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What does everyone do for first social meet?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Just wondering what people do for first social meets? Coffee? Pub?
What has worked for you and any horrors gone wrong?"
always meet some where local and open. Pub cafe. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Only had one social.meet go bad
I met a guy for a drink with the same rule I meet everyone drink and chat first if we get on find a hotel if not we leave, anyway we net and I decided I didn't want to take things further but unknown to me he had took it upon himself to book a room before we met and when I said no thanks he wasn't happy and demanded I payed him back for the room  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Only had one social.meet go bad
I met a guy for a drink with the same rule I meet everyone drink and chat first if we get on find a hotel if not we leave, anyway we net and I decided I didn't want to take things further but unknown to me he had took it upon himself to book a room before we met and when I said no thanks he wasn't happy and demanded I payed him back for the room "
omg what dick |
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By *aura001 OP Woman
over a year ago
poole |
"Only had one social.meet go bad
I met a guy for a drink with the same rule I meet everyone drink and chat first if we get on find a hotel if not we leave, anyway we net and I decided I didn't want to take things further but unknown to me he had took it upon himself to book a room before we met and when I said no thanks he wasn't happy and demanded I payed him back for the room "
Complete dick...and clearly over confident |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Just be careful
I turned up to a social meet with a guy at a pub, to find him sat with half a dozen friends. When I asked what was going on, he said because he'd met me off a sex site I should be up for taking on him and his mates!
Keep it simple, a busy coffee shop  |
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By *aura001 OP Woman
over a year ago
poole |
"Just be careful
I turned up to a social meet with a guy at a pub, to find him sat with half a dozen friends. When I asked what was going on, he said because he'd met me off a sex site I should be up for taking on him and his mates!
Keep it simple, a busy coffee shop "
OMG!! That's shocking! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Just be careful
I turned up to a social meet with a guy at a pub, to find him sat with half a dozen friends. When I asked what was going on, he said because he'd met me off a sex site I should be up for taking on him and his mates!
Keep it simple, a busy coffee shop "
He knew you then  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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All our socials have been in pubs and we have never had any nightmares. We've had a couple of no shows but seeing as we're already in the pub we'll make an evening of it and enjoy each other's company. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've had good and bad experiences.
Firstly the good....(these have come from making mistakes in the past)
Now I take a lady or couple for dinner if I have built up a rapport through the phone or through messages and we all have time. This is usually on the understanding that if we all get on...we take it further..if not we can all walk away...it's easier and no pressure.
If time is limited...then I stick to a decent cocktail lounge again parameters are agreed - is it strictly social of who knows.
I always stay in a hotel and have no expectation of anyone coming back..but it's there should I need it ( I tend to stay there the night I am meeting regardless)
I find this works great for me. No expectation and if all goes well then who knows.
Now for the bad...
My worst experience of things going bad....I was 26..was my 3rd social meet..(the other two had gone well) This social meet was with a single lady who I had never met before...
I was staying in London @ a very very nice hotel, it's very very well known and they also know myself & my family in a professional capacity.
I was there due to work and one evening I was feeling..."in the need of company" I got chatting to a lady from another swinging site and we arranged a meet. I did brief her that please please be discreet, as this is not the type of establishment that rents rooms by the hour.
45 mins later...I get a call..she is down stairs....oh dear god!!!
As I approached her in the lobby I could smell the alcohol..she was clearly intoxicated and starting to have lapses in capacity...needless to say I got some very very interesting looks.
Up to the room and at this time..I was thinking..you must be kidding me dear lady if you think I am even going to lay a hand on you....very very sticky situation to be in..considering the next morning my father was arriving @ the hotel!
She decided to clean out 2 thirds of the contents of the mini bar during her brief stay....I then rang reception...order a mini cab.
Got her down stairs...paid the cabbie a stupid amount of money to take her home safe and get rid!
Never ever again...a lesson well I do not wish to repeat! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Just be careful
I turned up to a social meet with a guy at a pub, to find him sat with half a dozen friends. When I asked what was going on, he said because he'd met me off a sex site I should be up for taking on him and his mates!
