FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > STALKER

STALKER

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I used to date this girl about nine months ago, and although it was great, she just kind of drifted away. I asked her recently why, and she said she 'hit a brick wall' and confessed to being a 'mental fuck-up'. I accepted this and moved on.

Although I discovered this week that she is now working in the same street where I live. Now don't jump to conclusions, but I stood outside her work today waiting for her to finish just so I could pretend to conveniently walk past and exchange witticisms with her and flirt outrageously. I stood by and watched her lock up as she then sprinted across the road to quickly jump on the bus that had just stopped opposite her workplace. My chance had gone.

My question however is, am I crazy stalker? Or am I just 'crazy in love'?

PS: I am normal.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Jesus.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

The more appropriate word might be predator?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Jesus. "

No, it was a woman.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"The more appropriate word might be predator?

Or a drone.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman over a year ago

little house on the praire

Doing it once I wouldn't call you a stalker but if it was repeated I'd say at least weird behaviour.

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple over a year ago

in Lancashire

OP, why?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"OP, why?"

Because I never stopped fancying her.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman over a year ago

little house on the praire

Its the way you say don't jump to conclusions but

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Yes you have the early signs of being a stalker

She ran away from you ....

Maybe you should get night vision goggles to wear in the bushes outside her house then she wont run away because she wont be able to see you

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It jut seems a bit sad to loiter just to speak to her. Why not just call her. Or text her. Or speak to her. Why do you need to act all weird and pretend to bump in to her. It's a bit creepy

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Take a good look at yourself mate!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"OP, why?

Because I never stopped fancying her."

If that was a suitable reason, i'd have to life my life in a number of bus stations/travel interchanges, not to mention numerous bus stops in between. Or shops. Or beaches.

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By *iewMan over a year ago
Forum Mod

Angus & Findhorn

wait until 14/02 & after work sing to her the Adele song about lost love....

if she doesn't run screaming for the bus, there may be hope...

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"It jut seems a bit sad to loiter just to speak to her. Why not just call her. Or text her. Or speak to her. Why do you need to act all weird and pretend to bump in to her. It's a bit creepy"

Because I am a creepy guy

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"OP, why?

Because I never stopped fancying her."

Soooo, she tells you she's slightly unstable, and all you can think is, I'll dupe her into a "chance meeting" because I really want to give her one??

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

My top tip ( with a nod to Jim):

Fuck her mother, she'll soon see the error of her ways and come running.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman over a year ago

little house on the praire

I'm also glad I'm not potentially a woman you would like to meet of here after reading that

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple over a year ago

in Lancashire

"It jut seems a bit sad to loiter just to speak to her. Why not just call her. Or text her. Or speak to her. Why do you need to act all weird and pretend to bump in to her. It's a bit creepy"

this..

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

PS: I am normal."

Why didn't you just straight up go and said whatever..Hi or something....whatever..?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

PS: I am normal.

Why didn't you just straight up go and said whatever..Hi or something....whatever..?"

She sprinted, remember?

Wondering if she saw OP?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

PS: I am normal.

Why didn't you just straight up go and said whatever..Hi or something....whatever..?

She sprinted, remember?

Wondering if she saw OP?"

She definitely didn't see me. She sprinted because she saw the bus and didn't want to miss it.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

PS: I am normal.

Why didn't you just straight up go and said whatever..Hi or something....whatever..?

She sprinted, remember?

Wondering if she saw OP?"

Yeah but he's says he used to date her. ..that's what I don't get.

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By *iss_Samantha_LovecockTV/TS over a year ago

bmth /poole sometimes blandford

well u obviously still want/need /like her ...why not tell her your feelings ..if she tells you to fuck off then time to find another hobby .if u continues after that then u need to have a word with yourself

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

I asked her about a month ago if she would ever consider seeing me again for a no-strings drink, she said yes (availability and money permitting). She also said 'never say never' regarding the future.

Bottom line is, she knows how I feel, she knows I'm keen, and we still keep in contact. It's just a case of taking it slow and not overstepping the mark maybe.

I don't know, I'm a lovesick puppy

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By *iewMan over a year ago
Forum Mod

Angus & Findhorn

"I asked her about a month ago if she would ever consider seeing me again for a no-strings drink, she said yes (availability and money permitting). She also said 'never say never' regarding the future.

