FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Married men..

Married men..

By *ikeuontop OP Man over a year ago

Oldbury

- please don't hold back your options - i'm keen to hear peoples _iews - but why should a married man be the root of all evil on a site such as this?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Run for cover!!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Because it's a swingers site not a cheating site

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By *lintessential1Man over a year ago

Ross-on-Wye

"Because it's a swingers site not a cheating site"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

" - please don't hold back your options - i'm keen to hear peoples _iews - but why should a married man be the root of all evil on a site such as this?"

Because for a lot of people swinging is based on trust and honesty

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By *isscheekychopsWoman over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

god help you, hope you got your tin hat ready...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

god help you, hope you got your tin hat ready..."

Not even he can help.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Because it's a swingers site not a cheating site"

What about the married woman here?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Because 'even in the world of swinging' we have choices and that can include not fucking attached people.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

" - please don't hold back your options - i'm keen to hear peoples _iews - but why should a married man be the root of all evil on a site such as this?

Because for a lot of people swinging is based on trust and honesty

Exactly

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman over a year ago

evesham

Why do you think they shouldn't be? Why do you think it strange that 'even on a swinging site' cheating is not tolerated by a lot of people?

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By *ambslass48Woman over a year ago

Peterborough

I used to be a married swinger before my hubby passed away but different for me as he was severely disabled and never hid either fact

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By *ikeuontop OP Man over a year ago

Oldbury

That's why a man or should I say I on here, doesnt want to entertain the realms of an affair as that is full blown cheating - surely it's just an NSA experience that 99% of people attach to their profiles

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"That's why a man or should I say I on here, doesnt want to entertain the realms of an affair as that is full blown cheating - surely it's just an NSA experience that 99% of people attach to their profiles "

Its your life and your marriage. If your comfortable with what youre doing theres no need to try and justify it on here

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Because it's a swingers site not a cheating site"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Its your life and your marriage. If your comfortable with what youre doing theres no need to try and justify it on here

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By *issHottieBottieWoman over a year ago

Kent

I don't agree with anyone married or in a relationship being on here without their partners consent:

However as long as it's clear on your profile so people can make an informed decision then that's up to them.

I've come across married guys who have messaged me then been shocked when I've turned them down for being married and cheating, like they don't understand why that is a problem!!!

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By *trawberry-popWoman over a year ago

South East Midlands NOT

I'd never meet a married man or even a man with a girlfriend. It's wrong wrong wrong. And actually, i'm not a fuck and go kind of girl. 90% of my meets I still talk to. Heck, one of them is now my best friend (met 3 years ago) and I think you will find a lot of swingers make friendships.

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman over a year ago

evesham

Ask your wife if she thinks NSA sex is cheating ot not.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Maybe even ask your children??

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By *nvictusMan over a year ago

Beeston

I've seen the massive damage and trauma that discovering your husband has been swinging and dogging behind you back can do. The woman concerned is still damaged and emotionally scarred years later

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Cheating is cheating...wheather it's a one night stand, new meet from here or full blown affair it's all the same & still cheating.

Swinging is about trust & honesty.....cheating is about lies & dishonesty. They are at opposite ends of the sexual scale.

If you choose to cheat and you're honest about it with the people you meet that's your business, but a lot of people won't meet attached people.

People seem surprised that swingers have morals too.

Good luck and I hope you took out forum insurance before you posted this thread.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Ask your wife if she thinks NSA sex is cheating ot not. "

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Ask your wife if she thinks NSA sex is cheating ot not. "

OP, would you be happy for your wife to meet complete strangers for a pointless shag? If yes then crack on, if its not cheating, your conscience is clear!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

" - please don't hold back your options - i'm keen to hear peoples _iews - but why should a married man be the root of all evil on a site such as this?"

It is easy to wag a finger of accusation, but at the end of the day, we all have weaknesses. I wonder what percentage of swinging relationships started out with the male partners suggestions and coaxing. You could argue that his "impure" thoughts led his partner down a road she would never otherwise taken. In other words it was the males impure, wandering thoughts ?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Ha ha rightous lot will love this thread

hi up on their mound of bull shit!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

There are a fair few 'couples' on here that both are attached to others ! And can i ask. . People that go to clubs. . Do you just assume any solo women or men are not attached. . Or do they have to sign something before any play takes place ? Heh

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By *ikeuontop OP Man over a year ago

Oldbury

Well I thought I'd open a controversial debate - not seeking justification off anyone here just seeing opions

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Because it's a swingers site not a cheating site

What about the married woman here?"

Don't worry, we're the root of all evil too, just tend to start less forum posts about it.

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By *isscheekychopsWoman over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

Is your conscious getting the better of you to ask such a question? Or are you seeking acceptance from a bunch of strangers that meeting people off a sex site when married is ok? At the end of the day it's your marriage but if it goes tits up because she found out you were on fab...it does happen!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Because it's a swingers site not a cheating site

What about the married woman here?"

I was just going to bring that subject up

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By *isscheekychopsWoman over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

"There are a fair few 'couples' on here that both are attached to others ! And can i ask. . People that go to clubs. . Do you just assume any solo women or men are not attached. . Or do they have to sign something before any play takes place ? Heh "

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Married men and women are on here playing away along with cpls and singles. Its their choice and thats why the scene is supposed to be relaxed. Not all partners will know what the other one is upto. Some partners are happy that the other 1/2 is not having affairs or paying for sex. Its just sex to some people....

