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THE HORNY LION PUBLIC HOUSE
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By *W69 OP Couple
over a year ago
Bournemouth |
It's back by popular demand, currently under temporary management and staff, until hopefully we see the Lion back behind the bar for good.
Pull up a seat, it's nearly the weekend, what you drinking? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's back by popular demand, currently under temporary management and staff, until hopefully we see the Lion back behind the bar for good.
Pull up a seat, it's nearly the weekend, what you drinking? "
Large Gin & Tonic please, ice and slice of lime and a wink from the barmaid  |
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"Fucking heck what a barmaid she is aswell.
I'll just have a for now.
 and a with ice? "
I seriously dont mind, if this was a real pub Id be there in my tracksuit trying to hide my angry boner.
Dont be put off, its a compliment |
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By *W69 OP Couple
over a year ago
Bournemouth |
"Fucking heck what a barmaid she is aswell.
I'll just have a for now.
and a with ice?
I seriously dont mind, if this was a real pub Id be there in my tracksuit trying to hide my angry boner.
Dont be put off, its a compliment"
Lol... Thick skinned bar staff you know
 |
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"Fucking heck what a barmaid she is aswell.
I'll just have a for now.
and a with ice?
I seriously dont mind, if this was a real pub Id be there in my tracksuit trying to hide my angry boner.
Dont be put off, its a compliment
Lol... Thick skinned bar staff you know
"
A bit like a bouncers head.
Well dont tell them about the pervert in the corner please.
I would expect you to bring my over aswell, you'd have to to be fair |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Pint of large and a whisky chaser please... well it is Friday. And have one yourself.
Do you have a plasma TV showing the football? No? Thank fuck for that |
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By *W69 OP Couple
over a year ago
Bournemouth |
You really can't get the same standard of staff in pubs these days! No bar staff for hours....Poor!
Trying to run a pub as well as your day jobs a nightmare! A good one though.
Sorry to leave you all hanging dry!
As an apology to all those who ordered above this rounds on us
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"oo bit early really but a mid afternoon g & t never did anybody much harm - ice and a slice please xxx
Sorry, here's your drink...run tagged here... Fancy helping out? "
sorry got called away - yes sleeves rolled up and happy to assist - collect the empties shall i and wipe down  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"here you go - no idea where the boss has gone - im collecting- chatting - washing up - now serving - sheesh "
The anarchy rules now that the landlord is UNLOS |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I poured myself a vodka and fizzy fruit water. Bloody service in here has gone right downhill. Nothing like it was in my day. I'm blaming them young hooligans,no respect any more. During the war... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"here you go - no idea where the boss has gone - im collecting- chatting - washing up - now serving - sheesh
The anarchy rules now that the landlord is UNLOS "
when i was asked if i wasnted to help didnt know id be doing the lot |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I poured myself a vodka and fizzy fruit water. Bloody service in here has gone right downhill. Nothing like it was in my day. I'm blaming them young hooligans,no respect any more. During the war..."
here have a bag of scratchings - on the house |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I poured myself a vodka and fizzy fruit water. Bloody service in here has gone right downhill. Nothing like it was in my day. I'm blaming them young hooligans,no respect any more. During the war...
here have a bag of scratchings - on the house"
Thanks. I'll sit over here in the corner minding me own business |
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By *W69 OP Couple
over a year ago
Bournemouth |
Blimey ... It's busy in here!
Some "swingers" would you believe it accosted us in the cellar looking for their car keys, and we've both had a hard time trying to get away from them with our dignity in tact! Phew!
Back to business, has everybody got there drinks now?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"double voddie and a rioja coming up - and save me a spot in that corner im going to come and hide there in a moment"
You can come sit right next to me darling. I'll tell you some of me old war stories
*pat pat* |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"double voddie and a rioja coming up - and save me a spot in that corner im going to come and hide there in a moment
You can't hide now!!!!
"
im due a break = gonna listen to some stories and have a little nibble whilst im there |
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By *W69 OP Couple
over a year ago
Bournemouth |
"double voddie and a rioja coming up - and save me a spot in that corner im going to come and hide there in a moment
You can't hide now!!!!
im due a break = gonna listen to some stories and have a little nibble whilst im there "
You've definitely earnt one... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What's the house policy on feeling up the staff?
Lol... Quite a relaxed one
As long as we can have a feel back .... "
ooooooo might request some overtime then |
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By *W69 OP Couple
over a year ago
Bournemouth |
"What's the house policy on feeling up the staff?
