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If Historical Events had Facebook Statuses

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By *layfullsam OP Man over a year ago

Solihull

Make up a Facebook statuse from a famous person or historic event through history

God dam apple fell out of a tree and hit me on the head

Isaac Newton

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Who told all them injuns there was free whiskey?

Gl Custer

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple over a year ago

in Lancashire

that's not a real gun he's holding is it..?

John Lenn

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By *hampagne and aleCouple over a year ago

great yarmouth

Don't what all the panic is about this ships unsinkable

Captain of the titanic

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Those apples just look sooo tasty...

Adam and Eve

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Sick of everyone moaning about the price of bread. Just eat cake!

Marie Antoinette

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By *nnyMan over a year ago

Glasgow

Ah'll find ye yet ya wee boson!

Peter Higgs.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I fucking LOVE driving around Dallas on a lovely, sunny day!!

J F K

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Hello Indians of the Americas, here's some small pox #Go Europe!

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By *layfullsam OP Man over a year ago

Solihull

Chernobyl Power Plant- Just started a routine check of the reactoooohhhhhhh shiiiiit

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By *hampagne and aleCouple over a year ago

great yarmouth

Da stupid biatch is no betta than them others

Henry 8th

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Bloody hell, my eye doesn't half hurt.

King Harold at the Battle Of Hastings

Just invented the Railway Locomotive!

Richard Trevithick - 1801

A cat saved my life tonight. On my way home from the Old Dolphin pub, my headlights were reflected in it's eyes and stopped me from coming off the road. This gives me an idea.

Percy Shaw - Inventor of the 'Cats Eye'

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By *hampagne and aleCouple over a year ago

great yarmouth

Oh I love going fast into tunnels, this is going to be soo much f

Princess Diana

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Just planning a little stroll with some mates through Austria, Hungary, Poland, France .......

Adolf Hitler (Heil me!!)

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By *abioMan over a year ago

Newcastle and Gateshead

alright, put those arrows down... you could have someones eye out with those!!!

King harold.... 1066

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

One small step for .....fuk it .....I'm on the moon ...LOL

Neil Armstrong

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By *hampagne and aleCouple over a year ago

great yarmouth

God I love burgers

Elvis

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"God I love burgers

Elvis "

Should that not be ....

I'm off to squeeze one out ....brb ...

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By *hampagne and aleCouple over a year ago

great yarmouth

One more candy crush invite from anyone in Poland and me and the boys are coming for you

Adolf

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By *inkxRabbitWoman over a year ago

Mostly in GU24

Just heard my father died. Fuck! That makes me Queen!

Queen Liz 2

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By *inaTitzTV/TS over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

Captain Scott - who needs to poke his head out the tent to find out what the weather is, with all these updates from Oates about snow?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I'm on top of the world!

Edmund Hillary - 1953

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Fuck you Sprite - 7U........

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Anybody know a good plumber?

Dennis Nielsen

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

What the fuck was that? Anyone know? Anyone there?

Hiroshima suburban resident.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Make up a Facebook statuse from a famous person or historic event through history

God dam apple fell out of a tree and hit me on the head

Isaac Newton"

Good thread idea btw Sam!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

That was really not funny. I am not amused.

Queen Victoria

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Just won Wimbledon. So happy.

Andy Murray (miserable fucker).

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By *thwalescplCouple over a year ago

brecon

E really does equal MC squared... I don't just make this shit up as I go along you know!

Albert Einstein

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

what's are fussing about there is only one plane up there

mayor of Hirosima

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I'm down here you silly cow, why don't you just send me a text.

Romeo

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By *urvymamaWoman over a year ago

Doncaster

How dare my sister not only turn up to my wedding wearing white but also having a better looking arse than mine

Kate Middleton

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Horniest sex game ev-

Michael Hutchence.

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By *inaTitzTV/TS over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

Bastard pictures thieves - 'Angry cat'?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Where's the wife Bertha disappeared to? And who's nicked my motorwagen?

