We all make asses of ourselves every now and then, usually under the influence of something. What is your favorite story?
Here's mine. I was at a singles bar in Chicago, along with a few of my Professor friends. It was a really cold night. I was quite hammered after a few drinks. I was leaning my back against the table while waiting for my next drink. Suddenly, I feel this nice warm feeling on my back. It was a cold night and the warmth felt welcome. But then it got warmer. And warmer. And then I discovered my shirt was on fire. I was leaning against the table and there was a candle on it. Big gaping hole on the back of my shirt after I patted out the fire. But I was too plastered to care. I went to the dance floor and danced away, hole and everything.
My colleagues named me the Burning Man. I prefer to call myself hot. |
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By *hortieWoman
over a year ago
Northampton |
I can't think of any time I have been embarassed in public (wait, there was one time I fell off my pushbike when I tried to move from the road to the kerb lol)
One day my hubby came home from work early and caught me on the sofa playing with a carrot .. omg I CRINGED at the time hahaha - was all good though, he just picked me up carried me upstairs and threw me on the bed..
My worst though was an ex (this one is gross so stop reading now lol) he used to HATE me playing with toys. Anyway I was playing away one morning, then realised with horror I had forgotten I had a tampon in. Long story short, he helped to get it out, while looking thouroughly disgusted with me.  We didn't last long lmao |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I can't think of any time I have been embarassed in public (wait, there was one time I fell off my pushbike when I tried to move from the road to the kerb lol)
One day my hubby came home from work early and caught me on the sofa playing with a carrot .. omg I CRINGED at the time hahaha - was all good though, he just picked me up carried me upstairs and threw me on the bed..
My worst though was an ex (this one is gross so stop reading now lol) he used to HATE me playing with toys. Anyway I was playing away one morning, then realised with horror I had forgotten I had a tampon in. Long story short, he helped to get it out, while looking thouroughly disgusted with me. We didn't last long lmao"
I know I was warned but carried on reading . Ewwww   |
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"I can't think of any time I have been embarassed in public (wait, there was one time I fell off my pushbike when I tried to move from the road to the kerb lol)
One day my hubby came home from work early and caught me on the sofa playing with a carrot .. omg I CRINGED at the time hahaha - was all good though, he just picked me up carried me upstairs and threw me on the bed..
My worst though was an ex (this one is gross so stop reading now lol) he used to HATE me playing with toys. Anyway I was playing away one morning, then realised with horror I had forgotten I had a tampon in. Long story short, he helped to get it out, while looking thouroughly disgusted with me. We didn't last long lmao"
I have always believed the vag needs to be supplied with Vitamin A. I swear to you, they can see - sometimes I feel them winking at me
But yes, agree with Toshn - the second one is gross |
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By *hortieWoman
over a year ago
Northampton |
peeled cucumbers are AWESOME straight out of the fridge!! I like to believe it has a toning effect - like when chicks put cucumber slices on their eyes  (thats my excuse and I'm sticking to it) |
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