FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Were a Swinger get me in there
Were a Swinger get me in there
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We are a honest , genuine, couple.. Which im sure you have all read a million times.. But we actually are..
We would just like to give a truley honest account of our experiences on here..
Before we start ranting we are not for one minute about to slag off Fabswingers or any other site..
All you are about to read is true and genuine...
We are happy married mid fortys couple who like most of you spoke about our fantasies to each other a million times. Ours being we would like to involve other people in our sex lives, nothing abnormal there...
We honestly didnt know how to achieve this so like every normal person we googled.
Up popped a million sites and we chose adult friendfinder, which cost us a small fortune. We didnt have a problem with that as we thought this would eliminate alot of weirdos and time wasters..
Lol how wrong we were... We found the site easy to use but full of time wasters and wannabes, understandable we guessed being the nature of what we were looking for.
After six months of searching through the weirdos. we finally found a couple that were serious and arranged a meet... Unfortunatly when we met we found that the lady was uncomfortable with the situation and obviously seemed to being bullied into the the unfortunate position she found herself to be in... We obviously worked this out in seconds and like any genuine people got the lady in question to safety and made sure she was ok.. So as our first experience of the swinging world, understandably this put some what of a downer of it all..
After this we came away from this site and found Fab, which at first glance we found to be more user friendly than the previous site..
We decided on advertising to meet a couple, which we found extremly hard to find...my wife started to talk to a single guy who came across as a realy nice person.. Not what we had agreed that we were looking for but as you will agree things change.. We disscussed us meeting a single guy for our first experience and agreed it was something thag we both wanted to experience... So we met him in a pub for a social, and sll was good.. We explained that it was only ever going to be a social and nothing else which he was fine with.., after this meet the guy became very full on and constantly bombarding the wife wife with messages and text asking when we were going to meet and play... This made my wife extremly uneasy and uncomfortable so we decided to delete our membership..
About 4 months went by and we were always disscussing how we felt and what happened, and we both decided that we wernt going to let some weirdo put us off trying to experience the life of swinging. We set up another profile , which is the one were using now and tried again so to speak..
The problem we have with sites like this is, yes were new, yes were not super models, yes were not ready for clubs yet... But other than that, yes we are totally genuine and want to experience what this all offers, but alot of people seem to forget that they were new once also...
Yes its hard, we totally understand that, it is a numbers game and like anything in life , you will only get out of it what you put in.., but please, for god sakes Fab, vet people more who apply to this site.. Were getting single guys who are acting as couples and all sorts.. There are some nice and genuine people on here but its like 20 % good to 80 % bad... This is not good and spoiling it for the genuine people on here...
We dont know the numbers for the amount of swingers in this country or any other but we would imagine its alot higher than people think... So please from buisness man to another, you have a great site that is being spoilt by idiots that are not being vetted, sort it out, make your millions, but last of all, provide us all with a swinginging site that is full of genuine and real normal people...
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"We appreciate you stating the obvious, it is a tool for peoples needs.. What were saying is, Fab is good, not a problem with what they do, were suggesting they make it a bit easier, and if that means charging a bit more for the service then were sure that the genuine people wouldnt mind that., if it meant they hadnt got to put up with people saying there someone there not, which im sure you must have experienced in the past . " You found out yourself that a site that charges people a fortune still didn't prevent you from having problems. How would increasing a voluntary fee on here help you get people interested in you? | |||
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"It says the word " if " We dont pretend to know how these sites work, its a suggestion.. Look, we are not the enemy, we want a great site like everyone else, we dint care how it comes about, read the full post and not just the last paragraph" I read the whole post. You have valid points, but you have to take some responsibility yourselves sometimes. Use the site features, be discriminating, and make this site work for you. | |||
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"We don't personally have a problem we do group socials, forum socials and individual socials to get to know people we vet people ourselves and are more than capable of doing so. At a club you can do as much or as little as you want, you say your not ready for a club... Well we find them less pressured than a meet at a couples or our house "  totaly agree plus once you go to clubs the doors soon open , meet friends of friends and you are invited to private parties etc ... Is a big o world out there and Fab site is just a tiny bit of it  | |||