Keep it simple, a busy coffee shop
He knew you then "
Oi cheeky, you'l be going over my knee |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I prefer a social to be just that. Not see how things go then move on somewhere private after. It doesn't bother me someone saying no thanks to my face but I don't like doing it myself. For that reason a social is only a drink or coffee shop |
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"..... She decided to clean out 2 thirds of the contents of the mini bar during her brief stay.... "
 Those mini-bars are ridiculously expensive
I met this guy in the bar. We talked and he asked if I liked him. Said yes. Asked if he should book a room. Said yes
We go to reception. He puts his credit card in the machine and walks back to me and says, "you won't let me down, will you?". I replied that as long as he wasn't into anything really kinky, I will go along with it
We go up to the room. Spend some time just relaxing. Then he starts undressing me. Half way through sex, 'mid-stroke', he says "I have to tell you that I am in a relationship" and looks at me straight in the eyes. I didn't know what to say so I said, congratulations"  |
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By *adybee77Woman
over a year ago
MAMOBA, miles and miles of bugger all (Aberdeenshire) |
Usually meet in a pub or for a coffee. Have been for dinner a few times, but it felt a bit too much like a date for me.
The good - time has passed quickly, wonderfully with loads of laughs and giggles in good company.
The bad - went on a pubcrawl (his choice) after meeting in a pub in front of all of his mates (again his choice of venue) he got d*unk and as I was sober and driving, demanded I took him home to save him a taxi fare! Lesson learned, choose venue myself! lol |
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"I prefer a social to be just that. Not see how things go then move on somewhere private after. It doesn't bother me someone saying no thanks to my face but I don't like doing it myself. For that reason a social is only a drink or coffee shop"
Ms Cake I like your attitude. You always say exactly how things are with you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Always a busy coffee shop, I drive myself there so no alcohol. always arrange another time to meet for fun, never there and then. Gives either of us the option to walk away and decide yes or no to meeting again. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"..... She decided to clean out 2 thirds of the contents of the mini bar during her brief stay....
Those mini-bars are ridiculously expensive
I met this guy in the bar. We talked and he asked if I liked him. Said yes. Asked if he should book a room. Said yes
We go to reception. He puts his credit card in the machine and walks back to me and says, "you won't let me down, will you?". I replied that as long as he wasn't into anything really kinky, I will go along with it
We go up to the room. Spend some time just relaxing. Then he starts undressing me. Half way through sex, 'mid-stroke', he says "I have to tell you that I am in a relationship" and looks at me straight in the eyes. I didn't know what to say so I said, congratulations" "
Hahahahahaha...Love it!! This made me laugh...I get your point though...what on earth are you supposed to say lol.!!!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'll only do anal on a social meet. Definitely no oral.
It's so much easier to disguise in Starbucks "
Not if they know you, like they do me
I'm sure a couple of them are on this site! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I prefer a social to be just that. Not see how things go then move on somewhere private after. It doesn't bother me someone saying no thanks to my face but I don't like doing it myself. For that reason a social is only a drink or coffee shop
Ms Cake I like your attitude. You always say exactly how things are with you "
I can't be any other way |
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"I prefer a social to be just that. Not see how things go then move on somewhere private after. It doesn't bother me someone saying no thanks to my face but I don't like doing it myself. For that reason a social is only a drink or coffee shop
Ms Cake I like your attitude. You always say exactly how things are with you
I can't be any other way "
Nor us but its surprising how difficult it is for some people |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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And,I prefer a quieter place where you can talk openly and not be worried about being overheard. I had a social meet in Homebase once. He needed a new light fitting. We had a nice cup of tea and a chat after |
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By *aura001 OP Woman
over a year ago
poole |
"..... She decided to clean out 2 thirds of the contents of the mini bar during her brief stay....
