FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Lessons in Discretion
Lessons in Discretion
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Last night whilst on a rugby team day/night out in Scunthorpe after an away match, my evening was ruined. A single young lady who I know from my time on Fab, and who was on my friend list after we'd exchanged various emails decided to shout out 'You're that guy on Fab Swingers!' right in front of my team mates, some of whom are neighbours and work colleagues. As a single guy I don't have to worry about girl friends or wives finding out (unlike you guys pretending to be single). I can even endure idiotic rugby player banter as I did all the way home to Hull last night...but I certainly don't want my neighbours and work mates knowing what I do away from rugby fields and power stations. Said gobby woman has now been deleted and blocked, now I have to see what happens. Has anyone else had to deal with a fellow fabber breaking the code of discretion? If so what were the consequences? |
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Meh, it's your own fault for going out in Scunthorpe!! Lucky that's all that happened and you didn't get stabbed or food poisoning from the kebab house 
**disclaimer** I lived in Scunthorpe for 30 years so can joke about it all I like! |
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It must have been horrible for you. Mist people will either have forgotten or won't care much by this morning and if you get any awkward questions deflect them by saying that she was having a laugh.
It will blow over in the meantime keep your head high you've done nothing wrong. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Last night whilst on a rugby team day/night out in Scunthorpe after an away match, my evening was ruined. A single young lady who I know from my time on Fab, and who was on my friend list after we'd exchanged various emails decided to shout out 'You're that guy on Fab Swingers!' right in front of my team mates, some of whom are neighbours and work colleagues. As a single guy I don't have to worry about girl friends or wives finding out (unlike you guys pretending to be single). I can even endure idiotic rugby player banter as I did all the way home to Hull last night...but I certainly don't want my neighbours and work mates knowing what I do away from rugby fields and power stations. Said gobby woman has now been deleted and blocked, now I have to see what happens. Has anyone else had to deal with a fellow fabber breaking the code of discretion? If so what were the consequences?"
return the favour next time you see her out you do the same. see how she likes it. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Just deny it. There's indiscreet people alllll overrrrr the place!!!!!
This!
Do you not think this would have been the easiest option?
A"
Why deny what I am? I'm not ashamed of this lifestyle. Are you?
However, I do like to keep my sex life away from other parts of my life. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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So you play rugby for a hull based team who had an away match in Scunthorpe yesterday and work in a power station? Indiscretion comes in several different varieties... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So you play rugby for a hull based team who had an away match in Scunthorpe yesterday and work in a power station? Indiscretion comes in several different varieties..."
That's what I took from it too...  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Over 200 rugby teams in Hull, the match wasn't in Scunthorpe and there's over a dozen power stations within a 50 mile radius of where I live. Besides which I've posted this on Fab and not Facebook. |
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By *ugby 123Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
Even though just on this thread you have given a lot of information out.....some people don't know the meaning of the word discretion.
We had a thread not long ago about the same thing, a woman started it, the answers were not the same at all |
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By *ugby 123Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
"Even though just on this thread you have given a lot of information out.....some people don't know the meaning of the word discretion.
We had a thread not long ago about the same thing, a woman started it, the answers were not the same at all "
To add, no matter how much info you would want to give out that isn't really the issue, shouting it across the room is not the done thing, in fact most people wouldn't say anything at all |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Personally, because I am also a single guy, I have never really hidden my lifestyle from anyone.
While I don't go round shouting about it, and tbh, have never directly mentioned fab to anyone other than a few who have since joined, I am open about my lifestyle to anyone who asks.
My colleagues in current and previous jobs know of my lifestyle and my "partner" on the works Christmas do was someone I met on fab. Several of my vanilla friends and a few of my neighbours are also aware.
No-one here is doing anything illegal, or imho immoral (well maybe the "singles" who aren't) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So you play rugby for a hull based team who had an away match in Scunthorpe yesterday and work in a power station? Indiscretion comes in several different varieties...
That's what I took from it too... "
There's a difference between information you choose to give out about yourself, and other people giving information about you.
