That I want to spend my birthday weekend with my friends rather than having lunch with my dad?
He made plans to have lunch with me today, but my sister is working now so after I'd already made plans for next weekend, he changes the lunch plans to next Sunday?
I told him I'd be home around 4 on the Sunday, and asked if we could do dinner instead, and now my step mum is pissy with me for wanting to move plans like 4 hours...!
Turns out all plans for food with my dad are now off the table, and he's gonna drop my presents off in the week.
It feels like they're having a strop because I refuse to change MY birthday plans to fit around them...
Am I in the wrong? Am I just being selfish? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Then why do I feel like a cunt for it? "
Because that's what parents do! Its your birthday, the reason they're being like that is probably because they have something they want to do around then |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"That I want to spend my birthday weekend with my friends rather than having lunch with my dad?
He made plans to have lunch with me today, but my sister is working now so after I'd already made plans for next weekend, he changes the lunch plans to next Sunday?
I told him I'd be home around 4 on the Sunday, and asked if we could do dinner instead, and now my step mum is pissy with me for wanting to move plans like 4 hours...!
Turns out all plans for food with my dad are now off the table, and he's gonna drop my presents off in the week.
It feels like they're having a strop because I refuse to change MY birthday plans to fit around them...
Am I in the wrong? Am I just being selfish? "
.Sorry
Selfish  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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youre not wrong....but family can make you feel more guilty,more quickly than anyone else! they'll get over it..because they love you! have a lovely birthday! |
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By *ina75Woman
over a year ago
Stone |
Because your step mum is using emotional blackmail.
Remind her that if it had been the other way round and you had prior plans with them and your friends changed the arrangements You would say the same thing to your mates as the first plan should take priority.
Switch the emotional blackmail back on them and suggest that you feel this way because that's what your family taught you To do. |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
My birthday is just that - mine. I'll try and accommodate all plans but I get to do what I want to do on my birthday, and everyone else can just take a back seat for a while. There are plenty of days between now and then so things can be rearranged, and if they won't do that then its not your fault.
If your father prefers not to be flexible then say thank you for the presents, give him a kiss, and move on.
I have no time for drama, family or not. |
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"Because your step mum is using emotional blackmail.
Remind her that if it had been the other way round and you had prior plans with them and your friends changed the arrangements You would say the same thing to your mates as the first plan should take priority.
Switch the emotional blackmail back on them and suggest that you feel this way because that's what your family taught you To do. "
My step mum is an evil bitch. When I got married she told me it had to be on a Tuesday. Then when I booked it all for a Tuesday she started screaming at me and saying she works on Tuesday's. My dad took her side until I showed him the text she sent me saying Tuesday.
So you're right about the emotional blackmail. Especially as I gave them almost 2 weeks notice, I spoke to my dad about it last Tuesday! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"That I want to spend my birthday weekend with my friends rather than having lunch with my dad?
Feeling that might be a human thing to do.
No making time for a parent on a day that means something to them is selfish.
"
.
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you let someone other than you and your spouse decide when you got married?
Sounds like youe ave let them walk all over you and now you are trying to (quite rightly) stand up for yourself they are not liking it. Stand by your decision and your original plans. If i have read it right then they are the ones moving the goal posts, not you. There may be short term aoin but in the long run you will be a better person for it.
No one can make you feel a cunt unless you give them permission too (i may have paraphrased that saying somewhat haha) |
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"you let someone other than you and your spouse decide when you got married?
Sounds like youe ave let them walk all over you and now you are trying to (quite rightly) stand up for yourself they are not liking it. Stand by your decision and your original plans. If i have read it right then they are the ones moving the goal posts, not you. There may be short term aoin but in the long run you will be a better person for it.
No one can make you feel a cunt unless you give them permission too (i may have paraphrased that saying somewhat haha)"
I've spent my entire life trying to make other people happy before myself. Maybe 21 years is where I need to draw the line.
Thank you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't know, but he was the one who changed the date in the first place.
then again you are lucky to have a dad like that because mine never wanted to spend time with me on my birthdays. |
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"I don't know, but he was the one who changed the date in the first place.
then again you are lucky to have a dad like that because mine never wanted to spend time with me on my birthdays. "
Sorry to hear that |
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