones to shame with performance.
Noticing that the younger ladies thoroughly enjoying the experience too...
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Because it's their preference to meet men whatever age they choose. Joining,or indeed becoming a site ssupporter doesn't guarantee that women will come rushing, waving their knickers in the air as they run. It's nothing to do with your skills, much more to do with attraction, I just don't find many older men sexually attractive. Nor would I play with someone old enough to be my parent or young enough to be my child. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm personally very opened minded when it comes to the age of potential meets.
The only reason I have a capped age range is because the majority of the men ive met over 50 (not on my verifications I hasten to add) have struggled to keep up or their age has caused fluctuating erections which isn't exactly the most flattering thing to happen mid meet.
Must admit though, I doubt Id meet anyone over 60 except socially |
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"I'm personally very opened minded when it comes to the age of potential meets.
The only reason I have a capped age range is because the majority of the men ive met over 50 (not on my verifications I hasten to add) have struggled to keep up or their age has caused fluctuating erections which isn't exactly the most flattering thing to happen mid meet.
Must admit though, I doubt Id meet anyone over 60 except socially"
Even if your virility hasn't diminished with age, that is a common perception of the older man. If you are a woman seeking quality sex and can choose between a 40 year old and a 60 year old, it's a no brainier.  |
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By *igeiaWoman
over a year ago
Bristol |
I wouldn't say it's a problem for women OP. You may be missing out on some hot 76 year old but they're not bemoaning your age preferences so why should it be one set of criteria for you (who is only looking to meet someone up to 9 years older than you) and another for everyone else? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Maybe they are looking at your profile. Many women look in stealth mode, stops the "you looked at my profile, want to fuck?" messages. "
Surely that doesn't happen :p |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Because older men on this site are pissy. They send you whingy messages when you say no because they perceive it as being because of their age. Then I point out to then I have a 63 year old play partner. Then they get pissy and entitled saying that if I see him then I should meet them too... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldn't say it's a problem for women OP. You may be missing out on some hot 76 year old but they're not bemoaning your age preferences so why should it be one set of criteria for you (who is only looking to meet someone up to 9 years older than you) and another for everyone else?"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't mean to sound mean but I have met a few older men and they are more likely to have erection problems, they need more to get them going, maybe why they often prefer much younger women.
they have trouble using condoms, they grumble and say things like, when I was young and good looking.... I also think they are more likely to rely on a womans looks to boost their morale, make them feel young again. |
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By *issmorganWoman
over a year ago
Calderdale innit |
"I'm always in stealth mode! And sorry yes age does come into it, I'm not looking to fuck someone who is ages with my dad, I like men my own age (ish) "
This for me ,i wouldn't go loads younger either.We are all allowed our own preferences. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Many women immediately reject an older man even without looking at his profile! "
To be honest it dose work both ways younger men often get less of a chance and men do the same with women but its not as important to us i dont think |
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"I don't mean to sound mean but I have met a few older men and they are more likely to have erection problems, they need more to get them going, maybe why they often prefer much younger women.
they have trouble using condoms, they grumble and say things like, when I was young and good looking.... I also think they are more likely to rely on a womans looks to boost their morale, make them feel young again."
cor I think the maturer gent is getting a raw deal here.
Might be simply that they are more relaxed and wish to share and savour the experience.
They have,nt got excess testosterone bubbling over messing with there head .
Older gents wish a more leisurely time not a quick wam bam.... nor do they feel unerpressure to perform like a porn stud.
I mean if we were disscuss maturer( beautifull) ladies in the same vein most would be dissmayed..... |
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Also if one is purely using an erect penis as a guys sole indicator for attraction your mistaken.
Plenty of naughty hot fun can still be had with a flacid penis...
I often are really attracted to women with a thumping heart and raised pulse...... but doesn,t alway result in a erection...... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Well for me i couldn't have an much older man as it would kind of be like shagging my dad. :-/ and young men do have young men bodies which are nice and firm.
I bet you would go for a young fit body over an older one? ! "
as if youth would be the only thing that is attractive.
you have no idea how many young guys would want to meet a woman of my age. body is not everything. for me and fortunately for some other people sex appeal more than a "firm body".
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"Well for me i couldn't have an much older man as it would kind of be like shagging my dad. :-/ and young men do have young men bodies which are nice and firm.
I bet you would go for a young fit body over an older one? !
as if youth would be the only thing that is attractive.
you have no idea how many young guys would want to meet a woman of my age. body is not everything. for me and fortunately for some other people sex appeal more than a "firm body".
