FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Male behaviour after being rejected!
Male behaviour after being rejected!
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Through speaking to different ladies on this site and others, I have realised that alot of guys out there don't react well to rejection, I have been rejected many times in the past myself and respected that persons wishes, we all have different likes and dislikes so we are not all suited, but what i don't understand is how some guys get so offended by this!! they send awful abussive messages to the person that rejected them!! It must be something to do with the male ego some must have really sensitive ones!! or maybe some are just deluded narcissists. just wondered what peoples _iews are on this subject?? |
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The rejection seems to cut deeper here than say out on the town ,chat a bird up and she says fuck off and you move on .
The site gives the impression that a massage or two means that one part of the party assumes that sex is on the menu . When the other party says no thanks , they take it as a rule quite personally and toys are rapidly displaced from the pram |
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"The rejection seems to cut deeper here than say out on the town ,chat a bird up and she says fuck off and you move on .
The site gives the impression that a message or two means that one part of the party assumes that sex is on the menu . When the other party says no thanks , they take it as a rule quite personally and toys are rapidly displaced from the pram "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If ive ever been rejected by a lady or couple my standard reply is at least a Thankyou and hope you find what your looking for...no need to abuse...so ladies. And couples message me and I will provide an example  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Childish, throwing rattles, and 5 minutes before you was a stunning fuck piece.
5 minutes later your a fat slag, and reckon they are doing you a favour.
Simples, err no your not doing me a favour lol
Her |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Only had the abusive messages off men and not couples or ladies. Always a fat ugly slag when I turn somebody down.  "
I've had a few abusive comments also on my single profile after a polite no thanks. Funny how you can go from gorgeous to a fat cow in the space of one message!! Sad how immature some can be but at least they've confirmed your decision to not want to meet them as the correct one. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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yes, the same...only from single men..always reply politely to all messages..even married men in the outer hebrides, and im always suprised when i get a nasty message back..seems a huge waste of effort...had 5 increasingly horrible messages off a guy last night....strangley, a long while ago, the same guy messaged me on a 'fishing' site, and behaved exactly the same...spent the best part of an evening sending me really nasty messages...he actually worries me, sounds like a bit of a psycho!
it just reaffirms my original decision! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have had abusive messeges from couples too when i have said "no thanks" to them, it's annoying cus we have carefully said what we are looking for on our profiles and adverts so when someone who is the complete opposite messeges us and then is abusive cus we have said no its idiotic and won't make us meet them lol
I have been called all sorts when i have said no thanks to them ..... slag, timewaster, far cow, ugly bitch etc  blocking is such fun lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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didnt block the guy last night..wanted to see how long he'd go on...went from'i love curvy women'..to 'youre a fucking walrus!'...'walrus'??? thats a new one!..after the 5th message i went reply,only to find he'd blocked me...and not a single word was spelt correctly! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Childish, throwing rattles, and 5 minutes before you was a stunning fuck piece.
5 minutes later your a fat slag, and reckon they are doing you a favour.
Simples, err no your not doing me a favour lolThis is based on a single female profile, not this site another
Her
Her"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Some men are so full of themselves that they think that every woman would be so grateful to be asked that any rejection is taken as a personal insult and they have problems reconciling it with their overinflated _iew of themselves. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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most guys are never the same after I reject them,,most go down hill rapidly,some lose their jobs most just cant cope with life.
One guy joined the foreign legion.
Its sad,,but hey lifes a bitch eh  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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What many can't get through their thick skulls is that it's all about choice. Rejection doesn't actually exist it's about fancying someone(s) and if they're compatible sexually.
If someone does not share my interests, I would not even wink at them or waste my time sending a message.
Everyone should just block and delete unsuitable messages, then no abuse simple.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"most guys are never the same after I reject them,,most go down hill rapidly,some lose their jobs most just cant cope with life.
One guy joined the foreign legion.