Bottom line is, she knows how I feel, she knows I'm keen, and we still keep in contact. It's just a case of taking it slow and not overstepping the mark maybe.

I don't know, I'm a lovesick puppy

she also knows where you are, if she is interested she will be in touch

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman over a year ago

little house on the praire

Bottom line is, she knows how I feel, she knows I'm keen, and we still keep in contact. It's just a case of taking it slow and not overstepping the mark maybe.

I don't know, I'm a lovesick puppy

"
well if your still in contact why do you have to be creepy about it most people would send a text asking for a drink or something

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple over a year ago

in Lancashire

Bottom line is, she knows how I feel, she knows I'm keen, and we still keep in contact. It's just a case of taking it slow and not overstepping the mark maybe.

I don't know, I'm a lovesick puppy

she also knows where you are, if she is interested she will be in touch"

this..

if she is keen she will be in touch and if your still waiting after a month its either that she has forgotten, is too busy or is not interested..

maybe text her or something..?

certainly less weird than your behaviour and you will know either way..

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Bottom line is, she knows how I feel, she knows I'm keen, and we still keep in contact. It's just a case of taking it slow and not overstepping the mark maybe.

I don't know, I'm a lovesick puppy

well if your still in contact why do you have to be creepy about it most people would send a text asking for a drink or something"

Done that before, but she was always too busy (she only just recently moved house) and stressed with financial problems, so I don't wanna tread on her toes.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Bottom line is, she knows how I feel, she knows I'm keen, and we still keep in contact. It's just a case of taking it slow and not overstepping the mark maybe.

I don't know, I'm a lovesick puppy

Does she know your been a fab member over a year ???

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By *B9 QueenWoman over a year ago

Over the rainbow, under the bridge

"OP, why?

Because I never stopped fancying her."

That's ok then.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Maybe respect that then?

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By *abioMan over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

PS: I am normal."

thats what you think... but I wouldn't call your opening post "normal" behaviour....

I am betting if you had been on the other end of the behaviour you are talking about.... I don't think you would be looking at it the same way

p.s i don't think many people you are trying to attract as going to be impressed by that behaviour either....

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

PS: I am normal.

thats what you think... but I wouldn't call your opening post "normal" behaviour....

I am betting if you had been on the other end of the behaviour you are talking about.... I don't think you would be looking at it the same way

p.s i don't think many people you are trying to attract as going to be impressed by that behaviour either...."

You make it sound so predatory. I only waited for her to finish work so I could talk to her. Yes it's weird, yes it's odd, but I wasn't planning on sexually assaulting her. Although I was wearing black gloves and a long overcoat, that probably didn't help.

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By *bi HaiveMan over a year ago
Forum Mod

Cheeseville, Somerset

PS: I am normal.

Why didn't you just straight up go and said whatever..Hi or something....whatever..?

She sprinted, remember?

Wondering if she saw OP?

She definitely didn't see me. She sprinted because she saw the bus and didn't want to miss it."

Have you thought about becoming a bus driver?

You could then ask for her route and see her every day! Plus it would look like a random chance encounter!

Much easier than loitering outside her workplace!

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

I would have said there was nothing wrong with what you did from your first post...I am guessing there must be many people about who have "planned" to be in the same place as an ex while hoping to bump into them........but then you carried on and said you are in contact and she keeps making excuses not to meet up for a drink.

She sounds like she is sending you a message to me

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By *erbyDalesCplCouple over a year ago

Derbyshire

" she then sprinted across the road to quickly jump on the bus that had just stopped opposite her workplace. My chance had gone.

My question however is, am I crazy stalker? Or am I just 'crazy in love'?

PS: I am normal."

There's your answer right there.

Tomorrow, get on the bus at the stop before, with a load of your friends, so the only free seat is next to you, and pay the bus driver to say "No standing"

Don't forget to act all nonchalant like

You're welcome

Mr ddc

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By *erbyDalesCplCouple over a year ago

Derbyshire

Have you thought about becoming a bus driver?

You could then ask for her route and see her every day! Plus it would look like a random chance encounter!

Much easier than loitering outside her workplace!

Ooh, you beat me to it!

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By *qua vitaeWoman over a year ago

Shropshire/Midlands

PS: I am normal.

thats what you think... but I wouldn't call your opening post "normal" behaviour....

