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It's Saturday evening.......
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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There's birthday boys n girls in the place. There's rubbish on the telly so only one thing for it..........
Paaaaaaaarrrrrty!!!!!!!!!!
Got room for a few 'ere  |
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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago
dirtybigbadsgirlville |
"There's birthday boys n girls in the place. There's rubbish on the telly so only one thing for it..........
Paaaaaaaarrrrrty!!!!!!!!!!
Got room for a few 'ere "
I will sit quietly in the corner and watch......  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"There's birthday boys n girls in the place. There's rubbish on the telly so only one thing for it..........
Paaaaaaaarrrrrty!!!!!!!!!!
Got room for a few 'ere I will sit quietly in the corner and watch...... "
Tequilla?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"There's birthday boys n girls in the place. There's rubbish on the telly so only one thing for it..........
Paaaaaaaarrrrrty!!!!!!!!!!
Got room for a few 'ere I will sit quietly in the corner and watch...... "
I have just one word to say to you femme!
Tequila    |
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"There's birthday boys n girls in the place. There's rubbish on the telly so only one thing for it..........
Paaaaaaaarrrrrty!!!!!!!!!!
Got room for a few 'ere I will sit quietly in the corner and watch......
Tequilla?
"
Don't give her any tequila |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Well I'm sat at home with a really nasty cold feeling sorry for my self....but a party might be just the thing the doctor ordered. "
don't you be bringing the lurgy around here |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I have some cross stitch to do...you lot carry on.....
You knitting me a willy warmer for Xmas  I can't knit.... "
Damn. I'll have to find other ways to keep my willy warm  |
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"I have some cross stitch to do...you lot carry on.....
I've a hole in my left sock any chance while your at it Ya can't mend a sock with cross stitch and I am not allowed a darning needle. "
Awww don't be mean you can't let me walk around with my big toe sticking out  |
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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago
dirtybigbadsgirlville |
"I have some cross stitch to do...you lot carry on.....
I've a hole in my left sock any chance while your at it Ya can't mend a sock with cross stitch and I am not allowed a darning needle.
Awww don't be mean you can't let me walk around with my big toe sticking out "
Your necking JD, after a few of those you won't give a feck. |
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By *adybee77Woman
over a year ago
MAMOBA, miles and miles of bugger all (Aberdeenshire) |
I wish...
Home with the 5 yr old, just in from the christmas lights switch on in our village, away to have steak and potatoes, dancing to strictly with the most handsome 5 year old (I'm biased) and just bought the last of my christmas presents! Yay! |
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"I have some cross stitch to do...you lot carry on.....
I've a hole in my left sock any chance while your at it Ya can't mend a sock with cross stitch and I am not allowed a darning needle.
Awww don't be mean you can't let me walk around with my big toe sticking out Your necking JD, after a few of those you won't give a feck. "
Ye ok good point |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I'll pop a cheeky christmas song CD on
Awww noooooo please mercy mercy "
Fear not, it's one of the few CD's I'll ever own. Unless I'm using them for drinks coasters |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Yeah I can do me dad dancing 
Oh fook no...clearly not safe to return yet hey I can bust some shapes Yer know "
Big fish, little fish, cardboard box?
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Yeah I can do me dad dancing
Oh fook no...clearly not safe to return yet hey I can bust some shapes Yer know
Big fish, little fish, cardboard box?
"
yeah that's the one |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Yeah I can do me dad dancing
Oh fook no...clearly not safe to return yet hey I can bust some shapes Yer know
Big fish, little fish, cardboard box?
yeah that's the one "
I know that one...
A synchro' duet of shape throwing? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Yeah I can do me dad dancing
Oh fook no...clearly not safe to return yet hey I can bust some shapes Yer know "
The only thing I bust when I dance is my trousers  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Yeah I can do me dad dancing
Oh fook no...clearly not safe to return yet hey I can bust some shapes Yer know
The only thing I bust when I dance is my trousers Thats cause ya balls have drooped. "
Drooped? They scrape the feckin' floor. Brings a whole new meaning to Ballroom Dancing. I need enough room to ensure they don't get trodden on |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Yeah I can do me dad dancing
Oh fook no...clearly not safe to return yet hey I can bust some shapes Yer know
The only thing I bust when I dance is my trousers Thats cause ya balls have drooped.
Drooped? They scrape the feckin' floor. Brings a whole new meaning to Ballroom Dancing. I need enough room to ensure they don't get trodden on Least you can polish a wooden floor in half the time "
you know when you imagine sommething in your minds eye - well |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Yeah I can do me dad dancing
Oh fook no...clearly not safe to return yet hey I can bust some shapes Yer know
The only thing I bust when I dance is my trousers Thats cause ya balls have drooped.