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By *issHottieBottieWoman over a year ago

Kent

"Ha ha rightous lot will love this thread

hi up on their mound of bull shit!

How are people who don't want to be involved in something that could quite possibly lead to ruining some unsuspecting wife (or husbands) life be righteous??

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By *isscheekychopsWoman over a year ago

The land of grey peas and bacon

"Married men and women are on here playing away along with cpls and singles. Its their choice and thats why the scene is supposed to be relaxed. Not all partners will know what the other one is upto. Some partners are happy that the other 1/2 is not having affairs or paying for sex. Its just sex to some people...."

But ultimately sex, lies and dishonesty can destroy lives

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By *issHottieBottieWoman over a year ago

Kent

I think that if the partner would be shoot about those things there would be no need to sneak about to do it. I know people on here who for whatever reason have no sex life with their partner and have agreed on an open relationship. No dishonesty, lying, sneaking about or chance of the other person getting hurt by finding out!

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By *risky_MareWoman over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"I don't agree with anyone married or in a relationship being on here without their partners consent:

However as long as it's clear on your profile so people can make an informed decision then that's up to them.

I've come across married guys who have messaged me then been shocked when I've turned them down for being married and cheating, like they don't understand why that is a problem!!!"

Yes I have to admit I'm getting fed up with married men engaging me in conversation without revealing they are married, wasting my time, it should be on their profile.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I don't arrange meets with men off here knowing they are married or attached, however your points regarding the clubs is a good point, no doubt when I've been to a club I may of unknowingly played with a married guy..."
thanks. . I was hoping someone would see sense. I think if someone is that upset about married people playing away. . A swing site is probably not ideal. Lets face it. . If someone can hide their shinanigans from their other half. . They can easily fool others into thinking they are single. Of course i'm not saying that is a very nice way to go about things. . But i'll wager it goes on a fair amount

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Married is fine if you are playing together, it's what swinging is based on to begin with.

Married and playing away from home whatever gender you are is wrong in my book.

It's hurtful, deceitful and disrespectful to all parties involved.

Some are happy to play with married people who are not doing it with their partners others aren't

The main point is be honest about your marital status so others have the ability to make an informed choice.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

if i found out my 'bf' or husband was seinging behind my back hed have to be ready for a pasting

If youre not happy you leave ... theres always an excuse to follow im married lol

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman over a year ago

evesham

You're right,go SOME people and to others they are opening theor relationship to others and find it hard to do that with someone who can so easily betray the person they are supposed to love.

The scene is 'relaxed' in relation to the conventional boundaries of relationships with all.parties aware of what the other is up to. That doesn't mean to say that everyone should accept people who choose to cheat.

There are a variety of reasons as to why a person (male or female) would choose to play whilst married, could be lack of sex in the relationship, could be illness of the partner, sexual incompatibility etc nut for most the sticking point is the fact that some partners don't know about the extra marital activities and that doesn't sit well with them. Is that wrong? Is that self righteous?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"if i found out my 'bf' or husband was seinging behind my back hed have to be ready for a pasting

If youre not happy you leave ... theres always an excuse to follow im married lol"
so are the men who _iewed you on cam all confirmed single ? Tee hee !

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I didnt fuck them

nor can i control who _iews me in the chat

Also im not provocative on cam so all the doing is looking at my face no different to a picture

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I don't agree with anyone married or in a relationship being on here without their partners consent:

However as long as it's clear on your profile so people can make an informed decision then that's up to them.

I've come across married guys who have messaged me then been shocked when I've turned them down for being married and cheating, like they don't understand why that is a problem!!!"

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By *icecouple561Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

Some are bothered and some aren't. Stick with those that aren't and don't try and pretend that you're doing your partner a favour by having NSA sex instead of an affair and everything will be fine.

For myself I would rather not meet married people whose partners aren't aware if some people think that means I'm righteous and sitting on a pile of crap I guess I can live with it.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Moral relativism and trust - so what happens if you discover that "unmarried man" who was not upfront with you, or didn't tell you on your first meet, was really married?

Do you then actually find all unmarried men, or just the most skilful liars?

What about S.T.I.s? Can you trust someone to be clear from them?

What about fetishes, what if some make you feel uncomfortable?

We're all adults and he without sin shouldn't cast the first stone, but its a very grey world of morality - there are lots of shades of vanilla too...

Philosophers, step up...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Married men or women mmmm tough one is say cheating 99% of the time as neither of them no about it or the site only the 1% that do no . I'm never to sure so I stay clear

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By *ikeuontop OP Man over a year ago

Oldbury

Well thanks for your responses - lets put a little detail in and see from there - one comment about the coaxing predominantly by the male I would imagine be relevant in many profiles on here - my wife likes the idea of having experiences I'm sure many of you have had - in fantasy - and to put a joint profile I feel would be leading all future contacts astray - hence being tagged "time wasters " we have never indulged in the scene before and she would like to be ominous - now how do put that in a profile..???!!!

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman over a year ago

evesham

She would like to be ominous?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

99%!

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By *issHottieBottieWoman over a year ago

Kent

"Well thanks for your responses - lets put a little detail in and see from there - one comment about the coaxing predominantly by the male I would imagine be relevant in many profiles on here - my wife likes the idea of having experiences I'm sure many of you have had - in fantasy - and to put a joint profile I feel would be leading all future contacts astray - hence being tagged "time wasters " we have never indulged in the scene before and she would like to be ominous - now how do put that in a profile..???!!!