I am betting if you had been on the other end of the behaviour you are talking about.... I don't think you would be looking at it the same way

p.s i don't think many people you are trying to attract as going to be impressed by that behaviour either....

Umm...you may not have planned on sexually assaulting her, but how is she to know that??

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Have you not considered starting a profile on her behalf, messaging each other at frequent interevals with a growing need and lust for each other and then printing her side off and shoving it through her works letterbox, adding a handwritten noteto the effect of "do you remember all of this, is it not time to act on it?"

Better get a mate to do the handwriting just in case she's on holiday that week.

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By *icketysplitsWoman over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

I was reading an article about stalking today.

OP, your type of stalking is the good old-fashioned sort. The modern stalker does it with a glass of wine in one hand the handheld device in the other.

The 2012 Cyberpsychology, Behaviour and Social Networking study found that stalking an ex on Facebook is linked with "greater current distress over the breakup, more negative feelings, more sexual desire, more longing for the ex-partner and lower personal growth." Experts say that Facebook can prolong post-breakup pain, while delaying emotional recovery.

So, is she on your Facebook? If you you may not be a love lorn puppy after all.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I was reading an article about stalking today.

OP, your type of stalking is the good old-fashioned sort. The modern stalker does it with a glass of wine in one hand the handheld device in the other.

So, is she on your Facebook? If you you may not be a love lorn puppy after all.

We are indeed Facebook friends, but she rarely posts and I rarely stalk (on Facebook, that is).

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By *ophieslutTV/TS over a year ago

Central

She told the op that she drifted away, and that should mean that he leaves her alone.

Did he expect to pick up any blocks from this post?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I used to date this girl about nine months ago, and although it was great, she just kind of drifted away. I asked her recently why, and she said she 'hit a brick wall' and confessed to being a 'mental fuck-up'. I accepted this and moved on.

My question however is, am I crazy stalker? Or am I just 'crazy in love'?

PS: I am normal."

Nah if you was really a stalker or weird you wouldnt even be asking this question, the very fact you have asked means your well balanced but just did a spur of the moment stupid thing and deep down you know you was wrong

Don't do it again

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By *ust MonicaWoman over a year ago

CAMBRIDGESHIRE

"wait until 14/02 & after work sing to her the Adele song about lost love....

if she doesn't run screaming for the bus, there may be hope..."

this (I'm a romantic, got to keep believing lol)

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

My question however is, am I crazy stalker? Or am I just 'crazy in love'?

PS: I am normal.

Don't do it again

Awfully sorry, I apologise profusely.

#SorryNotSorry

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

This is how I read what you write.
"...and although it was great, she just kind of drifted away. I asked her recently why, and she said she 'hit a brick wall' and confessed to being a 'mental fuck-up'. I accepted this and moved on"

"...she knows how I feel, she knows I'm keen, and we still keep in contact. It's just a case of taking it slow and not overstepping the mark maybe.

... she was always too busy (she only just recently moved house) and stressed with financial problems..."

"She also said 'never say never' regarding the future."

"We are indeed Facebook friends, but she rarely posts ..."

AW, you have to let her go, she is not interested in you.

Hugs!

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By *isexmistressWoman over a year ago

Prestwich

You just gotta admire a guy who `outs` himself to the world as being a weird un

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"....and although it was great, she just kind of drifted away. I asked her recently why, and she said she 'hit a brick wall' and confessed to being a 'mental fuck-up'. I accepted this and moved on..."

Sounds like you may not have moved on.

"she knows how I feel, she knows I'm keen, and we still keep in contact."

Not moving on...

" It's just a case of taking it slow and not overstepping the mark maybe."

Still holding on...

"... she was always too busy (she only just recently moved house) and stressed with financial problems..."

Moved on perhaps?

"She also said 'never say never' regarding the future.

Now either she is keeping you dangling as a back up plan, or she is trying not to hurt your feelings. If she wanted to sustain a relationship with you, you would still be in one. "Its not you, its me" springs to mind.

Steer clear as you run the risk of reading too much into it. You'll convince yourself you have seen signs that aren't there and you will cross the line.

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By *o new WinksMan over a year ago

BSE

She works there so she has a lunchtime?