"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think people see a age range they like and that's it .. When 100s are mailing its just the easy thing to do here."
no good if its 100s of messages from men you don't realy fancy though is it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think people see a age range they like and that's it .. When 100s are mailing its just the easy thing to do here.
no good if its 100s of messages from men you don't realy fancy though is it."
yes that's why we have filters in place so we can sort out age . |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"Many women immediately reject an older man even without looking at his profile!
Strangely enough many 18 - 25 year olds write
Many women immediately reject an younger man even without looking at his profile!
Bottom line is same advice as everyone else gets, quality of profile and pictures are at least as important as the quality of the first message. go on a wander of other men's profiles, check out the quality of those that have many verifications then go back and look at your own."
bingo!!!!!
half the problem is that people like to blame the thing that leaves them blameless.... for example, age....
"those nasty people don't like meeting us old/young people..... oh woe is me"
the old half of the problem is that to be honest people don't help themselves "help themselves"..... rest on your laurels.... 3 lines is enough... let the people flow!!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think people see a age range they like and that's it .. When 100s are mailing its just the easy thing to do here.
no good if its 100s of messages from men you don't realy fancy though is it. yes that's why we have filters in place so we can sort out age ."
I have got my filters in place, they don't have filters for everything though do they. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think people see a age range they like and that's it .. When 100s are mailing its just the easy thing to do here.
no good if its 100s of messages from men you don't realy fancy though is it. yes that's why we have filters in place so we can sort out age .
I have got my filters in place, they don't have filters for everything though do they."
Well I was getting 100s of letters a week a day . So turning them up has sorted that out I can cope now .  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thanks for all the comments many not wanting older men but quite a few positive. Didn't know about ' stealth' _iewing that explains a lot! Does that apply to messages as well? "
You can read messages and then mark them as unread.
I do it so that I remember who I need to reply to. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Many women immediately reject an older man even without looking at his profile! "
Because like it or not age is an important criteria to some people and they will make their choices based that.
Remember although you may feel your as fit and look as good as you did 20 or 30 years ago you have to accept your not, some women dont want to fuck guys old enough to be their dad , facial skin becomes loose man boobs develope muscle becomes less defined all of this makes us older guys less attractive, and complaining on the forums is unlikely to improve your chances as you come across as a Victor Meldrew another reason not to meet |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
"Also if one is purely using an erect penis as a guys sole indicator for attraction your mistaken.
Plenty of naughty hot fun can still be had with a flacid penis...
I often are really attracted to women with a thumping heart and raised pulse...... but doesn,t alway result in a erection......"
Yes, fun can be had if he can't get hard but probably more fun for him than for me. If I meet someone for sex, I want penetrative sex. It's why I'm not interested in soft swing.
And rightly or wrongly, if a man can't get hard when meeting me, it's going to make me feel like crap and damage my self-confidence. |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
"I think age is the ops issue potentially if he never gets direct feedback.
Target people who have your age in their age preference statement, otherwise you're going to waste your time.
If you know you're out of their interest range then they probably wont check your profile out.
"
I suspect this is part of the issue the OP is having, and it is his problem, not a problem with the women.
If you try it on with someone who has already stated they won't be interested, you should expect them to say no or to ignore you.
Why bother to look at the profile of someone you know isn't what you want and didn't respect your preferences?
I sometimes get messages that say, basically, "it's a shame I am too old for you" from men well outside my upper age preference.
They read my profile and then decided to ignore my preferences, (no, I don't filter on age. There's a reason for it. But I think I'm going to have to start).
In my more patient moments I just delete the message and block them. However, I sometimes want to reply, "yes, it's a shame. For you".
Besides, in my experience, 50- and 60- somethings often look a lot older than they claim to be. Either they've had hard lives or some are inclined to knock a few - sometimes quite a few years - off. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I doubt it's about your age and many women/couples _iew in stealth mode, You wouldn't know if they looked or not.
P.S. ALL single blokes struggle. I'm lucky to get one visible _iew per week."
i look |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Many a fine tune played on an old fiddle.
Problem is a fiddle is a beautiful instrument to look at. Where an old man is not going to be seen as aesthetic to younger people.
It's not all bad news as I'm sure some will meet older guys as above.
Young bucks and Adonis's apply within for this couple must have own teeth and hair!!!  |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
I am just wondering about something... and age preferences are, of course, an individual's choice, just like body sizes, height, hair colour etc...but "older men" does not necessarily mean that they don't have their own hair/ teeth etc. Talking of teeth - I DO have an issue with missing or bad teeth and poor oral hygiene which is not limited to a particular age group.