Karl Benz - 5th August 1888

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By *inaTitzTV/TS over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

Onwards and Upwards, N Chamberlain 10/5/1940

Bad day to decide to give up the cigars, WS Churchill 10/5/1940

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I'm going for a shit.

Thomas Crapper

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 28/01/15 19:18:38]

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Well that was a boring phone call!

Thomas Watson (Alexander Graham Bell's assistant) 10th March 1876

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Haha Monica! ...my wife actually thinks I'm playing Golf..."

- Bill Clintons Blowjob.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If I get any more bloody game requests I'm going to chop your bloody head off

Elizabeth 1

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Did I leave the oven on?

Thomas Farriner (Baker) - Sunday 2nd September 1666

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By *ibbyhunterCouple over a year ago

keighley

is that thunder i can hear in the distance eva? ... hitler in his bunker 1945.

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By *erts_darlings1Couple over a year ago

watford

"I'm on top of the world!

Edmund Hillary - 1953"

I'm over the moon!

Neil Armstrong - 1969

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By *rcticFoxxxWoman over a year ago

Hereabouts

"Oh I love going fast into tunnels, this is going to be soo much f

Princess Diana "

I shouldn't have laughed!

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By *erts_darlings1Couple over a year ago

watford

"Supposed to be playing football today! Anybody know the rules?"

William Webb Ellis

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By *inaTitzTV/TS over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

I'm not ever drinking again - Dr Jekyll Monday.

No more Mr Nice Guy - Dr Jekyll Friday.

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By *rcticFoxxxWoman over a year ago

Hereabouts

This thread has made me realise that I need to brush up on my history...!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

It's a bit windy outside

Michael fish wannabe weather man

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By *erts_darlings1Couple over a year ago

watford

"Saw Mr D'Arcy again today, he was totes piss wet through!"

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By *yrdwomanWoman over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

BRB, Brutus and Cassius are popping over for a word.

Julius Caesar.

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By *yrdwomanWoman over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

Elephants sure can shit!

Hannibal

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I'm getting the hang of these selfies!

Like for a line

Mona Lisa

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Hitler has just invaded Poland.. Unfriend!

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By *yrdwomanWoman over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

Looking forward to todays swim.

Natalie Wood

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By *erts_darlings1Couple over a year ago

watford

"Used the Mary Berry book I got for Christmas today. Didn't go too well!"

Alfy the G

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Going to be offline for a while so hey just leave a pm

Lord Lucan

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

There's a reason i hold my arm like this and it's not to warm my hand. Short, vwe guy for local meets.

Napolean

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

When she said she was off for a ride on her horse i thought she meant ...

Catherine the Great's manservant.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Off to meet this Henry Tudor chap at Bosworth Field tomorrow. He wants a word about something.

Richard III - 21st August 1485

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By *erts_darlings1Couple over a year ago

watford

"Divorced, beheaded died! Divorced, beheaded, shit that was lucky. "

Katherine Parr

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Ooh, aren't those Greeks nice people. That's a lovely wooden horse they sent us.

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By *yrdwomanWoman over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

That was amusing

Queen Victoria

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Natives seem restless - lets just ride over and say Hi

Commander in Chief, Light Brigade

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Heading to the big smoke with ma homies, this party is gonna be bangin. Ben ain't gonna be so big when ma crew is in town lol 3 peace!

Guy Fawkes

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Wtf!!!! What kind of dipstick puts a sword in stone?? Gonna be a bugger to pull out!

Arthur - wannabe King!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Going on a trip next week, all expenses paid, they've even written a song for us with catchy lyrics, summin about "pick a bale o cotton"

Lea Roy

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By *erts_darlings1Couple over a year ago

watford

"Think we are going to get charged for making a mess in the hire car"

Mrs JFK

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Suns out, tunes on, let's not do a James Dean

Paul Walker

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By *yrdwomanWoman over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

Those *expletive deleted* will never find out what I've been up to.

