FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > When you have organised a meet....
When you have organised a meet....
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I always wonder what would you tell the back up meet? That you may be free and expect them to wait for a call?
I know I wouldn't be sat waiting for a call on the offchance,id be sorting my own night out |
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I'd not have a plan B shag lined up, as having second best is not something I'd be excited about, and it would also be stringing someone along, on the offchance they'd get a meet.
Also, I like to meet someone for who they are, and what we're going to do together - this may be quite different, person to person, so a stand in would also be a different experience. When I want beef, pork won't do.
But, I'd be definitely thinking about how my time would be spent - there are always more things to do, than time allows, so wouldn't be bored or at a loose end.
Good selection of people to meet is key to having a low failure rate. Life happens, and as someone else said, depending on time of day, there are venues to visit, if some sexual pleasure needed. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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That's why meet at a club type of meets work for me - if the intended meet does not turn up or there is no attraction - plenty of others at the club as back up  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No. I meet a man because I like him not because I want sex on a particular day I'm free"
exactly this ^^
my backup would be extra free time for me to enjoy. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have never had a back up because if I arrange to meet someone its because I really want to see them ,if they can't make it then I his arrange for another time thankfully doesn't happen often and only when if couldn't be helped  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Nope, we arrange to meet people because we like their attitude, A backup would always be disrespectful Why do you view it as disrespectful?"
Because they are backup ? me personally would hate to think that a couple were arranging to meet us as second choice if their first didnt pan out
Gary |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No. I meet a man because I like him not because I want sex on a particular day I'm free"
^^^^ this. I dont meet very often anyway but I'd never consider having a back up plan. |
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By *emmefatale OP Woman
over a year ago
dirtybigbadsgirlville |
"Nope, we arrange to meet people because we like their attitude, A backup would always be disrespectful Why do you view it as disrespectful?
Because they are backup ? me personally would hate to think that a couple were arranging to meet us as second choice if their first didnt pan out
Gary"
Interesting....thanks xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No because other people might not respect people and willingly let me down but I do and wouldn't like be someones back up plan or second best so wouldn't put anyone else in that position.
However, I have in the past been let down early in the day, posted for a replacement and been lucky enough to have a suitable guy step up. Infact was left feeling glad the bottler let me down  |
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By *emmefatale OP Woman
over a year ago
dirtybigbadsgirlville |
"No because other people might not respect people and willingly let me down but I do and wouldn't like be someones back up plan or second best so wouldn't put anyone else in that position.
However, I have in the past been let down early in the day, posted for a replacement and been lucky enough to have a suitable guy step up. Infact was left feeling glad the bottler let me down "
Second best? So if it happens you were a back up plan and you met fucked each others brains out and had a jolly good time, then later you found out you were "back up" would you be hurt? |
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By *emmefatale OP Woman
over a year ago
dirtybigbadsgirlville |
"So has no one who has said no they wouldn't have a back up plan, never had a booty call?
We have a meet on Saturday, can we give you a shout about 9pm if it goes tits up "
We have alternative arrangements.....but maybe if ours plans fall through we could swap numbers?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So has no one who has said no they wouldn't have a back up plan, never had a booty call?"
Not for me......unless ......can hubby be a back up plan or booty call??  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I made a booty call once,well a booty message on here,was sorting it out so I logged off here switched to text as I thought it would be easier,got no reply so thought he'd changed his mind,he saw Id logged off and thought id changed my mind,turns out the number I text was his swing phone which he didn't have with him
He sent his real number asap after that cock up.....or lack of cock up |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So has no one who has said no they wouldn't have a back up plan, never had a booty call?"
me being the booty? I wouldn't know about from here but I don't generally meet at short notice. Might have been let down by someone who had found someone more attractive than me though. Who knows |
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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago
Titz Towers, North Notts |
I try to organise things so that if it doesn't work out I have something else in mind. Ie, arrange to meet a chap at a club, pub or dogging. That way I have a good night regardless. |
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By *emmefatale OP Woman
over a year ago
dirtybigbadsgirlville |
"So has no one who has said no they wouldn't have a back up plan, never had a booty call?
Not for me......unless ......can hubby be a back up plan or booty call?? "
Yes he could.....or your meets are back up plans whichever you want to look at it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So has no one who has said no they wouldn't have a back up plan, never had a booty call?"
Heres the thing, and im speaking as the male half here.
When i have been interested in a woman in the past its been about that person and not getting my legover and now as part of a couple it takes even more effort to find people that we think we will both get on with but at the end of the day if its a no show we still have each others company |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So has no one who has said no they wouldn't have a back up plan, never had a booty call?"
