FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Thoughts please
Thoughts please
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I have just been speaking a woman on here and getting on well. She then notices on my profile that I have met a TV/TS and asks me if I'm into men. I say that I am predominantly straight completely straight acting and looking but am very open minded sexually and have had a couple experiences with men or TS. At this point she puts it quite bluntly "I can't fuck a man that had fucked another man"
So my question is would this be a problem for most of you ladies out there? Or should past encounters not be an issue? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Everyone has there own _iews. Did you know you can't give blood if you have fucked a man who has fucked another man?! Besides your profile should say bi curious |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Misleading profile as it states your straight.
Lots of "straight but really bi" message us & they tell us they don't put bi on their profile as it puts people off.
We are put off by staraight single guys lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have to agree with her im afraid , I wouldn't meet a bi-curious man even , he has to be straight all the way ....
Im sure she wasn't been judgemental it was probably a shock when she realised and read your profile again ...
We all like different things that's what makes the world go round .... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If people refuse to select the correct definition of sexual orientation they are the ones causing the problem...
Honest labelling stops these occurrences from happening......
People who repeatedly engage in same sex activity are not straight...
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If you say you're straight then say you had sex with a TV that would put me off too. Means you're not honest about your sexuality and that makes me think you're not honest about other things. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you say you're straight then say you had sex with a TV that would put me off too. Means you're not honest about your sexuality and that makes me think you're not honest about other things."
This... |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
"
So my question is would this be a problem for most of you ladies out there?"
To some, yes, to some, no
"Or should past encounters not be an issue?"
I don't think it's a matter of "should". What people should do is only what they are comfortable with.
It's like saying age is only a number and should it matter, or everyone is the same height lying down (not true btw) so should some people only want tall men, or we're all human so should anyone say no black/asian/white/yellow/blue.
It matters to some. Whether it should is a moot point. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
If people refuse to select the correct definition of sexual orientation they are the ones causing the problem...
Honest labelling stops these occurrences from happening......
People who repeatedly engage in same sex activity are not straight...
"
Yes just say it as it is. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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you have definitely caught the dredded ghey, swap your profile to bi/ bi curious then at least your being honest with yourself, if others don't like it then at least you are being honest |
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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago
South West London / Surrey |
"
So my question is would this be a problem for most of you ladies out there? Or should past encounters not be an issue?"
It doesn't bother me in the slightest...if I am attracted to someone then I am attracted to them.
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"I have just been speaking a woman on here and getting on well. She then notices on my profile that I have met a TV/TS and asks me if I'm into men. I say that I am predominantly straight completely straight acting and looking but am very open minded sexually and have had a couple experiences with men or TS. At this point she puts it quite bluntly "I can't fuck a man that had fucked another man"
So my question is would this be a problem for most of you ladies out there? Or should past encounters not be an issue?"
Some women won't meet bi guys.
Some women won't meet guys who have fucked a fat bird.
Some women won't meet guys who have fucked a woman they consider to have too many verifications.
Some women won't meet guys who emphasise 'NSA'.
So I wouldn't worry too much about it.
Me personally, I like experimental guys.... with the exception of guys who fuck gangbang barebackers... I just can't get passed that one. |
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By *adybee77Woman
over a year ago
MAMOBA, miles and miles of bugger all (Aberdeenshire) |
"Everyone has there own _iews. Did you know you can't give blood if you have fucked a man who has fucked another man?! Besides your profile should say bi curious"
This is my issue with it. Giving blood is an important thing for me, so its a no go. And yes I do ask... I also ask about other high risk behaviours. |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
the OP wont come back to the thread..... but Deception by Omission in my eyes is far far worse then just being truthful to the people you are potentially playing with....at least they are armed with the facts to make an informed decision
so if you are bi... which is sounds like you are... just admit it... rather than hiding behind something that isn't true.... because any potential partner could just hit the green arrow, look at this thread, and know you are lying! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Wow! So instead of changing your sexuality you just remove the TV verification? I'm sure the person in question will be pleased about that. Such a good impression of yourself you're putting forward |
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"If you say you're straight then say you had sex with a TV that would put me off too. Means you're not honest about your sexuality and that makes me think you're not honest about other things."
Well said
Ruby.
People's past doesn't bother me, but if you can't be on a site like here and be honest then I'd be wary personally |
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By *iewMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Angus & Findhorn |
I have declared my bisexuality since the day I entered the swinging world, it didn't impact my meets.