R Nixon

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By *atcherofmyballsMan over a year ago

hereford

Got an eyefull today

King Harold

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Feeling a bit queasy, I'd best sit in the front

Rosa Parks

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By *erts_darlings1Couple over a year ago

watford

[Removed by poster at 28/01/15 20:44:33]

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By *atcherofmyballsMan over a year ago

hereford

[Removed by poster at 28/01/15 20:46:11]

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By *erts_darlings1Couple over a year ago

watford

"Anyone fancy a bit of Kiev? Mmmm, I know I do"

Vladimir Putin

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Awww shit!

Every bloody bastard that ever lived.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

'Fuck, it was meant to be Paul'

Mark Chapman, Dec 9th 1980

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By *rat32Couple over a year ago

North Notts

Emu and I are just going to check the ariel, no signal on any channels. BRB!

Rod hull

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By *yrdwomanWoman over a year ago

Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum

Awesome _iew from my house.

Pompeii resident.

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By *erts_darlings1Couple over a year ago

watford

[Removed by poster at 28/01/15 20:53:09]

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By *erts_darlings1Couple over a year ago

watford

"Awww shit!

Every bloody bastard that ever lived. "

Who posted that? God?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Anyone smell smoke?

1666 Pudding Lane

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

'I wish I had kids'

1975, Jimmy Saville and Gary Glitter

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Jeez Louise! That bath was cold....but I seem to have displaced an awful lot of water hmmmmmm????

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By *iewMan over a year ago
Forum Mod

Angus & Findhorn

I heard a gun go off and then----------------------

JFK

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

What was the name of that fucking indian again?

Severly injured skydiver.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Relationship status update.

Anne Boleyn

'Its complicated'

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Dunno where Frodo was last night but I heard him crying about 'having his ring destroyed'

Bilbo Baggins.

I know he said historical but its funny..

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Trumpet for sale

Mrs Roy Castle

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Anybody know a good patio layer in liverpool

Mandy Jordache

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Fucking hyped for this flight!

Passenger of flight mh370

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Fantastic thread OP

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Just nipping for a crafty fag

Captain of the Hindenburg

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Just found out my fathers darth fucking vader !!!!

And he chops my hand off, what a twat he is

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I'm on top of the world!

Edmund Hillary - 1953"
Thats what Corn flakes does for yer not forgetting Tensin when you need him..

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Just gonna invent and put together a Colussus decyphering machine to break the Enigma signals and if the government don't like it they can suck my dick.

Big Al

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Just won Wimbledon. So happy.

Andy Murray (miserable fucker)."
Yeah could,nt be happier game set and Match..

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By *ngel n tedCouple over a year ago

maidstone

Just firebombed dresden

Winston liked your status

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By *inkxRabbitWoman over a year ago

Mostly in GU24

"If I get any more bloody game requests I'm going to chop your bloody head off

Elizabeth 1 "

Exactly how I feel about blinking game requests. Off with their heads!

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By *argaryen starkCouple over a year ago

pinxton

argh i could bloody kill that brother of mine .....cain from the bible

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

There's a reason i hold my arm like this and it's not to warm my hand. Short, vwe guy for local meets.

Napolean"

The reason I hold my left breast is because if I held the other I'd feel a right tit

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Ok I'll do your Kik dare.

Lady Godiva

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Fuck me it's brass monkey weather today

David posing for Michaelangelo's statue

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Soz about the bomb lol

Enola Gay

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By *inaTitzTV/TS over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

Princess Elizabeth upon hearing her father has cancer:

'Woohoo! I've heard I may be coming up for promotion at work!'

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By *layfullsam OP Man over a year ago

Solihull

"Make up a Facebook statuse from a famous person or historic event through history

God dam apple fell out of a tree and hit me on the head

Isaac Newton

Good thread idea btw Sam!!