Its sad,,but hey lifes a bitch eh "
Well I just say no thanks and that's it . lol I have not one on my block list here for being nasty I must be lucky . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"yes, the same...only from single men..always reply politely to all messages..even married men in the outer hebrides, and im always suprised when i get a nasty message back..seems a huge waste of effort...had 5 increasingly horrible messages off a guy last night....strangley, a long while ago, the same guy messaged me on a 'fishing' site, and behaved exactly the same...spent the best part of an evening sending me really nasty messages...he actually worries me, sounds like a bit of a psycho!
it just reaffirms my original decision!"
Yes, you had a lucky escape... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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One man messaged back quite a psycho message saying he knows me knows where I live and knows my friends and I better watch my back. Woohhhhh and I'm supposed to be intimidated mmmm |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"Through speaking to different ladies on this site and others, I have realised that alot of guys out there don't react well to rejection, I have been rejected many times in the past myself and respected that persons wishes, we all have different likes and dislikes so we are not all suited, but what i don't understand is how some guys get so offended by this!! they send awful abussive messages to the person that rejected them!! It must be something to do with the male ego some must have really sensitive ones!! or maybe some are just deluded narcissists. just wondered what peoples _iews are on this subject??"
my _iew is that you should see some of my mail when i have said "no thank you!" to some single women and couples....
being that much of an "arse" and no taking rejection well is not the sole domain of one group of people..... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"most guys are never the same after I reject them,,most go down hill rapidly,some lose their jobs most just cant cope with life.
One guy joined the foreign legion.
Its sad,,but hey lifes a bitch eh Well I just say no thanks and that's it . lol I have not one on my block list here for being nasty I must be lucky . "
yea I just say no thanks too,,but the poor guys cant cope,,its sooooo sad |
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Really stumps me that people can be so disrespectful of another's choice.
I am regularly rejected and completely understand why. They looked and didnt like me.
They are wrong of course, but aren't to know that at the time |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's simple the men that send nasty shit are just so numb by rejection they react like we are all in there imagination. I just don't reply to anyone that's not my type end of init xx |
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I always reply to them after their rejection wishing them all the best, offering to do any housework for them or small jobs around the house or garden, maybe help them with the weekly shop or even babysit for them too.
I'll even offer to lend them some money along with 'Ahhh just pay me back when you get it'.
No I fucking don't. Neither do I kiss arse's or look for brownie points  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I used to work for a domestic violence help center. We would never ever tell anyone to leave their partner, as most people would expect. The reason being, is that women are at their most vulnerable when they leave their abuser. You are most likely to be attacked when you reject them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"so do females and couples. 
some people just don't take rejection well, others are rude in the manner in which they reject."
If a person says "fuck off you ugly twat", chances are they will get abuse back. Then they start an indignant thread about it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I used to work for a domestic violence help center. We would never ever tell anyone to leave their partner, as most people would expect. The reason being, is that women are at their most vulnerable when they leave their abuser. You are most likely to be attacked when you reject them."
 xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I never have an issue with rejection.
Sometimes I visit the shallow graves of those who did reject me and I even still chat to them...."
Backing away slowly. Not making eye contact ...........
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've turned people down a few times and I couple say the same for some women.
Mind you I believe in being polite and usually they realise how stupid they have been.
Unless they are total philistines and just go off on one.
I also have experienced rejection, my thoughts are if you don't experience it, how will you ever apperciate being liked
Manners cost nothing yet get you everything. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I personally feel that after being rejected, it's a weight off my own shoulder.
The uncertainty is the hazy grey area which I'm not a fan of (just my personality, I guess_). Once I have that answer, everything becomes so much easier - be it a willing acceptance, or rejection as you say!
I probably load a bigger weight on a question like that than need be - but it gets easier with age. As you can tell, still young, haha. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I got my first abusive message last night off of a new member (I've been in around 3-months). His reason Because I never answered his message quickly enough after reading his message and checking his profile..