You've totally lost me now.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

You do know you can have experiences without being on fabs.

Why don't you go to a club night with your wife and see what she thinks of the scene.

If she likes then create a joint profile , if she doesn't well you have your answer!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Just a rhetorical question: there are so many couples out there looking for that elusive single bi female to join them in a no holds barred FFM, I wonder if a married female playing without permission contacted them would they relax their position on 'no marrieds'?

No need to answer anyone, I already know the answer is a resounding 'absolutely not, it makes no difference if it's a man or a woman'

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Because it's a swingers site not a cheating site

What about the married woman here?"

Personally I don't differentiate. I think that on the forums they are perceived differently because you never really see married women seeking justification or complaining that they are hard done by.

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By *icecouple561Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

Was that auto correct and your wife would like to remain anonymous?

You might find that a problem when meeting people but give it a go, you'll never know if you don't try.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Because it's a swingers site not a cheating site

What about the married woman here?

Personally I don't differentiate. I think that on the forums they are perceived differently because you never really see married women seeking justification or complaining that they are hard done by.

I agree. It's none of my business what people do. Maybe something's are best kept quiet

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By *icecouple561Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

"Because it's a swingers site not a cheating site

What about the married woman here?

Personally I don't differentiate. I think that on the forums they are perceived differently because you never really see married women seeking justification or complaining that they are hard done by.

Nor me.

Everyone has a life story that leads them to different places. We know some married men socially from here who we like a lot, they respect our take on things and we theirs.

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By *ikeuontop OP Man over a year ago

Oldbury

Yea that's the word ...Anonymous..lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Yea that's the word ...Anonymous..lol

Plus I'm a lot more into than my wife is - on the one hand I don't want to force her into a situation where she's uncomfortable - but on the other I would like to be in that situation and have that experience - so trying to juggle either way - give up I thinks "
i've seem guys who try and do this . . Many times . It tends never to work if the man wants it and tries to coax her . It's a much bigger step for a woman most of the time. Men can disconnect the emotion and possible guilt from this kind of thing . Of course i'm being general. . But that's because i've seen enough evidence to convince me of how most people deal with this area of adventure

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By *icecouple561Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

"Yea that's the word ...Anonymous..lol

I see.

Time, discussion, honesty and love could lead both of you to a solution that you are both happy with.

Does your wife know you're talking about her on here?

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By *risky_MareWoman over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

"Moral relativism and trust - so what happens if you discover that "unmarried man" who was not upfront with you, or didn't tell you on your first meet, was really married?

Then he has actively deceived me, so no, I won't meet him again. Been there, done that......

“I'm not upset that you lied to me, I'm upset that from now on I can't believe you”. — Friedrich Nietzsche.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Because it's a swingers site not a cheating site"

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By *risky_MareWoman over a year ago

...Up on the Downs

" I was hoping someone would see sense. I think if someone is that upset about married people playing away. . A swing site is probably not ideal.

Dating sites are even worse - it's ubiquitous on the internet. And I agree, clubs must contain a fairly high proportion of married 'singles' who just meet on a 'no questions asked' basis.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

" - please don't hold back your options - i'm keen to hear peoples _iews - but why should a married man be the root of all evil on a site such as this?

Because for a lot of people swinging is based on trust and honesty

Beautiful said

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Its all moral relativism (as someone said).

If what you're doing will/does not knowingly result in the emotional, mental or physical destruction / betrayal of another human soul (particularly one for which you should care deeply for), then judgement for your actions exists only with yourself and your God.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

" - please don't hold back your options - i'm keen to hear peoples _iews - but why should a married man be the root of all evil on a site such as this?"

I don't feel they're the root of all evil.....simply foolish, as they have so much to lose (I assume).

Wives are astute creatures, some probably have suspicions about their partners 'secret', but choose to ignore it or can't prove anything.

Then again, nobody truly knows what brought the guy to this situation to begin with - rightly or wrongly.

I personally don't give married men a verbal bashing, its up to me whether I choose to meet with them or not - but ultimately its up to them to be upfront in order for me to make that decision, but that is also their choice.

Is ignorance bliss I wonder?!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I don't think they are evil.

I just don't agree with what they are doing, I have been cheated on and there is nothing worse than that feeling when your world shifts so dramtically

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Its all right saying it doesn't bother you lol but when the wife finds out and knocks ten bells of shit out of you - then it'll bother you haha

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By *organ and rob zombieCouple over a year ago

bradford

"Because it's a swingers site not a cheating site

What about the married woman here?"

Agreed

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Because it's a swingers site not a cheating site

What about the married woman here?"

Same goes for them

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

" - please don't hold back your options - i'm keen to hear peoples _iews - but why should a married man be the root of all evil on a site such as this?"

Do you have any idea what swinging is about?

If you did, you would understand.

Whining married people do my fucking head in.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

" - please don't hold back your options - i'm keen to hear peoples _iews - but why should a married man be the root of all evil on a site such as this?

Do you have any idea what swinging is about?

If you did, you would understand.

Whining married people do my fucking head in.

He goes onto clarify his own position within the thread.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Because its ok for women to cheat on here and not single men, as there are so many single men around lol

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

" - please don't hold back your options - i'm keen to hear peoples _iews - but why should a married man be the root of all evil on a site such as this?

