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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I've been on fab for almost 4 years. I like to keep a low profile. I dip in and out , like most people, I'm sure. I bring this up to underline that I'm not a naive novice.
I've met a few couples socially, and sexually. Now, due to always wanting to be sure that the couple is secure in their relationship, I rarely play with couples (the last time was over a year ago).
I tend not to speak to one half of the couple more than the other unless the other has specified this is okay. I am very respectful of boundaries and very much aware of situations. I rarely message someone unless messaged first.
Now, my rant is.... why, oh why, do couples "swing" and say they both play, love meeting men and women and both have permission to play with others, when all the verifications are of the female meeting single males. And if the male speaks to another female (once, for a few days or months) does the female suddenly throw in the jealousy towel. (Yes I know this happens with men too, but there's far to much men bashing on here already)
Personally, I don't see the point of being in a relationship and swinging unless you're both aware of what both of you want, and understand each other's emotions.
I am ready for a torrent of abuse now  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You've probably just pointed out a few truths that people might not be comfortable with.
It's why I try to be honest on my profile regardless of who might judge me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've been on fab for almost 4 years. I like to keep a low profile. I dip in and out , like most people, I'm sure. I bring this up to underline that I'm not a naive novice.
I've met a few couples socially, and sexually. Now, due to always wanting to be sure that the couple is secure in their relationship, I rarely play with couples (the last time was over a year ago).
I tend not to speak to one half of the couple more than the other unless the other has specified this is okay. I am very respectful of boundaries and very much aware of situations. I rarely message someone unless messaged first.
Now, my rant is.... why, oh why, do couples "swing" and say they both play, love meeting men and women and both have permission to play with others, when all the verifications are of the female meeting single males. And if the male speaks to another female (once, for a few days or months) does the female suddenly throw in the jealousy towel. (Yes I know this happens with men too, but there's far to much men bashing on here already)
Personally, I don't see the point of being in a relationship and swinging unless you're both aware of what both of you want, and understand each other's emotions.
I am ready for a torrent of abuse now "
We can't speak for all couples, but we only swing as a couple and don't meet separately, so we both know what the other is doing as we do it together, I'm guessing the female half of the couple didn't know her OH was messaging?
Which is an issue that they need to sort out, it may not be a jealousy issue if one didn't know what the other one was doing, if that makes sense |
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I don't see the point of being in a relationship at all unless you are aware if what the other wants and there are no jealousy issues. But this isn't an ideal world, people have agendas which they bring to all their relationships and then involve unsuspecting bystanders. Swinging is an activity that will either strengthen a bond or highlight it's cracks I think.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I've been on fab for almost 4 years. I like to keep a low profile. I dip in and out , like most people, I'm sure. I bring this up to underline that I'm not a naive novice.
I've met a few couples socially, and sexually. Now, due to always wanting to be sure that the couple is secure in their relationship, I rarely play with couples (the last time was over a year ago).
I tend not to speak to one half of the couple more than the other unless the other has specified this is okay. I am very respectful of boundaries and very much aware of situations. I rarely message someone unless messaged first.
Now, my rant is.... why, oh why, do couples "swing" and say they both play, love meeting men and women and both have permission to play with others, when all the verifications are of the female meeting single males. And if the male speaks to another female (once, for a few days or months) does the female suddenly throw in the jealousy towel. (Yes I know this happens with men too, but there's far to much men bashing on here already)
Personally, I don't see the point of being in a relationship and swinging unless you're both aware of what both of you want, and understand each other's emotions.
I am ready for a torrent of abuse now
We can't speak for all couples, but we only swing as a couple and don't meet separately, so we both know what the other is doing as we do it together, I'm guessing the female half of the couple didn't know her OH was messaging?
Which is an issue that they need to sort out, it may not be a jealousy issue if one didn't know what the other one was doing, if that makes sense "
Oh it's happened a few times not just today. But I've spoken to both people in the couples.
I know it's been an issue for other people too.
I'm just a bit grr about it today  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"I've been on fab for almost 4 years. I like to keep a low profile. I dip in and out , like most people, I'm sure. I bring this up to underline that I'm not a naive novice.