I have experienced a really fabulous encounter with a very fit (physique, stamina and attitude!) guy who would was in his late sixties or maybe even early seventies.
I would not single anybody out based on age so my settings are quite broad.
I guess horses and stuff...
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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OP you are 66 and yet your age range that YOU are looking for is 25 to 75 - so you yourself are only looking for up to 9 years older but a whopping 41 years younger??
It's no different for a lot of women  |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"I think age is the ops issue potentially if he never gets direct feedback.
Target people who have your age in their age preference statement, otherwise you're going to waste your time.
If you know you're out of their interest range then they probably wont check your profile out.
I suspect this is part of the issue the OP is having, and it is his problem, not a problem with the women.
If you try it on with someone who has already stated they won't be interested, you should expect them to say no or to ignore you.
Why bother to look at the profile of someone you know isn't what you want and didn't respect your preferences?
I sometimes get messages that say, basically, "it's a shame I am too old for you" from men well outside my upper age preference.
They read my profile and then decided to ignore my preferences, (no, I don't filter on age. There's a reason for it. But I think I'm going to have to start).
In my more patient moments I just delete the message and block them. However, I sometimes want to reply, "yes, it's a shame. For you".
Besides, in my experience, 50- and 60- somethings often look a lot older than they claim to be. Either they've had hard lives or some are inclined to knock a few - sometimes quite a few years - off."
Twelve years in one case! When I questioned that his reply was that he "put down the age he feels".
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"I wouldnt want someone the same age as my dad or potentially having a heart attack on me! Lol"
Depends on the fitness of the guy…
I don't think I'll want to meet girls as young as my daughters when they get to be 18+ though. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Also if one is purely using an erect penis as a guys sole indicator for attraction your mistaken.
Plenty of naughty hot fun can still be had with a flacid penis...
I often are really attracted to women with a thumping heart and raised pulse...... but doesn,t alway result in a erection......"
Granted...but I like the possibility of an erect penis to be on the table... |
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Licketysplits lady. I always respect the age limit parameters its where the lady leaves it 'up to 99 years ' that causes the problem. She may be the same age as me or a year or two younger and seems to be looking for the same things but still no reply! Probably then a profile thing and she must have taken time to look (stealthily) why not a courteous 'no thanks'. Doesn't take a mo! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Licketysplits lady. I always respect the age limit parameters its where the lady leaves it 'up to 99 years ' that causes the problem. She may be the same age as me or a year or two younger and seems to be looking for the same things but still no reply! Probably then a profile thing and she must have taken time to look (stealthily) why not a courteous 'no thanks'. Doesn't take a mo!"
I think that changes the whole picture.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Licketysplits lady. I always respect the age limit parameters its where the lady leaves it 'up to 99 years ' that causes the problem. She may be the same age as me or a year or two younger and seems to be looking for the same things but still no reply! Probably then a profile thing and she must have taken time to look (stealthily) why not a courteous 'no thanks'. Doesn't take a mo!"
No reply is a no thanks. Check the faq |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Someone who is 66 is older than my grandparents, I'm sure they are lovely people but I personally have never found anyone at that age that I am attracted to. It's all personal preference surely |
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"Someone who is 66 is older than my grandparents, I'm sure they are lovely people but I personally have never found anyone at that age that I am attracted to. It's all personal preference surely "
Yes! However some people find it difficult to accept that women who like recreational sex have preferences, there is an understanding (incorrect) that they will have sex with anyone. This is not aimed at anyone in particular by the way.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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the women of his age tend to be onhere looking for younger guys than themselves
you start seeing a common theme when you use the forums long enough. the guys that post these no reply/luck threads are either fat, in really good shape, really old or really young lol
so if you fall into either extreme of the above categories you may find yourself struggling on fab |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"the women of his age tend to be onhere looking for younger guys than themselves
you start seeing a common theme when you use the forums long enough. the guys that post these no reply/luck threads are either fat, in really good shape, really old or really young lol
so if you fall into either extreme of the above categories you may find yourself struggling on fab "
YEs that's true, by the way I am training my shoulders tomorrow lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"the women of his age tend to be onhere looking for younger guys than themselves
you start seeing a common theme when you use the forums long enough. the guys that post these no reply/luck threads are either fat, in really good shape, really old or really young lol
so if you fall into either extreme of the above categories you may find yourself struggling on fab YEs that's true, by the way I am training my shoulders tomorrow lol "
lol samehere mate big shoulders sesh tomoz |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"the women of his age tend to be onhere looking for younger guys than themselves
you start seeing a common theme when you use the forums long enough. the guys that post these no reply/luck threads are either fat, in really good shape, really old or really young lol
so if you fall into either extreme of the above categories you may find yourself struggling on fab YEs that's true, by the way I am training my shoulders tomorrow lol
lol samehere mate big shoulders sesh tomoz"
YEs that's it pal, its all about getting monster sized shoulders |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Because of the huge man to woman ratio so age is just another thing to filter them out with."
