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By *adybee77 OP Woman
over a year ago
MAMOBA, miles and miles of bugger all (Aberdeenshire) |
Kids so bloody cruel?
We were at a birthday party this morning, and all the kids were talking about another party this afternoon (that my son is the only child in the class not invited to) and the little girl who had the later party said she told her mummy not to invite him because she didn't want a retard at her party. He only told me while having dinner 
I've just had to spend an hour doing cuddles and explaining that retard is a nasty name, and that only bad people use it, and that it doesn't matter about not being invited.
He does have a learning delay and a speech impediment, but this makes my heart break for him. Hate seeing my son so upset. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Children aren't fully developed both mentally and physically hence the fact responsible adult guidance is profoundly important.
That's a sad situation. I hope you managed to communicate with your child and the parents involved so all can offer guidance to their kids. |
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Poor little lad!
If my daughter had told me not to invite a kid to her party because she didn't want 'retards' there I'd have cancelled it altogether. It's up to us parents to teach our kids what's not acceptable - and that wasn't acceptable. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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That's awful. I'm shocked when parents let their kids be so unkind. Explaining things to kids and making them rounded people is a huge part of being a parent. X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Occassionally you can blame parents for the attitudes their children have. And alot of children understand a lot more than we all think. If they hear it they will say it in the same tone and context as the adult said it. I see this everyday. The attitutude that child had towards your son was probably picked up from either another child or an adult. I'd be kicking off big style. Children should have a basic understanding of children with disabilities etc |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sweetie that is so horrible for you to hear as a mum. Kids can be cruel. At least your son could tell you which says alot about you as a loving parent, and you could deal with it together. Cuddles and kind words hopefully made him feel better. Surround your child with kindness. It's a horrible world out there. Big hugs to you both. |
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By *adybee77 OP Woman
over a year ago
MAMOBA, miles and miles of bugger all (Aberdeenshire) |
"Please give your son an extra big hug tonight.......
and tell him how much you love him......And how special he is to you!
Hold him tight and let him feel your love.
very best wishes,
James xxxxx  "
Thank you all.
We had massive cuddles and I climbed into his bed beside him for extra special bedtime snuggles.
He knows he is a very special wee lad, and how loved he is, I tell him all the time. He's so gentle and loving - and to hear people talking about him like this has reduced me to tears. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Oh that is awful for your little one.
Would it be worth chatting to his school so they can consider tackling the issue in class? To educate and foster better understanding
My son has a visual impairment and has an artificial eye which did attract a lot of attention at school and this is how his school tackled it.
My son took out his eye and scared half the class one Halloween....was funny but did explain he can't go round scaring people with this 'party trick' |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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that is trully sad. blame it on the girls parents for stating such a fact. If a child said this a party would be cancelled - if this was done in my house that is, and made to apologise to your son. most kids follow what a parent states and should be brought to the attention of said parent .
give him my hugs this evening , and hope he is well . No one has a right to say a bad word to another , even if one is differnt. what a sad world this is if people cannot be nice to another . kids learn this at the feet of their parents
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"that is trully sad. blame it on the girls parents for stating such a fact. If a child said this a party would be cancelled - if this was done in my house that is, and made to apologise to your son. most kids follow what a parent states and should be brought to the attention of said parent .
give him my hugs this evening , and hope he is well . No one has a right to say a bad word to another , even if one is differnt. what a sad world this is if people cannot be nice to another . kids learn this at the feet of their parents
"
 |
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"Oh that is awful for your little one.
Would it be worth chatting to his school so they can consider tackling the issue in class? To educate and foster better understanding
My son has a visual impairment and has an artificial eye which did attract a lot of attention at school and this is how his school tackled it.
My son took out his eye and scared half the class one Halloween....was funny but did explain he can't go round scaring people with this 'party trick'"
Serves them right  |
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By *D40Couple
over a year ago
Wolverhampton |
"Kids so bloody cruel?