"Search engines may draw you to Fab your curious adventure to grab there are those who surf by without wonder or why and those without freedom to dab. One click and you enter it's web drawn in by desires flow and eb but maneuver is tricky cause Fabs web is sticky respectfully gentily tread. Fabs world has it's own pure dynamic hierarchy and class are indemic it shapes it's whole being some find it so freeing but others frustrating instead. Whether single married or both whether female male or both there's a place for you here with your baggage and fear but your place is determined by both. For some it will all lead to rants others become sycophant. But many stay true and remain of the view that you can't take the 'ter' out of 'bant'. For here men attack men as they compete in the forumite den to entice and win favour of a women to savour then discard as an overplucked hen. Some say men Market their wives and the power enhances their lives but wifes powers are greater and sooner or later she takes up the honour and drives. To women your ego will boost like drinking a citrus filled jooste but your grasp on reality may become a casualty and one day may return home to roost. There are some who just sit back and snipe there are some with a genuine gripe there are some who won't waiver some with tragic behavior and some with no thought before type. For some it is sadly judgemental can deliver a pain just like dental but lest we forget it's a portal at best because people will always be people. But deep at Fabs core and it's centre there is beauty and freindship and mentor there's the salt of the Earth there's the value and worth we are grateful to it's great inventor! (Fab is what you make it, it's not for everyone)." wow! Hidden talents there! Very good | |||
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"We don't personally have a problem we do group socials, forum socials and individual socials to get to know people we vet people ourselves and are more than capable of doing so. At a club you can do as much or as little as you want, you say your not ready for a club... Well we find them less pressured than a meet at a couples or our house totaly agree plus once you go to clubs the doors soon open , meet friends of friends and you are invited to private parties etc ... Is a big o world out there and Fab site is just a tiny bit of it "Totally with you there, I've said it many times in the past. Internet swinging is a tiny part of the scene and in some respects the most frustrating, all that sitting and waiting for something to happen and if you have to wait too long then it can cause errors in judgement. Clubs and private parties are where you can get it all over and done with without the waiting. Fab is a brilliant site and works really well as long as you use all the tools that are on offer, I've had 3 profiles on here over 7 or so years now and although my partner and I are stepping away from the internet part of the scene if we decide to return it will be to fab. | |||
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"So your saying.. That us getting messages as a first contact constantly with wording such as...... " can i come and fuck you " " show us your tits " " come and sit on my face " And you think thats good ??? We rest our case " What can site admin realistically do about that though? If you don't like that sort of message block the sender and then delete the emails. | |||
"So your saying.. That us getting messages as a first contact constantly with wording such as...... " can i come and fuck you " " show us your tits " " come and sit on my face " And you think thats good ??? We rest our case " Ok, I get them as well, and it doesn't matter how much is being charged, how/what on earth do you propose fab does to prevent them? You can't! So the best gift you have on here is common sense! Quite simple really and as a single female you would think it would be easy but guess what? it's not! Can I expect Fab to only pick people I am attracted to? Unfortunately that is something I have to do myself......  | |||
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"Appreciate what your saying Foxy, We havnt a clue how you stop it, we just like others were sure, would like something done..as this would make the site better " Of course it would....but you will never eradicate the idiots of the world, so as they say suck it up lollipop, and do I like it? Hell No! Is there anything I can do apart from having all my filters in place which I do have? Nope! I just 'ignore the dross' You will never stop it, regardless what anyone can do | |||
"O.p. your saying the site needs improving others don't agree it's as simple as that." I think the site is great. You will always get time wasters and idiots just like you do in real life.
OP you've already said that AFF cost you a small fortune and that it was full of fakes and time wasters, which means they have money too! All you'd achieve by asking a high membership fee is eliminate the genuine members as well. I pay the site fee through choice as it's £5 well spend and it helps Admin in a small way. If the site was to charge a high membership fee, I'd leave.
There are tools in place to help you as much as possible on here. Fab can only do so much. You have to take responsibility for your own actions and choices. In all the years I've been on here I've never had my time wasted by anyone and I've never had a no show. I've had a last minute cancellation once but as I'd not left the house, it was still not wasting my time.
If it aint broke, don't fix it I say. There are many many people on here who think Fab is fine that way it is  | |||
Blackspice! | |||
"We don't personally have a problem we do group socials, forum socials and individual socials to get to know people we vet people ourselves and are more than capable of doing so. At a club you can do as much or as little as you want, you say your not ready for a club... Well we find them less pressured than a meet at a couples or our house totaly agree plus once you go to clubs the doors soon open , meet friends of friends and you are invited to private parties etc ... Is a big o world out there and Fab site is just a tiny bit of it " Agree with this. I just use fab to keep in touch with people I meet in clubs. I have met people straight off here but the vast majority of people I've have met I've met in clubs and quite a few I've met through other people. Fab is a great tool for keeping in touch and finding out what events are happening in the clubs. The social side of going to a club is great and if you get to play is a bonus and you know the people there are genuine and less likely to be tidewaters.
block messages from single guys in your filters and you'll stop a lot of the "fancy a fuck?" type messages.
I suppose the only thing Fab could do is to provide a filter that will block first contact messages with less than a pre determined number of characters | |||
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