Those mini-bars are ridiculously expensive
I met this guy in the bar. We talked and he asked if I liked him. Said yes. Asked if he should book a room. Said yes
We go to reception. He puts his credit card in the machine and walks back to me and says, "you won't let me down, will you?". I replied that as long as he wasn't into anything really kinky, I will go along with it
We go up to the room. Spend some time just relaxing. Then he starts undressing me. Half way through sex, 'mid-stroke', he says "I have to tell you that I am in a relationship" and looks at me straight in the eyes. I didn't know what to say so I said, congratulations" "
Ha ha ha loved this one! Come on then...did you finish the job?? LOL |
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"I'll only do anal on a social meet. Definitely no oral.
It's so much easier to disguise in Starbucks "
I think they award double reward points on anal only, as you're obviously not consuming liquids that aren't produced by a barista -unless they're doing the drilling. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'll only do anal on a social meet. Definitely no oral.
It's so much easier to disguise in Starbucks
I think they award double reward points on anal only, as you're obviously not consuming liquids that aren't produced by a barista -unless they're doing the drilling."
Between 2pm - 4pm only! - Happy Hour! |
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"I'll only do anal on a social meet. Definitely no oral.
It's so much easier to disguise in Starbucks
I think they award double reward points on anal only, as you're obviously not consuming liquids that aren't produced by a barista -unless they're doing the drilling."
I must remember to carry my card |
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"... Ha ha ha loved this one! Come on then...did you finish the job?? LOL "
He finished the 'job' . And then took a shower, presumably to get every trace of perfume off
Then got worried about returning the key-card at reception as we'd only been in the room for 2-3 hours. He said that the reception staff would become suspicious and they have his credit card details. He was so paranoid. He returned the next morning to drop the key-card back (or so told me that he would do that)
I was like watching a bad movie. I couldn't get away fast enough. Best part is that he has asked to see me again. I guess, this time, 'mid-stroke' I will be told about how many children he has |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"... Ha ha ha loved this one! Come on then...did you finish the job?? LOL
He finished the 'job' . And then took a shower, presumably to get every trace of perfume off
Then got worried about returning the key-card at reception as we'd only been in the room for 2-3 hours. He said that the reception staff would become suspicious and they have his credit card details. He was so paranoid. He returned the next morning to drop the key-card back (or so told me that he would do that)
I was like watching a bad movie. I couldn't get away fast enough. Best part is that he has asked to see me again. I guess, this time, 'mid-stroke' I will be told about how many children he has "
Paranoid about returning the key card??
It's a bloody hotel!!..They do what you tell them LOL..
Sounds like he was having a moment of reflection and the guilt was kicking in!! |
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Choose a venue that is neither going to be deathly quiet nor packed out. You blend in but don't get to be a focal point for others. Maybe select it when you arrive early, so it's not full of his crowd.
Be 100% clear upfront on the rules to manage expectations and stick to them.
I like Starbucks but go for your own tastes. Some prefer venue quite a way from their homes and towns for discretion.
Don't put yourself at risk by using places that mean you can't slip away and remain safe at all times.
Or meet at a club when you'd probably be going.
Always speak on the phone first and make sure they confirm closer to the time. Aim to split costs so it's fair and unpressured.
If in doubt let a friend be your emergency contact or support. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've had social drinks and yes, dinners if we've had time. Key for me is no expectations. I want to know who I'm going to connect with sexually and feel a vibe. That's me. |
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"...
Paranoid about returning the key card??
It's a bloody hotel!!..They do what you tell them LOL..
Sounds like he was having a moment of reflection and the guilt was kicking in!!"
From my experience, cheats feel no such guilt. Which is probably one of the reasons I meet them. I don't feel any guilt then just dumping them and walking away without any explanation
I know the moral police here will rip me apart but I am honest about what I do. However, I always insist on being told their first name, even if it is a fake one |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"...
Paranoid about returning the key card??
It's a bloody hotel!!..They do what you tell them LOL..
Sounds like he was having a moment of reflection and the guilt was kicking in!!
From my experience, cheats feel no such guilt. Which is probably one of the reasons I meet them. I don't feel any guilt then just dumping them and walking away without any explanation
I know the moral police here will rip me apart but I am honest about what I do. However, I always insist on being told their first name, even if it is a fake one "
Is that for when you have the urge to scream a name out, you make sure it's the right one haha
You sound like a right giggle |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"...