Thanks Paula

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Something's up, there's a power cut lol

Brb

Osama Bin Laden

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By *layfullsam OP Man over a year ago

Solihull

General Custer

Chased off a few pesky Indians and now all is quiet at little big horn

Off to shoot a few rabbits and will be home for tea

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By *layfullsam OP Man over a year ago

Solihull

Monica Lewinsky

Found out I can blow smoke rings out of my vagina

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

At 03:00 Mary gave birth to a baby boy. We have called him Jesus. Mary said he's got my nose. Proud dad Joseph

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

03:10 - We said we wanted to ride some ass for days NOT ride on an ass for days :-/

Three Kings

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By *izzy RascallMan over a year ago

Cardiff

David Cameron at Celtic Manner with my buddies, Barrack, Angela and Phillipe, going to be a mad few days of partying.

Nov 2014

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By *hampagne and aleCouple over a year ago

great yarmouth

One more pint ? Oh go on then what do the doctors know.

George Best

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Just hooked up with this divine babe on sunset boulevard

Luckily she has never heard of Hugh Grant. My secret will be safe tonight. Lol

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By *ikki ShooterTV/TS over a year ago

Epsom

@Westminster... You'll never get me...ha ha ha

Guy Fawkes

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Now THIS is what i call riding bareback!!!

Lady Godiva

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Off to South America it film a Christmas special

Something vaguely familiar about the reg no on that Porsche?

Shouldn't be too long

Brb

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"That was really not funny. I am not amused.

Queen Victoria"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"That was really not funny. I am not amused.

Queen Victoria

Lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I'm going to push that red button in a bit

Captain of the challenger shuttle

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Can someone turn the heating up its freezing in here?

Sergei Frozanackeroff

"sent from near Chernobyl 51 mins ago"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Had another tiff with Henry, sure things will be fine in the morning though.

Anne Boleyn

May 18th 1536

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Dropped a bollock at work, pretty certain that nobody noticed, will sort it out in the morning

Nick Leeson

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

We forgot the sports calendar back in the future

Michael j Foxx

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Anyone smell smoke?

1666 Pudding Lane "

That's what my Thomas Farriner comment was about, for it was his bakery

There are some really good ones on here

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Mum is looking hot tonight - Oedipus

Sigmund Freud liked this

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By *layfullsam OP Man over a year ago

Solihull

Buzz Aldrin

Can someone pop out and get me a Mc Donald's i am starving and we can finish the moon landing film later

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By *verysmileMan over a year ago

Canterbury

Gott, Mein Schatze needings ein party mit diese Russchians like a hole in dem kopf.

Eva Braun April '45

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

He thinks a fucking slingshot's going to defeat me! Have a word with yourself, you fucking shortarse!

Goliath

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

One more injection won't make a difference, will it?

Michael Jackson.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Oh shit, my boots are all wet

King Canute

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Monday - hid

Tuesday - hid

Wednesday - hid

Thursday - hid

Friday - hid

Saturday - hid

Sunday - hid

Anne Franks

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Day 39

FFS its still raining

Noah

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Monday - hid

Tuesday - hid

Wednesday - hid

Thursday - hid

Friday - hid

Saturday - hid

Sunday - hid

Anne Franks"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Why is the news making such a big deal about this asteroid that's about to hit the planet FFS.. What's the worst that can happen? ??

T.Rex

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Oy Shaka Zulu!

Heard you are on your way to Rorkes Drift?

Bring it on pal!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Mum is looking hot tonight - Oedipus

Sigmund Freud liked this"

Very clever

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I hope I can set another Water Speed Record today #jetstream - Sir Donald Campbell 4/1/1967, Location: Coniston.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Off to see a man about a race! Can't wait! This is gonna make me!

James Dean.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

This is the start of everything #bigbang.

- God (Dawn of time)

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I think we got him this time! #seeyounelson - Napolean 21/10/1805

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By *layfullsam OP Man over a year ago

Solihull

Sir Francis Drake-

Returned from a world voyage with just two bloody new plants, sure neither of them will catch on

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By *ikki ShooterTV/TS over a year ago

Epsom

Met Vikings today. Seem a nice bunch. Want to take me on a small sporting holiday.....

Hamed Ibn falan just before his abduction.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Who the fuck are you calling short you english twat! That's it I'm getting my mates..