Drooped? They scrape the feckin' floor. Brings a whole new meaning to Ballroom Dancing. I need enough room to ensure they don't get trodden on Least you can polish a wooden floor in half the time
you know when you imagine sommething in your minds eye - well "
Far too vivid an image now |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Yeah I can do me dad dancing
Oh fook no...clearly not safe to return yet hey I can bust some shapes Yer know
The only thing I bust when I dance is my trousers Thats cause ya balls have drooped.
Drooped? They scrape the feckin' floor. Brings a whole new meaning to Ballroom Dancing. I need enough room to ensure they don't get trodden on Least you can polish a wooden floor in half the time
you know when you imagine sommething in your minds eye - well
Far too vivid an image now "
i used to dance ballroom and latin - and the fella used to grate wax onto the floor before we started - my imagination somehow evolved to include the spreading of the wax - oh hush sue this is getting beyond silly pmsl |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Yeah I can do me dad dancing
Oh fook no...clearly not safe to return yet hey I can bust some shapes Yer know
The only thing I bust when I dance is my trousers Thats cause ya balls have drooped.
Drooped? They scrape the feckin' floor. Brings a whole new meaning to Ballroom Dancing. I need enough room to ensure they don't get trodden on Least you can polish a wooden floor in half the time
you know when you imagine sommething in your minds eye - well
Far too vivid an image now
i used to dance ballroom and latin - and the fella used to grate wax onto the floor before we started - my imagination somehow evolved to include the spreading of the wax - oh hush sue this is getting beyond silly pmsl "
That's so wrong |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Yeah I can do me dad dancing
Oh fook no...clearly not safe to return yet hey I can bust some shapes Yer know
The only thing I bust when I dance is my trousers Thats cause ya balls have drooped.
Drooped? They scrape the feckin' floor. Brings a whole new meaning to Ballroom Dancing. I need enough room to ensure they don't get trodden on Least you can polish a wooden floor in half the time
you know when you imagine sommething in your minds eye - well
Far too vivid an image now
i used to dance ballroom and latin - and the fella used to grate wax onto the floor before we started - my imagination somehow evolved to include the spreading of the wax - oh hush sue this is getting beyond silly pmsl
That's so wrong "
hush - i canny get it out of my head - also have one of those carton sketch images in my head too - its gotten outta control - i feel pissed and only had a coffee |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"There is a new cocktail I want to try...Malibu, cranberry juice and persecco "
that actually sounds really nice. Enjoy anything with cranberry juice in it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Waxy Balls. "
ive gone through them all in the last hour - wax on wax off- good job im home alone my girlie wouldnt get this stupid guffaw i keep throwing about |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Yeah I can do me dad dancing
Oh fook no...clearly not safe to return yet hey I can bust some shapes Yer know
The only thing I bust when I dance is my trousers Thats cause ya balls have drooped.
Drooped? They scrape the feckin' floor. Brings a whole new meaning to Ballroom Dancing. I need enough room to ensure they don't get trodden on Least you can polish a wooden floor in half the time
you know when you imagine sommething in your minds eye - well
Far too vivid an image now
i used to dance ballroom and latin - and the fella used to grate wax onto the floor before we started - my imagination somehow evolved to include the spreading of the wax - oh hush sue this is getting beyond silly pmsl
That's so wrong
hush - i canny get it out of my head - also have one of those carton sketch images in my head too - its gotten outta control - i feel pissed and only had a coffee "
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Wax on, Wax off
Now look what you've started   "
you and femme started it with droopy bollocks scraping the floor - then my mind went into overdrive - so much for her sitting in the corner with a cup of tea and a sock to mend |
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"Wax on, Wax off
Now look what you've started
you and femme started it with droopy bollocks scraping the floor - then my mind went into overdrive - so much for her sitting in the corner with a cup of tea and a sock to mend "
She refused to mend my sock and now my big toes shivering. Tight moo |
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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago
dirtybigbadsgirlville |
"Wax on, Wax off
Now look what you've started
you and femme started it with droopy bollocks scraping the floor - then my mind went into overdrive - so much for her sitting in the corner with a cup of tea and a sock to mend
She refused to mend my sock and now my big toes shivering. Tight moo "
Take ya socks off then both ya feet will be cold.... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Wax on, Wax off
Now look what you've started
you and femme started it with droopy bollocks scraping the floor - then my mind went into overdrive - so much for her sitting in the corner with a cup of tea and a sock to mend
She refused to mend my sock and now my big toes shivering. Tight moo "
Man up, it's a cold toe |
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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago
dirtybigbadsgirlville |
"Your all just taking the piss now. Me and my poor toe don't have to take this abuse you know there's plenty of other places I can go for that. Walks off shivering toe in hand "
Get Doc to rest his balls on ya feet, keep em toasty. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Your all just taking the piss now. Me and my poor toe don't have to take this abuse you know there's plenty of other places I can go for that. Walks off shivering toe in hand Get Doc to rest his balls on ya feet, keep em toasty. "
oi oi oi....I'm very choosy about where I rest my balls |
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"Your all just taking the piss now. Me and my poor toe don't have to take this abuse you know there's plenty of other places I can go for that. Walks off shivering toe in hand Get Doc to rest his balls on ya feet, keep em toasty.