Paranoid about returning the key card??
It's a bloody hotel!!..They do what you tell them LOL..
Sounds like he was having a moment of reflection and the guilt was kicking in!!
From my experience, cheats feel no such guilt. Which is probably one of the reasons I meet them. I don't feel any guilt then just dumping them and walking away without any explanation
I know the moral police here will rip me apart but I am honest about what I do. However, I always insist on being told their first name, even if it is a fake one "
I like married women as well, the sneaky sex is the thrill of it  |
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"...
Paranoid about returning the key card??
It's a bloody hotel!!..They do what you tell them LOL..
Sounds like he was having a moment of reflection and the guilt was kicking in!!
From my experience, cheats feel no such guilt. Which is probably one of the reasons I meet them. I don't feel any guilt then just dumping them and walking away without any explanation
I know the moral police here will rip me apart but I am honest about what I do. However, I always insist on being told their first name, even if it is a fake one "
I don't really care how or who you meet and your reasons for doing so but I'm getting slightly tired of people telling us what their moral stand point is yet calling those with a different view.point "the moral police" . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Pub or coffee shop.
If I like her then I make arrangements to follow her home and wear her skin...
...sorry I mean arrange a time to play.  "
so wrong yet so so funny |
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"...
I don't really care how or who you meet and your reasons for doing so but I'm getting slightly tired of people telling us what their moral stand point is yet calling those with a different view.point "the moral police" . "
I am not telling YOU anything. I am only telling THOSE who have been telling me about my lack of morals
On a swingers site, I find that somewhat hypocritical as THOSE same people (not YOU) are hiding their 'lifestyle' from their families, friends, employers, etc.
Please don't spoil for an argument with me. I don't even know YOU
xxx |
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"...
I don't really care how or who you meet and your reasons for doing so but I'm getting slightly tired of people telling us what their moral stand point is yet calling those with a different view.point "the moral police" .
I am not telling YOU anything. I am only telling THOSE who have been telling me about my lack of morals
On a swingers site, I find that somewhat hypocritical as THOSE same people (not YOU) are hiding their 'lifestyle' from their families, friends, employers, etc.
Please don't spoil for an argument with me. I don't even know YOU
xxx"
I'm not spoiling for an argument, I don't know you either. I was just putting my views forward on what you'd said. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"...... I like married women as well, the sneaky sex is the thrill of it
When I get married, I'll be sure to drop you a line
Just kidding, just kidding"
lol if u change ur mind as ur hubby is working or down the pub when married, hola at me  |
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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago
Titz Towers, North Notts |
Friendly pub or a TG event. Whilst there, I tell bad jokes, make weak puns and eventually explain I'm on a night out with friends, so won't be giving them a BJ in their car in the car park |
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Busy coffee shop in a local shopping centre. The staff couldn't care less if I'm there repeatedly in quick succession with a variety of men, the parking is free and plentiful, it's a busy anonymous place where I can make a quick getaway if it goes awry or we can linger if we're getting on, I can approach from upstairs to see if he's there and like his pics and if I get a no show I can go round the shops and won't look like I've been stood up. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"..... She decided to clean out 2 thirds of the contents of the mini bar during her brief stay....
Those mini-bars are ridiculously expensive
I met this guy in the bar. We talked and he asked if I liked him. Said yes. Asked if he should book a room. Said yes
We go to reception. He puts his credit card in the machine and walks back to me and says, "you won't let me down, will you?". I replied that as long as he wasn't into anything really kinky, I will go along with it
We go up to the room. Spend some time just relaxing. Then he starts undressing me. Half way through sex, 'mid-stroke', he says "I have to tell you that I am in a relationship" and looks at me straight in the eyes. I didn't know what to say so I said, congratulations" "
He sounds lovely. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"...
Paranoid about returning the key card??
It's a bloody hotel!!..They do what you tell them LOL..
Sounds like he was having a moment eflection and the guilt was kicking in!!"
I know a Travelodge receptionist and trust me, they have seen it all and don't give a monkey's. In fact they play 'spot the shaggers' on a regular basis to pass the time! |
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"Just wondering what people do for first social meets? Coffee? Pub?