Lol... Quite a relaxed one
As long as we can have a feel back ....
ooooooo might request some overtime then "
Overtime request accepted.
We've warmed our hands up too....and as it only seems to be us in here |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What's the house policy on feeling up the staff?
Lol... Quite a relaxed one
As long as we can have a feel back ....
ooooooo might request some overtime then
Overtime request accepted.
We've warmed our hands up too....and as it only seems to be us in here "
Nobody'll notice if we ermmmmm, slip away for a moment or two then |
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By *W69 OP Couple
over a year ago
Bournemouth |
"What's the house policy on feeling up the staff?
Lol... Quite a relaxed one
As long as we can have a feel back ....
ooooooo might request some overtime then
Overtime request accepted.
We've warmed our hands up too....and as it only seems to be us in here
Nobody'll notice if we ermmmmm, slip away for a moment or two then "
Our thoughts exactly... The bars empty for this time on a Friday... Let's just sneak over in the corner... There's a rather attractive blonde barmaid over there too...
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"What's the house policy on feeling up the staff?
Lol... Quite a relaxed one
As long as we can have a feel back ....
ooooooo might request some overtime then
Overtime request accepted.
We've warmed our hands up too....and as it only seems to be us in here
Nobody'll notice if we ermmmmm, slip away for a moment or two then
Our thoughts exactly... The bars empty for this time on a Friday... Let's just sneak over in the corner... There's a rather attractive blonde barmaid over there too...
"
starts rubbing hands together |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What's the house policy on feeling up the staff? "
Hold on in waiting to be served
I need a glass, actually make that a pint of wine!!!
Oh and some salty snacks....thanks |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"What's the house policy on feeling up the staff?
Lol... Quite a relaxed one
As long as we can have a feel back ....
ooooooo might request some overtime then
Overtime request accepted.
We've warmed our hands up too....and as it only seems to be us in here
Nobody'll notice if we ermmmmm, slip away for a moment or two then
Our thoughts exactly... The bars empty for this time on a Friday... Let's just sneak over in the corner... There's a rather attractive blonde barmaid over there too...
starts rubbing hands together "
Now we've all got warm hands, who's first? |
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By *W69 OP Couple
over a year ago
Bournemouth |
"What's the house policy on feeling up the staff?
Hold on in waiting to be served
I need a glass, actually make that a pint of wine!!!
Oh and some salty snacks....thanks "
Sorry... Got distracted!
A pint! That sounds like a splendid idea...
Oh and some salty snacks..
Now where were we |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"What's the house policy on feeling up the staff?
Hold on in waiting to be served
I need a glass, actually make that a pint of wine!!!
Oh and some salty snacks....thanks
Sorry... Got distracted!
A pint! That sounds like a splendid idea...
Oh and some salty snacks..
Now where were we "
Warm n lecherous hands...................;) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"What's the house policy on feeling up the staff?
Hold on in waiting to be served
I need a glass, actually make that a pint of wine!!!
Oh and some salty snacks....thanks
Sorry... Got distracted!
A pint! That sounds like a splendid idea...
Oh and some salty snacks..
Now where were we "
Thank you my lovely
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"What's the house policy on feeling up the staff?
Hold on in waiting to be served
I need a glass, actually make that a pint of wine!!!
Oh and some salty snacks....thanks
Sorry... Got distracted!
A pint! That sounds like a splendid idea...
Oh and some salty snacks..
Now where were we
Thank you my lovely
"
Come n join the corner party |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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im actually in the mood for one of those bucket cocktails - and i found a box of those enormously long straws when i was tidying up in the back room - anybody want to make one up- anything for me so long as its not coconutty or aniseedy |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My signature cocktail is a hollowed out pineapple with the juice squeezed back into it, rum, pear brandy and lots of berries n crushed ice."
that will do |
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By *W69 OP Couple
over a year ago
Bournemouth |
"My signature cocktail is a hollowed out pineapple with the juice squeezed back into it, rum, pear brandy and lots of berries n crushed ice.
that will do "
That sounds lovely... We should name it as the house special!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"What's the house policy on feeling up the staff?
Hold on in waiting to be served
I need a glass, actually make that a pint of wine!!!
Oh and some salty snacks....thanks
Sorry... Got distracted!
A pint! That sounds like a splendid idea...
Oh and some salty snacks..
Now where were we
Thank you my lovely
Come n join the corner party "
Thought you'd never ask....  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My signature cocktail is a hollowed out pineapple with the juice squeezed back into it, rum, pear brandy and lots of berries n crushed ice.
that will do
That sounds lovely... We should name it as the house special!
