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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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A beautiful woman walks into a doctor's office and the doctor is bowled off by how stunningly awesome she and his professionalism goes right through the window.
He tells her to take off her pants and starts rubbing her thigh, he asks her do you know what I'm doing? Yes she said, checking for abnormalities. He tell her to take off he bra and starts rubbing her boobs,he asks her do you know what I'm doing? Yes, she said checking for cancer. He tells her to take of her underwear and starts having sex. He tells her do you know what I'm doing? She said "Yes getting AIDS |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Man goes to doctors . Dr says I am sorry to inform you Mr Jones but you have syphilis .
No way !! Well I must of caught it off a toilet seat
Dr .. Well you must of eaten the bastud then cause its in yer gums |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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A man walks into a bar and sees a guy with a really big lighter. He asks the man, “Where did you get such a big lighter?”
The man replies,”See that man playing piano over there? He’s a genie and he’ll grant you one wish.”
So the guy walks over to the genie and says, “I wish for a million bucks.” All of a sudden the room fills up with a million ducks.
The man walks over to the guy with the lighter and says, “That genie is a little hard of hearing isn’t he.”
The guy replies, “No kidding! You think I asked for a 14 inch Bic!” |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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A guy goes into the confessional box after years being away from the Church. He pulls aside the curtain, enters and sits himself down.
There’s a fully equipped bar with crystal glasses, the best vestry wine, Guinness on tap, cigars and liqueur chocolates nearby, and on the wall a fine photographic display of various women who appear to have misplaced their garments.
He hears a priest come in. “Father, forgive me for it’s been a very long time since I’ve been to confession and I must admit that the confessional box is much more inviting than it used to be.”
The priest replies, “Get out, you idiot. You’re on my side!”
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a cleaners prayer...
give me this day my daily bread
give me strength before i go off my head
to stride forth and clean the loos
as the guys come in to do their number twos
and whether they shit or shat in the pot
give me strength as this is my lot
so as the guys wipe from front to back
as they clean their messy crack
guide me along the way
and get me thru another day .. |
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