Go in...say you saw her and wondered if she fancied a coffee at lunch. Just 'friends'.

Its the sort of adult thing that ladies love.

If she says no then draw a line and move on.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

OP. Your 'look at me' post has gone horribly wrong! Now there's a whole bunch of ladies on here who'll run a mile if you message them. Way to piss on your chips fella!

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"She works there so she has a lunchtime?

Go in...say you saw her and wondered if she fancied a coffee at lunch. Just 'friends'.

Its the sort of adult thing that ladies love.

If she says no then draw a line and move on. "

She works for a coffee store, the last thing she'll want is a coffee

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"OP. Your 'look at me' post has gone horribly wrong! Now there's a whole bunch of ladies on here who'll run a mile if you message them. Way to piss on your chips fella! "

You seriously think this is a 'look at me' post? Women can say what they want about me, it's my post I care about.

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By *issHottieBottieWoman over a year ago

Kent

Sounds to me like she's giving you the brush off in the nicest way possible.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"OP, why?

Because I never stopped fancying her.

Soooo, she tells you she's slightly unstable, and all you can think is, I'll dupe her into a "chance meeting" because I really want to give her one??"

this - and you have succeeded in possibly freaking out someone who has had the bottle to tell you she has mental health problems - try being her friend not a shadow that appears out of the blue -

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

To me it's the kind of scenario I would have adopted around the ages 19-21, which was pre mobile phone & social media (yes I am that old!).....a well planned 'chance meeting' to casually bump into an ex just to see if our eyes would meet across a crowded street etc etc etc....

I have to say back then it did work but that was because there was no other way to contact me as he'd lost my landline number and we were ex-directory

Nowadays I believe if someone doesn't want to contact you there generally is a reason for it.......

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By *olly RogererMan over a year ago

Braintree

Just turn up with flowers ya dumpling! Easy peasy instead of some elaborate bull shit chance meeting. Dont think your a stalker at all but do think you have the lurve bug

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It's reads to me like you are stalking her, and perhaps you feel by telling everybody on here about your strange behaviour it will somehow show you in a better light.

Your on fabswingers to find females for sex and I suspect your following this girl for the same reason.

Forget her and move on.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

My question however is, am I crazy stalker? Or am I just 'crazy in love'?

PS: I am normal."

I knew a man that lived in a shared house. He fell in love with one of his housemates, followed her around, bought her presents. She wasn't interested. Told him to get lost. Rebuked all his advances, pushed him down a short flight of stairs...

They ended up married, had four kids - I'm the youngest of the four.

Sometimes - 'stalking' pays off.

It's just knowing when to draw the line

S x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

PS: I am normal.

thats what you think... but I wouldn't call your opening post "normal" behaviour....

I am betting if you had been on the other end of the behaviour you are talking about.... I don't think you would be looking at it the same way

p.s i don't think many people you are trying to attract as going to be impressed by that behaviour either....

Ditch the creepy look and she might have said hello :p

clearly you have feelings for her but how does she feel about you?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"It's reads to me like you are stalking her, and perhaps you feel by telling everybody on here about your strange behaviour it will somehow show you in a better light.

Your on fabswingers to find females for sex and I suspect your following this girl for the same reason.

Forget her and move on."

Sex is not my primary interest with her.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

PS: I am normal.

thats what you think... but I wouldn't call your opening post "normal" behaviour....

I am betting if you had been on the other end of the behaviour you are talking about.... I don't think you would be looking at it the same way

p.s i don't think many people you are trying to attract as going to be impressed by that behaviour either....

Ditch the creepy look and she might have said hello :p

clearly you have feelings for her but how does she feel about you?"

Don't really know, to be honest. She's not one for opening up. I practically gave her a 'get out of jail free' card a few weeks ago by saying "Look, if you genuinely aren't interested in me and you wanna cut off all contact, just tell me now and I can have that closure then", so I left the door wide open for her, but she still insisted everything was fine.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I don't think you're an ax murderer or anything but OP..why the bejesus you started this thread is beyond me.

Fab is extremely judgemental at best. (Tongue firmly in cheek)

/delete this thread.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I don't think you're an ax murderer or anything but OP..why the bejesus you started this thread is beyond me.

Fab is extremely judgemental at best. (Tongue firmly in cheek)

/delete this thread.

