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shame of some people

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

I am writing this with no other reason than I feel sorry for either one perso. or a group of people I haven't found out yet (and yes I will find you out) who have taken it upon themselves to save pictures of me from this site and have with no thought of consequence shown them to and had a bitch and slagging session about me being on here. they seem to not realise that to get my pics they have to be on here themselves or have created a false account just to gain access. I am neither shamed or embarrased by being on here and have met and found some good friends I am only angry that should the boot be on the other foot how they would feel as because of their actions and lack of thought or respect for the site I have taken the decision that I cannot return to work so unknowingly they have taken away someone's job

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

It's very sad that people can do this!. But as your post says your not ashamed to be here, so why can't you go back to work?. Makes me think you are ashamed otherwise you would go back head held high and say 'so it's my life nothing to do with anyone how I choose to spend my free time'. By not going to work they know it's upset and shamed you.

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By *ipswingCouple  over a year ago

portrush

that is horrendous.. i know it sounds hard but can you not face it out... giving up your job because of some twats... they just immature ... and not worth your attention... it is them that has lost respect not you...

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman  over a year ago

evesham

If you are not ashamed of being on here why are you not going back to work?

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By *rightonsteveMan  over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

I would keep the job if I were you. If you need it.

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By *nvictusMan  over a year ago

Beeston

Go back to work. Ignore it all and it will be old news that is forgotten in a few weeks.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

hold your head up high,theres nothing to be ashamed of for being on here,its your life to do with as you please,you only have the one chance to do so,so grap it and go into work,as though nothing has happened,if anyone says anything then you may find out who told folk,then you can return the favour by saying casually they are on here as well......

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By *icecouple561Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

Go back to work. You haven't done anything wrong. Don't let this person win.

Do you know who it is?

Sorry this has happened it must be horrible.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Have they got face pics of you then? Because your pics at the mo are very nice but not too revealing or identifiable.

So sorry someone thinks that this is a reasonable way to behave.

Front it out. I'd hate for you to give up your job because of some arsehole.

Loads of people are on dating sites and other sex sites. How's this any different in reality?

If you know who it is or have seen where the pictures have been posted surely you can take this to the police. They are finally waking up to this kind of thing and laws are being considered to tighten up in it do it's a hot topic.

Laugh it off at work. Prepare some cutting out downs. Remember; they're immature and most likely jealous of how great you look and that you're too hot for them.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

It isnt just the fact that people are talking about her, its also the lifestyle people think about when they here the word swinger. I for one was a little apprehensive when i joined and didnt show my pic for a long time. On a whole, unless you know what swinging is about, people tend to think it is seedy and wrong.

I would just go to work and get through it. Remember todays news is yesterdays chip wrappings x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Get your A into G girl. Put on those combat boots and go commando full into battle and fight those demons. Be proud of who you are. We all have private lives and you've experienced an infringement of yours. And what's more have a smile on your face. They're expecting a reaction. Choose your words wisely. However if you are able to, just smile at them and tell them you love them. They'll be pretty confused. There's a lot of ugly shit going down in their own lives to even conjure something like this up. Cape diem dahling xx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

They have an agenda with you to do that. Rise above it,smile at them and let them know it's not going to affect you

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By *imply_SensualMan  over a year ago

warrington

Do you suspect it is somebody from work? Obviously I don't what you do but if it is, have a quiet word with your boss, turn the tables that way.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Be true to who you are as a person and hold your head up ............. its your life your choice and I would not give my job up ........... if you do they win and what next you be brave and hold your grown ............. and that's being true to yourself . xx Hugs jo and yes had some of this my mums work mates found out and told her we was on here she was not happy but I told her how it was . xx

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By *isscheekychopsWoman  over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

Get your big girl pant on....keep your head held high your work can not do anything unless you have put them into disrepute. It's not crime of the century to be in fab

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By *icecouple561Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

I would be hiding my profile too.

How will the people at work know it's you from whats on here?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I think I'd be tempted to remove the profile. You have a couples one anyway so why leave the childish idiots proof and something to giggle over?

Hold your head up and talk to the police.

Best wishes. I'm sure most of us would be mortified if it happened to us but it's so much more acceptable to be on a sex site nowadays.

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By *dam_TinaCouple  over a year ago

Hampshire


" Remember todays news is yesterdays chip wrappings x"

Tomorrows...........

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Complete badness! Arseholes!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


" Remember todays news is yesterdays chip wrappings x

Tomorrows..........."

Nope read a copy of the mail in a cafe the other day, think you were right on the first comment

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Go to work. Be honest. Hold your head up. Everybody at my work knows what I do as I'm open and honest. I say to them. This is me and what !!!!! Smile cos your fantastic and not small minded. X try not to worry.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I wouldn't give your job up they are to hard to come across these days stick it out show the arse holes who have done this what a strong person you are and show no emotion they will soon get fed up if they have no reaction bullies are just weak narrow mined people who enjoy other peoples misery

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I had a similar thing happen, although they didn't go as far as to join and get photos.

