FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > baby wipes, bog roll or what?
baby wipes, bog roll or what?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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To wipe your bum? I was using baby wipes for a few years till they blocked the pipes...(the toilets, not mine;)) vile job to sort so no more wipes but i cant go back to just smearing it with dry paper. So now i use bog roll then perch on the edge of the bath and have a proper wash after. Cant bear the thought of a dirty bum... Needs to be spotless. You wouldn't wipe poo off anything else with just dry paper and call it a job done would you? Ergh! |
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"To wipe your bum? I was using baby wipes for a few years till they blocked the pipes...(the toilets, not mine;)) vile job to sort so no more wipes but i cant go back to just smearing it with dry paper. So now i use bog roll then perch on the edge of the bath and have a proper wash after. Cant bear the thought of a dirty bum... Needs to be spotless. You wouldn't wipe poo off anything else with just dry paper and call it a job done would you? Ergh!"
Buy some of the wet wipes designed for the job, flushable too. Or use your mates flannel  |
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As a female, I can't understand why we never adopted the bidet over here...
(Might be T.M.I, but) especially during "that time of month", I've always felt much cleaner abroad than I do here without having to shower after every trip to the toilet...
- Amy. x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"As a female, I can't understand why we never adopted the bidet over here...
(Might be T.M.I, but) especially during "that time of month", I've always felt much cleaner abroad than I do here without having to shower after every trip to the toilet...
- Amy. x"
I agree, I would love one 
Her |
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"As a female, I can't understand why we never adopted the bidet over here...
(Might be T.M.I, but) especially during "that time of month", I've always felt much cleaner abroad than I do here without having to shower after every trip to the toilet...
- Amy. xI agree, I would love one
Her"
I've never worked out how to use the damn things  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"As a female, I can't understand why we never adopted the bidet over here...
(Might be T.M.I, but) especially during "that time of month", I've always felt much cleaner abroad than I do here without having to shower after every trip to the toilet...
- Amy. xI agree, I would love one
Her
I've never worked out how to use the damn things "
Just sit and whoosh, fresh as a daisy |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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The wipes for flushing are twice the price though! And you still cant beat a proper wash
i like to be super clean... If that puts anyone off, and makes them not want to meet me good
i see people on these forums talking about smelling dirty pants so i don't think hygene should offend anyone  |
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"The wipes for flushing are twice the price though! And you still cant beat a proper wash
i like to be super clean... If that puts anyone off, and makes them not want to meet me good
i see people on these forums talking about smelling dirty pants so i don't think hygene should offend anyone "
not if you buy own brand. You could use normal loo roll but dampen it down.
I can't believe I'm actually discussing this |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The wipes for flushing are twice the price though! And you still cant beat a proper wash
i like to be super clean... If that puts anyone off, and makes them not want to meet me good
i see people on these forums talking about smelling dirty pants so i don't think hygene should offend anyone "
What happens if your taken short while out and about ? |
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"As a female, I can't understand why we never adopted the bidet over here...
(Might be T.M.I, but) especially during "that time of month", I've always felt much cleaner abroad than I do here without having to shower after every trip to the toilet...
- Amy. xI agree, I would love one
Her
I've never worked out how to use the damn things Just sit and whoosh, fresh as a daisy "
The ones I've seen have a tap that only whooshes downwards  , if it whooshed upwards I could understand |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It is customary in East Indian and Japanese abloution culture to wash one's bottom with clean water. Smearing is unacceptable and somewhat primitive .
There is nothing more repugnant than skid marks in one's Ralph Lauren silk shorties. You can't polish a turd . |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It is customary in East Indian and Japanese abloution culture to wash one's bottom with clean water. Smearing is unacceptable and somewhat primitive .
There is nothing more repugnant than skid marks in one's Ralph Lauren silk shorties. You can't polish a turd ."
exactly |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Get many meets?
says the guy with no meets  "
But now I know I'm supposed to wipe my arse I should get plenty. Thanks for your informative thread. I'm guessing your inundated with da ladies wanting to come check out your sparkly ring piece. Well Jel. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"how about keeping a spray bottle in the bathroom, squirt the offending area, then wipe away to your hearts content? "
bog roll disintegrates when wet so no |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Get many meets?
says the guy with no meets "
Ps. Mr Clean ring guy (as you are now known) where does it say I have no meets? Right off to jetwash my anus. Wish me luck. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Get many meets?
says the guy with no meets
Ps. Mr Clean ring guy (as you are now known) where does it say I have no meets? Right off to jetwash my anus. Wish me luck."
lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Get many meets?
says the guy with no meets
Ps. Mr Clean ring guy (as you are now known) where does it say I have no meets? Right off to jetwash my anus. Wish me luck.
lol "
Just to check. Shall I use the patio attachment or the one for tyres? Jeez I'm gonna be squeaky clean! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Get many meets?
