FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > W fucking H Smiths again ...
W fucking H Smiths again ...
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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WH Smiths in T 1 heathrow didn't have any newspapers this morning !!! I mean FFS , there a newsagent ???? But they had plenty of cadburys fucking cream eggs, One Direction Calendars, and bloody wanky mugs with poxy comments on that arnt even funny didn't they .......just what you need to pass the time on an hours flight ??? Wrong !! WHS you pricks , people want a newspaper !!! And if you ask to scan my boarding card one more time I will set you on fucking fire . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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And breath......in through the nose nice and slowly......and release through the mouth....repeat several times until calmness returns 
Alternatively open a bottle of wine  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Why would WHSmiths scan your boarding card?"
EXACTLY !!! Well I will tell you why , they try piggy back on the duty free purchase requirement, but it's purely to get your details for there wank market research ........Which clearly doesn't work because they would see guys like us want to BUY A FUCKING PAPER IN THE MORNING ......OK ! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Top notch ranting.....yet again I've pissed in my crotchless knickers.
Is this the male or the female saying this?...  "
Always the lady, the gent has more sense than to get involved in this.
He's posted twice, both times about other ladies thigh- high boots lol. |
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"Why would WHSmiths scan your boarding card?"
Every time you buy something air side ... have to scan the boarding card ...even if you are buying a newspaper (if they had any) or a packet of mints in WHS! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Why would WHSmiths scan your boarding card?
Every time you buy something air side ... have to scan the boarding card ...even if you are buying a newspaper (if they had any) or a packet of mints in WHS!"
WHY ??? tell me ?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why would WHSmiths scan your boarding card?
EXACTLY !!! Well I will tell you why , they try piggy back on the duty free purchase requirement, but it's purely to get your details for there wank market research ........Which clearly doesn't work because they would see guys like us want to BUY A FUCKING PAPER IN THE MORNING ......OK ! "
I you actually pissed off?...
You get one go on this planet.
here's me worrying about kids in Africa with flies all over their heads. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Might I make a simple suggestion OP. You might think it's odd and way out but why don't you buy a paper before you get to the airport? You seem to get your knickers in a twist about the WHSmith at T1  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Might I make a simple suggestion OP. You might think it's odd and way out but why don't you buy a paper before you get to the airport? You seem to get your knickers in a twist about the WHSmith at T1 "
Thanks for that shite suggestion . Perhaps the next time I plan to go to Tescos , I go to Asda first in case Tesco don't have what I want !!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Might I make a simple suggestion OP. You might think it's odd and way out but why don't you buy a paper before you get to the airport? You seem to get your knickers in a twist about the WHSmith at T1
Thanks for that shite suggestion . Perhaps the next time I plan to go to Tescos , I go to Asda first in case Tesco don't have what I want !!!! "
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Might I make a simple suggestion OP. You might think it's odd and way out but why don't you buy a paper before you get to the airport? You seem to get your knickers in a twist about the WHSmith at T1
Thanks for that shite suggestion . Perhaps the next time I plan to go to Tescos , I go to Asda first in case Tesco don't have what I want !!!! "
Fine suit yourself!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Might I make a simple suggestion OP. You might think it's odd and way out but why don't you buy a paper before you get to the airport? You seem to get your knickers in a twist about the WHSmith at T1 "
Yeah but it's a fertile stomping ground for humorous strops!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Might I make a simple suggestion OP. You might think it's odd and way out but why don't you buy a paper before you get to the airport? You seem to get your knickers in a twist about the WHSmith at T1
Thanks for that shite suggestion . Perhaps the next time I plan to go to Tescos , I go to Asda first in case Tesco don't have what I want !!!! "
For more shite suggestions might I suggest the 'sit or stand' threadthread |
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"Why would WHSmiths scan your boarding card?
Every time you buy something air side ... have to scan the boarding card ...even if you are buying a newspaper (if they had any) or a packet of mints in WHS!
WHY ??? tell me ? "
So they know what you've bought (security!) and to check that you are allowed to buy it for the destination you are going to...
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why would WHSmiths scan your boarding card?
Every time you buy something air side ... have to scan the boarding card ...even if you are buying a newspaper (if they had any) or a packet of mints in WHS!
WHY ??? tell me ?
So they know what you've bought (security!) and to check that you are allowed to buy it for the destination you are going to...
"
Does whsmitb sell contraband...
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why would WHSmiths scan your boarding card?"
They always do at the airport. You need to scan your boarding card to buy a cadburys cream egg. It is case you are a terrorist. Cream eggs can be truly fukin deadly |
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My friend works there. I told him to make sure there was no papers out by the time you arrived. He knew what time you'd be arriving as he makes the effort to scan your boarding pass every time you pop in just to waste more precious minutes of your time.
My plan has worked. Mwahahaha.
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Newspaper????? How very quaint and last century.... a more forward thinking and tech savvy traveller would use their device to find out what is happening locally nationally and globally as it happens rather than at least 24 hours old |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"My friend works there. I told him to make sure there was no papers out by the time you arrived. He knew what time you'd be arriving as he makes the effort to scan your boarding pass every time you pop in just to waste more precious minutes of your time.
My plan has worked. Mwahahaha.
Oh I know her , shes the one that told me her friend needs a good hard shagging
"
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"How come no one picked up on the wanky mugs bit. Hilarious!"
Yeah !!! All those shit mugs with "world best mum" "worlds best cook" . No mugs there with "worlds best fuckin retailer " are there ??? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"How come no one picked up on the wanky mugs bit. Hilarious!