"
the hornylion it is then |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Whose making the next one?
here you go - made two - only one pineapple left now - hope its up to scratch "
That's a hell of a shot of rum in it, you trying to get me squiffy? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Whose making the next one?
here you go - made two - only one pineapple left now - hope its up to scratch
That's a hell of a shot of rum in it, you trying to get me squiffy? "
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Whose making the next one?
here you go - made two - only one pineapple left now - hope its up to scratch
That's a hell of a shot of rum in it, you trying to get me squiffy?
"
Like your thinking, wanna double? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Whose making the next one?
here you go - made two - only one pineapple left now - hope its up to scratch
That's a hell of a shot of rum in it, you trying to get me squiffy?
Like your thinking, wanna double? "
does that involve using two straws |
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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago
dirtybigbadsgirlville |
"Whose making the next one?
here you go - made two - only one pineapple left now - hope its up to scratch
That's a hell of a shot of rum in it, you trying to get me squiffy?
Like your thinking, wanna double?
does that involve using two straws "
Thats feltching innit?  |
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By *W69 OP Couple
over a year ago
Bournemouth |
"Anybody fancy a slippery nipple on the house as we are running out of pineapples?
Are we still talking drinks or literally "
Lol...
We could always try a literal one first and then move on to the drinks?
Straws are optional |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Whose making the next one?
here you go - made two - only one pineapple left now - hope its up to scratch
That's a hell of a shot of rum in it, you trying to get me squiffy?
Like your thinking, wanna double?
does that involve using two straws "
We'd have to get very close though |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Whose making the next one?
here you go - made two - only one pineapple left now - hope its up to scratch
That's a hell of a shot of rum in it, you trying to get me squiffy?
Like your thinking, wanna double?
does that involve using two straws
We'd have to get very close though "
i can do close |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Any last orders at the bar because we are knackered after our first (half) day on the job and were going to call time for tonight?"
Yes, one giant, super king size bed for us all to retire to |
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By *W69 OP Couple
over a year ago
Bournemouth |
"Any last orders at the bar because we are knackered after our first (half) day on the job and were going to call time for tonight?
Yes, one giant, super king size bed for us all to retire to "
Now that's the best request we've had all night!
T I M E at the bar!!!!!
Just so happens we have one... Come on, what you waiting for |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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just loaded the last of the glasses into the washy thing - got a bit of the love potion left here still so no more for me thanks - i may just love everybody if i have more |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Any last orders at the bar because we are knackered after our first (half) day on the job and were going to call time for tonight?
Yes, one giant, super king size bed for us all to retire to
Now that's the best request we've had all night!
T I M E at the bar!!!!!
Just so happens we have one... Come on, what you waiting for "
Room for a little one and a big un?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"just loaded the last of the glasses into the washy thing - got a bit of the love potion left here still so no more for me thanks - i may just love everybody if i have more "
Get it in ya |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"just loaded the last of the glasses into the washy thing - got a bit of the love potion left here still so no more for me thanks - i may just love everybody if i have more
Get it in ya"
|
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By *W69 OP Couple
over a year ago
Bournemouth |
"Can I have a quick Jaggerbomb please before you close for business
You've gotta come n find us on the giant bed"
Wow... That was an unexpected end to the evening
Knew this pub lark would have it's benefits!
Will get chef to do a full English when your ready...... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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In the words of a famous song 'oh what a night'
I'll have to skip the brekky though, gotta get my fat ass to they gym, I'll never be as slim as Mrs N but I'll give it a damn good go |
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By *W69 OP Couple
over a year ago
Bournemouth |
"In the words of a famous song 'oh what a night'
I'll have to skip the brekky though, gotta get my fat ass to they gym, I'll never be as slim as Mrs N but I'll give it a damn good go "
Lol.... Your gyming after all that!
We would be also but have another naughty evening planned so going to have to skip the gym and save our energy for tonight.
Talking of tonight, you guys and the sexy blonde couple that were drinking The Lion special cocktail don't fancy holding the fort do you?
We are off to a club and won't be around.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"In the words of a famous song 'oh what a night'
I'll have to skip the brekky though, gotta get my fat ass to they gym, I'll never be as slim as Mrs N but I'll give it a damn good go
Lol.... Your gyming after all that!
We would be also but have another naughty evening planned so going to have to skip the gym and save our energy for tonight.
Talking of tonight, you guys and the sexy blonde couple that were drinking The Lion special cocktail don't fancy holding the fort do you?
We are off to a club and won't be around...."
i might be tempted |
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