And digressing a little as this thread has me thinking about killer one-liners, only this is two killer lines…
My now ex-wife used to work at the same place as me. One afternoon she was having a bit of a tantrum and shouting her mouth off. Just after she’d left the room a male worker said, “I’m bloody glad I haven’t gotta got home to that!” so I said…
“She can get stroppy but I tell you what… she’s a better fuck than your misses!”
As he was reeling in the shock to what I had said, with what I think was perfect timing I followed up with… “And that’s not just my opinion!”  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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or..he had a face like a robbers dog!
now im on a roll,lol!
you've got a face like a ripped dap!
you're eyes look like piss holes in the snow!
sit still! you're up 'n down like a nuns knickers!
she's got a mouth like a chickens bum!
he's got a mouth like a cats arse!
her eyes were like rissoles in the sun!
dont pick your nose, your head will cave in!
my mum said all of these 'n more,lol!!
too many to remember..bless her.
Hx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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ive just remembered a few more of my mums' gems,lol!
who fluffed? someone smells like a rat crawled their bum 'n died!
look before you leap,you never know who's at the bottom!
if you dont ask you dont get!
my boss always says.. if shit was wit he'd be constipated!
Hx |
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he thinks foreplay is a pre school activity
and there one wave short of a shipwreck
she is an accident waiting to happen
if he walked into a field full of fannies , he,d come out with an asshole
two yorkshire men fixing a dry stone wall , and an awkward shaped bit wont fit back ....................
if it cum owt a tut wall itl go back intut wall |
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By *heWolfMan
over a year ago
warwickshire |
"You're all over the place, like the mad woman's shit"
"That fart came straight off the face of a turd"
"Jesus, who hasn't flushed the toilet? There's one in there sticking out like Hitler's arm"
Thanks for those scatological gems, grandma. I wish I'd known her, we'd have got on famously. |
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