I just respected the people who didn't want to meet bisexual guys, it's cool with me.
good luck and welcome |
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By *LCoupleCouple
over a year ago
Norfolk |
"Did you know you can't give blood if you have fucked a man who has fucked another man?!"
I was not aware of that, mostly because I've got a phobia of needles and never given blood. Seems very homophobic to me though. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Did you know you can't give blood if you have fucked a man who has fucked another man?!
I was not aware of that, mostly because I've got a phobia of needles and never given blood. Seems very homophobic to me though."
it seems a daft reason to me as all blood is tested anyway, they don't take your word for it your clear of anything, they must turn down loads of perfectly good blood |
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By *adybee77Woman
over a year ago
MAMOBA, miles and miles of bugger all (Aberdeenshire) |
"Did you know you can't give blood if you have fucked a man who has fucked another man?!
I was not aware of that, mostly because I've got a phobia of needles and never given blood. Seems very homophobic to me though."
Would you say that if you got infected with a blood borne virus? Medical facts point to gay and bisexual men being in the high risk category, as well as people who have sex in some african countries etc. There is a list of high risk activity on the blood donor website.
Its listed as who can't give blood on the give blood website. |
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There are a range of _iews, as you've seen in this forum post, as well as probably from society at large. If you're not really attracted to guys then I'd class you as straight, even if at some point in the past you've experienced some form of interaction with guys. Does enjoying your cock rubbing against another whilst DPing a woman make you bi or curious - probably not, as it's a physical sensation that any guy's cock will enjoy the stimulation from.
If you've had some sex with a transgender woman, than I don't class this as bi or curious either.
It partly depends on what's deep in your unconscious self's desires. Sometimes this takes time to become clear to us, and others don't seem to appreciate this that well, when a gay guy or woman suddenly realises that they're actually largely straight, fairly late in life etc.
I'd only stick to labels for the convenience of others, where this fits you. Steer clear of anyone who is not likely to fit your needs, or anyone who may be abusive. You have one life to live, we change over time and our past experience is not conclusive indication of where we are at today or will be in future. |
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"There are a range of _iews, as you've seen in this forum post, as well as probably from society at large. If you're not really attracted to guys then I'd class you as straight, even if at some point in the past you've experienced some form of interaction with guys. Does enjoying your cock rubbing against another whilst DPing a woman make you bi or curious - probably not, as it's a physical sensation that any guy's cock will enjoy the stimulation from.
If you've had some sex with a transgender woman, than I don't class this as bi or curious either.
It partly depends on what's deep in your unconscious self's desires. Sometimes this takes time to become clear to us, and others don't seem to appreciate this that well, when a gay guy or woman suddenly realises that they're actually largely straight, fairly late in life etc.
I'd only stick to labels for the convenience of others, where this fits you. Steer clear of anyone who is not likely to fit your needs, or anyone who may be abusive. You have one life to live, we change over time and our past experience is not conclusive indication of where we are at today or will be in future."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So how many women know for certain they have never had sex with a man that has had sex with another man?
And how do you know?"
Exactly unless you are both virgins who dated from primary school onwards. |
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By *iewMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Angus & Findhorn |
"So how many women know for certain they have never had sex with a man that has had sex with another man?
And how do you know?"
to be fair they don't.
I have had sex with some of the people in swinging who are anti bi guys publically. It was in a club and I didn't know their profile and they didn't know mine |
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Once I fucked a guy who had fucked a woman, who had fucked a guy, who had fucked a woman, whose husband had fucked a woman whose boyfriend had sucked a cock in 1998.... so I made him double up on the condoms.
I am very thorough in my research of prospective meets.
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By *adybee77Woman
over a year ago
MAMOBA, miles and miles of bugger all (Aberdeenshire) |
"So how many women know for certain they have never had sex with a man that has had sex with another man?
And how do you know?"
You never know for definite, but you can go with gut feelings and questioning. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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NHS advice is to wait 12 months after having had sex with a man who has had sex with another man before giving blood.
It's not that you can never give blood, but if you suspect you are asked to wait 12 months to donate.
Wouldn't want anyone thinking they can never again give blood, reserves are much too low to be putting people off xx
Personally I don't mind meeting bi men, or men who have slept with tv/ts, as long as they're honest and unashamed of it! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Once I fucked a guy who had fucked a woman, who had fucked a guy, who had fucked a woman, whose husband had fucked a woman whose boyfriend had sucked a cock in 1998.... so I made him double up on the condoms.
