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You know you're old when...
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You walk through town, looking at the women in the short skirts and skimpy tops and think...
Get some clothes on, you'll catch your death.
Oh dear @ me  "
No that's just being gay  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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that's a parent thing too, worrying about people without a coat on lol.
i know i'm old when i see anyone i went to school with and they're wrinkly as fuck and i think "how did that happen". |
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When you groan bending to pick something up, grunt getting out of the chair and taking the length of the room to straighten up and take half an hour for your joints to loosen up when you get up in the morning. Fuck me, I'm officially ancient!!!!!! Lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You know your old when you look at your doctor and think no way is he old enough to be a doctor
or
when your sat in a pub and want to go round IDing half the customers |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"footsie is an immoral outrage
Well it is isn't it? 
What's footsie?
Feet meeting under the table in a suggestive and sexual manner. Shocking! It'll be sex with the lights on and no nightie next."
That's disgusting.
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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago
Titz Towers, North Notts |
"You make a noise when sitting down 
That's wind Tina love.....try charcoal biscuits "
I'm too much of a lady for wind. Apart from that, if I farted hallway through sex, I'd worry that some fellow was thinking I was trying to give him a blow job, but hadn't read the manual....  |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"You know when you are really old when a new colleague starts work and you realise you have been doing the job longer than they have been on the planet!"
Don't! I was working with an organisation this summer where everyone there hadn't been born when I started working.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You make a noise when sitting down
That's wind Tina love.....try charcoal biscuits
I'm too much of a lady for wind. Apart from that, if I farted hallway through sex, I'd worry that some fellow was thinking I was trying to give him a blow job, but hadn't read the manual.... "
thats is so f*ng funny!...you just made me spit out my wine! |
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By *ltravioletWoman
over a year ago
In amongst the Unicorns & fairy dust |
"You know when you are really old when a new colleague starts work and you realise you have been doing the job longer than they have been on the planet!
Don't! I was working with an organisation this summer where everyone there hadn't been born when I started working.
"
ohhhhh but it's so do much fun when they try to seduce you at the office party and you flick them off by saying acquire some life experiences then come back and try harder ,,,. Much harder !!!  |
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By *smCouple
over a year ago
Liskeard |
You plan your journeys up stairs and put things there ready so you don't have to go back down then up again .
You finally find something your looking for only to forget why you wanted it ! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You know when you are really old when a new colleague starts work and you realise you have been doing the job longer than they have been on the planet!"
 +1 or they tell you their parents are getting on a bit but are 2 years younger than me... Her |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Trannies know we're old when our facial completion no longer reacts to industrial sized applications of the most potent military-strength weapon-grade anti-wrinkle cream available and we are left with no choice but too accept that even with good make-up, our face will always resemble the furrowed contours of a portly mountain gorillas scrotum….. |
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By *londeCazWoman
over a year ago
Arse End of the Universe, Cumbria |
"And I remember my nan's twin tub with a mangle attached...  Her
My MOTHER had one of those...  "
My grandma and my mam both had twin tubs with mangles...my first washing machine back in 1985 was also a twin tub, but didn't have a mangle...I tell ya, the orgasms off a twin tub spin were pretty spectacular |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"And I remember my nan's twin tub with a mangle attached... Her
My MOTHER had one of those...
My grandma and my mam both had twin tubs with mangles...my first washing machine back in 1985 was also a twin tub, but didn't have a mangle...I tell ya, the orgasms off a twin tub spin were pretty spectacular "
Twin tubs?? kin'ell I can remember dolly and tubs, and no, it's not someones profile name |
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By *unPeteMan
over a year ago
Near Bristol |
"You walk through town, looking at the women in the short skirts and skimpy tops and think...
Get some clothes on, you'll catch your death.
Oh dear @ me "
... you're walking through town and you've forgot why you've gone into town! Then you see skimpily clad women and town doesn't seem to be such a bad place to be!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You walk through town, looking at the women in the short skirts and skimpy tops and think...
Get some clothes on, you'll catch your death.
Oh dear @ me "
when Yer cock needs a jumper and hat |
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You start wearing glitter.
When I was 18 my best friend and I noticed that the older ladies in our club of choice loved the glitter. In their hair, in the fabric of their clothes, on their skin.
I now have a couple of sparkly tops, sparkly dry shampoo, and my 'going out look' isn't complete without shimmery body lotion.
 |
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By *win PeaksCouple
over a year ago
Northamptonshire |
I was watching Ajax v Utrecht on the tele and when they lined up in the tunnel i swear there wasn't one that looked older than 15.
When this sort of thing keeps happening you know you're getting on a bit.
Dave |
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By *win PeaksCouple
over a year ago
Northamptonshire |
"You start wearing glitter.
When I was 18 my best friend and I noticed that the older ladies in our club of choice loved the glitter. In their hair, in the fabric of their clothes, on their skin.
I now have a couple of sparkly tops, sparkly dry shampoo, and my 'going out look' isn't complete without shimmery body lotion.
It could be worse, you could be going for the 'blue rinse' look.
"
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