I'm just too gosh-darn honest, I guess. I have no qualms about people thinking I'm a creep or a weirdo, because I am

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"It's reads to me like you are stalking her, and perhaps you feel by telling everybody on here about your strange behaviour it will somehow show you in a better light.

Your on fabswingers to find females for sex and I suspect your following this girl for the same reason.

Forget her and move on.

Sex is not my primary interest with her."

Your digging yourself ever deeper, your on a sex site looking for sex with females don't beat about the bush ( no pun intended) primary or secondary your looking for sex!

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"It's reads to me like you are stalking her, and perhaps you feel by telling everybody on here about your strange behaviour it will somehow show you in a better light.

Your on fabswingers to find females for sex and I suspect your following this girl for the same reason.

Forget her and move on.

Sex is not my primary interest with her.

Your digging yourself ever deeper, your on a sex site looking for sex with females don't beat about the bush ( no pun intended) primary or secondary your looking for sex!

Seriously, I do not think of sex when I think of her. I did initially when we first started dating, but it's different now. I don't know what you're trying to imply.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I'm ever so surprised by some of the responses in here!! I know I've only been here 3 months & people can judge harshly at times but goodness me!

My opinion in what you did? I'd have done the same (covers head) but I also would have been a bit worried about how it looked. I think you feel she's confused & if it was a seemingly random meet there'd be no pressure and she'd realise she likes you enough to date you again.

I'd like to say I wouldn't do it just once more, but....!

Does she know you live there, or have you moved recently? x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I don't think you're an ax murderer or anything but OP..why the bejesus you started this thread is beyond me.

Fab is extremely judgemental at best. (Tongue firmly in cheek)

/delete this thread.

I'm just too gosh-darn honest, I guess. I have no qualms about people thinking I'm a creep or a weirdo, because I am

well that is some admission - people might steer clear

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By *icketysplitsWoman over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"I'm ever so surprised by some of the responses in here!! I know I've only been here 3 months & people can judge harshly at times but goodness me!

I'd like to say I wouldn't do it just once more, but....!

Does she know you live there, or have you moved recently? x"

These things have a way of coming out. When it does it goes one of two ways: she walks away from what looks like creepy manipulative behaviour or she has fallen in love and decides it's sweet (until things go wrong and s\he falls out of love).

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By *iewMan over a year ago
Forum Mod

Angus & Findhorn

"I'm ever so surprised by some of the responses in here!! "

it's the web

after 7 years I am still surprised

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I personally wouldn't do that no matter how I felt, but it's your feelings. Though perhaps you're not considering hers? If she was interested enough she'd be happy to meet you etc.

Does she know you swing / look to meet others?

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By *erbyDalesCplCouple over a year ago

Derbyshire

Seriously, I do not think of sex when I think of her. I did initially when we first started dating, but it's different now.."

OMG you haven't told her that have you? While I'm pretty sure women don't like being thought of as sex-objects, they equally get a tad disappointed to be told "Actually, you don't turn me on at all"

(In truth I know nothing about women)

Mr ddc

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'm ever so surprised by some of the responses in here!! I know I've only been here 3 months & people can judge harshly at times but goodness me!

I'd like to say I wouldn't do it just once more, but....!

Does she know you live there, or have you moved recently? x

Yes I definitely agree it could go both ways, at least he'd know either way. x

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I'm ever so surprised by some of the responses in here!! I know I've only been here 3 months & people can judge harshly at times but goodness me!

I'd like to say I wouldn't do it just once more, but....!

Does she know you live there, or have you moved recently? x"

She does know where I live, she came to my house when we dated last year. The thing I want to make clear to everybody here is that I'm not stupid, I know she doesn't see me the same way any more, I just wanna get back in touch with her again for my own selfish reasons. I enjoy her company and I like looking at her face, that's it.

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By *icketysplitsWoman over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"I'm ever so surprised by some of the responses in here!! I know I've only been here 3 months & people can judge harshly at times but goodness me!

I'd like to say I wouldn't do it just once more, but....!

Does she know you live there, or have you moved recently? x

Yes I definitely agree it could go both ways, at least he'd know either way. x

He does know, he just doesn't want to believe and accept she's not interested enough to reciprocate his feelings. For whatever reason she hasn't gone to the stage of telling him to cease and desist all communication but she may have reasons for not doing so, including worrying what sort of behaviour that might draw from him.

