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Winks :- Love them or Hate them ?
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By *harkyUK69 OP Man
over a year ago
march, cambs. |
Personally i'm a winker, for me its a way to initiate contact, if i wink at you it's because i like what i read, i don't like to be pushy !
I see it as a way to invite you to have a look at me ! If you wink back i spend the time to compose a individual message, tailored to your profile ( and including whatever words you have asked for to verify that i have actual read your profile) I never copy paste a personal message, unless its directions, or safety info.
So why do so many people seem to hate winks ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Some people see it as lazy, why wink when a message is much nicer. If your interested enough to wink then surely one can introduce yourself by message.
That said, personally.........we're not bothered if we get them, it's flattering and one never knows where it could lead. |
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By *harkyUK69 OP Man
over a year ago
march, cambs. |
I do think it's much easier for Females and Couples, you tend to get approached ?
Males have to do more work, and thatsnot a bad thing, though i do struggle to come up with new approaches for each message, and i don't want any messages i send to sound like they are cut and paste, when all is said and done, there are only so many ways to introduce yourself and initiate dialog. I try to stand out by making my messages different and interesting, if i was doing 50 a day like some guys on here then there is no way i could put the quality into them that those recieving them deserve !
I suppose because i am not desperate i can afford the luxury of the slow game, it may be age, it may be experience, but i have found good things cum to those who have patience  |
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By *hortieWoman
over a year ago
Northampton |
Winks are alright!!
Its not like someones tryna shove their knob (or their strap-on) through your letterbox ... I don't get why people get annoyed when they get one! (a wink - not a knob through their letterbox)  |
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By *om DawnCouple
over a year ago
Medway |
We've tried both options and winking works for us. As we say it's not meant to be lazy just a way of saying we are interested are you? It doesn't matter if you produce a Shakespearian effort of a message, as soon as the female of the couple takes a look at you and says 'nah' it's game over ! Stick with the winking |
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Love them!
I have put effort into my profile, a wink is a way to attract attention. If someone winks at after reading my profile there is a good chance we have enough in common that a meet will be good. If I wink at someone and then they contact me the same is true.
Saves a lot of time exchanging mails only to find that there is no compatibility.
Of course for them to work you have to be honest in your profile and that seems to be a foreign concept to many. |
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We don't mind a wink, it will make us look at your profile and respond if you appeal. On the other hand, a message will always get a response.
Personally I think that a wink is no more lazy than a message which just says "Hi" or "Nice Pix"  and these types of messages are often in receipt of a short reply too.... unless we think you're sexy |
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Yep, we use winks as well. It's the equivalent of catching someone's eye across the room and giving them a smile, it says we like what we see. A wink back means they think the same, so then we'll send a message.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Personally i'm a winker, for me its a way to initiate contact, if i wink at you it's because i like what i read, i don't like to be pushy !
I see it as a way to invite you to have a look at me ! If you wink back i spend the time to compose a individual message, tailored to your profile ( and including whatever words you have asked for to verify that i have actual read your profile) I never copy paste a personal message, unless its directions, or safety info.
So why do so many people seem to hate winks ?"
I don't mind them in a forum game "wink someone in this thread" otherwise find people use them because they are lazy. |
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"I don't mind them in a forum game "wink someone in this thread" otherwise find people use them because they are lazy. "
I'm not lazy, and I'm sure many other people here aren't. However, some people are nervous or shy. A message that consists of "hi" is lazy. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't mind them in a forum game "wink someone in this thread" otherwise find people use them because they are lazy.
I'm not lazy, and I'm sure many other people here aren't. However, some people are nervous or shy. A message that consists of "hi" is lazy. "
It's just my opinion  I'm sure your not lazy but, a lot are. I agree that is a lazy message. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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What's wrong with Winking..???
I see them as the equivalent of smiling at a stranger - maybe you get a smile back and start talking, or else there is no response and you are free to pass on by...
I feel quite sorry for people who are too cold or shallow to see the worth of them....
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm a winker if I like a profile I will wink
I find first messages awkward as some fems couple will open message give a scan and move on as they will have other messages,
It's just like smiling at someone |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What's wrong with Winking..???
I see them as the equivalent of smiling at a stranger - maybe you get a smile back and start talking, or else there is no response and you are free to pass on by...
I feel quite sorry for people who are too cold or shallow to see the worth of them....
"
Wink |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't know how anyone could hate them....that said I largely ignore them, it never really occurs to me to check. "
I've winked you a few times in the past Anna  |
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By *odareyouMan
over a year ago
not far from iceland,,,,,, tescos is nearer though :-) (near leeds) |
I don't send winks as a way of contacting someone, if the person(s) profile interests me enough I think the few minutes it takes to type a message is a good investment of my time.
Having said that I don't mind receiving them which if I do I respond with a message. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It started with a wink"
Most, if not all our contacts have started with a wink. We look at all profiles of people who wink us, and if we like we wink back!
Sometimes we recieve a message from someone who, after checking their profile, are not our "cup of tea" but we won't ignore the message, so we have to reply and tell them that we are not really interested which can be incredibly uncomfortable for us and a little hurtful for them. A wink takes all that awkwardness out of the situation.
