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Innuendos!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Sexual or non sexual... Have you heard any today!?

I just did!! And it was a classic!!

"Are you here to do me" I laughed so hard inside haha

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

The veggie man on the market earlier saying "I bet you could do with a large one " to a woman holding a large cauliflower out this morning.

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By *nigmatic1Woman over a year ago

A seaside town near you!

I was in Morrisons car park, roof off car and a guy asked how long it took me to get it up. I almost replied I don't have that problem so I suppose it depends how much you've had to drink...I refrained of course but drove off laughing to myself!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Hahahaha we all have dirty minds!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I just can't get enough.

It always brings a smile to my face.

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By *emmefataleWoman over a year ago

dirtybigbadsgirlville

In McDonalds once a guy serving me said "Do you want to go large?" I said "Why? Are you offering?"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Said to a woman in tescos "nice tan"

She replied "as soon as it's out I'm on it"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

some days i can put filth into anything -

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Said to a woman in tescos "nice tan"

She replied "as soon as it's out I'm on it"

that might have been me

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Just the word innuendo makes me smile, makes me think of anal sex

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Customers seem to always want something to nibble on. Is me offering them frankfurters wrong?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Said to a woman in tescos "nice tan"

She replied "as soon as it's out I'm on it"

that might have been me

I think she might be on here?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I overheard an elderly lady say to her friend on the bus 'I haven't felt myself for a while now'

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I say them all the time

I can't stop myself

I don't mean to I just find them in everything then I find everything hilarious

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"I say them all the time

I can't stop myself

I don't mean to I just find them in everything then I find everything hilarious "

me too

cant watch paul.n.mary without tears of laughter x soggy bottoms x stiff stir x white goo sliding down....x stiff peak....

Wilted......

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"In McDonalds once a guy serving me said "Do you want to go large?" I said "Why? Are you offering?""
hahahahaha!!!

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I overheard an elderly lady say to her friend on the bus 'I haven't felt myself for a while now'

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I had a friend who was doing some dressmaking. She walked into this department store and asked the young male assistant in a clear voice "Excuse me, can you tell me where I can get felt?"

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"I had a friend who was doing some dressmaking. She walked into this department store and asked the young male assistant in a clear voice "Excuse me, can you tell me where I can get felt?"

"
hehe

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By *ittle_brat_evie!!Woman over a year ago

evesham

"Just the word innuendo makes me smile, makes me think of anal sex "

In your endo!!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

My mate is a bugger for this.

A barmaid at an event he was attending mentioned it to the organiser, who then passed on her comments to my mate.

His response : I don't know what she's on about. I mean I might 'slip one in' every now and then, but ...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

I work shifts in a pub and we have a vegetarian tart and I always go to the table with 'who's is the tart?' does make everyone laugh

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Girl walks up in to cocktail bar and asks for a double entendre, so the barman gives her one!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Just the word innuendo makes me smile, makes me think of anal sex

In your endo!!!

Got it in one!!!!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 20/04/14 11:55:11]

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

My daily conversation is like the script for a carry on film ..just the way my mind works but my best was genuinely unintentional. One rainy morning I asked a builder who'd come to the counter with his pasty and magazine "would you like a bag to keep your nuts dry? " gnaarrrfff

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

If the OP is up for it, I will give her one anytime she likes

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Watching the F1 earlier & Brundle said " Lewis is out front stroking it off"

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

My mind is that warped, i can get rude things out of the Tweenies

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By *andybeachWoman over a year ago

In the middle

When we had guinea pigs their food was called "Gertie", my ex asked the lady in the pet shop if she "had a big Gertie" as there were only little ones one the shelf

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"some days i can put filth into anything -

Would that be an innuendo by any chance?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"My mind is that warped, i can get rude things out of the Tweenies

Those filthy writers should stop putting rude things in the Tweenies.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

A woman said to me you smell nice what have you got on, I said a hard on im surprised you can smell it lol

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

"A woman said to me you smell nice what have you got on, I said a hard on im surprised you can smell it lol"
hahahahaha

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Planted a Rose bush in my front garden and when my gardener came to cut the grass I asked 'could you have a look at my bush please'

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By *isalikesitWoman over a year ago

nottingham

At a bbq once and my mother shouted up the garden to my hubby "would you like cream on your plums" still makes us titter now.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Was discussing car specs with a customer and was mentioning an upgrade with 19in compared to the 18in wheels on the other spec...His reply of 'yeah but what's am inch between friends' made us both chuckle. And that's just one of many...I can find filth quite easily

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Was walking down our road once and a lady i know well was strimming her drive way. She stopped to chat as I left I said " Its lovely to see a lady with a neatly trimmed entrance " Her face was a picture !!

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Watching the F1 earlier & Brundle said " Lewis is out front stroking it off""

They're always 'coming together' in F1 too...

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

A woman on one of the home renovation programmes on tv once said she was having terrible problems with her crack

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By *opping_candyWoman over a year ago

West Yorkshire

A friend had a knee op the other week and a mutual friend on Facebook posted to say how he hoped she'd be feeling herself again soon