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What one piece of advice......

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By *emmefatale OP   Woman  over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

........ would you offer someone who was about to become intimate with you for the first time?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

"You may want to hold your nose"

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By *emmefatale OP   Woman  over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville


""You may want to hold your nose" "
Bloody hell, didn't expect the tone to be lowered this quickly.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


""You may want to hold your nose" Bloody hell, didn't expect the tone to be lowered this quickly. "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Don't talk just do it

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Lie back and think of England

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Giz a kiss

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By *emmefatale OP   Woman  over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville


"Lie back and think of England "
Thats a given...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Lie back and think of England Thats a given... "

Next piece of advice is now try to keep thinking of England. . Funny they never take that bit

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

don't expect a sandwich when your done

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

You may want to take sedatives before we start...

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By *emmefatale OP   Woman  over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville


"You may want to take sedatives before we start..."
Providing them with sunglasses if they are in your bedroom may be prudent.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Best piece of advice I've ever been given was off my dad...."Son, you know you've found the right one when you can fart in bed and not feel embarrassed"

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Don't laugh

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"You may want to take sedatives before we start...Providing them with sunglasses if they are in your bedroom may be prudent."

That would stop them reading the wallpaper!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I hope your fit enough to keep up

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By *emmefatale OP   Woman  over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville


"You may want to take sedatives before we start...Providing them with sunglasses if they are in your bedroom may be prudent.

That would stop them reading the wallpaper!"

Thats the general idea! DOH!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

"Does this smell of chloroform to you?"

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"You may want to take sedatives before we start...Providing them with sunglasses if they are in your bedroom may be prudent.

That would stop them reading the wallpaper!"

They'll need to read the wallpaper to keep themselves amused

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

If I start seizing (I have epilepsy) get your cock out my mouth.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"If I start seizing (I have epilepsy) get your cock out my mouth. "

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By *ohohoWoman  over a year ago

Up North

That I will have my tea with just milk no sugar afterwards. A nice chocolate biscuit wouldn't go amiss as well.

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By *irtyGirlWoman  over a year ago

Edinburgh

Touch my feet and your nuts are gonna hurt!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Stop struggling Bitch n it wont hurt so much

Gimp

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By *njamesMan  over a year ago

Swindon

Wake me up before you go go.....(isn't there a song in there somewhere)

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Fasten your seat belt, put your tray in the upright position, in case of a sudden loss of pressure oxygen masks will drop down from the ceiling, please put on adjust your own mask before helping others, in the event of a crash landing and the lights go out, strip lighting will guide you to the nearest exit which will be here, here and here, when you hear the word brace brace brace, put your head between your legs

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Lie back and think of England Thats a given... "

Not in Wales.

I'd like to lie back and think of Cerys Matthews.

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By *iamondsmiles.Woman  over a year ago

little house on the praire

Buy some earplugs

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By *inaTitzTV/TS  over a year ago

Titz Towers, North Notts

Don't pull my hair

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Lie back and think of England "

xx

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By *unky monkeyMan  over a year ago

in the night garden

Don't make eye contact unless instructed. Always say thank you and high five after orgasm.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"If I start seizing (I have epilepsy) get your cock out my mouth. "

Lol x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Don't make eye contact unless instructed. Always say thank you and high five after orgasm."

Haha niiice x

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By *rincealbertxMan  over a year ago

Germany


"If I start seizing (I have epilepsy) get your cock out my mouth. "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Fasten your seat belt, put your tray in the upright position, in case of a sudden loss of pressure oxygen masks will drop down from the ceiling, please put on adjust your own mask before helping others, in the event of a crash landing and the lights go out, strip lighting will guide you to the nearest exit which will be here, here and here, when you hear the word brace brace brace, put your head between your legs "

Oh my goodness I can't control the laughter!!!!! X

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Please sign this disclaimer, no need to read it first.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Wear waterproofs as it's likely to go off unannounced.

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By *rincealbertxMan  over a year ago

Germany


"Wear waterproofs as it's likely to go off unannounced. "

Haha. Wouldn't a snorkel suffice?

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By *ola.Woman  over a year ago

Just where I need to be.

It's ok my neighbours are deaf.

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