Even if there weren't lots of younger men on here ,I still wouldn't have sex with a man older than me I wasn't attracted to. I would leave |
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Missing teeth poor oral hygeine..
I had one upper tooth knocked out by a DIY accident, well cracked in half had to have removed.
Was going to the expence of a implant.
But to be honest I think it adds charactor in strange way and left it.
Actually suprisingly had a few positive comments.
Odd that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Because of the huge man to woman ratio so age is just another thing to filter them out with.
Even if there weren't lots of younger men on here ,I still wouldn't have sex with a man older than me I wasn't attracted to. I would leave "
Did I not tell you im actually 76yrs old |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
"Because of the huge man to woman ratio so age is just another thing to filter them out with.
Even if there weren't lots of younger men on here ,I still wouldn't have sex with a man older than me I wasn't attracted to. I would leave "
Same here. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Because of the huge man to woman ratio so age is just another thing to filter them out with.
Even if there weren't lots of younger men on here ,I still wouldn't have sex with a man older than me I wasn't attracted to. I would leave "
I wouldn't have sex with a younger man I wasn't attracted to neither. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Because of the huge man to woman ratio so age is just another thing to filter them out with.
Even if there weren't lots of younger men on here ,I still wouldn't have sex with a man older than me I wasn't attracted to. I would leave
Did I not tell you im actually 76yrs old "
Lol If 76 year olds looked and fucked like you I'd change my age range immediately |
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"i blame peter stringfellow. many guys must have dreamed of being him when they got old... "
Peter is an old friend of many years I will explain your concern to him...............I know he will laugh his socks off. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Because of the huge man to woman ratio so age is just another thing to filter them out with.
Even if there weren't lots of younger men on here ,I still wouldn't have sex with a man older than me I wasn't attracted to. I would leave
Did I not tell you im actually 76yrs old
Lol If 76 year olds looked and fucked like you I'd change my age range immediately "
Click click |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Because of the huge man to woman ratio so age is just another thing to filter them out with.
Even if there weren't lots of younger men on here ,I still wouldn't have sex with a man older than me I wasn't attracted to. I would leave
I wouldn't have sex with a younger man I wasn't attracted to neither. "
Me neither but I tend to find I'm attracted to a lot of men who are younger than me and very,very few who are older. It's not just the physical aspect either,it's their outlook on life and how life hasn't marred them yet |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I thought about that whole thing here. and my answer is that age is not important.
I feel attracted to someone or I don't.
I would go to bed with robert redford or sean connery and they are much older than me.
simple as that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Because of the huge man to woman ratio so age is just another thing to filter them out with.
Even if there weren't lots of younger men on here ,I still wouldn't have sex with a man older than me I wasn't attracted to. I would leave
I wouldn't have sex with a younger man I wasn't attracted to neither.
Me neither but I tend to find I'm attracted to a lot of men who are younger than me and very,very few who are older. It's not just the physical aspect either,it's their outlook on life and how life hasn't marred them yet"
I see.
that's your preference. nothing wrong with that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"i blame peter stringfellow. many guys must have dreamed of being him when they got old...
Peter is an old friend of many years I will explain your concern to him...............I know he will laugh his socks off. "
No problem. Am sure he gave a lot of guys unrealistic aspirations. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Maybe they are looking at your profile. Many women look in stealth mode, stops the "you looked at my profile, want to fuck?" messages.
exactly why I stay in stealth mode"
Aha.....but I know you have looked at my profile Jaqs......as I have at yours lol! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Maybe they are looking at your profile. Many women look in stealth mode, stops the "you looked at my profile, want to fuck?" messages.
exactly why I stay in stealth mode"
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By *HaRiFMan
over a year ago
Beyond the shadows. |
"I wouldnt want someone the same age as my dad or potentially having a heart attack on me! Lol
This  "
well at least you'd have given him a happy ending. I thought that's what all women dream off |
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I'm in a relationship with someone of 72, because were just made for each other.
But on here its just sex so set my age at 50 as just for sex I'm not naturally attracted to older men.
But keep at it my bf still has meets |
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