It caused mayhem and they all had something to say and gossip about. They were meant to be good friends. lol.

Ironically, three out of the four of them were seeing married men behind the wife's back (one had a child to a married man) and the other was in a long term relationship with a man who wasn't exactly an upstanding citizen!

I wouldn't let anyone else decide what goes on in my life. Leave them to their sad little lives and you live yours the way you see fit.

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By *Ryan-Man  over a year ago

In Your Bush

Unfortunately that is the risk you take when you put face pictures in your public gallery like you did on your other profile.

Shit thing to happen, but that coupled with regular status updates draws attention from all of the people local to you.

It's already out there now - grit your teeth, hold your head high and say fuck em.

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By *ruitWoman  over a year ago

near kings lynn

Whatever choice of action you take I hope you come out the other side of this smiling. Remember you haven't done anything wrong xx

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By *ouple in LancashireCouple  over a year ago

in Lancashire

stand up to them and if you know whom they are then out them as cowards and bullies..

by leaving your job you are letting them win and they will only then pick on someone else..

stay strong..

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"If you are not ashamed of being on here why are you not going back to work?"

my thought exactly, strange post

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"If you are not ashamed of being on here why are you not going back to work?"

OP surely you should be speaking to your HR department as this is bullying and harassment

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Just own it. I'd rather be on a site like this where I can select somebody I want to sleep with, someone who you know is genuine and may have been verified and known by other users, someone you would have exchanged emails or telephone numbers with before meeting them, it's a bit safer than being pissed out of your head and going back to some random guys house that you've met in a club.

What you do in your private life is your business, I don't know what your profession is but as long as you don't mention where you work on here then you aren't bringing your company into disrepute.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"If you are not ashamed of being on here why are you not going back to work?

OP surely you should be speaking to your HR department as this is bullying and harassment"

I'd definitely be doing this. I'm pretty sure the person has also broken the law in some way.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


" Remember todays news is yesterdays chip wrappings x

Tomorrows..........."

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By *ngieandMrManCouple  over a year ago

hereford

Seems to me this says more about the low-life trying to cause you grief than it says about you.

If you read through the Term & Conditions for the website you should find something along the lines of '... all uploaded media is the property of fabswingers.com You must NOT download, copy, redistribute any content whatsoever...' or words to that effect.

Other than that just get some replies lined up...

"Oh, so your sex life is so boring you have to spy on mine to get you kicks?".

"What were YOU doing on a swingers website such that you THINK you spotted me?".

"Yeah, I've been on there some years, if fact I met your parents on there".

"Would you like my ebay username so you can look at the sex toys I've bought?"

Or simply "My private life is private... why are you spying on me?"

THEY are the SCUM... NOT YOU!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Backlash is an amazing organisation that gives advice and support to people that have been outed or persecuted for their private sex lives. I would recommend you visit their website and have a read of all the invaluable resources that are available there.

And, in my opinion, by not going back to work you are going to give people the idea that what you are doing is wrong. It isn't. Go back to work and if anyone tries to harass you, make notes and complain to your HR department.

crystal

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By *ancs MinxWoman  over a year ago

Burnley


"If you are not ashamed of being on here why are you not going back to work?"

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Similar thing has happened to us,an old friend who i fell out with said he was sent some pics of my wife from some one that knows us and said we are the talk of the town ,my reply was good just goes to show my sex life is better than all of yours,then he decided to show me the pics but wouldn't tell me who sent them,so i put it to him that hes on this site and im sure your wife will like to know your on it too haven't heard of him since

i out it down to jealousy as i know he would love to fuck my wife but hel never get a look in his last words was its disgusting,which made me laugh as this man pays for sex on a regular basis lol these ppls opinions have no standing in my life we do what we want

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Always the danger of face pic friday imho, just who are you sending your face to? A fabber? A colleague? A neighbour? A reporter?.....

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By *andm288Couple  over a year ago

oxford


"Backlash is an amazing organisation that gives advice and support to people that have been outed or persecuted for their private sex lives. I would recommend you visit their website and have a read of all the invaluable resources that are available there.

And, in my opinion, by not going back to work you are going to give people the idea that what you are doing is wrong. It isn't. Go back to work and if anyone tries to harass you, make notes and complain to your HR department.

crystal"

Couldn't agree more !