I've never had a back up plan in place, and wouldn't ever keep someone in the background just in case I had a no show, however I have before now texted a fb/regular meet after being let down to see if they were free last minute. That way if they're at a loose end it's a win win! |
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By *emmefatale OP Woman
over a year ago
dirtybigbadsgirlville |
"So has no one who has said no they wouldn't have a back up plan, never had a booty call?
I've never had a back up plan in place, and wouldn't ever keep someone in the background just in case I had a no show, however I have before now texted a fb/regular meet after being let down to see if they were free last minute. That way if they're at a loose end it's a win win!"
Thats a back up plan!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No would not try to arrange anything else in case it fell through.
I would either crack on with some work or go to the gym early and work out my frustrations |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No. I meet a man because I like him not because I want sex on a particular day I'm free"
This for me too, I have that guy in my mind & another won't fit lol, I just get on & do other stuff if it's a no show, luckily doesn't happen often x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"...do you organise another"back up" meet, just in case you get let down?"
Yes and I really don't see a problem with it it works both ways and lets face it in general swinging is NSA fun. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So has no one who has said no they wouldn't have a back up plan, never had a booty call?
I've never had a back up plan in place, and wouldn't ever keep someone in the background just in case I had a no show, however I have before now texted a fb/regular meet after being let down to see if they were free last minute. That way if they're at a loose end it's a win win!Thats a back up plan! "
That's not really a plan though is it... it's an afterthought! If they were busy I'd probably just clean or catch up on sky plus, but luckily so far is never been much of an issue |
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By *emmefatale OP Woman
over a year ago
dirtybigbadsgirlville |
"So has no one who has said no they wouldn't have a back up plan, never had a booty call?
I've never had a back up plan in place, and wouldn't ever keep someone in the background just in case I had a no show, however I have before now texted a fb/regular meet after being let down to see if they were free last minute. That way if they're at a loose end it's a win win!Thats a back up plan!
That's not really a plan though is it... it's an afterthought! If they were busy I'd probably just clean or catch up on sky plus, but luckily so far is never been much of an issue "
You can dress it up how you like, its a back up plan to me  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No because other people might not respect people and willingly let me down but I do and wouldn't like be someones back up plan or second best so wouldn't put anyone else in that position.
However, I have in the past been let down early in the day, posted for a replacement and been lucky enough to have a suitable guy step up. Infact was left feeling glad the bottler let me down Second best? So if it happens you were a back up plan and you met fucked each others brains out and had a jolly good time, then later you found out you were "back up" would you be hurt?"
Unlikely to happen as I don't respond to last minute meet requests but I'd not be too impressed.
Depends on the circumstances too though. |
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By *emmefatale OP Woman
over a year ago
dirtybigbadsgirlville |
"No because other people might not respect people and willingly let me down but I do and wouldn't like be someones back up plan or second best so wouldn't put anyone else in that position.
However, I have in the past been let down early in the day, posted for a replacement and been lucky enough to have a suitable guy step up. Infact was left feeling glad the bottler let me down Second best? So if it happens you were a back up plan and you met fucked each others brains out and had a jolly good time, then later you found out you were "back up" would you be hurt?
Unlikely to happen as I don't respond to last minute meet requests but I'd not be too impressed.
Depends on the circumstances too though. "
Someone you have met before? Last minute..yeah ok lets do it kinda thing.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No because other people might not respect people and willingly let me down but I do and wouldn't like be someones back up plan or second best so wouldn't put anyone else in that position.
However, I have in the past been let down early in the day, posted for a replacement and been lucky enough to have a suitable guy step up. Infact was left feeling glad the bottler let me down Second best? So if it happens you were a back up plan and you met fucked each others brains out and had a jolly good time, then later you found out you were "back up" would you be hurt?
Unlikely to happen as I don't respond to last minute meet requests but I'd not be too impressed.
Depends on the circumstances too though. Someone you have met before? Last minute..yeah ok lets do it kinda thing...."
If I had a message from a guy I had never chatted to or similar early in the day saying he had been let down and did I fancy a drink I'd possibly go for that based on his honesty.
Takes me 2 hours to get ready so even those I have met before would be lucky. I like to plan a day or so in advance. |
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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago
Scotland - Aberdeen |
"No, never have and never would! I think it is rather crass to be honest  Why?"
Why? I'd imagine you'd have to say I already have plans, but will look you up if they fall through! If someone said that to me? I'd tell them to do one and bloody block! respect is everything to me! And I will not change! |
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By *emmefatale OP Woman
over a year ago
dirtybigbadsgirlville |
"No, never have and never would! I think it is rather crass to be honest Why?