His vitriolic language was second to none and did take me by surprise.. But a quick block from me and a report to admin and I forgot about it.. sad man that he is.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've had my best today. I politely said no and he replied
"Well I wouldn't want to f**k you anyway. You look like a walking STI"
I would add that 99% of guys are polite though. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've had my best today. I politely said no and he replied
"Well I wouldn't want to f**k you anyway. You look like a walking STI"
I would add that 99% of guys are polite though. "
What the hell does a walking STI look like?? lol. I'm not sure they realise how much of a twat they make themselves look with such abuse. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Haha no idea!!
I liked the "I didn't want to f**k you anyway" bit. I thought that's exactly what he wanted!"
That just gave me an idea. We could get someone to dress up as a Petri Dish and say look...A walking STI...great sexual health promotion that |
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By *B9 QueenWoman
over a year ago
Over the rainbow, under the bridge |
"so do females and couples.
some people just don't take rejection well, others are rude in the manner in which they reject.
If a person says "fuck off you ugly twat", chances are they will get abuse back. Then they start an indignant thread about it."
The key is how you respond. If I'm in the mood I can send quite a lengthy, but scathing, put down. Just for fun.
But most of the time I can't be arsed. I just block and move on. |
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"I've had my best today. I politely said no and he replied
"Well I wouldn't want to f**k you anyway. You look like a walking STI"
I would add that 99% of guys are polite though. "
. What did he ask for in his initial message if his opinion changed so quickly. |
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"Through speaking to different ladies on this site and others, I have realised that alot of guys out there don't react well to rejection, I have been rejected many times in the past myself and respected that persons wishes, we all have different likes and dislikes so we are not all suited, but what i don't understand is how some guys get so offended by this!! they send awful abussive messages to the person that rejected them!! It must be something to do with the male ego some must have really sensitive ones!! or maybe some are just deluded narcissists. just wondered what peoples _iews are on this subject??"
I think this is one of those 'look how nice I am' type threads.
After all... it's a small minority of guys who take rejection badly and in comparison to the wrath some women unleash, a short "fat slag" message is nothing in comparison.
If women in general were so great at taking a knock-back, more of them would quit whinging about what guys aren't doing right in messages and start taking the initiative. |
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By *iewMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Angus & Findhorn |
"
If women in general were so great at taking a knock-back, more of them would quit whinging about what guys aren't doing right in messages and start taking the initiative. "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've had my best today. I politely said no and he replied
"Well I wouldn't want to f**k you anyway. You look like a walking STI"
I would add that 99% of guys are polite though. . What did he ask for in his initial message if his opinion changed so quickly."
Just would I like to meet him at his hotel Friday night. I assumed it was for more than a game of scrabble but I might have been wrong. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Too many "single" (I use the word advisedly) men on this site think that all the ladies are just looking for a quick fuck.
They think it is a sex site....no concept whatsoever of the lifestyle involved in swinging.
If they get enough rejections then eventually they will all sod off....lol! |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"Through speaking to different ladies on this site and others, I have realised that alot of guys out there don't react well to rejection, I have been rejected many times in the past myself and respected that persons wishes, we all have different likes and dislikes so we are not all suited, but what i don't understand is how some guys get so offended by this!! they send awful abussive messages to the person that rejected them!! It must be something to do with the male ego some must have really sensitive ones!! or maybe some are just deluded narcissists. just wondered what peoples _iews are on this subject??
I think this is one of those 'look how nice I am' type threads."
I was thinking the same thing. Pro-active white knighting! |
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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago
dirtybigbadsgirlville |
"Through speaking to different ladies on this site and others, I have realised that alot of guys out there don't react well to rejection, I have been rejected many times in the past myself and respected that persons wishes, we all have different likes and dislikes so we are not all suited, but what i don't understand is how some guys get so offended by this!! they send awful abussive messages to the person that rejected them!! It must be something to do with the male ego some must have really sensitive ones!! or maybe some are just deluded narcissists. just wondered what peoples _iews are on this subject??"
