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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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what would your one swing manifesto be?
i would ban all cock and fanny shots from being the main aviator
put chat room up for cpls only as well as general
put chat rooms up for sexual preferences
allow a search facility on sexual preferences
give free std checks at every swing club
have group sex available on the nhs for anyone over 60 (thinking of my retirement)
ban anyone under 25 from entering swinging (you have to have been divorced had kids had a mortgage got married again etc )
make it a criminal offence to send out old pics
dogging is permitted after 9pm in any woodland area
free bdsm lessons
oh i could go on  |
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By *aucy3Couple
over a year ago
glasgow |
"what would your one swing manifesto be?
i would ban all cock and fanny shots from being the main aviator
put chat room up for cpls only as well as general
put chat rooms up for sexual preferences
allow a search facility on sexual preferences
give free std checks at every swing club
have group sex available on the nhs for anyone over 60 (thinking of my retirement)
ban anyone under 25 from entering swinging (you have to have been divorced had kids had a mortgage got married again etc )
make it a criminal offence to send out old pics
dogging is permitted after 9pm in any woodland area
free bdsm lessons
oh i could go on "
we are totally crap at the lingo.whats bdsm.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"what would your one swing manifesto be?
i would ban all cock and fanny shots from being the main aviator
put chat room up for cpls only as well as general
put chat rooms up for sexual preferences
allow a search facility on sexual preferences
give free std checks at every swing club
have group sex available on the nhs for anyone over 60 (thinking of my retirement)
ban anyone under 25 from entering swinging (you have to have been divorced had kids had a mortgage got married again etc )
make it a criminal offence to send out old pics
dogging is permitted after 9pm in any woodland area
free bdsm lessons
oh i could go on "
don't ban the under 25's! They are delicious! |
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By *ig badMan
over a year ago
Up North :-) |
"what would your one swing manifesto be?
i would ban all cock and fanny shots from being the main aviator
put chat room up for cpls only as well as general
put chat rooms up for sexual preferences
allow a search facility on sexual preferences
give free std checks at every swing club
have group sex available on the nhs for anyone over 60 (thinking of my retirement)
ban anyone under 25 from entering swinging (you have to have been divorced had kids had a mortgage got married again etc )
make it a criminal offence to send out old pics
dogging is permitted after 9pm in any woodland area
free bdsm lessons
oh i could go on we are totally crap at the lingo.whats bdsm. "
Big Dick Small Mouth  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"what would your one swing manifesto be?
i would ban all cock and fanny shots from being the main aviator
put chat room up for cpls only as well as general
put chat rooms up for sexual preferences
allow a search facility on sexual preferences
give free std checks at every swing club
have group sex available on the nhs for anyone over 60 (thinking of my retirement)
ban anyone under 25 from entering swinging (you have to have been divorced had kids had a mortgage got married again etc )
make it a criminal offence to send out old pics
dogging is permitted after 9pm in any woodland area
free bdsm lessons
oh i could go on
don't ban the under 25's! They are delicious! "
It's ok.. I'm 26 in a week  |
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By *aucy3Couple
over a year ago
glasgow |
"what would your one swing manifesto be?
i would ban all cock and fanny shots from being the main aviator
put chat room up for cpls only as well as general
put chat rooms up for sexual preferences
allow a search facility on sexual preferences
give free std checks at every swing club
have group sex available on the nhs for anyone over 60 (thinking of my retirement)
ban anyone under 25 from entering swinging (you have to have been divorced had kids had a mortgage got married again etc )
make it a criminal offence to send out old pics
dogging is permitted after 9pm in any woodland area
free bdsm lessons
oh i could go on we are totally crap at the lingo.whats bdsm.
Big Dick Small Mouth "
i hope youve got that the wrong way round.for my friend of course.  |
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There will be a basic taxation rate of 5%.
You may alter your age on your profile and knock a few years off, however there will be a 2% increase on your basic tax rate for every year you knock off. Under 25’s who add years to their age will also be subject to a 2% increase per year added.
You may use any photos you like on your profile; however the following tax penalties will apply:
Photos 12 to 23 months old = 1%
Photos 24 to 47 months old = 2%
Photos 48 to 71 months old = 5%
Photos over 72 months old = 10%
Photos which aren’t really you = 50%
Close-up genial shots = 1% per photo
If you wish to reply to profiles with generalised cut and paste messages or without reading the profile of the recipient first, you must apply for a ‘lazy bastard’ permit and will be subject to a 5% taxation penalty. Failure to apply for the appropriate permit will result in a ban and fixed penalty fine.
Arranging a meet and failing to show without sending a cancellation message will become a criminal offence:
First offence = £60 fixed penalty fine
Second offence = £500 fixed penalty fine + 3 month ban
Third offence = £1000 fixed penalty fine + 12 month ban
Forth offence = 3 month custodial sentence. Each subsequent offence will result in a custodial sentence twice the duration of the pervious.
You will be able to claim tax relief on condoms, latex, rubber and pvc play wear, sex toys and swinging club membership.
Accusing someone of being a fake just because they don’t want to meet you will result in mandatory attendance of ‘swinger school’ at which you will be pissed on by a minimum of 7 minger tramps and have a rusty 300mm adjustable wrench stuffed up your arse without lube.
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By *icknDeeCouple
over a year ago
hartlepool |
"Accusing someone of being a fake just because they don’t want to meet you will result in mandatory attendance of ‘swinger school’ at which you will be pissed on by a minimum of 7 minger tramps and have a rusty 300mm adjustable wrench stuffed up your arse without lube."
Can we just sign up for this, without having to accuse anyone of anything?
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By *aucy3Couple
over a year ago
glasgow |
"Accusing someone of being a fake just because they don’t want to meet you will result in mandatory attendance of ‘swinger school’ at which you will be pissed on by a minimum of 7 minger tramps and have a rusty 300mm adjustable wrench stuffed up your arse without lube.
Can we just sign up for this, without having to accuse anyone of anything?
"
at least make the effort.commit the offence.can i be a minging tramp. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I would also like to add that swingers should be categorised by their looks ie sexy, gorgeous, a bit iffy, handsome, minger etc etc so it will make it easier in the search options.
Face pics would be sent to me and i will decide what category they should be in.
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By *icknDeeCouple
over a year ago
hartlepool |
"at least make the effort.commit the offence.can i be a minging tramp. "
Oh if you must... _aucy3 is a fake 'cos they wouldn't make the 90 mile trip to meet us at 2 minutes notice.
Hope you've got a rusty wrench handy, lol |
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By *aucy3Couple
over a year ago
glasgow |
"at least make the effort.commit the offence.can i be a minging tramp.
Oh if you must... _aucy3 is a fake 'cos they wouldn't make the 90 mile trip to meet us at 2 minutes notice.
Hope you've got a rusty wrench handy, lol "
if i can be a minging,pissing, tramp.we will be there in a minute.rusty wrenches are ten a penny. will see yous in a minute. |
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