OP, I'm not saying you are dangerous or that she may fear you - I am using it as an example of why she may be leaving things very casual, based on personal experience.

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By *icketysplitsWoman over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"I'm ever so surprised by some of the responses in here!! I know I've only been here 3 months & people can judge harshly at times but goodness me!

I'd like to say I wouldn't do it just once more, but....!

Does she know you live there, or have you moved recently? x

And she has her own selfish reasons for not being in touch. Why are your reasons so paramount that you disregard hers? THAT is stalker thinking.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I'm ever so surprised by some of the responses in here!! I know I've only been here 3 months & people can judge harshly at times but goodness me!

I'd like to say I wouldn't do it just once more, but....!

Does she know you live there, or have you moved recently? x

Yes I definitely agree it could go both ways, at least he'd know either way. x

OP, I'm not saying you are dangerous or that she may fear you - I am using it as an example of why she may be leaving things very casual, based on personal experience."

As mentioned in my previous comment, I am fully aware nothing will happen with her, I just want to see her for my own selfish reasons. I'm happy to keep my distance, be a friend and just admire from afar.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"It jut seems a bit sad to loiter just to speak to her. Why not just call her. Or text her. Or speak to her. Why do you need to act all weird and pretend to bump in to her. It's a bit creepy"

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I'm ever so surprised by some of the responses in here!! I know I've only been here 3 months & people can judge harshly at times but goodness me!

I'd like to say I wouldn't do it just once more, but....!

Does she know you live there, or have you moved recently? x

And she has her own selfish reasons for not being in touch. Why are your reasons so paramount that you disregard hers? THAT is stalker thinking.

How am I disregarding her? She's happily going about her life doing whatever she wants to do. I'm not interfering or getting in the way of that. When we do speak, it's sporadically at best and when I saw her yesterday it was the first time in nine months.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"It jut seems a bit sad to loiter just to speak to her. Why not just call her. Or text her. Or speak to her. Why do you need to act all weird and pretend to bump in to her. It's a bit creepy

Because he's afraid of all-out rejection

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"It jut seems a bit sad to loiter just to speak to her. Why not just call her. Or text her. Or speak to her. Why do you need to act all weird and pretend to bump in to her. It's a bit creepy

Because he's afraid of all-out rejection"

I know I'll be rejected if the issue is forced, that's why I'm happy with the way things are now. Just friends.

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By *icketysplitsWoman over a year ago

Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound

"I'm ever so surprised by some of the responses in here!! I know I've only been here 3 months & people can judge harshly at times but goodness me!

I'd like to say I wouldn't do it just once more, but....!

Does she know you live there, or have you moved recently? x

And she has her own selfish reasons for not being in touch. Why are your reasons so paramount that you disregard hers? THAT is stalker thinking.

Have a think about what you have just written, couple it with hanging around her place of work and then consider what you would say to a friend doing this or if it was a woman doing this to you.

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple over a year ago

in Lancashire

Have a think about what you have just written, couple it with hanging around her place of work and then consider what you would say to a friend doing this or if it was a woman doing this to you.

This..

however given the OP's liking for drama the whole thing could equally be a jolly jape by him..

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

PS: I am normal.

thats what you think... but I wouldn't call your opening post "normal" behaviour....

I am betting if you had been on the other end of the behaviour you are talking about.... I don't think you would be looking at it the same way

p.s i don't think many people you are trying to attract as going to be impressed by that behaviour either....

Ditch the creepy look and she might have said hello :p

clearly you have feelings for her but how does she feel about you?

If that's the case then why don't you just message her and ask her straight up. Because I've have this problem now :/

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'm ever so surprised by some of the responses in here!! I know I've only been here 3 months & people can judge harshly at times but goodness me!

I'd like to say I wouldn't do it just once more, but....!

Does she know you live there, or have you moved recently? x

Yes I definitely agree it could go both ways, at least he'd know either way. x

OP, I'm not saying you are dangerous or that she may fear you - I am using it as an example of why she may be leaving things very casual, based on personal experience.

I hope she takes up with you again hun, cos I think this post on here has seriously affected your chance of meets off here now.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I'm ever so surprised by some of the responses in here!! I know I've only been here 3 months & people can judge harshly at times but goodness me!