Why? I'd imagine you'd have to say I already have plans, but will look you up if they fall through! If someone said that to me? I'd tell them to do one and bloody block! respect is everything to me! And I will not change! "
I am not asking you to change, but everyone is different, honest or dishonest opinions are always welcome, I can see why you would choose not to take up an offer like that, I doubt many would, but if a mutual agreement had been made between both parties, its a different kettle of fish.
People always put things in one extreme or another, but I think lots of people have been back up plans without realising it, but its an interesting debate, thank you. x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Why do people assume a backup plan is a stranger? In most cases with people who are honest not saying things because they perceive "X" should be the right answer when a plan goes tits up that are philosophical over it put it down to one of those things phone a FB up and tell them they are horny and a bit fed up. Is that disrespectful? Is it fuck that's having a mate be it a FB they can rely on to cheer them up that's a good friend that is and you can have a chill out and a laugh with no expectations! I am beginning to wonder If Im the only one with real mates reading some of this.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So has no one who has said no they wouldn't have a back up plan, never had a booty call?
I've never had a back up plan in place, and wouldn't ever keep someone in the background just in case I had a no show, however I have before now texted a fb/regular meet after being let down to see if they were free last minute. That way if they're at a loose end it's a win win!Thats a back up plan!
That's not really a plan though is it... it's an afterthought! If they were busy I'd probably just clean or catch up on sky plus, but luckily so far is never been much of an issue You can dress it up how you like, its a back up plan to me "
Surely a plan is a plan... Whereas a spontaneous last minute call to someone else, after being let down, was never the plan...???  |
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We never have a plan b in place partly because as a couple we can make our own entertainment and partly because the way we get to know people means it wouldn't really be possible. However if the way you play allows for a back up I really can't see a problem it is no strings after all......isn't it? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Now I've thought about it I do have a couple of friends that will often message on the off chance that I'm free and I have been known to say that I'm meant to be meeting someone but if that didn't happen then I'm free to meet them. Never really thought of it as a back up plan but I guess it is!.....and if that fails there's always hubby |
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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago
Titz Towers, North Notts |
"Does a and wonders if there are any legs in a telly show called 'when innocuous threads go wrong.' Why has it gone wrong? "
I may be wrong, but I thought it was a general light hearted question and I think a few peeps have possibly read deeper into it. |
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By *emmefatale OP Woman
over a year ago
dirtybigbadsgirlville |
"We never have a plan b in place partly because as a couple we can make our own entertainment and partly because the way we get to know people means it wouldn't really be possible. However if the way you play allows for a back up I really can't see a problem it is no strings after all......isn't it?"
Not with everyone, it appears. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Now I've thought about it I do have a couple of friends that will often message on the off chance that I'm free and I have been known to say that I'm meant to be meeting someone but if that didn't happen then I'm free to meet them. Never really thought of it as a back up plan but I guess it is!.....and if that fails there's always hubby "
Now that's a backup plan your back up is always someone you can rely on and they know the score it works both ways so if it goes tits up near zero hour you can call them and enjoy their company. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Well, usually when people speak to me about a meet not turning up (usually with a bit of drama involved) and they feel as though they have been second choice - i usually tell them why would you be someone's second choice whilst you can be another's first?
...but, this is a bit of a pickle to be honest. Because even if you are someone's back up. You're still indirectly their first choice, as they've chosen you over another to be their 'knight in shining armour' if it all goes pear shaped.
I don't think many men would complain about being a back up - c'mon if someone calls you round for a fuck, and you're not doing anything. You're telling me you're going to turn it down?
Now, from experience with what many have said to me. If a man was to call someone round as a back up - they think to themselves as being 'used' for sex. Now, i'm not trying to generalise but it's all swings and roundabouts this back up business.
Don't think anyone would really mind to be honest - you still get a fuck out of it at least if you're really horny and your needs need seeing to.
 |
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By *inaTitzTV/TS
over a year ago
Titz Towers, North Notts |
"Does a and wonders if there are any legs in a telly show called 'when innocuous threads go wrong.' Why has it gone wrong?
I may be wrong, but I thought it was a general light hearted question and I think a few peeps have possibly read deeper into it. Well I always like to let things evolve, I always believe you get to know posters better that way."
Damn right
It's amazing what people post at times. There are some contentious threads, where you can almost see people hitting the block button  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Does a and wonders if there are any legs in a telly show called 'when innocuous threads go wrong.' Why has it gone wrong?
I may be wrong, but I thought it was a general light hearted question and I think a few peeps have possibly read deeper into it. Well I always like to let things evolve, I always believe you get to know posters better that way.