Do you have any idea what swinging is about?

If you did, you would understand.

Whining married people do my fucking head in.

He goes onto clarify his own position within the thread."

Ok found it, thanks.

My comment still stands though. Not aimed at the OP, aimed at whining married people.

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By *ustyWoman over a year ago

inverclyde

a married or attached man/woman on site and the other half got no idea they are on spells one thing to me .... cheating simple, if your on here due to being unhappy or a sexless marriage then sort it out

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By *all-Eddies QosCouple over a year ago

wirral

Swinging though, tome , means swapping partners....single people are just sleeping around aren't they?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Sorry but cheating is not always black and white you don't know their story.

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By *ocksalt69Man over a year ago

cardiff

"Just a rhetorical question: there are so many couples out there looking for that elusive single bi female to join them in a no holds barred FFM, I wonder if a married female playing without permission contacted them would they relax their position on 'no marrieds'?

No need to answer anyone, I already know the answer is a resounding 'absolutely not, it makes no difference if it's a man or a woman'

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I am single and love meeting married women, the sex is best with them, cos you know her pusssie is taken

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By *iewMan over a year ago
Forum Mod

Angus & Findhorn

"Sorry but cheating is not always black and white you don't know their story."

I agree but they should just get on with it, it is usually when they ask for opinions, it gets heated as not everyone agrees with it.....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

when i was with my ex and he wasnt that highky sexed, we agreed that i could swing long as it wasnt mentioned at home who i was seeing and long as i didnt use the house

many people knew this situation and the fact when i was on cam he was behind me alot of the time, in all this time only 2 people asked to speak tohim for proof

it worked for us

but as i knew deep down it was over well before that

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Swinging though, tome , means swapping partners....single people are just sleeping around aren't they?"

Not all. Some are swingers. (I think)

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By *adystephanieTV/TS over a year ago

glos

Had a married guy contact me just last night, wants to meet alone but is on a couples profile.

I said no thank you, I would only ever meet if your wife approved.......

Oh that's no problem I will get her ring you before we meet .......gulp!!! That's a first

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sorry but cheating is not always black and white you don't know their story.

I agree but they should just get on with it, it is usually when they ask for opinions, it gets heated as not everyone agrees with it.....

"
I agree they should just get on with it but Nobody is ever going to agree on one thing its just not possible

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Because it's a swingers site not a cheating site

What about the married woman here?"

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By *iewMan over a year ago
Forum Mod

Angus & Findhorn

"Sorry but cheating is not always black and white you don't know their story.

I agree but they should just get on with it, it is usually when they ask for opinions, it gets heated as not everyone agrees with it.....

I agree they should just get on with it but Nobody is ever going to agree on one thing its just not possible "

yup....

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

We don't meet married men or woman playing away, but the thing is how do you know if they have not stated they are married, and I guess there is a few married with only Single Profiles

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I am single and love meeting married women, the sex is best with them, cos you know her pusssie is taken

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"We don't meet married men or woman playing away, but the thing is how do you know if they have not stated they are married, and I guess there is a few married with only Single Profiles "
There isn't 100% a way of working out if they are married.

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By *CoastFunMan over a year ago

Southampron

Whilst this is a swinging site we know that some are on here to simply meet up as singles for NSA sex. As long as people are up front as to whether they are married / involved or now who really cares. It is then down to each individual to decide whether they then continue to meat up or not.

What is out of order is getting grief from someone if you reject their offers due to the fact that they are involved and their partners don't know. People need to show respect. Sadly some simply cannot handle rejection

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

People do what people do cheating isn't ideal but we have heard arguments both ways and can see merit in them. In life though there are a hell of a lot more serious things people can do than have sex out of wedlock.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Whilst this is a swinging site we know that some are on here to simply meet up as singles for NSA sex. As long as people are up front as to whether they are married / involved or now who really cares. It is then down to each individual to decide whether they then continue to meat up or not.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Because it's a swingers site not a cheating site"

Many says singles are not swingers so maybe you shouldn't be on here too.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"We don't meet married men or woman playing away, but the thing is how do you know if they have not stated they are married, and I guess there is a few married with only Single Profiles There isn't 100% a way of working out if they are married."

So nobody who says they don't meet married men or woman, can't reall say they don't

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By *histler21Man over a year ago

Ipswich

According to Wikipedia (the fount of all knowledge):

"Swinging, also known as wife swapping or partner swapping, is a non-monogamous behavior, in which partners in a committed relationship engage in sexual activities with others as a recreational or social activity."

Hence - the only people who can truthfully call themselves swingers are those in a relationship. People with single male or female profiles cannot therefore be swingers.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

So nobody who says they don't meet married men or woman, can't reall say they don't "
I don't believe they can no you can probably minimize the chance but i would say it would be impossible to say you don't meet married people 100%

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By *CoastFunMan over a year ago

Southampron

*meet not meat, I have a case of brain fry going on

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"According to Wikipedia (the fount of all knowledge):

Hence - the only people who can truthfully call themselves swingers are those in a relationship. People with single male or female profiles cannot therefore be swingers."

Wikibollocks.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"According to Wikipedia (the fount of all knowledge):

Hence - the only people who can truthfully call themselves swingers are those in a relationship. People with single male or female profiles cannot therefore be swingers."