Yeah !!! All those shit mugs with "world best mum" "worlds best cook" . No mugs there with "worlds best fuckin retailer " are there ???"
 |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"How come no one picked up on the wanky mugs bit. Hilarious!
Yeah !!! All those shit mugs with "world best mum" "worlds best cook" . No mugs there with "worlds best fuckin retailer " are there ??? "
They're not allowed to retail fucking.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I wonder......
how many Cadburys Cream Eggs do you reckon you could eat on an hours flight?
You know if you were bored, no paper to read.... "
Watch it you ! Or I'll spank your ass |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wonder......
how many Cadburys Cream Eggs do you reckon you could eat on an hours flight?
You know if you were bored, no paper to read.... "
not sure but I managed to fit 3 in my mouth in one go today..another proud achievement  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I wonder......
how many Cadburys Cream Eggs do you reckon you could eat on an hours flight?
You know if you were bored, no paper to read....
not sure but I managed to fit 3 in my mouth in one go today..another proud achievement "
All that cream spilling out your mouth onto your chin ........disgusting  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wonder......
how many Cadburys Cream Eggs do you reckon you could eat on an hours flight?
You know if you were bored, no paper to read....
not sure but I managed to fit 3 in my mouth in one go today..another proud achievement "
3, I'm impressed
next forum challenge maybe ~ how many cream eggs can u fit in your mouth photo....!! |
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"!!! And if you ask to scan my boarding card one more time I will set you on fucking fire . "
Not a Good idea to set fire to Airports - I Think the guy that tried that in Glasgow got Headbutted !! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"WH Smiths in T 1 heathrow didn't have any newspapers this morning !!! I mean FFS , there a newsagent ???? But they had plenty of cadburys fucking cream eggs, One Direction Calendars, and bloody wanky mugs with poxy comments on that arnt even funny didn't they .......just what you need to pass the time on an hours flight ??? Wrong !! WHS you pricks , people want a newspaper !!! And if you ask to scan my boarding card one more time I will set you on fucking fire . "
What is this world coming to hey? Bloody disgraceful!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wonder......
how many Cadburys Cream Eggs do you reckon you could eat on an hours flight?
You know if you were bored, no paper to read....
not sure but I managed to fit 3 in my mouth in one go today..another proud achievement
3, I'm impressed
next forum challenge maybe ~ how many cream eggs can u fit in your mouth photo....!! "
it was very impressive...until my friends squidged my cheeks together..very messy |
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By *wiftieeMan
over a year ago
near Glasgow |
"Why would WHSmiths scan your boarding card?"
Good question, but it's not just WHS, anything you buy in 'departures', you have to produce your boarding card! Why?? For some weird reason though, it doesn't apply to/in the restaurants or bars!
No doubt another decision made by some EU plonker!  |
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"WH Smiths in T 1 heathrow didn't have any newspapers this morning !!! I mean FFS , there a newsagent ???? But they had plenty of cadburys fucking cream eggs, One Direction Calendars, and bloody wanky mugs with poxy comments on that arnt even funny didn't they .......just what you need to pass the time on an hours flight ??? Wrong !! WHS you pricks , people want a newspaper !!! And if you ask to scan my boarding card one more time I will set you on fucking fire . "
Reading this is better than reading any paper OP funny as.... |
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By *wiftieeMan
over a year ago
near Glasgow |
"will put a Daily Record by for your next visit to Scottylandyshire "
And there's another Thursday rant, trying to get a Daily Record at Gatwick?! And they wonder why some folk want independence?? Start treating us as equals and it might be a different story!!
It is still Thursday, isn't it? |
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"WH Smiths in T 1 heathrow didn't have any newspapers this morning !!! I mean FFS , there a newsagent ???? But they had plenty of cadburys fucking cream eggs, One Direction Calendars, and bloody wanky mugs with poxy comments on that arnt even funny didn't they .......just what you need to pass the time on an hours flight ??? Wrong !! WHS you pricks , people want a newspaper !!! And if you ask to scan my boarding card one more time I will set you on fucking fire . "
There really is no pleasing you isn't there lol
D x |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"WH Smiths in T 1 heathrow didn't have any newspapers this morning !!! I mean FFS , there a newsagent ???? But they had plenty of cadburys fucking cream eggs, One Direction Calendars, and bloody wanky mugs with poxy comments on that arnt even funny didn't they .......just what you need to pass the time on an hours flight ??? Wrong !! WHS you pricks , people want a newspaper !!! And if you ask to scan my boarding card one more time I will set you on fucking fire .
There really is no pleasing you isn't there lol
D x "
Well you haven't tried very hard ? |
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By *icketysplitsWoman
over a year ago
Way over Yonder, that's where I'm bound |
"You've been on a plane? Well done you. You sir, are truly one of life's movers and shakers.
I fear the big iron bird. 'Taint natural. "
They'll stone you where you're from if you get uppity and think you can get in one of them.
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"Might I make a simple suggestion OP. You might think it's odd and way out but why don't you buy a paper before you get to the airport? You seem to get your knickers in a twist about the WHSmith at T1
Thanks for that shite suggestion . Perhaps the next time I plan to go to Tescos , I go to Asda first in case Tesco don't have what I want !!!! "
I really don't know why, bit this response had me actually rolling on the floor laughing!
Yes, I know, next step is the self-hugging jacket!
Quality rant Sir, I salute you! |
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