says the guy with no meets
Ps. Mr Clean ring guy (as you are now known) where does it say I have no meets? Right off to jetwash my anus. Wish me luck.
lol
Just to check. Shall I use the patio attachment or the one for tyres? Jeez I'm gonna be squeaky clean!"
better still, oven pride  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Get many meets?
says the guy with no meets
Ps. Mr Clean ring guy (as you are now known) where does it say I have no meets? Right off to jetwash my anus. Wish me luck.
lol
Just to check. Shall I use the patio attachment or the one for tyres? Jeez I'm gonna be squeaky clean!
better still, oven pride "
Christ your hard core!! I am in awe of your spotless stinker!!! What about some Mr Muscle drain buster? Ouch my ring actually contracted at the thought of extreme chemicals down there lol. |
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"To wipe your bum? I was using baby wipes for a few years till they blocked the pipes...(the toilets, not mine;)) vile job to sort so no more wipes but i cant go back to just smearing it with dry paper. So now i use bog roll then perch on the edge of the bath and have a proper wash after. Cant bear the thought of a dirty bum... Needs to be spotless. You wouldn't wipe poo off anything else with just dry paper and call it a job done would you? Ergh!"
a) buy a bidet
b) don't put anything down the toilet that doesn't dissolve ... it will block up!! (tampons, condoms,cotton wool buds, dental floss, baby wipes, nappies etc)
c) cannot believe you put baby wipes down the loo
|
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"To wipe your bum? I was using baby wipes for a few years till they blocked the pipes...(the toilets, not mine;)) vile job to sort so no more wipes but i cant go back to just smearing it with dry paper. So now i use bog roll then perch on the edge of the bath and have a proper wash after. Cant bear the thought of a dirty bum... Needs to be spotless. You wouldn't wipe poo off anything else with just dry paper and call it a job done would you? Ergh!
a) buy a bidet
b) don't put anything down the toilet that doesn't dissolve ... it will block up!! (tampons, condoms,cotton wool buds, dental floss, baby wipes, nappies etc)
c) cannot believe you put baby wipes down the loo
"
clearing the drains taught me well not do it ever again... I was gagging  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"To wipe your bum? I was using baby wipes for a few years till they blocked the pipes...(the toilets, not mine;)) vile job to sort so no more wipes but i cant go back to just smearing it with dry paper. So now i use bog roll then perch on the edge of the bath and have a proper wash after. Cant bear the thought of a dirty bum... Needs to be spotless. You wouldn't wipe poo off anything else with just dry paper and call it a job done would you? Ergh!"
Get one of the bog brushes, instead of using it to cleans the bog use it on your sphincter, it might chaff but it will be spotless after wards, |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"
Get one of the bog brushes, "
sounds like you have a collection of them... I only have one and its for brushing the toilet... But i see what you did there. Good effort but me an others already smashed it with the whole OTT cleaning methods gags;) |
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I havent read the thread but a high fibre diet with plenty of veg too help produce thick, solid, satisfying stools which hit the water at a pace they turn the shit into a 'self wiper'.
It can turn a horrid Monday morning into a decent one when you give it the first wipe and its all clear, no marks.
You probably will leave skidders on the pan though so use the brush, there is a slight flip side with this diet, fuck atkins, fuck weigh watchers tell the girls at bingo 'Ive started the self wiper diet this week'. |
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By *D40Couple
over a year ago
Wolverhampton |
In Turkey & Tunisia loo roll does not get flushed, it goes in a bin at the side of the lavvy. Maybe you could wipe with tissue to get stubborn bits off, then wipe with a regular wipe and pop it in a nappy sack and out in the bin. No more disgusting than a pampers IMHO.
Julie |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"dont the wipes a bidets just leave you wet down there?
as for smearing issues using paper, i'd suggest your technique needs looking at  "
if you had shit on your face would you be happy with just bog roll to clean it off? I use bog roll to dry AFTER cleaning my bottom PROPERLY.
if you only use paper, you have dirty bum hole end of... That's not acceptable to me. |
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"dont the wipes a bidets just leave you wet down there?
as for smearing issues using paper, i'd suggest your technique needs looking at
if you had shit on your face would you be happy with just bog roll to clean it off? I use bog roll to dry AFTER cleaning my bottom PROPERLY.
if you only use paper, you have dirty bum hole end of... That's not acceptable to me."
never had any complaints |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You can get toilets that spray then blow dry, my disabled friend has one. Does feel a lil odd lol"
ok i must be tired - read that as dismantled friend - sorry |
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Whilst in Turkey recently, in my hotel room that wasadapted for disabled/wheelchair users, the toilet was already fitted with a pipe that squirted water up your poip shoot. Just pressed a button and voilà!!! Water was cold, so it was a bit of a shock to the system!!!
At home, I use Huggies baby wipes, then pop them in a nappy sack and into the bin. I even carry wipes out with me, as I've used them for that long, I just don't feel clean without them. |
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