I am very thorough in my research of prospective meets.
"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Once I fucked a guy who had fucked a woman, who had fucked a guy, who had fucked a woman, whose husband had fucked a woman whose boyfriend had sucked a cock in 1998.... so I made him double up on the condoms.
I am very thorough in my research of prospective meets.
"
Did he admit bi-tendencies? |
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By *LCoupleCouple
over a year ago
Norfolk |
"Did you know you can't give blood if you have fucked a man who has fucked another man?!
I was not aware of that, mostly because I've got a phobia of needles and never given blood. Seems very homophobic to me though.
Would you say that if you got infected with a blood borne virus? Medical facts point to gay and bisexual men being in the high risk category, as well as people who have sex in some african countries etc. There is a list of high risk activity on the blood donor website.
Its listed as who can't give blood on the give blood website."
Maybe but it still seems draconian to me. For example my last contact with another male was under 12 months ago but my last std tests were over 3 months after that and yet I am excluded. Wouldn't it make more sense to require everyone to fill out a form listing sexual encounters from the last clear std test, including what protection was used? |
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How does she know you fucked him? Might just have been cock sucking. I'm a bit bi and have people turn me down for being bi - I know this because they specifically said so - so I just concentrate on those who are bi or bifriendly. |
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As usual, I was too lazy to read everyone elses posts and leapt in. It's not the right thing to do to mis-describe yourself and it's disingenuous bordering on fraudulent to remove a veri from a TV to keep your straightness intact. It won't work though, as Fabio said. The green arrow of truth with prevail.
There's a lot of women and couples who like meeting bi men and it's sad you think you'll stand a better chance by pretending to be straight. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Everyone has there own _iews. Did you know you can't give blood if you have fucked a man who has fucked another man?! Besides your profile should say bi curious"
Can't if you've fucked someone who's been to Africa either. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Everyone has there own _iews. Did you know you can't give blood if you have fucked a man who has fucked another man?! Besides your profile should say bi curious
This is my issue with it. Giving blood is an important thing for me, so its a no go. And yes I do ask... I also ask about other high risk behaviours."
Such as swinging? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Did you know you can't give blood if you have fucked a man who has fucked another man?!
I was not aware of that, mostly because I've got a phobia of needles and never given blood. Seems very homophobic to me though.
Would you say that if you got infected with a blood borne virus? Medical facts point to gay and bisexual men being in the high risk category, as well as people who have sex in some african countries etc. There is a list of high risk activity on the blood donor website.
Its listed as who can't give blood on the give blood website."
Do people understand statistics? High risk category.... doesn't mean all straight men and all women are guaranteed std-free. It does my nut in. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have just been speaking a woman on here and getting on well. She then notices on my profile that I have met a TV/TS and asks me if I'm into men. I say that I am predominantly straight completely straight acting and looking but am very open minded sexually and have had a couple experiences with men or TS. At this point she puts it quite bluntly "I can't fuck a man that had fucked another man"
So my question is would this be a problem for most of you ladies out there? Or should past encounters not be an issue?"
I wouldn't be able to either. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have just been speaking a woman on here and getting on well. She then notices on my profile that I have met a TV/TS and asks me if I'm into men. I say that I am predominantly straight completely straight acting and looking but am very open minded sexually and have had a couple experiences with men or TS. At this point she puts it quite bluntly "I can't fuck a man that had fucked another man"
So my question is would this be a problem for most of you ladies out there? Or should past encounters not be an issue?"
Some people don't want to fuck a guy that has fucked another guy. It doesn't matter what their reasons are. Just respect them. |
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"
If people refuse to select the correct definition of sexual orientation they are the ones causing the problem...
Honest labelling stops these occurrences from happening......
People who repeatedly engage in same sex activity are not straight...
"
This! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have declared my bisexuality since the day I entered the swinging world, it didn't impact my meets.
I just respected the people who didn't want to meet bisexual guys, it's cool with me.
good luck and welcome"
As ever View you are wise and honest. We both love you to bits as you well know, and class you as a great friend. |
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Someone who has brushed and played with a transgender females tits, does that alter their orientation if they enjoyed it? Probably some users should demand full details of all sexual contact from the first, they are that needy to try to appreciate where someone is at. It takes all sorts. Avoid like the plague anyone who appears to conflict with where youre at. |
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"So how many women know for certain they have never had sex with a man that has had sex with another man?