We were at a birthday party this morning, and all the kids were talking about another party this afternoon (that my son is the only child in the class not invited to) and the little girl who had the later party said she told her mummy not to invite him because she didn't want a retard at her party. He only told me while having dinner
I've just had to spend an hour doing cuddles and explaining that retard is a nasty name, and that only bad people use it, and that it doesn't matter about not being invited.
He does have a learning delay and a speech impediment, but this makes my heart break for him. Hate seeing my son so upset. "
The only retard I see is the parents who raised that girl with a mean nasty streak.
Much hugs for your little man, may he grow up without encountering such a nasty thing again xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Kids can be cruel but not usually if they are told about why some people are different and that they shouldn't say nasty things. I remember when I was a kid my mum used to say people shouldn't poke fun at people with problems like that because they never know they might have a kid like that themselves one day.
Adults can be just as nasty though even on this site. |
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"Kids can be cruel but not usually if they are told about why some people are different and that they shouldn't say nasty things. I remember when I was a kid my mum used to say people shouldn't poke fun at people with problems like that because they never know they might have a kid like that themselves one day.
Adults can be just as nasty though even on this site."
Oh yes......  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Your poor lad, what a horrid thing to say. Parents and children are often thoughtless and unfortunately do not even think of the hurt their comments cause. Differences are to be embraced not used against others. I am glad he was able to talk to you about it though. I would never have let my children invite everyone in the class bar one child, that's just not what most normal parents do. I hope Mummy cuddles have made him feel better. They are the best kind. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Kids can be cruel but not usually if they are told about why some people are different and that they shouldn't say nasty things. I remember when I was a kid my mum used to say people shouldn't poke fun at people with problems like that because they never know they might have a kid like that themselves one day.
Adults can be just as nasty though even on this site.
Oh yes...... "
Nasty about people with learning disabilities which is what I thought the post was about. So you have noticed it yourself then. |
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"Kids can be cruel but not usually if they are told about why some people are different and that they shouldn't say nasty things. I remember when I was a kid my mum used to say people shouldn't poke fun at people with problems like that because they never know they might have a kid like that themselves one day.
Adults can be just as nasty though even on this site.
Oh yes......
Nasty about people with learning disabilities which is what I thought the post was about. So you have noticed it yourself then."
Not on this site, I though they were talking about *adults* on this site just being generally nasty. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My autistic son never got invited to parties either. We always did one for him though, just family.
Ignorant, uneducated and stupid parents not to invite your child. "
Mine get invited and I worry constantly they are going to do something that means they never get invited again.
One of mine has bitten the same lad at school 3 times now. My son really likes this lad and but when all the other kids get excited, he can bite.
But his parents still invited my sons to the lads birthday party. I was SO, SO grateful. Can't put it into words. They rightly held the school responsible for not supervising my son more. (He now finally has supervision in place!)
There ARE some good parents and lovely kids out there. Don't lose all hope.
You just have to hunt them out.
And I totally agree, this kid had heard it from someone - an adult or another child. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Kids can be cruel but not usually if they are told about why some people are different and that they shouldn't say nasty things. I remember when I was a kid my mum used to say people shouldn't poke fun at people with problems like that because they never know they might have a kid like that themselves one day.
Adults can be just as nasty though even on this site.
Oh yes......
Nasty about people with learning disabilities which is what I thought the post was about. So you have noticed it yourself then.
Not on this site, I though they were talking about *adults* on this site just being generally nasty. "
Yes I thought you were.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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How disgraceful. I agree that if my daughter said something so appalling I'd cancel her birthday party for being so horrible.
My son has had similar issues - he is autistic and has ADHD and had one birthday party invite in 5 years at that school. I've seen him cry over being singled out for exclusion so many times. Awful to watch your child in such pain inflicted by other kids.
Kids should be taught to appreciate and respect each other's differences, not to alienate one another. Shame on that girls parents for not dealing with it. x |
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