FabSwingers.com > Forums > The Lounge > Is this really for me
Is this really for me
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Well just wondering if this site is for me i seem to get a lot of stick for being a larger lady on this site
i dont hide who i am but should i just leave or dont listen to them |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Defiantly just ignore them. There are plenty of guys on here who like curvier, larger, bbw ladies (myself included). Don't give in to the few, stay and enjoy yourself...... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Well we have had a lot of guys in the past ask the same so in the forum time honored tradition.
I bid you fare well, if its not working have a break or delete and find happier pastures and drop the latch on the door as you go. |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
Being honest, if you're relying on strangers to make that decision for you or to help prop up your self-esteem, this may not be a healthy place for you.
It's a decision only you can make. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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well you make more of an effort than some of the men on here i think you look nice in most of your pics.
dont worry about being big as there are quite a few big people on here men as well as women. you will always get hateful people even if your not big they will find something else to critisize you for. |
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Larger women are not my preference but I'd never message somome and be horrible and nasty to them.
as a post above says there are lots of guys that love bbw, so don't give up and just block the ones that message not very nice things.
best of luck |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've had guys who mail me just to tell me how fat and ugly I am, usually unverified guys who are sour that they can't get meets and target those they think are weak.
Sadly for them I'm not one of the weak ones, I know I'm fat so I tend to play along. Ask them why they are stating the obvious, point out their lack of meets but remain polite. I find they get pissed off that I don't react in the way they want to and block me before I have to block them before becoming UNLOS.
It's not personal to you, if you were slim they would target you for something else. That's what bullies do. |
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Whilst there is no need for rudeness from anyone and I dont know what form it takes
I do find your Profile long and very contradictory
* you are not meeting... you want social meets first etc.. you come across very harsh.. Im going to block for this and that... its quite aggressive I guess it causes people to be that way back.
This place is quite fun just on the social side maybe just get into forums first .. good luck if you stay... |
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Aaaaah the internet is much like the wild west except instead of guns there are keyboards and instead of horses there are iPads and instead of sheriff's badges there are rusty sheriff's badges and instead of cowboy hats there are fez's. Do you see what I mean? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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People who feel the need to send abusive messages about a persons appearance are sad and pathetic and are only trying to boost their fragile ego by belittling a complete stranger as they have no self confidence or respect. I know its difficult at times but ignore them, those messages say way more about them than you and don't let them spoil things for you. Have fun, they probably won't with that attitude |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There are shitheads everywhere not just here.
I recently read that overweight ppl get abused a lot IRL.
Whilst I don't think that fat-shaming is morally right, it may work as a catalyst for some people to decide to change and improve their health and subsequently their appearance as well.
Whatever you decide you should do it because it is right for you regardless of what anyone says.
Good luck! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Whilst I don't think that fat-shaming is morally right, it may work as a catalyst for some people to decide to change and improve their health and subsequently their appearance as well.
Whatever you decide you should do it because it is right for you regardless of what anyone says.
Good luck!"
Really? Bullying someone will make them suddenly diet and lose weight? In most cases over eating is as much of an eating disorder as anorexia. Bullying will just encourage comfort eating, without knowing the reasons behind overeating, trying to shame someone into losing weight could have dire consequences.
I lost 2 stone FOR ME not because those who shamed me made me lose weight, I did it for myself to combat my demons regarding food. I'm still fat, am I ashamed? Nope, am I unhealthy? Nope, am I fit? Fairly fit as I keep active.
I plan on losing more weight in my own time at a steady pace. No amount of bullying has helped my weight loss, I did it MYSELF for MYSELF.
Typical comment from a gym bunny. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We are all beautiful in our own way - just because your a fuller woman does that mean you don't deserve fun and sexual freedom? NO!!!! There are guys on here that adore a voluptuous women stick to those. You are a 'Goddess' and should be treated like one xxxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Whilst I don't think that fat-shaming is morally right, it may work as a catalyst for some people to decide to change and improve their health and subsequently their appearance as well.
Whatever you decide you should do it because it is right for you regardless of what anyone says.
Good luck!
Really? Bullying someone will make them suddenly diet and lose weight? In most cases over eating is as much of an eating disorder as anorexia. Bullying will just encourage comfort eating, without knowing the reasons behind overeating, trying to shame someone into losing weight could have dire consequences.
I lost 2 stone FOR ME not because those who shamed me made me lose weight, I did it for myself to combat my demons regarding food. I'm still fat, am I ashamed? Nope, am I unhealthy? Nope, am I fit? Fairly fit as I keep active.
I plan on losing more weight in my own time at a steady pace. No amount of bullying has helped my weight loss, I did it MYSELF for MYSELF.
Typical comment from a gym bunny."
Good for you and well done on improving yourself.
I agree with your comments and do start off by saying that fat shaming is wrong.
Good luck in achieving your target weight at your chosen pace. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Whilst I don't think that fat-shaming is morally right, it may work as a catalyst for some people to decide to change and improve their health and subsequently their appearance as well.
Whatever you decide you should do it because it is right for you regardless of what anyone says.
Good luck!
Really? Bullying someone will make them suddenly diet and lose weight? In most cases over eating is as much of an eating disorder as anorexia. Bullying will just encourage comfort eating, without knowing the reasons behind overeating, trying to shame someone into losing weight could have dire consequences.