If all single male and female profiles were forced to leave the site, the "true swingers" would be having a lot less fun.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"According to Wikipedia (the fount of all knowledge):

Hence - the only people who can truthfully call themselves swingers are those in a relationship. People with single male or female profiles cannot therefore be swingers.

If all single male and female profiles were forced to leave the site, the "true swingers" would be having a lot less fun. "

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If married or attached guys do not feel guilty at all about cheating on there wifes and familys . Put it on there profile and let people decide . Instead of chatting and getting to know someone before they give the old sob story. About how there life is so bad and we sleep in seperate beds and all the rest of the crap

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Sorry but cheating is not always black and white you don't know their story.

I agree but they should just get on with it, it is usually when they ask for opinions, it gets heated as not everyone agrees with it.....

I agree they should just get on with it but Nobody is ever going to agree on one thing its just not possible "

Exactly this....

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By *oth_cook69Couple over a year ago

WOKING

Not all married guys want to play behind their wive's back. Unfortunately we all get tarred with the same brush, even if we say we are happy to prove we are genuine.

Mrs Cook wants Mr Cook to have some fun with a lady or couple and come home and tell her all about it but everyone runs a mile.... Maybe Mr Cook is just pig ugly!!!!

If anyone is interested please get in touch.

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By *igerandKittenCouple over a year ago

London

Look, there's never going to be a right or wrong answer because as has been said everyone's situation is different.

But for my two cents I cannot get past the emotional pain a cheating partner is causing. I would never knowingly play with one, but you can't always tell.

It's a complete turn-off knowing that somewhere there is a person who would be devastated if they found out what their partner is doing. And I think that anyone who has ever been cheated on should keep in mind how they felt at the time.

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By *ratty_DamselWoman over a year ago

Greater London

" - please don't hold back your options - i'm keen to hear peoples _iews - but why should a married man be the root of all evil on a site such as this?

Because for a lot of people swinging is based on trust and honesty

Really or is that merely the ideal.....?

So what about the people who sleep with married men who are aware of the situation or actively seeking them to reduce the risk of someone getting too attached and affecting their real life.

Hmm. Some of the swingers I have met via this site have been far from honest. For instance the so called single men who claim to be straight but are seeking TV's etc or howabout the bb fans who claim to use protection etc etc.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 01/10/14 21:34:56]

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Because it's a swingers site not a cheating site

Many says singles are not swingers so maybe you shouldn't be on here too. "

I don't class myself as a swinger

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Yes this is primarily and originally and always will be a swingers site. However it is also the most straightforward and honest site for people who want to meet other people in a sexual, but non-swinging way.

It's sad and unfortunate that the site has been usurped this way, but for people like me there are no other sites as varied, genuine and accomodating.

There are people here, both male and female, with secrets, urges, needs and kinks which they can't admit to, express or fulfill in their daily lives - this site can give those people - myself included - at least a partial release.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Because it's a swingers site not a cheating site

Many says singles are not swingers so maybe you shouldn't be on here too.

I don't class myself as a swinger"

The question has to be asked then why on earth are you on this site?

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By *nvictusMan over a year ago

Beeston

I'm a swingle ...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

" - please don't hold back your options - i'm keen to hear peoples _iews - but why should a married man be the root of all evil on a site such as this?"

If they lie about it,it's taking my freedom of choice away !

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Because it's a swingers site not a cheating site

Many says singles are not swingers so maybe you shouldn't be on here too.

I don't class myself as a swinger

The question has to be asked then why on earth are you on this site?"

You're single too, so why are you on here?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I've had a woman contact me tonight asking if I've met her husband because she found my name on his friends list. I sent him a message to ask him if he was married and ive just had a shitty reply back...This is why I never meet attached men. ..grrrrr

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I'm single and have been on this site a few months now. I am always being contacted by married men who pretend to be single. The level of deceit is quite something. I would never meet a married man knowingly. I think it's wrong and why would I waste my time with a liar.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Correct we sign up for NSA fun not to be confronted by the unsuspecting other half ....

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By *illy ojMan over a year ago

city

Question to all above posters have ever ever cheated on a partner think about it and b honest with yourself at least.Reason I'm on here secretly is I have a desire to do this . my partner doesn't so I'm not gona make coax plead her do something she really doesn't want to do and I don't wanna die wondering still haven't heard an opinion on women on here 'cheating' that seems to b not as bad as a man doing same imo

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I have been with my wife for 21 years married for 16 years. We have differing sexual needs. For about 8 years I tried to change her. For about 10 years I tried to change myself. Neither works.

I now accept my wife and myself for who we are and make sure we both have what we need.

In my case I am on here to express and fulfil sexual needs which my wife has no intention of accomodating or even acknowledging.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

...and I really shouldn't post after a bottle of wine has switched off my forum post filters

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I've had a woman contact me tonight asking if I've met her husband because she found my name on his friends list. I sent him a message to ask him if he was married and ive just had a shitty reply back...This is why I never meet attached men. ..grrrrr"
in 3 months you've had sex with a couple (were they a couple or just long term swing friends ? ) and two solos . .did you have them checked out for marital status ?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Because it's a swingers site not a cheating site

Many says singles are not swingers so maybe you shouldn't be on here too.

I don't class myself as a swinger

The question has to be asked then why on earth are you on this site?

You're single too, so why are you on here?"

Im a swinger I didn't say I wasn't like you. So why are you here as you were the one to point out it was a swingers site in the first place?