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

something similar happened to me, a 'friend' who knew we were on here, fell out with us, and she downloaded a disc of fotos which she gave to my boss, and also told my daughters and workmates that we were swingers... guess what.. none of them gave a damn as it didn't affect my work at all, and my daughters didn't care as long as we were together and happy. But blow me down... who should turn up on the site about a year later, all chummy and pally, but the very same bitch!! i blocked and ignored! Go back to your work, hold your head up, chances are nobody will care what you do in your own time xx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"something similar happened to me, a 'friend' who knew we were on here, fell out with us, and she downloaded a disc of fotos which she gave to my boss, and also told my daughters and workmates that we were swingers... guess what.. none of them gave a damn as it didn't affect my work at all, and my daughters didn't care as long as we were together and happy. But blow me down... who should turn up on the site about a year later, all chummy and pally, but the very same bitch!! i blocked and ignored! Go back to your work, hold your head up, chances are nobody will care what you do in your own time xx"

you should report them now surly fab would lick them off

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By *eggaeloverMan  over a year ago

Bristol

Politics. Its only recently we were throwing people into prison for being gay. I think its a lot to do with the prevailing religion, Christianity, but also patriarchy in general where women were seen as property.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Inform the police

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"something similar happened to me, a 'friend' who knew we were on here, fell out with us, and she downloaded a disc of fotos which she gave to my boss, and also told my daughters and workmates that we were swingers... guess what.. none of them gave a damn as it didn't affect my work at all, and my daughters didn't care as long as we were together and happy. But blow me down... who should turn up on the site about a year later, all chummy and pally, but the very same bitch!! i blocked and ignored! Go back to your work, hold your head up, chances are nobody will care what you do in your own time xx

you should report them now surly fab would lick them off "

she left when she got no reaction from me

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"something similar happened to me, a 'friend' who knew we were on here, fell out with us, and she downloaded a disc of fotos which she gave to my boss, and also told my daughters and workmates that we were swingers... guess what.. none of them gave a damn as it didn't affect my work at all, and my daughters didn't care as long as we were together and happy. But blow me down... who should turn up on the site about a year later, all chummy and pally, but the very same bitch!! i blocked and ignored! Go back to your work, hold your head up, chances are nobody will care what you do in your own time xx

you should report them now surly fab would lick them off

she left when she got no reaction from me"

no reaction is a good reaction iv found,i think the lad that did ours may have thought the wife was cheating that's the only thing i can think of why hed confront me about them then again i don't really care i made him delete the pics anyway and put out naughty pics in friends and private

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

If you can find out who, have the whacked

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By *iewMan  over a year ago
Forum Mod

Angus & Findhorn

are they likely to read this......

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

thank you for your messages it has helped to see other people's comments I for obvious reasons cannot say who I work for but it is very much a customer based face to face job and I hold a managerial level so I have lost my integrity to manage them and as much as it would be easy to hold my head high as some of my good friends who are colleagues have said its higher management than me that can make my life I living hell

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By *andybeachWoman  over a year ago

In the middle

Why on earth would you now down to bullies like that and give your job up, I would be saying "fuck you" with my head held high

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By *andybeachWoman  over a year ago

In the middle


"thank you for your messages it has helped to see other people's comments I for obvious reasons cannot say who I work for but it is very much a customer based face to face job and I hold a managerial level so I have lost my integrity to manage them and as much as it would be easy to hold my head high as some of my good friends who are colleagues have said its higher management than me that can make my life I living hell "

Honestly where I work we have had managers get up to all sorts of things and they brazen it out like the rest of us probably would.

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By *iewMan  over a year ago
Forum Mod

Angus & Findhorn

and I am not condoning what they did, it is shocking but why on earth if you hold a role that you would lose credibility if exposed, would you have public face pics.

apologies if they were in your private gallery.

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By *icecouple561Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex


"thank you for your messages it has helped to see other people's comments I for obvious reasons cannot say who I work for but it is very much a customer based face to face job and I hold a managerial level so I have lost my integrity to manage them and as much as it would be easy to hold my head high as some of my good friends who are colleagues have said its higher management than me that can make my life I living hell "

Have you resigned? How do you know that higher management will make your life a living hell?

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman  over a year ago

evesham


"thank you for your messages it has helped to see other people's comments I for obvious reasons cannot say who I work for but it is very much a customer based face to face job and I hold a managerial level so I have lost my integrity to manage them and as much as it would be easy to hold my head high as some of my good friends who are colleagues have said its higher management than me that can make my life I living hell "

I still don't get it. How have you lost integrity to manage them?

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By *icecouple561Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex


"thank you for your messages it has helped to see other people's comments I for obvious reasons cannot say who I work for but it is very much a customer based face to face job and I hold a managerial level so I have lost my integrity to manage them and as much as it would be easy to hold my head high as some of my good friends who are colleagues have said its higher management than me that can make my life I living hell

I still don't get it. How have you lost integrity to manage them? "

I'm struggling a bit here too unless there are huge chunks of information missing. Your authority as a professional should not be compromised by this unless you are clergy. I know that teachers etc need to be very careful too.

Without meaning to be harsh you just seem to have walked away from a good job because someone found out you're a swinger.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Just go back to work, if you feel like its a witch-hunt and it makes you panicky, find a good buddy to email for support.

Also, dress to kill (metaphorically speaking). Dressing to impress and looking immaculate, being an ice-maiden about it would be the ultimate revenge...

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