Just looked at Facebook and saw my daughter's surname has changed to her mum's maiden name  . (me and mum split up in oct 2012)
Whilst technically I am her step father, she's always called me dad and up until this morning, used my surname for 12 years.
That's gutted me tbh |
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I'm sure she had her reasons & it's not that you're no longer loved but still, that's gonna hurt. I'm sorry dude. Sending you man hugs. Don't let it change your relationship with her, there is a lot of love there. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I had a step-father (who has sadly now passed on) my father had died when I was very young. So I never had the same surname as my step-father, I still loved him as a father figure in my life.
I understand why you're upset & it's a shame your ex didn't talk to you about it, but it's only a name. If in the future your daughter got married , she will most likely take her husband's surname.
A name doesn't change anyone's love for another.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So gutted you are on fab trying to figure it all out..
Bit harsh he can hardly write a status on facebook about it "
 I'm sure she doesn't love you any less, take her out for the day and talk to her, tell her it's ok and you understand but it would have been great if she had discussed it with you instead of you finding out on fb  |
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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago
Titz Towers, North Notts |
"I'm sure she doesn't love you any less, take her out for the day and talk to her, tell her it's ok and you understand but it would have been great if she had discussed it with you instead of you finding out on fb "
Sounds pretty good advice there.  |
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i get your grief. . but dont dwell on it and i wouldn't even make a point talking to her about it cause if she can do it without tellin you . .get me . .go ly doon and get some red hot Chile peppes on full blast and fuck them all . .let them come to you for change. . .peace and love bro. . everyone's different but works for me x X X |
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Spoke to her and it's because me and mum are seperated....
I ended conversation with "Well it's up to you... but you're still my little girl" and her reply "Aww I know I am "
But it's still a bit disheartening |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Spoke to her and it's because me and mum are seperated....
I ended conversation with "Well it's up to you... but you're still my little girl" and her reply "Aww I know I am "
But it's still a bit disheartening"
I'm gutted for you but I understand your daughter's thinking.
Your ex will find someone else who may or may not take to her child. Men come and go but her mum will be the constant in her life and the one who will put her first always.
I encouraged an ex to change her daughter's surname to her own. Made more sense in the long run as the prick doesn't even send so much as a birthday card.
She's not being spiteful to you, she's simply acknowledging the person who brought her into this world, nurtured her through it and will continue to do so. As will you.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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i didnt have a choice, i was 3 when given my step dads surname
when him and my mum split up she went back to her maiden name.. i still have his and feel a bit lost (if thats the right word)
my daughter has my surname. i feel happy that we are linked by name as well as the biology |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Just looked at Facebook and saw my daughter's surname has changed to her mum's maiden name . (me and mum split up in oct 2012)
Whilst technically I am her step father, she's always called me dad and up until this morning, used my surname for 12 years.
That's gutted me tbh"
Think on it as only a name change feelings both ways shouldn't change because of it. |
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