I'd like to say I wouldn't do it just once more, but....!

Does she know you live there, or have you moved recently? x

Yes I definitely agree it could go both ways, at least he'd know either way. x

OP, I'm not saying you are dangerous or that she may fear you - I am using it as an example of why she may be leaving things very casual, based on personal experience.

I hope she takes up with you again hun, cos I think this post on here has seriously affected your chance of meets off here now."

Pfft, I am who I am. Not desperate for meets and there are some here who sympathise with my plight anyway.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

one word you say that jumped off the page and that is '' selfish''

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"one word you say that jumped off the page and that is '' selfish''"

Aye, go on then, highlight the negatives, that's all forum-users do anyway

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Bottom line is, she knows how I feel, she knows I'm keen, and we still keep in contact. It's just a case of taking it slow and not overstepping the mark maybe.

I don't know, I'm a lovesick puppy

Then it is time for a new tactic, she knows the score, so forget her and move on with your life. your closeness is preventing her from missing you and deciding she wants you, so go find someone else while you are doing that she may decide to get in touch, even if she doesn't you will maybe find someone else. Win Win situation.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Look why don't you just phone her and ask her for a drink , stop being weird you know the woman .

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Look why don't you just phone her and ask her for a drink , stop being weird you know the woman ."

I think I mentioned earlier I have already done that.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Bottom line is, she knows how I feel, she knows I'm keen, and we still keep in contact. It's just a case of taking it slow and not overstepping the mark maybe.

I don't know, I'm a lovesick puppy

Great advice mate, occupy yourself with someone else until she comes knocking, then let the other one go, or keep both?

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Bottom line is, she knows how I feel, she knows I'm keen, and we still keep in contact. It's just a case of taking it slow and not overstepping the mark maybe.

I don't know, I'm a lovesick puppy

Great advice mate, occupy yourself with someone else until she comes knocking, then let the other one go, or keep both?

That's pretty much why I'm on Fab, mate. Although any encounters I have from here on in will most likely not be with forum-users

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"one word you say that jumped off the page and that is '' selfish''

Aye, go on then, highlight the negatives, that's all forum-users do anyway

well we only go off what we read - if you bother to read the stuff i write its mostly buoyant and positive -

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"one word you say that jumped off the page and that is '' selfish''

Aye, go on then, highlight the negatives, that's all forum-users do anyway

well we only go off what we read - if you bother to read the stuff i write its mostly buoyant and positive - "

Then if that's your outlook, read everything I said and don't take the word 'selfish' out of context.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Bottom line is, she knows how I feel, she knows I'm keen, and we still keep in contact. It's just a case of taking it slow and not overstepping the mark maybe.

I don't know, I'm a lovesick puppy

Does she know your been a fab member over a year ??? "

What does it matter if he's been on fab? They aren't together.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Look why don't you just phone her and ask her for a drink , stop being weird you know the woman .

I think I mentioned earlier I have already done that."
I don't always read other posts just first one at times ... Just if you know her there is no needs for you to be like a stranger if she is not up for a drink and a chat maybe just give up on her and move on .. as you cant make people like you . x

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

All I know if I liked a person I would wish to be around him and could just be a nice cup of coffee a chat that don't cost a lot .

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 29/01/15 13:28:47]

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"one word you say that jumped off the page and that is '' selfish''

Aye, go on then, highlight the negatives, that's all forum-users do anyway

well we only go off what we read - if you bother to read the stuff i write its mostly buoyant and positive -

Then if that's your outlook, read everything I said and don't take the word 'selfish' out of context."

i have and commented previously on what you said before - you went on to say you were selfish - i simply said that one word jumped off the page to me - and it speaks volumes -

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

We all got urges, go on and fuck her lol.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"We all got urges, go on and fuck her lol."

he needs her consent - and he's not even talking to her at the no, so might be a bit awkward shags, not to mention I l l e g a l

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"We all got urges, go on and fuck her lol."
She has to feel that way too ... And I think its a lets be friends thing really .

