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Masterbation with marmite

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By *hyllyphylly OP Man over a year ago

Bradford

(Inspired by another topic

)

What is the weirdest thing you've used sexually? Either alone or with parners

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By *hortieWoman over a year ago

Northampton

"(Inspired by another topic

)

What is the weirdest thing you've used sexually? Either alone or with parners"

I have fucked myself with many strange things. Amazing what becomes useful when you have no toys to hand.. (I take it this isn't solely about food??)

But if anyone does masturbate with marmite, its only wrong if i'm not there to clean it up

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Masturbating with Marmite may lead to a reoccurring yeast infection.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

its too bloody expensive - stick to the oil here - prefer marmite on my toast tvm

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By *hyllyphylly OP Man over a year ago

Bradford

I bet most men have used or thought about using a vacuum cleaner... with the hose attachment

Not me... honest

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Marmite? Hope he doesn't mind?? Whilst pregnant with my first child i was feeling ridiculously horny and came across - a boots moisturiser bottle! Not happened since!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

In my teens, I once carefully removed a banana from its peel...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

In my teens, I once carefully removed a banana from its peel...

Im pretty sure most people peel their bananas

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I once entertained a lady with two different sizes of Pom bottles.

Now that's 'ribbed for her pleasure'!

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By *uby0000Woman over a year ago

hertfordshire

too messy lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I like Mr Marmites posts but smashing one out with him is just out of the question!!

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By *rightonsteveMan over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

"I like Mr Marmites posts but smashing one out with him is just out of the question!!

I like his posts too but probably would

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Bought a Kong dog toy once for just this type of fun. They have different sizes. Google them, and then post back what size you think you could take.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

!BOOM!

It was only a matter of time before I tripped over this thread

May I assure the good people of the forums that:

I am non staining.

I do not cause recurring yeast based infections.

I am open to offers

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Oh and to answer the OP. I once had sex. With a real lady. And I didn't pay for it either. Kinky eh

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Is this a post where you are trying to lead us into a room for mutual masturbation Mr Marmite? It kinda sounds like the title of a TV show....like cooking with delia

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Husband fucked me with his very expensive, full replica light saber. It was the Darth Vader one. I went over to the dark side...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Is this a post where you are trying to lead us into a room for mutual masturbation Mr Marmite? It kinda sounds like the title of a TV show....like cooking with delia

Unfortunately I didn't think this one up. However if it proves to be a popular idea, I will steal it

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Is this a post where you are trying to lead us into a room for mutual masturbation Mr Marmite? It kinda sounds like the title of a TV show....like cooking with delia

Unfortunately I didn't think this one up. However if it proves to be a popular idea, I will steal it

Slapped a patent on it already so I'll be the winner if you do

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By *icked weaselCouple over a year ago

Near Edinburgh..

Never !! use a Flake..

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Never !! use a Flake..

I find Ripples better....more sturdy

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

In my teens, I once carefully removed a banana from its peel...

Im pretty sure most people peel their bananas"

Most throw the peel away..

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Is this a post where you are trying to lead us into a room for mutual masturbation Mr Marmite? It kinda sounds like the title of a TV show....like cooking with delia

Unfortunately I didn't think this one up. However if it proves to be a popular idea, I will steal it

Slapped a patent on it already so I'll be the winner if you do

How much will I get per show?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Is this a post where you are trying to lead us into a room for mutual masturbation Mr Marmite? It kinda sounds like the title of a TV show....like cooking with delia

Unfortunately I didn't think this one up. However if it proves to be a popular idea, I will steal it

Slapped a patent on it already so I'll be the winner if you do

How much will I get per show?"

Ermmmm you will get.....just doing the sums.....yes a grand total of!!!!

My respect and appreciation

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Sod it. I'm in. When do we start the auditions?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sod it. I'm in. When do we start the auditions?"

We could just nip into any directing room in chat and find a bunch of wankers to be fair

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Well I was hoping we would have a few ladies involved instead of just a sausage fest...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Well I was hoping we would have a few ladies involved instead of just a sausage fest...

There are ladies in their doing their little lady wanks too you know

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Well I was hoping we would have a few ladies involved instead of just a sausage fest...

There are ladies in their doing their little lady wanks too you know

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