What has worked for you and any horrors gone wrong?"
Daytime: coffee
Evening: pub
Only horror: bloke didn't hold the door open for me or buy a drink saying it wasn't a date...I didn't stay. |
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I did arrange to meet someone in a city centre pub once despite the fact that I really didn't want to meet there. It's a pub I had never been in and I prefer first meets to be alcohol free.
Anyway, I got there and it was fairly quiet. I got a drink cos he didn't appear to be there and sat down. While I waited I checked out the forums, sent a couple of texts and played some patience on my phone.
When I finished my drink and he still wasn't there I'd had enough of being the only single female sat in a strange pub getting curious looks from the regulars so I left. I was just pulling away when this guy started hammering on the car window. I cracked it a little (and hit the central locking) only to find that it was my meet, he'd arrived not long after me but instead of introducing himself he got a drink at the bar and watched me!
Needless to say I left, blocked him and have returned to my habit of meeting in coffee shops. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I had a social meet in a very busy London pub. We were getting along fine but all the time I was distracted by a man behind him who kept looking at me and smiling. It was hard not to look and very rude of me. I felt better though when my meet said he couldn't actually accommodate and should we look for a quiet alley somewhere for me to give him a blow job. You couldn't make it up |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Used to just go for coffee meet. (Prefer costa) but my play time is so limited now I just stick to clubs. Will put a meet up. If people wanna meet great.I won't change my plans for anyone. If people turn up and we click game on. If not then I usually find someone that peaks my interest. I must add tho this approach may backfire on me one day. (If all the men who say they will be in such a club at such a time turned up I'd have to be a greedy girl for the night) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I had a social meet in a very busy London pub. We were getting along fine but all the time I was distracted by a man behind him who kept looking at me and smiling. It was hard not to look and very rude of me. I felt better though when my meet said he couldn't actually accommodate and should we look for a quiet alley somewhere for me to give him a blow job. You couldn't make it up "
I'd have said ok that'll be £200 see what he said to that then said we'll of your going to to treat me like a hooked your paying me like one, I bet the alley way wouldn't have looked so inviting for him then |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I had a social meet in a very busy London pub. We were getting along fine but all the time I was distracted by a man behind him who kept looking at me and smiling. It was hard not to look and very rude of me. I felt better though when my meet said he couldn't actually accommodate and should we look for a quiet alley somewhere for me to give him a blow job. You couldn't make it up
I'd have said ok that'll be £200 see what he said to that then said we'll of your going to to treat me like a hooked your paying me like one, I bet the alley way wouldn't have looked so inviting for him then "
Very tempting. I just walked to the station with him and jumped on a train to another meet. A sex one and stayed overnight. Well, I was already half way there being in London |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I met a guy for a drink in a pub who spent the whole time texting another women off the site who he was meeting the following week, his who topic of conversation was telling me about her and reading me her saucy text, he then got up and asked me to excuse him while he went outside to call her up, needless to say when he returned I was not there waiting for him |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I met a guy for a drink in a pub who spent the whole time texting another women off the site who he was meeting the following week, his who topic of conversation was telling me about her and reading me her saucy text, he then got up and asked me to excuse him while he went outside to call her up, needless to say when he returned I was not there waiting for him "
So nice to feel wanted lol I only check in with my daughter on a meet and if I can't do it in private I tell the man what I'm doing |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My experience is limited on here and another well known swinging site.
First couple I met (multiple times) to just watch was in their own home. Built up a good email and telephone rapport first but the very first time I met them face to face, they were naked within 10 minutes in their own bedroom.
The handful of other meets I've had I've arranged a no-strings social drink first with an assumption that either party can leave if it's not working, but I also have a nearby hotel room booked "just in case". So far we've always ended up back in the room
Most recent meet was also in a pub / restaurant for a flirty social. |
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"...
I know a Travelodge receptionist and trust me, they have seen it all and don't give a monkey's. In fact they play 'spot the shaggers' on a regular basis to pass the time!"
How often have you been spotted, then? |
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