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"We all got urges, go on and fuck her lol.

he needs her consent - and he's not even talking to her at the no, so might be a bit awkward shags, not to mention I l l e g a l

"
YEs I gues it is, if they have a chat after work she might change her mind.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"We all got urges, go on and fuck her lol. She has to feel that way too ... And I think its a lets be friends thing really ."
Yes that's right and best as being friends as she moved on too.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Crazy in love

Uh oh Uh oh lol x

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By *afadaoMan over a year ago

Staines

Be afraid. Be very afraid.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"one word you say that jumped off the page and that is '' selfish''

Aye, go on then, highlight the negatives, that's all forum-users do anyway

Why ask for opinions if you don't like the answer?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I know women can be confusing but really, if she wanted to be with you, she'd be with you. If she wanted to be friends with you, she'd act like your friend. If she wanted your company, she'd try to spend time with you.

If she doesn't do those things and you persist in trying to make it happen I'm not sure it's stalker behaviour but it feels a wee bit pathetic, and time to move on.

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"one word you say that jumped off the page and that is '' selfish''

Aye, go on then, highlight the negatives, that's all forum-users do anyway

Why ask for opinions if you don't like the answer? "

Because it's an opinion based on one word from an entire write-up which was ignored.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"one word you say that jumped off the page and that is '' selfish''

Aye, go on then, highlight the negatives, that's all forum-users do anyway

Why ask for opinions if you don't like the answer?

Because it's an opinion based on one word from an entire write-up which was ignored."

maybe the summary of the write up is selfish, and that word sums it up.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

" I know she doesn't see me the same way any more, I just wanna get back in touch with her again for my own selfish reasons. I enjoy her company and I like looking at her face, that's it."

read it all - still comes across as selfish - you wrote the word - i picked it out but in the context of the whole sentence - ok i could have said that the phrase - '' i just wanna get back in touch with her again for my own selfish reasons'' says it all - but its word selfish that gives the tilt to the whole thing

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Can everyone let this drop now.

OP has been plenty and thoroughly fucking castigated.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I've not read this thread just the title ... Nobody deserves a stalker, it's a terrible thing to live with!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Can everyone let this drop now.

OP has been plenty and thoroughly fucking castigated.

Where? He asked a question and as it's a forum he got replys he may not like some of the comments but that's the joy of a open forum

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Can everyone let this drop now.

OP has been plenty and thoroughly fucking castigated.

It doesn't really work like that...

And some sensible points have been made (e.g. by moi) it's just a shame they've been ignored in favour of picking a fight with some others.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Can everyone let this drop now.

OP has been plenty and thoroughly fucking castigated.

Where? He asked a question and as it's a forum he got replys he may not like some of the comments but that's the joy of a open forum "

Personally..I would have just straight up chatted..texted..whatever.

Having said that...

...some of the replies here imply that OP should be hanging from his fucking neck.

It's not my kind of approach but then I'm also not the OP to be fair.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Can everyone let this drop now.

OP has been plenty and thoroughly fucking castigated.

Where? He asked a question and as it's a forum he got replys he may not like some of the comments but that's the joy of a open forum "

exactly - my frst reply was for him to be a friend to someone who had mental health problems - he went on about how weird and creepy he was - and if someone has a pop at me i will pop right back - not often but if i feel justified i will do

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Can everyone let this drop now.

OP has been plenty and thoroughly fucking castigated.

Where? He asked a question and as it's a forum he got replys he may not like some of the comments but that's the joy of a open forum

She doesn't officially have mental health problems, she meant that she's fucked up in the head when it comes to commitment and relationships, etc. This has been blown way out of proportion.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Can everyone let this drop now.

OP has been plenty and thoroughly fucking castigated.

Where? He asked a question and as it's a forum he got replys he may not like some of the comments but that's the joy of a open forum

She doesn't officially have mental health problems, she meant that she's fucked up in the head when it comes to commitment and relationships, etc. This has been blown way out of proportion."

maybe a more accurate post in the first place - or clarification as people commented might have altered the angle of chat then

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"Can everyone let this drop now.

OP has been plenty and thoroughly fucking castigated.

Where? He asked a question and as it's a forum he got replys he may not like some of the comments but that's the joy of a open forum

She doesn't officially have mental health problems, she meant that she's fucked up in the head when it comes to commitment and relationships, etc. This has been blown way out of proportion.

maybe a more accurate post in the first place - or clarification as people commented might have altered the angle of chat then "

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