What a crock of shit. This is sooo not gender specific, I have male friends who have had to seek legal advice after rejecting a woman.OP ten outta ten for being condescending though.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Its quite a relief to hear it happens to others. ..I was beginning to think it was just me after hearing from a male on hear that there was a few men in the forum slagging me off saying I dont meet ( read my veris and some have gone) im a bloke in drag..if I do meet I make em pay for the hotel ( iv never had a hotel meet unless I was away with my company n they pay) and its for my pleasure only (as I get off on being a giver I find that odd) one of the men wanted to eat a kit kat outta my arse a few days previous. ..im still friends with most I have met....its just bitchy n childish x lou x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"didnt block the guy last night..wanted to see how long he'd go on...went from'i love curvy women'..to 'youre a fucking walrus!'...'walrus'??? thats a new one!..after the 5th message i went reply,only to find he'd blocked me...and not a single word was spelt correctly!"
Yeah I know the feeling and these guys I would not touch with a stray cat it's my choice some good some bad men and dummy's ha ha |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Look - some people are twats and some people are not. Some are twats some of the time and some of the time they aren't twats.
Twattery is gender neutral. "
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"I never have an issue with rejection.
Sometimes I visit the shallow graves of those who did reject me and I even still chat to them....
Backing away slowly. Not making eye contact ...........
"
Hello.... you're not leaving me are you?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The thing that shocks me more than anything is the difference between these peoples behaviour and the feeling behind the swinging concept. I believe this to be social and sexual friendship and respect, if someone is behaving outside of that then surely theyre not welcome in anyway and should be barred. This is a swinging site, not a sex site |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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A significant amount of men, in particular, seem to see this site as a last resort to not just meeting women but having sex with anyone that will have them. As such they really do see this as the bargain basement of possible partners.I honestly don't think they will ever understand about what other peoples motivationsvare for being on this site. If they can't be polite and respectful to people that are a lot more understanding and unshocked at their blatant attempt to get sex, just imagine how they must fail miserably to meet women in real life. They must never pay for a drink with the amount that get thrown in their faces. Probably. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"most guys are never the same after I reject them,,most go down hill rapidly,some lose their jobs most just cant cope with life.
One guy joined the foreign legion.
Its sad,,but hey lifes a bitch eh "
im slowly getting over it now |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Only had the abusive messages off men and not couples or ladies. Always a fat ugly slag when I turn somebody down. "
It is amusing as how one minute your the sexiest womam on Fab then all of a sudden an ugly slag! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We had one the other day. He offered us a meet which we politely decline with a " Thanks for the offer but I'm afraid you aren't my type" to which he replied " Your type? You suck random cocks so everyone is your type" lol |
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By *adybee77Woman
over a year ago
MAMOBA, miles and miles of bugger all (Aberdeenshire) |
I've had some absolute crackers - from singles of both sexes, and couples too.
Been told I'd be a moped shag (fun as long as his mates never knew)
That I obviously have no standards being on here, and am too ugly to make a living as a prostitute (yeah because they are all Julia Roberts look alikeys!)
Been called fat, ugly (they'd never seen my face) a timewaster, and a fake.
The couple one was fantastic tho - they told me it didn't matter what I wanted out of a meet, as I am just on here because I can't get a man of my own so should be grateful for anything offered, and just accept it. I obviously dropped everything and rushed to meet them... |
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I am the same. I get rejected a few times and I reply by thanking them for replying and saying I hope they have fun. No need to stamp my feet and get all abusive as it's not gonna change the persons mind.
I had someone who just joined call me a ugly old man when I wasn't interested. It made me laugh as I know a few people on here who wouldn't think I'm ugly. Old? Hey, I'm in my naughty forties, lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You should see the reaction from girls that I turn down!
They are sooooo used to clicking their fingers and having the pick of the bunch youd think you have just shot their offspring in the head when you try and say no!  |
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By *iewMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Angus & Findhorn |
"You should see the reaction from girls that I turn down!
They are sooooo used to clicking their fingers and having the pick of the bunch youd think you have just shot their offspring in the head when you try and say no! "
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