Napoleon Bonaparte

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By *ikki ShooterTV/TS over a year ago

Epsom

Brutus has been a bit distant since this thing with cleo.... Sure it'll pass.

Now off to give my speech (wish me luck)

J. Cesar

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By *ackspopCouple over a year ago

Wymondham

Off to the moon. Brb.

Neil Armstrong.

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By *ogistical NightmaresCouple over a year ago

Manchester Area

Sir Alex Ferguson and David Beckham boot incident...... Relationship status - its complicated

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Just been flashing cart drivers in Coventry, PMSL - Lady Godiva

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Reckon I can get Monica to put two hands and a face on this and make it a clock #BigBill

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Day 39

FFS its still raining

Noah"

A bit like living in Scotland....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Day 39

FFS its still raining

Noah

A bit like living in Scotland...."
You can smile inside though...

Now historical:

That's it I'm cancelling Christmas - Oliver Cromwell.

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By *_nnyeasygoingMan over a year ago

Somewhere on the M62 between 24 and 14

Hi Rose, just finished up the garden and patio, going to settle the new lodger in then start in the basement. Can you get a pint if milk on way home.

Fred x

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By *ee VianteWoman over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

That was a fuck to end all fucks! - Freddie Mercury

Couldn't be arsed to make my bed today - Tracey Emin

They say it's going to be hot later - Joan of Arc

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"That was a fuck to end all fucks! - Freddie Mercury

Couldn't be arsed to make my bed today - Tracey Emin

They say it's going to be hot later - Joan of Arc

You're a genius, quality

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By *ee VianteWoman over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

Be careful everyone, it's icy out today - Dr. Atkins

Don't be stupid! Of course I can walk in those shoes - Naomi Campbell

(Ok, not historical, live with it!)

It was bit nippy out today

- Lady Godiva

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I win, I win

None can beat me at hide and seek......

Madeleine McCann

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Henry Tudor went from married to its complicated

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Churchill

Just won the war lol

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By *ee VianteWoman over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

I've finally seen the light! - Thomas Edison

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By *ee VianteWoman over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

Got a bit of a shock today - Nikola Tesla

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Things are really starting to heat up...Joan of Arc

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By *ippcoupe2Couple over a year ago

cahir/cashel

"not the strap on tonight josephine"

napoleon to josephine

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By *_nnyeasygoingMan over a year ago

Somewhere on the M62 between 24 and 14

Been enjoying the wind in my hair and the sea breeze on my face. Went to the room to rest, woke up in a dingy... WTF

Update status of Lt W Bligh

Liked by F Christian and 66 others

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Michael Jackson: just chilling with ma homie! - was with Conrad Murray

Whitney Huston: just gonna have a nice hot relaxing bath

Martin Luther King: Dude, I had the freakiest dream last night!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

*snort* They think I'm a virgin....

- Elizabeth I

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If that Trotsky asks me to get more ice for his vodka one more time!...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Fuck it, broke another quill

Samuel Pepys

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

But Emmeline, if you win the vote that'll result in namby pamby fuckers like Clegg selling out his principles for a share of power.

Grandad Milliband

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By *layfullsam OP Man over a year ago

Solihull

neep neep

roadrunner

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Sassinfrassinshrassinfrasshin..

Muttley

Posted from The Mean Machine

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Tommy Atkins wrote:

Cold, wet, and the Krauts are in a bad mood. #HomeByChristmas - The Somme

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sassinfrassinshrassinfrasshin..

Muttley

Posted from The Mean Machine"

Haha! This made me laugh so much

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By *ee VianteWoman over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

Up, up and away! It's a beautiful day for it - Icarus

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By *ee VianteWoman over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

Another bad hair day. Another hairdresser frozen in horror

- Stheno

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By *inaTitzTV/TS over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

Caesar - Brutus says he's fed up of me asking in the forum about why I can't get a meet. Well fuck him! He won't do anything about it.

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By *layfullsam OP Man over a year ago

Solihull

out on the piss last night with my builder mates, hope nobody notices

Anonymous #Tower Of Pisa

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