oi oi oi....I'm very choosy about where I rest my balls "
An im damn right pedantic about balls on my feet so trust me your very safe  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Your all just taking the piss now. Me and my poor toe don't have to take this abuse you know there's plenty of other places I can go for that. Walks off shivering toe in hand Get Doc to rest his balls on ya feet, keep em toasty.
oi oi oi....I'm very choosy about where I rest my balls
An im damn right pedantic about balls on my feet so trust me your very safe "
phew |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I only like one on one meets...can I please have missus twosome all to myself"
Sorry, no can do I'm afraid. Credit for trying tho'
The flattery's always appreciated |
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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago
dirtybigbadsgirlville |
"Your all just taking the piss now. Me and my poor toe don't have to take this abuse you know there's plenty of other places I can go for that. Walks off shivering toe in hand Get Doc to rest his balls on ya feet, keep em toasty.
oi oi oi....I'm very choosy about where I rest my balls
An im damn right pedantic about balls on my feet so trust me your very safe
phew "
You two doth protest too much. |
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"Your all just taking the piss now. Me and my poor toe don't have to take this abuse you know there's plenty of other places I can go for that. Walks off shivering toe in hand Get Doc to rest his balls on ya feet, keep em toasty.
oi oi oi....I'm very choosy about where I rest my balls
An im damn right pedantic about balls on my feet so trust me your very safe
phew You two doth protest too much. "
Trust you to suss us out  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I only like one on one meets...can I please have missus twosome all to myself
Sorry, no can do I'm afraid. Credit for trying tho'
The flattery's always appreciated "
sorry...typo..I meant Mr...missus can take a hike |
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"I only like one on one meets...can I please have missus twosome all to myself
Sorry, no can do I'm afraid. Credit for trying tho'
The flattery's always appreciated
sorry...typo..I meant Mr...missus can take a hike "
|
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I only like one on one meets...can I please have missus twosome all to myself
Sorry, no can do I'm afraid. Credit for trying tho'
The flattery's always appreciated
sorry...typo..I meant Mr...missus can take a hike "
As long as you promise to respect me in the morning |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Your all just taking the piss now. Me and my poor toe don't have to take this abuse you know there's plenty of other places I can go for that. Walks off shivering toe in hand Get Doc to rest his balls on ya feet, keep em toasty.
oi oi oi....I'm very choosy about where I rest my balls "
oh please - i went away for a sobering shower and change into fluffy robe and its gotten worse |
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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago
dirtybigbadsgirlville |
"Your all just taking the piss now. Me and my poor toe don't have to take this abuse you know there's plenty of other places I can go for that. Walks off shivering toe in hand Get Doc to rest his balls on ya feet, keep em toasty.
oi oi oi....I'm very choosy about where I rest my balls
oh please - i went away for a sobering shower and change into fluffy robe and its gotten worse"
Its their fault...they keep giving me lines....I cannot help myself.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Your all just taking the piss now. Me and my poor toe don't have to take this abuse you know there's plenty of other places I can go for that. Walks off shivering toe in hand Get Doc to rest his balls on ya feet, keep em toasty.
oi oi oi....I'm very choosy about where I rest my balls
oh please - i went away for a sobering shower and change into fluffy robe and its gotten worseIts their fault...they keep giving me lines....I cannot help myself. "
I'll give you lines...your inner child can write 100 times
"I must not take the piss out of Doc's balls" |
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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago
dirtybigbadsgirlville |
"Your all just taking the piss now. Me and my poor toe don't have to take this abuse you know there's plenty of other places I can go for that. Walks off shivering toe in hand Get Doc to rest his balls on ya feet, keep em toasty.
oi oi oi....I'm very choosy about where I rest my balls
oh please - i went away for a sobering shower and change into fluffy robe and its gotten worseIts their fault...they keep giving me lines....I cannot help myself.