I lost 2 stone FOR ME not because those who shamed me made me lose weight, I did it for myself to combat my demons regarding food. I'm still fat, am I ashamed? Nope, am I unhealthy? Nope, am I fit? Fairly fit as I keep active.
I plan on losing more weight in my own time at a steady pace. No amount of bullying has helped my weight loss, I did it MYSELF for MYSELF.
Typical comment from a gym bunny."
To be fair you are both right. The original post stated "some" people, though I would guess the some = a minority.
Let's all remember that overweight doesn't have to equal over-eating. I know an obese person who increased their calories to lose weight.
Evie do what's best for you whether that is staying/going/changing your lifestyle etc. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You need a thick skin here and not everyone is nice. Ignore those and concentrate on the others .
there is someone for everyone on here so dont be downhearted by petty minded people.
When you get pissed off, dont bite, hide your profile and have a break.
good luck |
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"Well just wondering if this site is for me i seem to get a lot of stick for being a larger lady on this site
i dont hide who i am but should i just leave or dont listen to them"
do you want to live a life where people believe they ave won because you run away all the time?
That's what yo are doing.
If they weren't being nasty about you being overweight chances are someone will find something else to be horrible about. Some people aren't happy unless thy are making someone else miserable.
Live your life how you want to live it. No one can tel you to stay and no one should make you feel you have to go either. |
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"Well just wondering if this site is for me i seem to get a lot of stick for being a larger lady on this site
i dont hide who i am but should i just leave or dont listen to them"
1. Only you can decide that.
Why take the advice of the forumites over the advice of the messagers /
In the end you will take the advice you like and make out that those that don't say what you want to hear are mean n nasty.
What ever you do this is a site for adults and part of being adult is not crumbling when Joe Shit of Somewhere indulges in playground behaviour.
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Are you happy as you are? Or do you want to lose weight? If you are happy have the confidence to not let the mean messages get to you, hold your head high and be proud of who you are. If you would like to lose weight, then try and lose a little, half a stone can make lots of difference to someones confidence. You have nice clear photos on your profile, the one with the purple shrug is really nice.
People that like you will message you, they can see what they are getting. If you get mean messages i bet they are from unverified people, noone who is doing well on the site would waste their time sending such messages.
If you leave the site what will you do?
Maybe have a little revamp of your profile and make it less negative.
Im big and i dont get nasty messages, now im not sure why, whether its to do with my profile or not.
Good luckx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Block. Just block.
You don't want have to nor need to waste time on people, who will waste your time and theirs on negative comments.
There are guys out there who would like to meet you. Save your energy for them.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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OP you've been on the site for a year or more, surely by now you would know whether this is the site for you or not?
If you get abusive messages, just report, block and move on |
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Just bloke their arses sweet.... Simples! On here you have to have skin like a rino ! ... Don't allow the rantings of a frustrated dick splash to spoil your enjoyment!... Plenty of men who are attracted to all us woman, what ever our shape and size... As for the haters? bollox to them! insignificant really aint they! |
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I have only had one guy who has been abusive but I just asked him if he felt better now he had vented his spleen and if I was such a fat horrid person why was he so bothered if I didn't want to meet him, and then said that I hoped he enjoyed the rest of his evening, then he changed his name and tried again, so I was still polite but unmoved
People are strange aren't they but you have to realise they are just keyboard users and their words should not matter to us in the slightest |
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By *emmefataleWoman
over a year ago
dirtybigbadsgirlville |
Rudeness and abuse are not acceptable under any circumstances.
We have preferences, you state, you don't like skinny men
"I am a larger gal so if u want a size six skinny waist and skinny jeans...."
You seem to be obsessed with the word "skinny", stop comparing yourself to others, you are you. Diamondsmiles is right in her post.
Learn to like yourself. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Block. Just block.
You don't want have to nor need to waste time on people, who will waste your time and theirs on negative comments.
There are guys out there who would like to meet you. Save your energy for them.
"
I agree, ignore those mindless idiots. If all they to do is slag women off for their size then they r narrow minded dweebs.
Ignore wiv the contempt they deserve. I bet they wldnt b so brave as to say it to yr face, they all hide behind a screen. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I suggest you go to the bbw bash at chameleons you will love it plus it will do wonders for your confidence you dont have to play just go and mingle and enjoy the attention x |
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"Larger women are not my preference but I'd never message somome and be horrible and nasty to them.
as a post above says there are lots of guys that love bbw, so don't give up and just block the ones that message not very nice things.
best of luck "
This guy took the words out of my mouth. So yeah, what he said! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You have nothing at all to feel bad about. You have several Verifications, so you definitely have some good stuff going on. Anybody that puts you down is just weak, jealous, or they can't get any meets themselves. There's no need for anybody to attack anybody else on here.
Just be yourself, and ignore the Haters.
-JD |
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"Well just wondering if this site is for me i seem to get a lot of stick for being a larger lady on this site
i dont hide who i am but should i just leave or dont listen to them"
If you don't know if this is for you how can you realistically expect strangers to answer that for you?
There are bigger people on site, me being one of them, who have never had a negative comment about size. Had plenty for my opinions but I could give a monkeys what nonentities think.
In fact I met my oh on here. That said his dream woman is Annie Hawkins...she makes me feel petite, so it's all good! |
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"Well just wondering if this site is for me i seem to get a lot of stick for being a larger lady on this site
i dont hide who i am but should i just leave or dont listen to them"
Just don't listen to them. You are who you are. Block any idiots. |
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