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By *parkle1974Woman over a year ago

Leeds

Truth and honesty on here.......you must be joking

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Not cheating just my sexual desires are more stronger without the wife about !!!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Truth and honesty on here.......you must be joking"

Weyyy you win the goldfish for hitting the target dead centre

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By *parkle1974Woman over a year ago

Leeds

"Truth and honesty on here.......you must be joking

Weyyy you win the goldfish for hitting the target dead centre

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Truth and honesty on here.......you must be joking

Weyyy you win the goldfish for hitting the target dead centre

"
yup . . If you expect and want to find a solo swing partner to meet 4 days a week . Sure . . Be bothered about married folks . Otherwise. . The 11th commandment should kick in . ' thou shalt not kid thyself'

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

" - please don't hold back your options - i'm keen to hear peoples _iews - but why should a married man be the root of all evil on a site such as this?"

Why not? someone has to do the job

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I prefer married men. They are less likely to get attached to me and I them.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I prefer married men. They are less likely to get attached to me and I them. "
you SO have a pm ! Heh

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

What bs! People have been commenting about married women too.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If it's a married man OR woman that can prove that their OH knows about them being on here ie having a couples profile but stipulating only one of them plays, confirming it in Chat etc then I see no issue.

It's the ones that do it behind the partners back and are cheating I don't agree with.

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By *iss_tressWoman over a year ago

London

"Sorry but cheating is not always black and white you don't know their story."

Why would I want to? I'm seeking drama free nsa see. As I've mentioned on these whiney married men threads before: I could care less if you're married you're the one who will have to explain to the wife where your pubes went, the wax in your chest hair, the paddle marks on your bum, the abrasions around your wrists and the "property of Miss Vee" tattoo on your arse,

Funnily enough married men tend to give me a wide berth although some do have the audacity to ask if I could "tone it down" a bit to meet them!!!

Yeah...right!!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Nope I've never cheated on anybody, always been faithful. The boyfriends on the other hand have cheated on me

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By *icecouple561Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex

"I prefer married men. They are less likely to get attached to me and I them. "

A lot of people say this. I think the opposite. Sex brings an intimacy and closeness that can't be found in any other physical act if, as many of the married men and women say on here they are living in a sexless marriage doesn't the probability of becoming attached increase?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I prefer married men. They are less likely to get attached to me and I them.

Agreed!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

You've totally lost me now. "

I fully understand whee he is coming from. Sandra never comes on this site. Anything we have ever arranged, in the past, has always been initially set up by myself. Of course, we will both agree on final meeting arrangements etc.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Had a married guy contact me just last night, wants to meet alone but is on a couples profile.

I said no thank you, I would only ever meet if your wife approved.......

Oh that's no problem I will get her ring you before we meet .......gulp!!! That's a first

I ( Rick) was once chatting to a lady, via a forum, and she said she would like to chat on the phone. The she mentioned that she had reservations, as she knew I was married. I told her it was fine, and if she would feel more at ease, I could pass the phone to Sandra. She admitted to being pleasantly surprised, when Sandra came to the phone !!

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman over a year ago

evesham

"Not cheating just my sexual desires are more stronger without the wife about !!!!"

Sorry to break it to you but if you act on those desires then it's cheating!

If it's not cheating then tell your wife you are on here, surely she will be fine with it as it's not cheating.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Because it's a swingers site not a cheating site"

Simples indeed ... Its not a cheap brothel either. Swingers is in the title ... But we know some can't read.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Because it's a swingers site not a cheating site

Simples indeed ... Its not a cheap brothel either. Swingers is in the title ... But we know some can't read. "

It's great that your disinterested wife is fully supportive of your activities on here. The way it should be.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I regularly have sex with a married man, he's gorgeous and I couldn't resist. We usually bareback as well, lovely squelchy spunky sex. But then, he is married to me

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Some men are honest and up front about their relationship and circumstances but are all the single guys and women telling the truth ?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I prefer married men. They are less likely to get attached to me and I them.

Depends.....

Quite a few people say in various forum threads that they only meet once so it's just NSA sex, no feelings develop as there's no further contact.

On the other hand if you meet regularly then of course there's a real chance of what started off as NSA turning into something more.

Great if you both want that not so great if you don't or ones not free to.

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By *icefellatwoMan over a year ago

hastings

"I regularly have sex with a married man, he's gorgeous and I couldn't resist. We usually bareback as well, lovely squelchy spunky sex. But then, he is married to me

Ten out of ten

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Some men are honest and up front about their relationship and circumstances but are all the single guys and women telling the truth ?"

Only the individual knows if they're telling the truth. My married radar usually clicks into action when a guy can only do daytime meets during the week and he can only text at certain times. I've then gone back and asked if they're attached and to be fair they've said yes, but there was nothing on their profile reflecting that they have a partner!

I'm not judge and jury, people do things , both male and female for their own reasons and I'm not living their life. Honesty is the main thing though, because then others can make an informed choice.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

They are trying to get a free shag with someone elses wife/girlfriend/fuckbuddy...if they want to be on here..bring their own!!! Or at least be honest and admit wifey isn.t on the scene...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Some men are honest and up front about their relationship and circumstances but are all the single guys and women telling the truth

I'm not judge and jury, people do things , both male and female for their own reasons and I'm not living their life. Honesty is the main thing though, because then others can make an informed choice. "

This! They are easy to spot most of the time!

