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Profile Translations
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Lets have some fun. Translate what people actually mean on their profiles.
I'm VWE - I'm actually average but the camera angle helps
Athletic - I went to the gym once
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
Been told I'm good looking - By my Mum
I love a good, hard shag - Won't do foreplay
Open-minded - I'll do anything for a shag
I'm happy to meet socially first - I won't stop pestering you for a shag all the way through the meet
Reliable - I never answer my phone/texts
No face pics because I have an important job - no face pics because I'm ugly |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Just come out of a relationship and up for fun - I'm not over him but I'm hoping you fucking me will help!
I'm clean and discrete - I bathed last night and will show the lads in work all your photos
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By *iewMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Angus & Findhorn |
I am genuine = honestly, I am, I promise I am, please, I won't let you down, I promise, please pick me, please... fat, thin, one eyed, no teeth any fucker will do... please... |
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"Just come out of a relationship and up for fun - I'm not over him but I'm hoping you fucking me will help!
I'm clean and discrete - I bathed last night and will show the lads in work all your photos
"
genuine lols as the yoof say |
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can occasionally accommodate = will sneak you in when the wife/husband/partner is at work
Loves to give prolonged oral = will poke tongue in general direction for about 30 seconds then jump up waving cock shouting "my turn" |
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"can occasionally accommodate = will sneak you in when the wife/husband/partner is at work
Loves to give prolonged oral = will poke tongue in general direction for about 30 seconds then jump up waving cock shouting "my turn""
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Im genuine unlike all the others....fuck it footies on and I can't be arsed to shave me arse crack and go out to meet anyone,ill watch porn and have a wank later |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"we are fuckbuds.... NO SINGLE GUYS EVER EVER EVER..
she is mine and I am not letting anyone else see her, play with her because she is all mine, mine I say MINE." |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Ha ha what a brilliant thread - not at all plagiarised from the one I posted 4 days ago lol.
http://m.fabswingers.com/forum/swingers/301243
I don't mind......enjoy.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Ha ha what a brilliant thread - not at all plagiarised from the one I posted 4 days ago lol.
http://m.fabswingers.com/forum/swingers/301243
I don't mind......enjoy.
"
Ive been here 6 yrs,ive probably posted in countless threads of the same subject |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Ha ha what a brilliant thread - not at all plagiarised from the one I posted 4 days ago lol.
http://m.fabswingers.com/forum/swingers/301243
I don't mind......enjoy.
"
I don't mind - but I still mentioned it.
Honestly. I didn't see your thread so apologies |
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By *adybee77Woman
over a year ago
MAMOBA, miles and miles of bugger all (Aberdeenshire) |
Can only meet daytimes - the electronic tag and curfew imposed in court hasn't run its course yet, so I need to be back at base before 9pm.
Genuine - I looked it up and it sounded good
professional - I worked 5 days in a row once!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Blimey.
Judging by all the posts on here.
I'm married
I'm a timewaster
I'm desperate
I don't answer messages
I will fuck anything with a pulse
I will only last 5 minutes
I got no hope
Fuck me I've got no hope meeting anyone ever again.
Argggg I've been found out.
Need to think about a changing my profile |
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Very friendly =
just needs any sex +
give them sex to STFU +
disconcertingly creepy to everyone +
looks ugly except when very close up +
never, ever see them in public, God help you +
has no actual friends +
so bored wanking +
prefers to move in within the week +
needs cheaper access to clubs, posing as couple
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By *igeiaWoman
over a year ago
Bristol |
See if we click = oh my God, you messaged back politely! Can we meet? Are you free tomorrow? What are you doing right now? Why haven't you got back to me when I messaged you half an hour ago and I can see you're online? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Does anyone want to translate my profile,
I don't mind a roasting "
"I like to chat and get to know people before meeting but I wont always start/continue a conversation so keep chatting to me "-im too good for you, but keep at it and I might come around after a few drinks.
" If it doesn't go any further then a social, A night out, Chatting, Female company, I will still have enjoyed myself and hopefully you will have too." - please go out with me. I have no friends and really want to have the girlfriend experience.
"Things i like,Oral (both)"- cock or pussy, I'm not fussy.
"(but like my age range its not set in stone)"- like I said, I'm not fussy.
xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Does anyone want to translate my profile,
I don't mind a roasting
"I like to chat and get to know people before meeting but I wont always start/continue a conversation so keep chatting to me "-im too good for you, but keep at it and I might come around after a few drinks.
" If it doesn't go any further then a social, A night out, Chatting, Female company, I will still have enjoyed myself and hopefully you will have too." - please go out with me. I have no friends and really want to have the girlfriend experience.
"Things i like,Oral (both)"- cock or pussy, I'm not fussy.
"(but like my age range its not set in stone)"- like I said, I'm not fussy.
xx"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Does anyone want to translate my profile,
I don't mind a roasting
Things I like...
Women I like (but not set in stone) = I'll also shag women I don't like."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm happy with the fab friends I've already made. Not looking to meet anyone else.
Translation:
I have no friends of any sort off fabswingers, not even the fab friends whose numbers I now have in my phone. Please bend over while I blow smoke up your ass! |
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Never any good at filling in these things (profiles) =
I've so many profiles I've lost count - never any success, but now trying desperately to draw anyone in with mystery. No imagination or attractive.
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Share a house with mates, can't accom =
married, in a religious order, doesn't live where claimed, in an open prison, sectioned under MHA, lives in squalor or featured on recent extreme hoarders, in an isolation infection ward unit, hated by neighbours so your life is in danger if you visited and already has dangerous reputation that locals would shout abuse for and frightened it would get known on fab. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"See if we click = oh my God, you messaged back politely! Can we meet? Are you free tomorrow? What are you doing right now? Why haven't you got back to me when I messaged you half an hour ago and I can see you're online?"
Haha.....
Want no strings fun - As long as it's just me.....any other guys and you can fuck off you slag! |
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