Damn right
It's amazing what people post at times. There are some contentious threads, where you can almost see people hitting the block button "
 those are the threads I never post on, just sit back and read lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have had men ask if they can meet me before or after I've met my arranged man or said if he cancels to let them know And have you felt that's disrespectful to your arranged meet?"
I wouldn't meet a regular friend before someone new on the same day. I'd want to be fresh for the new man |
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By *emmefatale OP Woman
over a year ago
dirtybigbadsgirlville |
"I have had men ask if they can meet me before or after I've met my arranged man or said if he cancels to let them know And have you felt that's disrespectful to your arranged meet?
I wouldn't meet a regular friend before someone new on the same day. I'd want to be fresh for the new man "
Fair enough but if you did...? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have had men ask if they can meet me before or after I've met my arranged man or said if he cancels to let them know And have you felt that's disrespectful to your arranged meet?
I wouldn't meet a regular friend before someone new on the same day. I'd want to be fresh for the new man Fair enough but if you did...?"
Theoretically speaking I would tell him first and have a good scrub in between |
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By *emmefatale OP Woman
over a year ago
dirtybigbadsgirlville |
"I have had men ask if they can meet me before or after I've met my arranged man or said if he cancels to let them know And have you felt that's disrespectful to your arranged meet?
I wouldn't meet a regular friend before someone new on the same day. I'd want to be fresh for the new man Fair enough but if you did...?
Theoretically speaking I would tell him first and have a good scrub in between "
Hahahaha. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think Femme's backup would be Marmite. Because it's orgasmic.
Backed up by Pickled Onion Monster Munch "
Oh gawwd!!
...good thing i like your heels to keep my senses occupied. Otherwise the sense of smell overload would destroy me 
But, on a serious note. Wouldn't you have a backup in cases of a 'quick meet' as opposed to long ones or all nighters? I haven't had a quickie yet, so can't really comment on that.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No, I wouldn't know how to put that to someone about being our back up without sounding rude.
I always meet local and we say if they don't turn up then at least we can have a drink together while we have the baby sitter at home.
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By *emmefatale OP Woman
over a year ago
dirtybigbadsgirlville |
"I think Femme's backup would be Marmite. Because it's orgasmic.
Backed up by Pickled Onion Monster Munch
Oh gawwd!!
...good thing i like your heels to keep my senses occupied. Otherwise the sense of smell overload would destroy me
But, on a serious note. Wouldn't you have a backup in cases of a 'quick meet' as opposed to long ones or all nighters? I haven't had a quickie yet, so can't really comment on that.
"
When I was meeting as a single femme, I nearly always had a back up..... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"No because other people might not respect people and willingly let me down but I do and wouldn't like be someones back up plan or second best so wouldn't put anyone else in that position.
However, I have in the past been let down early in the day, posted for a replacement and been lucky enough to have a suitable guy step up. Infact was left feeling glad the bottler let me down Second best? So if it happens you were a back up plan and you met fucked each others brains out and had a jolly good time, then later you found out you were "back up" would you be hurt?
Unlikely to happen as I don't respond to last minute meet requests but I'd not be too impressed.
Depends on the circumstances too though. "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think Femme's backup would be Marmite. Because it's orgasmic.
Backed up by Pickled Onion Monster Munch
Oh gawwd!!
...good thing i like your heels to keep my senses occupied. Otherwise the sense of smell overload would destroy me
But, on a serious note. Wouldn't you have a backup in cases of a 'quick meet' as opposed to long ones or all nighters? I haven't had a quickie yet, so can't really comment on that.
"
Quickies aren't very nice |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Nope.
If we set summat up, we follow it thru to the point of meeting.
If it doesn't happen, we are more than happy to just shag each other.
Same end result |
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"...do you organise another"back up" meet, just in case you get let down?"
No! Social meets were always held during my lunchtime, meeting outside Marks where I was going for a sarnie anyway: outside Costas in the station at 5.15, my train was at 5.27 so if they don't turn up I was going home anyway.
Play meets were arranged for days I'd be working from home, had planned to sort my knickers drawer etc. |
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"...do you organise another"back up" meet, just in case you get let down?"
Yep. At different times. Fuck plan A if he shows. Fuck plan B if he shows. Cast the dice and take my chances for either a sexless day or a very sexy day indeed! |
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I've never made a back-up plan in advance, but I'll certainly give someone else a call if a meet starts messing me about over arrangements, I do NOT like being messed about, gets my dander up!
Actually thinking about it I've had some great meets that way.....
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"I've never made a back-up plan in advance, but I'll certainly give someone else a call if a meet starts messing me about over arrangements, I do NOT like being messed about, gets my dander up!
Actually thinking about it I've had some great meets that way.....
"
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