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By *EXY50ishWoman over a year ago

Anywhere and nowhere

"Maybe even ask your children??"

Whoah everyone is entitled to an opinion but I doubt many children would approve of swinging regardless of it being cheating or not. Mine certainly wouldn't - in fact I know them well enough to know that they could probably cope with an affair, but absolutely not having sex with strangers for fun

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By *icefellatwoMan over a year ago

hastings

"They are trying to get a free shag with someone elses wife/girlfriend/fuckbuddy...if they want to be on here..bring their own!!! Or at least be honest and admit wifey isn.t on the scene...

I am married and it says so on my profile.

some of us have good reasons for being on here that others wouldn't understand.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I regularly have sex with a married man, he's gorgeous and I couldn't resist. We usually bareback as well, lovely squelchy spunky sex. But then, he is married to me

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

" - please don't hold back your options - i'm keen to hear peoples _iews - but why should a married man be the root of all evil on a site such as this?"

If your wife is willing to speak up for you and give you her permission to play away then no reason why you shouldn't be here.

If it's being done in secret then you are being dishonest to her your marriage and yourself.

Honesty and trust is important to swingers and this is why so many dislike cheats no matter what the back story is.

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By *dventuroususCouple over a year ago

sunderland

"They are trying to get a free shag with someone elses wife/girlfriend/fuckbuddy...if they want to be on here..bring their own!!! Or at least be honest and admit wifey isn.t on the scene...

I am married and it says so on my profile.

some of us have good reasons for being on here that others wouldn't understand."

there are many reasons that people use to try and justify cheating, however none of them are good.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

The day society stops improperly using sex as a barometer of love, caring and affection; "cheating" will be able to be discussed in a reasonable non-emotional manner. Until that time we will have polarised _iews.

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By *icefellatwoMan over a year ago

hastings

"They are trying to get a free shag with someone elses wife/girlfriend/fuckbuddy...if they want to be on here..bring their own!!! Or at least be honest and admit wifey isn.t on the scene...

I am married and it says so on my profile.

some of us have good reasons for being on here that others wouldn't understand.

there are many reasons that people use to try and justify cheating, however none of them are good."

That is only in your opinion and unfortunately I have good reason to be

on here

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By *illy ojMan over a year ago

city

"The day society stops improperly using sex as a barometer of love, caring and affection; "cheating" will be able to be discussed in a reasonable non-emotional manner. Until that time we will have polarised _iews.

cudnt agree more. If it says no attached guys in a profile they don't get a msg from me I respect other people's preferences and wud expect same in return I proposely avoid people with halos and a lecture to spout at u coz they never turn out to be as perfect as they'd like u to believe

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

": I could care less if you're married you're the one who will have to explain to the wife where your pubes went, the wax in your chest hair, the paddle marks on your bum, the abrasions around your wrists and the "property of Miss Vee" tattoo on your arse!

I knew you were a big softy really, tattoo!!! what's wrong with a branding iron!!!

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By *dventuroususCouple over a year ago

sunderland

"They are trying to get a free shag with someone elses wife/girlfriend/fuckbuddy...if they want to be on here..bring their own!!! Or at least be honest and admit wifey isn.t on the scene...

I am married and it says so on my profile.

some of us have good reasons for being on here that others wouldn't understand.

there are many reasons that people use to try and justify cheating, however none of them are good.

That is only in your opinion and unfortunately I have good reason to be

on here "

You choose to be on here, there is a big difference, you choose to cheat on your partner, others also make that choice, many get on with it without making a fuss, others scream and shout when people choose not to get involved with them, some try to seek justification for doing what they are doing to make themselves feel better about it, the truth is the world isnt a perfect place, and many things happen that shouldnt, but there are no good reasons for these things happening, its just what people do, try and justify yourself, make yourself feel better, you cannot have a good reason to lie, cheat on, hurt, break the heart, betray the trust of the person you profess to love, if you love someone you dont do that to them under any circumstances, at the end of the day people will cheat but dont try and justify it as "good reason" or anything else, you are making a choice.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"They are trying to get a free shag with someone elses wife/girlfriend/fuckbuddy...if they want to be on here..bring their own!!! Or at least be honest and admit wifey isn.t on the scene...

I am married and it says so on my profile.

some of us have good reasons for being on here that others wouldn't understand.

there are many reasons that people use to try and justify cheating, however none of them are good.

That is only in your opinion and unfortunately I have good reason to be

on here

As much as that sounds harsh, it's also true. Although I guess it wouldn't be an easy thing to do, the best thing is to be honest with your partner. Then no cheating is taking place.

If anyone is in a marriage by name only, then again, surely it is better to make a statement to your partner that sexually you are going elsewhere? Why? Sometimes partners are not aware of the state of their relationship, and only one considers the partnership over.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Are you saying anyone who refuses to meet with someone who is attached is this imperfect-halo-wearing person? If so, nothing to so with preferences then?

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By *oomar1Man over a year ago

Stalybridge

I think the majority of couples on here are probably more honest than the single people

But I know quite a few married women on here and some even on here married and in a couples profile who have secret single profiles and play

If someone wants to cheat on their partner it's there choice

There the ones who will have to live with that

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If someone wants to cheat on their partner it's there choice

There the ones who will have to live with that

Oh the empathy for the "innocent" partner

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By *exycleanerWoman over a year ago

pontefract

"They are trying to get a free shag with someone elses wife/girlfriend/fuckbuddy...if they want to be on here..bring their own!!! Or at least be honest and admit wifey isn.t on the scene...