OP most people probably won't remember, just say she was a friend having a laugh. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Over 200 rugby teams in Hull, the match wasn't in Scunthorpe and there's over a dozen power stations within a 50 mile radius of where I live. Besides which I've posted this on Fab and not Facebook."
Well said mate , the fact us that you were the victim here and others nit picking over your op seem to be missing the point  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Some people just want to put the Cunt in Scunthorpe.
Deny it. Say you turned her down in a bar a couple of months ago and she didn't take kindly to it so she's just out causing trouble. Followed by 'never heard of that site, but obviously she has!' |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Over 200 rugby teams in Hull, the match wasn't in Scunthorpe and there's over a dozen power stations within a 50 mile radius of where I live. Besides which I've posted this on Fab and not Facebook.
Well said mate , the fact us that you were the victim here and otyhers nit picking over your op seem to be missing the point "
I just thought it ironic given the subject header of 'lessons in discretion' that tge post in the face of it gave a lot of personal information away. Something many people do on here abd via status up dates. Of course the woman was out of order, her actions are impossible to justify. But the point I was making (perhaps unfairly given the op's subsequent reply) is that protecting our privacy is a 2 way process |
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By *Kgirl80Woman
over a year ago
South Coast |
This is awful  whether you're playing single, with partners consent or cheating... Whether your friends and family know, or they don't... Nobody should be 'outed' by another person.
I hope the fallout from this is minor OP |
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"Last night whilst on a rugby team day/night out in Scunthorpe after an away match, my evening was ruined. A single young lady who I know from my time on Fab, and who was on my friend list after we'd exchanged various emails decided to shout out 'You're that guy on Fab Swingers!' right in front of my team mates, some of whom are neighbours and work colleagues. As a single guy I don't have to worry about girl friends or wives finding out (unlike you guys pretending to be single). I can even endure idiotic rugby player banter as I did all the way home to Hull last night...but I certainly don't want my neighbours and work mates knowing what I do away from rugby fields and power stations. Said gobby woman has now been deleted and blocked, now I have to see what happens. Has anyone else had to deal with a fellow fabber breaking the code of discretion? If so what were the consequences?"
1. Was she on your coach ?
2. Did you just bump into her on the night out ?
3. How close was she to you when she said it ?
4. Did you answer her ?
5. Did she only say it the once ?
6. Did any of your 'neighbours' , 'friends', 'workmates' notice
7. Did they say anything ?
8. Did you say anything ?
9. Are you telling porky pies ? |
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By *afadaoMan
over a year ago
Staines |
"Last night whilst on a rugby team day/night out in Scunthorpe after an away match, my evening was ruined. A single young lady who I know from my time on Fab, and who was on my friend list after we'd exchanged various emails decided to shout out 'You're that guy on Fab Swingers!' right in front of my team mates, some of whom are neighbours and work colleagues. As a single guy I don't have to worry about girl friends or wives finding out (unlike you guys pretending to be single). I can even endure idiotic rugby player banter as I did all the way home to Hull last night...but I certainly don't want my neighbours and work mates knowing what I do away from rugby fields and power stations. Said gobby woman has now been deleted and blocked, now I have to see what happens. Has anyone else had to deal with a fellow fabber breaking the code of discretion? If so what were the consequences?
return the favour next time you see her out you do the same. see how she likes it. "
Well, she's on Fab too and made it pretty obvious by publicly announcing that she recognised someone else. So she's obviously not fussed about people knowing. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Just ignore it and ignore any comments that come up. If you're single what do you have to worry about? Sex isn't illegal (yet!)"
Today's news is tomorrow's chip shop paper, as the saying sort of goes |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Two things I have to say in response to her lack of discretion
1. You could have simply responded with 'I have no idea what you're talking about' or 'what's Fab swingers' or 'I think you have me confused with someone else'
2. While she may not have been seeking to intentionally cause you embarrassment by 'outing' you, she has in fact 'outed' herself - because, as it's been said before - for her to know you're on here means that she's on here too. |
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