And how do you know?"
I don't meet bi men for the same reason I don't meet married men: they don't meet my play needs. One or two have slipped pass the net but I've discovered the truth when play commenced.
They had the cheek to be surprised when I asked them to leave! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Everyone has there own _iews. Did you know you can't give blood if you have fucked a man who has fucked another man?! Besides your profile should say bi curious
This is my issue with it. Giving blood is an important thing for me, so its a no go. And yes I do ask... I also ask about other high risk behaviours."
Swinging IS a high risk behaviour. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Did you know you can't give blood if you have fucked a man who has fucked another man?!
I was not aware of that, mostly because I've got a phobia of needles and never given blood. Seems very homophobic to me though.
Would you say that if you got infected with a blood borne virus? Medical facts point to gay and bisexual men being in the high risk category, as well as people who have sex in some african countries etc. There is a list of high risk activity on the blood donor website.
Its listed as who can't give blood on the give blood website.
Do people understand statistics? High risk category.... doesn't mean all straight men and all women are guaranteed std-free. It does my nut in."
Example being most people with HIV are straight, most people who catch HIV catch it from straight sex between a man or a woman.
Also I'd be very very curious if the blood bank would let you give if you said you were a swinger. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Did you know you can't give blood if you have fucked a man who has fucked another man?!
I was not aware of that, mostly because I've got a phobia of needles and never given blood. Seems very homophobic to me though.
it seems a daft reason to me as all blood is tested anyway, they don't take your word for it your clear of anything, they must turn down loads of perfectly good blood"
They don't just turn anyone down. I had to answer a lot of questions to determine whether I can give blood or not. I then had to give permission for them to contact my gp and consultants. I found out yesterday after a 5month wait that I cannot give blood due to past treatment so being fair to them they don't just turn anyone away they do thorough checks first |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Did you know you can't give blood if you have fucked a man who has fucked another man?!
I was not aware of that, mostly because I've got a phobia of needles and never given blood. Seems very homophobic to me though.
it seems a daft reason to me as all blood is tested anyway, they don't take your word for it your clear of anything, they must turn down loads of perfectly good blood
They don't just turn anyone down. I had to answer a lot of questions to determine whether I can give blood or not. I then had to give permission for them to contact my gp and consultants. I found out yesterday after a 5month wait that I cannot give blood due to past treatment so being fair to them they don't just turn anyone away they do thorough checks first "
Really? They rocked up our side college a while ago and basically just gave everyone a small questionair then stuck em full of needles.
Rather worryingly quite a large number of steroid users from my work gave blood I did tell them not to go do it for obvious reasons but they did. So I really hope they check the blood or some women are gonna get fucked over by that one. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Did you know you can't give blood if you have fucked a man who has fucked another man?!
I was not aware of that, mostly because I've got a phobia of needles and never given blood. Seems very homophobic to me though.
it seems a daft reason to me as all blood is tested anyway, they don't take your word for it your clear of anything, they must turn down loads of perfectly good blood
They don't just turn anyone down. I had to answer a lot of questions to determine whether I can give blood or not. I then had to give permission for them to contact my gp and consultants. I found out yesterday after a 5month wait that I cannot give blood due to past treatment so being fair to them they don't just turn anyone away they do thorough checks first
Really? They rocked up our side college a while ago and basically just gave everyone a small questionair then stuck em full of needles.
Rather worryingly quite a large number of steroid users from my work gave blood I did tell them not to go do it for obvious reasons but they did. So I really hope they check the blood or some women are gonna get fucked over by that one. "
They will test the blood first. I didn't go to give blood though, I rang up to discuss whether I was acceptable as I know some treatments stop you from being able to give blood |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have just been speaking a woman on here and getting on well. She then notices on my profile that I have met a TV/TS and asks me if I'm into men. I say that I am predominantly straight completely straight acting and looking but am very open minded sexually and have had a couple experiences with men or TS. At this point she puts it quite bluntly "I can't fuck a man that had fucked another man"
So my question is would this be a problem for most of you ladies out there? Or should past encounters not be an issue?" ....I guess everybody has their own boundaries!..I myself,would not have any issue's with your past encounters..I personally see is as we all on here for fun.it's gotta be expected on a site like this!..but I guess each to there own!..there's plenty more & all that good luck x (fem) |
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