I am married and it says so on my profile.

some of us have good reasons for being on here that others wouldn't understand.

there are many reasons that people use to try and justify cheating, however none of them are good.

That is only in your opinion and unfortunately I have good reason to be

on here

best thing said so far there are NO good reasons to cheat women dont come on here bleating they not getting enough sex at home ,and its the same old thing time and time again ohh i have a bigger sex drive than my wife big deal ,as said further up CHEATING ruins lives and leaves you deeply scarred by it especially when the cheater wasnt going without sex

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

OMG are you kidding? 'Not full blown cheating'?? If I sound out my husband had had sex with another person behind my back that would most definitely be cheating!!!

Point is, if it's dishonest and not mutually agreed then it's abhorrent and potentially going to ruin someone's life. That's not something I want to be a part of!!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If someone wants to cheat on their partner it's there choice

There the ones who will have to live with that

WHO has to live with it? The person who's cheating clearly doesn't give a stuff, but the one who didn't choose for their partner to cheat. Don't they have to live with it too?!?!

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By *oomar1Man over a year ago

Stalybridge

If someone wants to cheat on their partner it's there choice

There the ones who will have to live with that

Oh the empathy for the "innocent" partner

I'm not saying it's right someone cheats

But it's there choice and have to live with it

Men and women on here and in the real world lie and cheat

Just like women in here moaning about their marriage

If it's bad get divorced simple

Just love how the majority on here have righteous _iews on a swingers site which 99% of people would see as morally wrong anyway

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By *icefellatwoMan over a year ago

hastings

"They are trying to get a free shag with someone elses wife/girlfriend/fuckbuddy...if they want to be on here..bring their own!!! Or at least be honest and admit wifey isn.t on the scene...

I am married and it says so on my profile.

some of us have good reasons for being on here that others wouldn't understand.

there are many reasons that people use to try and justify cheating, however none of them are good.

That is only in your opinion and unfortunately I have good reason to be

on here

Do you know what happens to women who have been molested by there brothers

when they were young!

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By *andS66Couple over a year ago

Derby

So if your wife was on here, or, indeed, anywhere, having casual sex without your knowledge, and you then found out, that would be ok with you because she's not having an affair and there's no attachment?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Why do you have to say your married on here? instead say you are single, have a white lie, nothing wrong with that lol.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Because it's a swingers site not a cheating site"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Some are bothered and some aren't. Stick with those that aren't and don't try and pretend that you're doing your partner a favour by having NSA sex instead of an affair and everything will be fine.

For myself I would rather not meet married people whose partners aren't aware if some people think that means I'm righteous and sitting on a pile of crap I guess I can live with it."
well said young lady!

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By *dventuroususCouple over a year ago

sunderland

"They are trying to get a free shag with someone elses wife/girlfriend/fuckbuddy...if they want to be on here..bring their own!!! Or at least be honest and admit wifey isn.t on the scene...

I am married and it says so on my profile.

some of us have good reasons for being on here that others wouldn't understand.

there are many reasons that people use to try and justify cheating, however none of them are good.

That is only in your opinion and unfortunately I have good reason to be

on here

Do you know what happens to women who have been molested by there brothers

when they were young!

why has that got anything to do with what I said???????

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Why do you have to say your married on here? instead say you are single, have a white lie, nothing wrong with that lol."
God if some woman found out after married they would go mad so best to tell the truth no lies.

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By *icefellatwoMan over a year ago

hastings

"They are trying to get a free shag with someone elses wife/girlfriend/fuckbuddy...if they want to be on here..bring their own!!! Or at least be honest and admit wifey isn.t on the scene...

I am married and it says so on my profile.

some of us have good reasons for being on here that others wouldn't understand.

there are many reasons that people use to try and justify cheating, however none of them are good.

That is only in your opinion and unfortunately I have good reason to be

on here

Do you know what happens to women who have been molested by there brothers

when they were young!

why has that got anything to do with what I said???????"

Think about it .

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Because it's a swingers site not a cheating site

What about the married woman here?"

Exactly !!!

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *icefellatwoMan over a year ago

hastings

"Because it's a swingers site not a cheating site

What about the married woman here?

Exactly !!! "

Its just peoples opinions,there are no

rules that say married people cant be on here

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Cheaters come in both sexes sometimes people fail to remember that.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Because it's a swingers site not a cheating site

What about the married woman here?

Exactly !!!

Its just peoples opinions,there are no

rules that say married people cant be on here "

No rules to say people will meet them either.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)

By *dventuroususCouple over a year ago

sunderland

"They are trying to get a free shag with someone elses wife/girlfriend/fuckbuddy...if they want to be on here..bring their own!!! Or at least be honest and admit wifey isn.t on the scene...

I am married and it says so on my profile.

some of us have good reasons for being on here that others wouldn't understand.

there are many reasons that people use to try and justify cheating, however none of them are good.

That is only in your opinion and unfortunately I have good reason to be

on here

Do you know what happens to women who have been molested by there brothers

when they were young!

why has that got anything to do with what I said???????

Think about it .

I have, its got absolutely nothing to do with what im talking about.

Reply privately (closed, thread got too big)