I've met a few couples socially, and sexually. Now, due to always wanting to be sure that the couple is secure in their relationship, I rarely play with couples (the last time was over a year ago).
I tend not to speak to one half of the couple more than the other unless the other has specified this is okay. I am very respectful of boundaries and very much aware of situations. I rarely message someone unless messaged first.
Now, my rant is.... why, oh why, do couples "swing" and say they both play, love meeting men and women and both have permission to play with others, when all the verifications are of the female meeting single males. And if the male speaks to another female (once, for a few days or months) does the female suddenly throw in the jealousy towel. (Yes I know this happens with men too, but there's far to much men bashing on here already)
Personally, I don't see the point of being in a relationship and swinging unless you're both aware of what both of you want, and understand each other's emotions.
I am ready for a torrent of abuse now "
I know where you are coming from totally on that it has put me off meeting couples as I can just do without the hassle. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Its good to be upfront and honest if others dont like it at least they can pass us by.
we arent jealous as we meet together and have fun.
i enjoy watchibg D.c playing and vise versa.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Mr ess and I swing together as its something we wish to experience with each other, if at any point either of us began to feel jealous or uncomfortable we would stop, swinging is only enjoyable when all people involved are happy and comfortable in the situation. I dont understand why couples swing when things arent great between them, surely that can only lead to problems
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Because some women don't want to feel as though their nose has been put out of joint by another woman but are happy to be allowed to play with other men
I don't understand why they would state they play separately though,its only going to cause needless hassle if one of them isn't happy about it
They need to be honest with each other |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"You've probably just pointed out a few truths that people might not be comfortable with.
It's why I try to be honest on my profile regardless of who might judge me. "
I have a habit of doing that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You've probably just pointed out a few truths that people might not be comfortable with.
It's why I try to be honest on my profile regardless of who might judge me.
I have a habit of doing that."
Totally prefer that, even if it upsets people
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When I was on here as a couple lots if not most other couples approaches were from the male half, always eager to speak with my partner at the time, yet via there control their Mrs was rarely allowed to communicate. At the time thought this was odd as should be a united partnership. There are far more jealously and control issues on here than you initially imagine with lots of couples at differing stages of the journey. |
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A couple in the past once said that up to 70% is male driven within couples with the balance being shared or fems looking to experiment with their bi side.....at the time that rang true with lots me and my ex chatted to. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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With us it's a joint decision who we meet. I ( Lucy ) am the one that's on fab 95% of the time, but if we are wanting to arrange a play or social meet with a view to play then Luke will log in and take a look at the profiles and messages, I can't see how it would work comfortably if it was only one of us doing the driving as it were. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've been on fab for almost 4 years. I like to keep a low profile. I dip in and out , like most people, I'm sure. I bring this up to underline that I'm not a naive novice.
I've met a few couples socially, and sexually. Now, due to always wanting to be sure that the couple is secure in their relationship, I rarely play with couples (the last time was over a year ago).
I tend not to speak to one half of the couple more than the other unless the other has specified this is okay. I am very respectful of boundaries and very much aware of situations. I rarely message someone unless messaged first.
Now, my rant is.... why, oh why, do couples "swing" and say they both play, love meeting men and women and both have permission to play with others, when all the verifications are of the female meeting single males. And if the male speaks to another female (once, for a few days or months) does the female suddenly throw in the jealousy towel. (Yes I know this happens with men too, but there's far to much men bashing on here already)
Personally, I don't see the point of being in a relationship and swinging unless you're both aware of what both of you want, and understand each other's emotions.
I am ready for a torrent of abuse now
We can't speak for all couples, but we only swing as a couple and don't meet separately, so we both know what the other is doing as we do it together, I'm guessing the female half of the couple didn't know her OH was messaging?
Which is an issue that they need to sort out, it may not be a jealousy issue if one didn't know what the other one was doing, if that makes sense "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't meet couples and one reason for that is it seems an awful lot of hassle sometimes being sure that you're not going to get caught up in someone else's relationship drama. |
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