Oh, and winking is NOT lazy!! Judging people like that from such an insignificant act on a website forum is not a very smal minded and incredibly shallow!!  |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
I am going to be "mr grumpy" in the thread...
all a wink shows me is that you managed to find the wink button.... nothing more...
it doesn't show me any personality as to why i should be interested in a person... it doesn't show me if you even looked at the profile and just the pics......
i use to call it lazy... but it isn't even that, its minimal effort for maximum reward.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I am going to be "mr grumpy" in the thread...
all a wink shows me is that you managed to find the wink button.... nothing more...
it doesn't show me any personality as to why i should be interested in a person... it doesn't show me if you even looked at the profile and just the pics......
i use to call it lazy... but it isn't even that, its minimal effort for maximum reward...."
And that comment was pathetic as it works both ways! How do you know that the person who has winked you hasn't read your profile description as well as looked at your pictures?? As for not showing you any personality, not even a profile can show you someone's true personality as they can type anything they like to try and make themselves sound interesting!
I'm sorry if this is a little harsh but I like to wink people and by stating what you have in your comment above means your calling us "less than lazy!" which we most certainly are not and we find insulting! |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"
And that comment was pathetic as it works both ways! How do you know that the person who has winked you hasn't read your profile description as well as looked at your pictures?? As for not showing you any personality, not even a profile can show you someone's true personality as they can type anything they like to try and make themselves sound interesting!
I'm sorry if this is a little harsh but I like to wink people and by stating what you have in your comment above means your calling us "less than lazy!" which we most certainly are not and we find insulting! "
thanks... but where did i say it was "less than lazy"!.... I said I use to call it lazy! now i think it is minimal effort for maximum effort....
if it shows you have read the profile and you are interested... then write back to the profile and give them a reason as to why they would want to meet you...
show them you are individual,
show them "wow i have to meet these people"
wow them with so much pazazz they have to get back to you....
I know how i'll do that.... I'll just push a button!!!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
And that comment was pathetic as it works both ways! How do you know that the person who has winked you hasn't read your profile description as well as looked at your pictures?? As for not showing you any personality, not even a profile can show you someone's true personality as they can type anything they like to try and make themselves sound interesting!
I'm sorry if this is a little harsh but I like to wink people and by stating what you have in your comment above means your calling us "less than lazy!" which we most certainly are not and we find insulting!
thanks... but where did i say it was "less than lazy"!.... I said I use to call it lazy! now i think it is minimal effort for maximum effort....
if it shows you have read the profile and you are interested... then write back to the profile and give them a reason as to why they would want to meet you...
show them you are individual,
show them "wow i have to meet these people"
wow them with so much pazazz they have to get back to you....
I know how i'll do that.... I'll just push a button!!!!!"
"Wow'ing" them is part of the process and, in our opinion, doesn't need to be done in the very first instance of contact!!
When at a bar, before approaching a girl you like do you "check her out" first and try to catch her eye maybe? Or do you go storming in like a "bull in a china shop!?" Showering her with compliments in the hope she won't turn around and tell you to "bog off!"
A wink is not "minimal effort" but it is a good ice breaker and the start of a process! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I like winks...if I like the look of someone I usually wink first followed by a message soon after, its an ice breaker.
If I get a wink I feel flattered that someone is taking an interest. |
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"
And that comment was pathetic as it works both ways! How do you know that the person who has winked you hasn't read your profile description as well as looked at your pictures?? As for not showing you any personality, not even a profile can show you someone's true personality as they can type anything they like to try and make themselves sound interesting!
I'm sorry if this is a little harsh but I like to wink people and by stating what you have in your comment above means your calling us "less than lazy!" which we most certainly are not and we find insulting!
thanks... but where did i say it was "less than lazy"!.... I said I use to call it lazy! now i think it is minimal effort for maximum effort....
if it shows you have read the profile and you are interested... then write back to the profile and give them a reason as to why they would want to meet you...
show them you are individual,
show them "wow i have to meet these people"
wow them with so much pazazz they have to get back to you....
I know how i'll do that.... I'll just push a button!!!!!
"Wow'ing" them is part of the process and, in our opinion, doesn't need to be done in the very first instance of contact!!
When at a bar, before approaching a girl you like do you "check her out" first and try to catch her eye maybe? Or do you go storming in like a "bull in a china shop!?" Showering her with compliments in the hope she won't turn around and tell you to "bog off!"
A wink is not "minimal effort" but it is a good ice breaker and the start of a process! "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
And that comment was pathetic as it works both ways! How do you know that the person who has winked you hasn't read your profile description as well as looked at your pictures?? As for not showing you any personality, not even a profile can show you someone's true personality as they can type anything they like to try and make themselves sound interesting!
I'm sorry if this is a little harsh but I like to wink people and by stating what you have in your comment above means your calling us "less than lazy!" which we most certainly are not and we find insulting!
thanks... but where did i say it was "less than lazy"!.... I said I use to call it lazy! now i think it is minimal effort for maximum effort....
if it shows you have read the profile and you are interested... then write back to the profile and give them a reason as to why they would want to meet you...
show them you are individual,
show them "wow i have to meet these people"
wow them with so much pazazz they have to get back to you....
I know how i'll do that.... I'll just push a button!!!!!
"Wow'ing" them is part of the process and, in our opinion, doesn't need to be done in the very first instance of contact!!
When at a bar, before approaching a girl you like do you "check her out" first and try to catch her eye maybe? Or do you go storming in like a "bull in a china shop!?" Showering her with compliments in the hope she won't turn around and tell you to "bog off!"
A wink is not "minimal effort" but it is a good ice breaker and the start of a process!
"
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