I'll give you lines...your inner child can write 100 times
"I must not take the piss out of Doc's balls" "
ooooppppppps |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Your all just taking the piss now. Me and my poor toe don't have to take this abuse you know there's plenty of other places I can go for that. Walks off shivering toe in hand Get Doc to rest his balls on ya feet, keep em toasty.
oi oi oi....I'm very choosy about where I rest my balls
oh please - i went away for a sobering shower and change into fluffy robe and its gotten worseIts their fault...they keep giving me lines....I cannot help myself.
I'll give you lines...your inner child can write 100 times
"I must not take the piss out of Doc's balls" "
something not right there  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Your all just taking the piss now. Me and my poor toe don't have to take this abuse you know there's plenty of other places I can go for that. Walks off shivering toe in hand Get Doc to rest his balls on ya feet, keep em toasty.
oi oi oi....I'm very choosy about where I rest my balls
oh please - i went away for a sobering shower and change into fluffy robe and its gotten worseIts their fault...they keep giving me lines....I cannot help myself.
I'll give you lines...your inner child can write 100 times
"I must not take the piss out of Doc's balls"
something not right there "
You're right....
it should have been
"I must not extract the urine from Doc's balls" |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Your all just taking the piss now. Me and my poor toe don't have to take this abuse you know there's plenty of other places I can go for that. Walks off shivering toe in hand Get Doc to rest his balls on ya feet, keep em toasty.
oi oi oi....I'm very choosy about where I rest my balls
oh please - i went away for a sobering shower and change into fluffy robe and its gotten worseIts their fault...they keep giving me lines....I cannot help myself.
I'll give you lines...your inner child can write 100 times
"I must not take the piss out of Doc's balls"
something not right there
You're right....
it should have been
"I must not extract the urine from Doc's balls" "
i was thinking a bladder might be the treasure chest for pee |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Your all just taking the piss now. Me and my poor toe don't have to take this abuse you know there's plenty of other places I can go for that. Walks off shivering toe in hand Get Doc to rest his balls on ya feet, keep em toasty.
oi oi oi....I'm very choosy about where I rest my balls
oh please - i went away for a sobering shower and change into fluffy robe and its gotten worseIts their fault...they keep giving me lines....I cannot help myself.
I'll give you lines...your inner child can write 100 times
"I must not take the piss out of Doc's balls"
something not right there
You're right....
it should have been
"I must not extract the urine from Doc's balls"
i was thinking a bladder might be the treasure chest for pee"
I'm just using anatomical license..like poetic license but might be useful for toilet humour rather than poetry |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Your all just taking the piss now. Me and my poor toe don't have to take this abuse you know there's plenty of other places I can go for that. Walks off shivering toe in hand Get Doc to rest his balls on ya feet, keep em toasty.
oi oi oi....I'm very choosy about where I rest my balls
oh please - i went away for a sobering shower and change into fluffy robe and its gotten worseIts their fault...they keep giving me lines....I cannot help myself.
I'll give you lines...your inner child can write 100 times
"I must not take the piss out of Doc's balls"
something not right there
You're right....
it should have been
"I must not extract the urine from Doc's balls"
i was thinking a bladder might be the treasure chest for pee
I'm just using anatomical license..like poetic license but might be useful for toilet humour rather than poetry "
allowed - your anatomy is all to pot tonight anyhow |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"i darent ask if there is a doctor in the house - but i have a pain in my guts
wouldnt want to drag him out uneccesserily "
gaviscon or windeze is what you need |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"i darent ask if there is a doctor in the house - but i have a pain in my guts
wouldnt want to drag him out uneccesserily gaviscon or windeze is what you need "
see what the doc pulls out of his bag that may help |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"i darent ask if there is a doctor in the house - but i have a pain in my guts
wouldnt want to drag him out uneccesserily gaviscon or windeze is what you need
see what the doc pulls out of his bag that may help"
I have just the remedy. I keep it with my snake oil |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"i darent ask if there is a doctor in the house - but i have a pain in my guts
wouldnt want to drag him out uneccesserily "
Yep good thinking, splinters in the old nut-sac can be excrutiatingly painful. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"i darent ask if there is a doctor in the house - but i have a pain in my guts
wouldnt want to drag him out uneccesserily
Yep good thinking, splinters in the old nut-sac can be excrutiatingly painful. "
think hes polished the floor smooth |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Oh I have the hiccups now from laughing too much.....Doc you are a great sport xxxx
How often are a guys balls the centre of attention "
well they werent in hiding tonight were they ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Oh I have the hiccups now from laughing too much.....Doc you are a great sport xxxx
How often are a guys balls the centre of attention
well they werent in hiding tonight were they ? "
No it was warm enough for them to make an appearance |
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